What Do You Call Your Daughter's....

Updated on January 14, 2008
J. asks from Skokie, IL
22 answers

Hi, Everyone:

My 23 mo. old is just starting to be at the age where she is curious about all body parts. I was curious how other mothers reference their daughter's vagina or what they call it when they go the the bathroom. I don't want to use pee-pee or poopy...At this point we've been calling bowel movements 'foo-foos' and urinating 'tinkle.'

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So What Happened?

Thank you to everyone for your informative responses. Honestly, I understand the need to use the anatomically appropriate language and I'm not opposed to it; however I was a bit overwhelmed with the tone of seriousness within most of the responses. When the time comes, I will certainly teach my daughter the correct names of her vulva, vagina etc.. and explain it all, just not at 23mo. old! Special thanks to those of you who had interesting/fun names.

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L.G.

answers from Chicago on

down south we called it a tutti. So that's what I grew up knowing it as...and daddy had a ding dong. This ought to be a fun one to read.

1 mom found this helpful
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J.K.

answers from Chicago on

My husband came up with the names:
for the boy's parts: ding-a-ling
for the girl's: hoo-ha

I tried calling breasts "boobs" once with my daughter, and she changed it to "boogalies."

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J.E.

answers from Chicago on

I agree that the proper terms are preferable by far. It is interesting that some people unknowingly use derrogatory terms (pudenda means "organs of shame").

You will probably usually be referring to her external parts, so vulva is more likely what you'd want to say as vagina, of course, means something different.

When I was growing up my parents used the term "BM" for bowel movement, that's one idea.

Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful
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L.F.

answers from Chicago on

I am against using cute names for body parts. There are two reasons why one for increasing the proper use of body part names and fuctions. Two how else will a child know how to defend themselves sexually if we do not start with proper body part names and tell them that no one has a right to touch them inside thier underware. There are to many preditors out there below 10 and older. We cannot scare our kids to death but we have to let them know there are bad people out there.

I love the analogy that people are like weather. Some are bright and shiney like a great sunny day. Some are glummy and sad like a rainy day. Some are loud and anrgy like a thunderstorm. Some are angry and distroy things like a tornado. Some just distroy everything in their path like a huricane. Then you ask your child how many different types of weather they have seen. This helps them understand that bad people are there but not all the time.

1 mom found this helpful
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M.C.

answers from Indianapolis on

We taught them the proper names but we also pee pee and poop if they have to go to the restroom!

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M.C.

answers from Chicago on

We call body parts by their proper names. To a child, they are just another body part like a toe or nose. We say pee or poop, and she will say, "mommy, I have to go potty" when she needs to use the restroom. I don't know if you plan on sending your child to preschool or not, but they prefer you use the more common terms so there are no misunderstandings or miscommunications.

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E.B.

answers from Chicago on

I am so glad to see that women recognize the vagina as the inside part and the vulva as the outside! My husband always says "vagina", as in "I can't believe you could see her vagina in that movie" and it drives me nuts. If an actress actually showed her vagina, I would be impressed. As for your question, I agree with using the proper terminology. Of course I have a son so the intricacies of the female body aren't an issue yet. If you feel "vagina" and "vulva" might be too complicated for your daughter at this point, my mom always had my sister and me refer to our outer organs as our "bottom". Yes, it's confusing since it's not technically the bottom, but it worked. Honestly, I don't think I knew there was an inside part until I was old enough to pronounce the word correctly.

Good luck!

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S.W.

answers from Chicago on

I just wanted to say no matter what you decide to call it make sure you are comfortable with your child saying it in public.

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E.H.

answers from Chicago on

If you are using vagina, you mean the inside. The outside is the vulva. When girls talk about their vagina hurting or being touched, it's more likely they are talking vulva. I can't imagine teaching a pre-schooler the subtle differences. I prefer using p****** p**** or privates.

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T.M.

answers from Terre Haute on

When I was young my mother taught us that these areas were our p****** p****. I also did this with my older son. It made it so much easier to have talks about good touch, bad touch. With potty, we used bubbles but it is a bit different with boys cause they can see the bubbles they make. Hope this helps. Shannon G. SAHM of 2 boys 9yrs, and 16mo. with hopes of adding an adopted 8 yr old boy.

