Wedding Shower Thoughts?

For the raffle-type game, I've gone to showers where they had all the guests put their name and address on an envelope, and put it into a basket. Then a name is pulled to take home a centerpiece AND the bride to be can use the already addressed enveloped to mail out the thank you notes.

(done best if the bride already has her thank you notes picked out, and you can use the exact envelopes that she's going to need)

I also like gift bingo. Provide blank bingo cards. Everyone fills them in with what they think will be received, and the first person with bingo wins. Low key, and doesn't take extra time because it's happening while the gifts are being opened.

Yes, I've always seen the gifts opened, even at bigger showers.

No games. No one really likes them. Raffle ticket is a great idea. Address envelope to only the person invited. Yes gift get opened at shower. You and other hosts have to keep things moving. Enjoy!

I think it's a shame that you even have to tell people that a shower is not for children! But I think you have to hold firm - it's not just that it's an expense, it's that it's inappropriate. Nursing moms should of course bring their infants if they need to, but that's the limit.

Are you using purchase invitations or are you creating your own? You can do a lot of things easily through a print-on-demand service or your local quick printer. If you say something like "Join us for an elegant ladies luncheon at Chez Maurice in honor of Stephanie's upcoming nuptials" and perhaps print the menu (the absence of chicken fingers and fries ought to convey the overall atmosphere), that's a start. Make sure the invitation is just addressed to the recipient. If it's just women, it should be easier to manage - couples' showers start to look like family affairs.

You could put (and it's a shame if you have to) "Sorry that the function room cannot accommodate children") but you can also hope that you get accurate RSVPs so you can set up the room. If someone says she's coming with her 2 kids, then you can address it with a pause, then a surprised tone, by saying, "Oh, my…well….We never imagined this to be a children's event. It's really for ladies only and we can't accommodate children either with the menu or the physical set-up. I'm sure you understand that's why the invitation was to you alone." If someone pushes back, you have to be firm and say, "I'm sorry that we cannot include children. We hope you can get a babysitter so that you will be able to join us to celebrate with Stephanie." If 4 of you are hosting, then 4 of you can divvy up the responses as needed.
But you must agree on verbiage to use. No one can cave in if you have turned others down.

Yes, of course gifts should be opened at the shower. You can start during the luncheon if necessary if the bride gets through enough of her lunch to make it possible for her to start. Then she continues while the restaurant clears, serves dessert and pour coffee.

One theme I've seen several times is an "Around the Clock" shower - each guest is assigned a time of day or night (9 AM, noon, 5 PM, midnight, etc. - just create as many times as you have guests). The theme creates a sort of a game, but allows guests to choose very freely among the many gift choices. So people who get 11 PM or 1 AM can choose lingerie if they want (or luxury bath items, towels or anything else). You can make sure prudish or sensitive Aunt Shirley doesn't get one of those times if that's a concern. Others will wind up choosing a coffee maker or wine glasses or salt & pepper shakers or a picnic basket or whatever else is on the bride's registry or just something they want to give. It's not restrictive, because a coffee maker could easily be for 7 AM or 9 AM or 7 PM. It's really okay to pre-select some times for people if you know that someone has a gift in mind. The rest of the guests don't have to know! Then you keep a master list and just call off the times to have the bride open gifts in order, or you include a sticker or a hang tag that can be tied on the outside of the gift so that the time of day is obvious when the bridge chooses gifts randomly.

This provides a theme without you having to create special decorations. Yes, you can have a drawing for the centerpieces - give out a ticket or just draw names out of a hat. If you are giving out party favors (which you do not need to do), I've seen people put a sticker or tape a penny to the favor or even under the chair.

There's the standard "shower game" of collecting all the bows and ribbons to stick on, and through, a paper plate which is then used as the bouquet at the wedding rehearsal - something for the bride to carry and hand off to the maid of honor. It's not new, but a lot of people like it and consider it traditional. Assign someone at the shower to do this (provide paper plate, scissors, tape), and also assign someone with a pad and pen to record all the gifts and who they are from. Don't rely on cards not getting separated. Also have a special place for just gift cards - these things have a way of disappearing either because of dishonest wait staff (more common at weddings) or because they are so small. This is a huge service to the bride and something that's easy to delegate to someone other than the 4 of you hosting it.

Google wedding shower mad libs or wedding shower bingo. Makes watching the gift opening more enjoyable.

Best,
F. B.

