39 answers

What Should Ring Bearer Wear

My three year old son is the ring bearer in my brother's October wedding. The groomsmen are wearing black tux's. And the brides maids are wearing burgundy. The bride & groom have told me that they don't care what my son wears. It's up to me.

Does my son need to wear a suit or tux? Should it be black? Can he wear grey or khaki slacks and a button down shirt with a bow tie, maybe a blazer? What have you seen?

My mom thinks a 3 year old would look silly in a tux. She thinks he should wear a pant from Ralph Lauren that is winter white (so would speak to the flower girl's dress), a pink oxford (speaks to the pink flowers), suspenders, and a bow tie that she found at RL which is deep red with blue and a touch of gold. I'm not sure I agree with her.

What would you suggest?

What can I do next?

So What Happened?™

Thanks to everyone for your advice. We went with a black suit with a white shirt for several reasons. The fit was excellent (better than the tux I saw), the bride did not care, and my mom really has a problem with a tux. I ordered him a tie to match the wedding party from Beauties.com (great website!). In the end, I was really happy with how it all turned out.

Featured Answers

My son was 2-1/2 when he was a ring bearer. We rented the tux from www.gagas.com (I think that's what it is!) and for a little black tux, shirt, tie, it came to something like $17 and that included shipping back! I would do that instead of having to buy something he might not wear again or spend more than you need to. And he looked adorable in a tiny tux!!!

I have always seen the ring bearer wearing a little tux, just like the grownups. Depending on where the tuxes were rented, it might be free but I don't think they are full price if they aren't free. They always look so cute!

My son has been a ring bearer in two weddings at ages 2 and 3. He wore a tux in both. At the second wedding we rented one from www.gagas.com. It was an easy process and much cheaper than buying a tux and he looked SO cute in a tux both times!

More Answers

Your brother and wife to be should have told you what they want him to wear. I've always seen the ring bearer's wearing a mini version of whatever the groomsmen are wearing.

You can rent tuxes in that size. But he would look cute in anything similar. I kind of think the dress pants and suspenders sounds cute ;) Have fun!!

I think that you should go and rent a tux for him. in the long run it will be cheaper than buying the whole get up and he can only wear it once anyway, since they grow out of things so quickly. Dont put too much pressure on him to walk down the aisle. He may clam up and decide he dosnt want to.

about me: Self employed Mom of three great "kids" 24 (married and out of house), 23 (out of house), 17 (junior in high school).

When I got married I had my 2 1/2 year old nephews as ring bearers. They wore a mini version of the groomsman's tux. They looked absolutely adorable. They even had a mini version of the groomsmen's corsages. I didn't think they looked silly and pictures with all the groomsmen were precious. You can rent the little tuxes at most any tux rental place and they do "temporary tailoring" so that they fit. I think only the flower girls (and the bride) should wear white. No offense, but the white pants, pink shirt, and bow tie you described don't sound seasonally appropriate and perhaps a little gaudy. I would go with either the tux or a black suit with a tie that coordinates with either the bridesmaid dresses or the flowers.

Ask the bride and groom and follow their recommendations.

My son has abeen in two weddings as the ring bearer and both times he wore a tux. Try this website - www.gagas.com - You can rent formal wear at a much lower price than somewhere like Gingiss. Free shipping - both ways. Highly recommend this site - I got an outfit plus shoes for my son for less than 40 bucks.

My son has been a ring bearer in two weddings at ages 2 and 3. He wore a tux in both. At the second wedding we rented one from www.gagas.com. It was an easy process and much cheaper than buying a tux and he looked SO cute in a tux both times!

The ring bearer usually matches the suit/tux to the other males in the wedding party. I'm sure the bride would have an opinion on this. Any variations to the dress code should go through the bride or a very-involved groom (and still the bride!) You'll want to get this right and not go on hearsay. Good luck.

Depending on what the bride/groom say, you can get 3 piece dressy outfits for boys at department stores. They usually come out for the holidays so in Sept they may be in stock. I bought mine a set that had black pants, white banded neck shirt with black stud button at the collar and a black vest. He looked great next to the men with tuxes plus he wore it many times after that for special occassions.Good Luck.

