What Do You Want to Hear from or See in a Teacher?

Updated on September 17, 2010
K.B. asks from Spring, TX
11 answers

I am currently a SAHM but I hold a teaching certificate from out of state. I am in the process of completing the requirements to get a certificate in my new home state. When I graduated from college (several years ago) the job market for teachers was awful so I never got to use my training or gain experience as a full time teacher. I was a sub, teacher's aid, and tutor. My plan is to try to start teaching full time in 2013 or so, once my youngest is in school. So I have a lot of time to ponder this question but I was curious what advice some of you might have.
It seems from many posts on this site that there is an immediate distrust of the teachers and administration at school and an automatic assumption that the child in question is being victimized by the school. I've seen this trend through several posts mainly in the responses received. Most of the questions appear to be honest "what should I do" type questions but so many responses are to the tune of "march in there and demand that the school does X, Y, and Z" or "Pull your child out of that school, get your child moved to another classroom, etc." As a parent I understand the need to advocate for your child.
So my question is what have you heard from teachers at the beginning of the year that you liked. What did they do or say that made you feel comfortable with their judgement and to the point where you felt if there was a problem you could have a reasonable conversation with them without going into it in full battle gear? Is there a any specific traits or practices that you have seen or would like to see in your child's teacher that would establish more of a partnership and less of a conflict?

Thank you for any and all advice,
K.

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M.M.

answers from Washington DC on

Both these responses hit the nail on the head.
As Ladybug wrote: Be the teacher you want you kids to have. Can any of us say it better?

My favorite teachers are the ones who welcomed me in the class to help or if they really didn't need me they welcomed me at field trips, parties etc. THey had a firm and consistent discipline.
THey did not "dumb down" the work and gave, my daughter especially, higher level work instead of her usual work, not just more busywork.
THey kept lines of communication open.

THe ones I did not care for.
Complained to the principal about my child.
Told me to put my son on Ritalin as he was unmanageable in kindergarten.
Had my very shy daughter "in charge" of a very rambunctious boy who didn't do his work, she was his seat mate and was there to be a good influence.
Did not call me or contact me immediately when something was amiss. I have four kids and sometimes can't check all homework.
One thing I really hated, two of mine were high readers and the teacher insisted we do half an hour of reading a night and document it. If you teach kinder or first and the child reads at a 6th-7th grade level focus on the kids who can't read. Help the high reader kids find books on their level with appropriate themes.

3 moms found this helpful
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M.P.

answers from Houston on

I've taught 6 years, thi syear being my 7th and I've learned a few things along the way. In addition, my son started Pre-k this year.

Communication is key!

Some ways I do this is call home in the first 2-3 weeks of school to say hello, introduce yourself, say something positive about the child, and invite the parents to Open House. This sets the ground rules and opens communication right off the bat.

I also send home a 'parent' homework assignment the first day of school, "Tell me about your child in a Million Words or Less." The kids love it and the parents usually get into it for the one's who complete the assignment. You will learn a lot this way - sometimes TOO much!

Send home a contact sheet with each child the first day and include email address spot. Also have them circle whether they check it "every day", "sometimes," or "rarely." If you don't get a response you will have to call but hopefully it will open this line of communication up.

Encourage email communication so you have a record of the conversation and you can respond with everthing you need in your room at your fingertips rather than trying to find it or having to call them back.

From the other side, our pre-k teacher gave us her phone number the first week of school and said "I know it can be tough to figure out what happened in the day or if your child just won't go to sleep until you sing him the song we sang today - give me a call." LOVED THAT!

A big thing is let them know you are human and may make mistakes. It happens. If they know they are working WITH you not against you it will make for a much better year.

Good luck. PM me if you want.

2 moms found this helpful

V.W.

answers from Jacksonville on

I agree that different age groups want different things. For elementary, I love the opportunity to be involved, or the know what would be helpful to the teacher (and therefore my child). I love getting information/communication in a timely and organized manner-- those last second notes sent home that must be returned the very next day are annoying. An overview note is much better than individual memos... (next week there will be 3 tests on _ days in _ subjects. Please make sure your child studies __ and is well rested/eats a good breakfast, etc).. Unfortunately, the only time I see those is when it is CRCT time.. a test that really has nothing to do with my child's success and everything to do with the teacher's/school's.
Don't give me a list of 90 things that you'll need my child to have at school (especially if you aren't going to use them until the spring or not at all). I will provide supplies (even extras) but I hate buying a bunch of stuff that sits on my counter at home for months b/c you aren't ready for it yet, or it's never needed at all. The "standard supply list" is wasteful.