I had a very large wedding shower and baby shower. We played a fun and easy game where you hand everyone a cheap paper plate and a pen or pencil. The game is that you have a few minutes to draw the bride and groom, or just bride in her dress, or mom and baby, etc. while the plate is ON TOP OF YOUR HEAD and you can't look! Then when time is up, the person writes their name on the back of the plate, they are collected, and the bride picks her favorite.

If you are giving away the center pieces, we always put a sticker of some sort taped under the plate at each table. Then whoever has the sticker at their table gets to take home the centerpiece. You could also do under the chair but that's cumbersome getting the chair turned over to see. Just make sure the staff doesn't clear the plates before you know who wins the centerpiece.

Three hours should be long enough but the key is to keep things moving. I have been to plenty of showers where you are sitting around forever then by the time they start to open the gifts you have already been there for 2 hours. So yes, open gifts, but keep things moving so people don't feel like they have to get up and go.

And I think simple wording like, "No children please" or "adults only please" should get the point across. Good luck.

Hi

Regarding the exclusion of children, it is ok to say this is an adult affair, no children allowed. If you don't want to use those words, google what is an appropriate way to say no kids allowed for other tactful ways. Regarding time, I think 3 hours is enough time to eat, have cake, open gifts and play games. Since there will be 4 of you hosting, everyone should be assigned certain responsibilities and having a time keeper should be one of them.

Since I have hosted a couple of baby showers, I would have a get together with all involved in the event and brainstorm ideas,themes, agenda, etc. That way, you won't be clueless come the event on what to do next. I think that when you have a few things going on instead of eat and open gifts it makes it inclusive and fun.

Here are some suggestions. I would probably give out a gift/giftcard to the 1st person to RSVP, play a game of who knows the bride. You would have to have an already prepared list of questions to ask prior to the event. Make sure to get the bride to answer them. Make it a little challenging like what elementary school and high school and college they attened, what's their favorite color, favorite movie, favorite restaurant, how many siblings do they have, what are their names, their parents name, where did they grow up, how did her and fiance meet? etc. You get the drift. How about the clothespin game. Pick maybe the bride or the groom's name as a forbidden name or maybe the word wedding, be creative. to say throughout the event. Everyone starts off with a clothes pin. Every time someone catches someone saying the forbidden name or word, they take their clothespin from them. Whoever ends up with the most clothespin gets a prize. This game is really fun because you can trick others into saying the word without them evening knowing. Bridal Advice Key. Cut out some tags with certain topics and have everyone their write how they would advice on the topic their tag says. I can go on and on. I would google bridal/wedding shower game ideas. There are many out there. Too many for me to name. Hope this helps..

Sounds like fun! It would never occur to me to bring kids to a shower. Do people really do this??

Regarding opening gifts. Everyone wants to see their gift opened but it's boring for everyone else. If this were me, I would avoid opening of presents there. It would utilize the entire time!

Three hours will fly by... I don't think you ll have time for games.. but the one that we do play is to put a sticker on the bottom of a plate(s) and whomever has the sticker, wins the flowers. it's fun and fast..
Also.. gosh, I wouldn't think you would need to tell people no kids. I mean IF I got an invite to a restaurant for a shower, which by the way I have gone to many at such places, in no way whatsoever would I think it's ok to bring my child. Seems like that should be common knowledge..
anyway.. when you address the invite, make it VERY specific to that one person............. we did that for our wedding (which we too could not afford to host all the children that people had at that time) we only had ONE family who listed they would bring BOTH of their kids.. and we simply and nicely had to say.. sorry, we can't afford to host the children... hey, this is your budget not those people who want to bring kids. in terms of that family who wanted to bring theirs.. well, they don't show and guess what.... they missed out on a BLAST.....................
it's not rude to NOT have children there.. be strong.... :)

If the bride is inviting 40 people, those are the 40 people being invited. If I was the one invited, I don't assume that my 8 year old can come along. Unless it's family (which always invites the kids).

You need to be specific in the addressing of the invitation (Jane Doe versus The Doe familiy or Jane and Janey . You could put a little note that says "please keep in mind that space is limited so we can not accommodate additional guests" or "adults only please".

As for games, you could do a gathering game such as a simple bridal word search just for fun. Then ask 10 questions about the bride or couple...have the bride answer at the same time and who ever gets the most right wins (people have to write their answers down and you read the bride's answers when the game is done) and then eat lunch. Then do gifts and play gift bingo that the guests can play while the gifts are opened. There are the two games for prizes and something to entertain guests while they are arriving.