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C.H.

answers from Evansville on

What I think and why is use the words that they are so she will not be a shamed of what they are called later on in life. I had to ask the same thing about over 6 months ago b/c i was using other words but didn't want them to be shamed of what it really is. The person told me if someone ever hurt them then you would know where they touched and how and you would be for sure you know that someone did touch them in that place or somewhere else. That is what was told to me and i can understand this. i hope this really helps. it is just like saying dog just use it in that way and they will not feel like it is a word not to use but tell them yes it is private. Other than that i hope it helps

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K.M.

answers from Chicago on

I have 3 year old twins and I call the body parts by their real names. OF first you feel silly saying it but it probably the right thing for the long run. Once she goes to preschool (probably at age 3) she will need to say pee pee or poo poo anyway once she has to go. good luck!

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H.L.

answers from Chicago on

I've always taught my children to just say they have to go to the bathroom. I don't excuse myself and tell other adults I have to pee! So I taught them to do the same. As for names... Vagina can be hard for them to say.... so until they get it we've used "who ha". I still called it vagina, just used both names. My son has always referred to his privates as the correct term. Poor kid still gets confused why his other siblings don't have one... only boy of four! ha! ha!!! HTH!

Mom to four great kids!

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D.T.

answers from Muncie on

Mine is still in diapers so there really isn't much need yet to use the terms. Usually I just inform her if she has a wet diaper that it's used and full of pee and dirty ones are dirty and have poop in them. As for her physical parts, I call them her "lady bits" or "girly parts". She's still too young to really need to know, it's mostly me being silly when I'm changing her.

Good luck.

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S.B.

answers from South Bend on

We call the vagina by its sanskrit name- Yoni (pronounced yoh nee). I think it is a beautiful word. We just call pee and poop what they are, so no help there. P.S.just want to say that I have told my kids that vagina is what most people call it, so they won't have any suprises.

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M.R.

answers from Chicago on

I'm so happy to read that so many mothers advocate using the correct terminology when it comes to describing p****** p****!

There's no need to bring shame to a body part, whether it is a vulva, vagina, toe, face, belly, whatever! Using proper terminology and being 'matter-of-fact' (not embarrassed) when talking about sexual organs or p****** p**** sends the signal to your child that knowing about these body parts is normal and healthy. Sending positive and clear messages from the get-go will only encourage your daughter to know that it is okay to come and talk to mommy about sexual health issues later on down the road, instead of looking it up on the internet (yikes!) or believing what she hears from friends at school.

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N.S.

answers from Chicago on

I have hwaed in Hawii they call it yoni for girl or I say potty goer.

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C.K.

answers from Chicago on

Usually it's better to use the correct terminology for all body parts and functions. Tinkle is ok, but for the rest call it what it is. It makes it a lot less confusing for kids as they grow up.

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C.H.

answers from Fort Wayne on

If your part time I going to assume your a step mom. I would talk to her mom and ask what she wants to use so the child is not confussed by two sets of words. If you are meaning your a working part time mom well dear I used "bottem- front or back" at that age. It all comes from the front hole or the back hole. lol For urination or bm we simply used the words "I have to use the bathroom". Since my family is in the public quite a bit it was less embarassing for dear old Dad. lol Just inform everyone around that this is what you are calling things and you will be fine. Good Luck.

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M.C.

answers from Chicago on

I guess it's an Italian thing but my MIL has always referred to the private area as a "coolie" so that's how we refer to it. Now as she's getting a little bigger, she'll refer to her "front coolie" or "back coolie" to let us know in specific what she's referring to. I like it because it doesn't sound like a p****** p*** or anything like that.

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M.E.

answers from Chicago on

I will be faced with that question in a few years. However, I know my sister always referenced it as a coochie to my niece. I know she used tinkle not sure what she called poopie, unless that is what she used. I have tried to figure out what I will tell my daughter when the time comes, and I think I am going to follow in my sister's step and use those references. Not sure if it will help or what you may want to use, but just what I know I have heard.

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D.F.

answers from Chicago on

Good Morning J.

Before my husband and I had kids, we talked about 'baby talk' for words and phrases and we both agreed that we would state their actual names. So when our children started asking 'what is this' we told them the names. When my eldest was 3 or 4 (he is 19 now) my sister-in-law said 'do you love me mo much', my son didn't know what 'mo' meant, so he asked me and I said 'so'. He ended up telling his aunt that he didn't talk like a baby so he would use the word 'so'. I can not believe she actually got mad at him! She has since had 3 kids of her own and no one in the family can understand half the stuff that her kids say because everything is baby talk.

God's Blessings
D.

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