If you are an upper grade teacher, please please keep a website and keep it current and updated. Please don't wait until the last 2 weeks of the grading period to let me know my child is struggling! Please give us an overview of how frequently you expect to test/give guizzes and how often to expect our kid to bring home homework in their class. At this age, kids invent all sorts of ways to avoid homework and study and if we don't know from you, we may not know at all. They are growing and maturing and learning to be responsible, but in our role as parents, we like to be in the loop to GUIDE that, not in the dark about what is going on. If you just update your grades online in a timely manner it is a HUGE help. A website with notes about what is going on in class, or a copy of the current list of vocab words is a fantastic thing to see! :)

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S.A.

answers from New York on

I think it would be great if the teachers posted the homework on-line so we could make sure the kids get it even if they are absent.Also letting parents know as soon as something is missed or a grade is below an 85. This goes for all grades. Teach the kids how to spell,write,study and research.
These subjects seem to have fallen off the chart and have been replaced with sex and drug awareness which is probably best taught by the parents anyway. Just because you have asked this question I fell confident that you will do a good job! Teachers who care not just about the kids but the family relationship are golden and hard to come by. Thanks for being a teacher and good luck!

1 mom found this helpful
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B.O.

answers from Portland on

I went to my daughter's open house today to meet her new teacher. This is what I liked:

The teacher explained the guidance philosophy that would be used.

The teacher gave me a comprehensive list of all goals that would be addressed as a group for the class.

The teacher had me fill out a questionnaire about my child's likes and dislikes, temperament, strengths and any goals or concerns I might have for my child. The teacher said this would be used to personalize the curriculum as much as possible.

The teacher told me that my input was greatly valued, as I know my child best.

The teacher gave me a list of how to help out in the classroom, and welcomed me to do so as much as I am able to. This particular teacher also expressed that the next two months would be extremely hectic as the class settled in, and that as they got to know all the children it would be extremely helpful for me to volunteer as much as I was able to help the transition go smoothly. I found this very welcoming and appreciated that the teacher was being honest about what he needed to be successful for the next few months.

The teacher took the opportunity of meeting me today to schedule a home visit with me next month to have a more in depth discussion about my child and to create personal goals for her based on classroom observations. I liked this a lot, it made me feel like I have an outlet for any concerns I might have between now and then.

I am also a teacher, and this is my advice to you:

Create positive communication with families as soon as possible. It is never a question of "if" a conflict will arise, but "when". With so many backgrounds merged into one working space, there will always be a time when we don't see eye to eye. I always tell parents that I am going to try my best to help their child succeed, and I welcome as much help as they are able to give me to do so. You will want to have positive communication established so that when you have to deal with delicate matters there will already be a working relationship in place to address those matters. You can create positive communication by addressing a child's strengths. I see so many teachers who do not do this, and wait until there is an issue that needs to be resolved to start a dialogue with parents.

Hope that helps and good luck!

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I have a 2nd grader, so not too many years experience here with teachers.
My son's K teacher was a techno-phobe and very bad at communication. We would get information late or never. That drove me nuts--especially with a Kindergarten kid....I felt out of the loop, always late with stuff....

My son's first grade teacher was awesome! Young, energetic, couldn't do enough for the kids or communicate enough. I felt she welcomed emails, questions, etc. She was loving with the kids and made learning FUN and my son loved her. They learned an unbelievable amount in first grade.

I think the advice "be the teacher you want your kids to have" is awesome advice. As you know kids are as different as night and day--shy, outgoing, soft-spoken, loud, demanding, introverted.....see them as individuals, not only as a "class" but also build that classroom team feeling. My son's 1st grade teacher was a master at recognizing individuality and promoting "team spirit" as well.

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K.M.

answers from Odessa on

Hi K.,
I have a son with behavior issues, I want a teacher and other school staff to listen to me, and take me seriously when I try to let them know ahead of time.
I also want to be able to see in the teacher's actions that he or she loves the job, and cares about the students. Teaching is not a job someone can do well unless they truly care about what they are doing.
A huge one for me is that I want the teacher and I to be in contact often, weather its talking, note's in a folder that goes back and forth, or even email. Whatever is easiest for the teacher. I never want to recieve a report card, or phone call that I have a child having problems that have been on going. I want to know pretty quick so that I can see to it its taken care of.

Also, if the teacher needs help with anything, I want to know. As parents its our responsibility to help out where needed .