Why isn't he wearing a little tux? I had my 2 nephews in tux's for my wedding being ringbearers. it was adorable. If that is not an option, I would go with a black suit for sure...so he looks like the groomsmen.

This is a question for the bride to answer. They do rent tuxes for little guys and if I were the bride that's what I would want. But she might have other ideas. Ask her and be prepared to execute her vision.

Or, choose what you want but run it by her to be sure she's comfortable with it.

You should ask the bride, after all it is her day. But if she doesn't care, then go with what you like. My sons were both in my sister-in-law's wedding and I found matching sets at Penney's for about $25-40/ each. They each wore a button down shirt, tie, vest & pants. They typically have the shirts in various colors (white, pink, blue, yellow, mint green). Sears carries them also. For my older son, the tie was a little short, so I bought a separate clip-on tie that was easy to remove after the ceremony.

I have never seen a ring bearer in anything other than a tux, including when my 15 month old was a ring bearer. You can buy them for cheaper than renting them, my sons was $54. The ring bearer doesn't typically wear a colored shirt, he is suppose to match the groom in most instances.

J.,
My son is 6 and is the Ring Bearer for my cousins wedding in 2 weeks and we have rented a tux that was picked out by the bride and groom. I have always seen ring bearers in tuxs. You need to ask your brother and his future wife, they may have already picked something out. It was only $70 to rent the tux which included everything except the socks. And again it was just like he was a groosman everything was already picked out by the bride and groom and we just went in and had him fitted. Good Luck.

I think a young boy in a tux is adorable and not silly at all! In fact, I went to a wedding this weekend and the ring bearer was literally 1 month old and even he was wearing a mini-tux, wherever in the world they found it! I say go with a tux, I'm not a fan of the suspenders and bow tie idea. Sounds like it's a formal wedding and he should be in theme.

Plus you have to consider the pictures. Everyone's going to be in black or burgundy, besides for the bride and flower girl, and then he's going to be in white and pink. He would stand out. All the men should be dressed the same, regardless of age.

I have always seen the ring bearer wearing a little tux, just like the grownups. Depending on where the tuxes were rented, it might be free but I don't think they are full price if they aren't free. They always look so cute!

It is up to the bride and groom. They may assume just by asking your son to be ring bearer that you are familiar with the tradition of wearing a mini-tux. I would follow up with them before you spend money on your own suit or other clothes.

It is usually up to the bride. I have seen the little ring bearers also in tuxes to match the groomsmen otherwise a black suit with a burgundy tie would match nicely. It just depends on how formal the wedding party will be.

He should wear a tux that matches the groomsmen.

C. T.

My son was 2-1/2 when he was a ring bearer. We rented the tux from www.gagas.com (I think that's what it is!) and for a little black tux, shirt, tie, it came to something like $17 and that included shipping back! I would do that instead of having to buy something he might not wear again or spend more than you need to. And he looked adorable in a tiny tux!!!

They usually match the groom. Wear a black tux and look like a little groom. My son is three and was just in his uncle (my brother's)wedding. The wedding was large so the groom and my son each got their tux for free. MANY places do that (We got that deal in my wedding as well for our ring bearer.) It wouldn't hurt to ask about that at the place they have chosen or have your brother shop around if they have not already picked a place. It looks so cute and the florist had a really tiny rose that was just right with for with his tux it was very cute. We were all in the wedding (we had burgundy dresses with rose accents and my daugher had ivory to match the bride with a sash that matched the bridesmaids.) The tux places we looked at only had black for the ring bearer sizes but I am sure if the groom is doing white or ivory they would have that too. Ask the bride what she wants in her pictures!!! It is her day (and your brother's but guys don't usually care as much as the bride) and your mom will do best to listen to the bride and keep quiet unless asked, though it can be hard sometimes.

A Wedding can be a very stressful event for the bride and groom. Let what the ring bearer wears be ONE less stress as they have enough other things to stress out about. You do not want to add to their stress in any way. With that said, ask the bride if she would like the ring bearer in a black tux (traditional). If so, you can find really inexpensive black tux, shoes, etc on the internet. Try e-bay. When I got married I found tux's on e-bay between $15 to $25 for a ring bearer. I think I also saw black tux for kids at Burlington (the store typically for coats but they also sell kids clothes).