I would only do a themed shower if she is specifically in need of just those things.

I never liked games. Every shower I have been to has had a pre-registry list at a store. 2 1/2 - 3 hrs is fine !

Have everybody bring 1 kitchen item---Glass measuring cup, toothpicks,
set of measuring spoons, etc....

Bring a photo of the bride and or groom to be and lay them out on a table ! Have people make a copy, so bride can take the copies home.

I would pass around a book and have the women write something cute about marriage in it --or what the bride has meant to the friend/relative

I think gifts should be opened---Other than that...It's eating !

-Adult Only. please

Age 18 and up, unless in the bridal party

Have women bring recipe on recipe card---enclose in invitation

-Let the gifts be anything the guests decide to give.
-You can be tactful about "no kids" by saying "Adults Only" at the bottom
of the invitation. People w/babies will hopefully be able to find someone
to watch their infant esp since it's at a restaurant. Diff if it's at a house.
-I would try to open gifts there since ppl like to see the guest of honor's
reaction. You can do this during cake/coffee towards the end. Not right
before your time at the restaurant is up buy maybe the last 30 mins.
-I wouldn't do games esp at a restaurant but you could do something easy
if you really want to like guess how many jelly beans in a baby bottle that
is also the centerpiece for a table, guess weight of baby at delivery with
winner to be announced later.
-3 hrs should be enough as you can take the last 45 mins for cake, one
game & gifts.

Be direct with the invitation by writing adults only but be prepared to get calls from people who think their special snowflake child should attend. You should allow infants (nursing moms find it easier). If you want pre teens then include them by name on the invite but don't invite 1 teen from a family and no one else.

One of the things we did at my niece's shower was we wrote words of wisdom for a happy marriage on pieces of paper. My sister in law made them into a book with pictures of the shower. She does scrap booking and it was really beautiful. We also made flowers which were included in the book too.

http://www.diva-girl-parties-and-stuff.com/bridal-shower-...
I used a pass along poem for my babyshower and it was a big hit. We played it soon after everyone arrived so it was a cute ice breaker since the tables were big and not everyone knew each other. The prize was the centerpiece (each table was different, some pretty plants, a Chrystal bowl, a snowman candleholder, garden statue, etc).We also played gift bingo, which kept everyone engaged when it wasn't their gift being opened. We
had a huge pile of small gifts-nice candy bars, umbrellas, coin purse, etc. so each time bingo was called they picked a small gift from the tray the hostess brought around and we kept moving.
I would just put adults only, please. on the invitation.
I honestly wouldn't attend a bridal shower that didn't include kids unless it was a very close friend or family member. Or if there was going to be some really fun adult entertainment. Otherwise it doesn't warrant a babysitter, IMO. Not sure why it's surprizing that ppl would bring kids. Kids are always included in my family. I would need to know if they weren't welcome.

A raffle is when a person BUYS a ticket for a chance to win. A DRAWING is where everyone gets a ticket free to win a prize. In Wisconsin raffles are very strictly controlled and you must have a license.
I'm not putting you down -- just clarifying for you.
Another way to do this would be to write a number on a piece of paper and place the paper under each place setting. Write a number on each center piece, the person who sits at the place with the matching number takes home the centerpiece.
Instead of games you can guests share a story about the bride or the bride and groom.

I had a large shower and we opened gifts in intervals. 5 or 6 at a time in between games, eating and everything else going on. It seemed to work out really well.
When I hosted a shower for my SIL we played a really fun games "what's in your purse" and you got certain points for having random items in your hand bad. Like a toy car, a mirror, flash drive, photo of your own mom, nail clippers, etc. It was really fun and different than most games. The guests really enjoyed. I have it if you'd like you can pm me. It can be done while gifts are being opened and other things are going on so it won't hold up the party, that's how we did it anyway.

I hate playing games at showers. I think they're silly. I love the idea of a door prize sort of thing but I would do one for each table for each decoration.

I don't care for the theme showers either. Unless it's a personal bridal shower for lingerie and toys and sexy stuff and fun. Then it's okay. But if it's a wedding shower the bride AND groom should both be there and their parents too.

If you have to clarify - "Adults Only please" is fine.

I love the idea of the sticker at bottom of plate (wins the centerpiece) and the gift bingo cards mynewnickname suggested. Fun and easy, and will keep the guests entertained while the bride to be opens gifts. That's all you need to do :)

I would open gifts.

Good luck :)