School is not free daycare, our kids are there to learn.

our son very blessed right now to have a great teacher who is doing everything she can to help him, while keeping a very positive approach. The school as a whole is doing a great job helping him so far.

I have lived in a school district that got so bad, I did pull my daughter out and home school her. It was not because of one teacher, it was the school ( and district ). Overcrowding was a problem, unqualified people teaching, textbooks from a younger grade level, etc.

Good luck, if you go back into teaching, I hope you love it and that it works out great for you. It takes a very special person to be a great teacher! :-)

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R.L.

answers from Houston on

My son has had some self control issues, that are getting much better with age and maturity. So far his best teachers are ones that know that each child is different and has different needs. They have geared the discipline consequences etc to each child's needs. Some children need 2 warnings some only 1 etc. I've had horrible experiences with teachers who automatically assume that since my son has some self control issues (mostly with talking) that we are absentee parent who don't discipline him at home, which is the complete opposite of reality. I would say don't judge the parents based on the child's actions, but try to work with the child and parents toward the same goal which is to give that child an educations.

Also utilize the school counselors, that is what they are there for. If you are having issues with a child due to behavioral problems, have a meeting with the parents and ask the counselor to sit in. The counselor may recommend to see the child regularly to help the child adjust to school, learn some self discipline techniques etc. The counselors are not just for troubled kids but are there to help the klids be well rounded and advocate for the kids for their emotional and educational needs.

I was extremely frustrated that I had to request the counselor to be involved, only after meetings with the teacher, then principal. I had not idea there were such issues going on, the teacher had let things go too long and was not communicating with me on what the problems were.

Communication is key, as long as you communicate with your parents I'm sure you will do great!

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S.O.

answers from San Antonio on

First, thank you for being a teacher! We need more teachers who care about kids and WANT desperately to do a good job! I commend you for that.

There are some parents that are always in battle mode. I am not sure how you handle or diffuse that. I am a coach and work with 60 kids through out the spring & summer. 95 % of them are great and want to help me---5% must live just to make sure their child gets "special treatment." Not the same treatment....their child is "special." If I don't comply, they are ready to die on the hill of proving me wrong. If you can ever figure that out, I'd love to know how to disarm them.

Explaining that you are here to "partner with them in their child's education" is great. Tell them how to contact you and when, ask for them to give you x hours for a reply, as there are some days you'll hear from many parents. Tell them how they can help, ask that they speak to you about issues, and when they quesion that, THEN they go higher.
I know one mom at my kids previous school that hardly discussed things with the teacher....every hear say everything went to the principal! (Then, the principal has to stop that.)

As the parent of high schoolers, one other suggestion I would have is to be so organized that you don't lose kids' work or exams. There is so much of it and some of the assignments are so long, as you know.
My oldest son had 2 teachers in high school (2 different years) that were great at losing assignments. he would work hard, write a great paper, do a project, or whatever and "0's" kept showing up in the elec. grade book. Because she always lost things. This was very aggravating and about the 8th time in happened in one semester, I confess, I went into battle mode. My kid was so stressed every time he turned something in---the worst part is that it was a subject he used to enjoy, but that entire year with her made him dislike the whole subject area, unfortunately.

P.S. I love what Betty said about teacher's her kids have had.

May you have a long, successful and happy career in teaching!

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L.G.

answers from Austin on

Be prepared for parents that assume that their young, immature child is telling the 100% truth when they go home and complain about something at school. They seem to believe a young child over their common sense. It seems to be getting worse as more and more parents are enabling their children to complain and expect the parents to go in and make things easier for the child.

The parents that show up for "Back to School" night or open house are usually the ones that are the good parents. The ones who need to hear what you really want to say are the ones who are too busy to show up. See if there is an incentive you can come up with to get more parents there. Then you have the opportunity to do what others are suggesting.

B.A.

answers from Saginaw on

My oldest daughter is in Kindergarten so I don't have much experience. But my number one thing I like in a teacher is open communication and a good way to contact the teacher. Along with a teacher responding as quickly as they can. One thing that impressed me this year with my daughter's teacher is that she supplied her home phone number and stressed to us that she does not mind a call at home even if its a silly issue or question. This was along with an email address and not only that but she supplied a cell phone number. To me that screams dedication.

I also enjoyed receiving a yearly goal and we are also getting weekly updates on what they did during the week.

I am sure as my children get older my needs in a teacher will change, but again like I said a good line of communication is what I strongly feel the best about.

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