Good Luck.

Normally the ring bearer wears a tux as well. Don't buy a new one. My sister in law bought her's for her son on Ebay also just try google cause you can find used ones. Somtimes you can go to bridal salons and they have end of the year sales so you can get a pretty good deal also.

My nephew was just shy of 3 when we got married and I had him dress like the groomsmen, in a tux. He took pictures with the bridal party so we wanted him dressed like the rest of the party.

Good Luck!

We had our nephew as the ring bearer at our wedding. He wore a tux and matched all the other tuxes. I'd ask the bride what she wants him to wear because he will be expected to participate in all "wedding party" pictures, introductions, etc. I know I was very specific about what I wanted my wedding party to wear because of the pictures.

My nephew wore a tux at my wedding and he was 3 at the time. When we did it, 9 years ago, they gave the ring bearers tux rental for free with the rental of the groomsman and groom. It is something that you could check into.

Hope this helps.

Ask the bride and groom what they want, but most likely a tux like the rest of the wedding party. Sometimes the ring bearers tux will even be free from the rental place if it is a big enough wedding party. The couple getting married makes the decision on what your son wears though.

I have never seen the ring bearer wear anything other than a smaller version of what the groomsmen wear. Pricey, but definately adorable!

J.,

Usually the ring bearer is little groomsman. They usually wear a tux with a matching bow tie or cumberbund in the girl's colors. My son was 4 when he was the ring bearer for my sister's wedding. I rented it and it wasn't expensive. Some second hand shops have them cheap to buy also. Don't forget the shoes:)

He should wear a black tux since that is what the groomsmen are wearing. The bride should be helping you find out where to get it...usually it is at the same place where the groomsmen got their tuxes. I wouldn't consider anything else in this situation.

My ringbearers wore all white.. and was adorable! They were both around 3 and 5

You should probably ask the bride or groom on what they want your son to wear. My boys has been ring bearers a couple of times and they had always worn the matching tux like the wedding party.

I've ordered tux for kids online and you'll be surprised that you can get them for like $30. Of course you get hat you pay for. The material is a lot lighter in weight, but it sure as hell better than renting it for over $150. And that's rental.

Good Luck!

:-)M.
Mom of 3
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My 2 yr old son was in a wedding in May and looked absolutely adorable in his tux. I bought it from Von Maur in Yorktown Mall and it was approximately $75.00. They also have socks to match. I got his shoes from Payless and they also have them at Walmart ...comfy and inexpensive for one day. He can always use them for the upcoming holidays too! Good luck.

My son was the ring bearer at my brother's wedding when he was three years old. We rented him a tux along with the groomsmen and groom. IT WAS DARLING! It came with shoes and all. So, it was nice to not have to buy it all because he probably would have not worn it again after that. The little tux is just adorable!

I believe you should be asking the bride and or your brother, not us.
Unless she has told you that it is up to you to decide what your child will wear.

Hi J.,

When my oldest son was 2 years old, he was the ringbearer at my sister's wedding. I went to the tux place, and they told me that they only sold tuxes in the toddler sizes, they did not rent them. At that point, I figured was going to be a fortune...but the tiny tux only cost $15!!! It had a little white shirt, pants, bow tie, jacket, and cumberbund. We just has to buy little black socks and shoes. So if your brother wants him to wear a tux, it may end up being less expensive than you think!! :-)

Good luck and enjoy the wedding!

J. D.

How wonderful! Ask your (soon to be ) sister-in-law and brother! Most times the groomsmen all get their tuxs from the same rental place -set up by the bride and groom-and she may have a tux/suit picked out for the ring bearer(s) as well.
So as not to step on anyone's toes and cause any undue stress~ ask them.
Good luck and enjoy!

The ring bearer should wear whatever the bride or groom
(whomever is in charge) is requesting he wear. What's
acceptable isn't relevant ..... you have to think about the pictures. All the groomsmen in black tux and one fine
young man in a different color!

they typically get a mini tux for the ring bearer. If you don't do that, and they are wearing black tuxes, I would go with a black suit.

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