Wedding Question? - Atlantic City,NJ

Updated on May 23, 2011
S.T. asks from Atlantic City, NJ
12 answers

Hello,
I'm new to this web site, so far I love it very informative. My husband and I we're married in 2006( At our local courthouse). We wanted to have a small wedding next June at the beach(not sure which one, just a thought right now). We're excited but also very very nervous. Can you ladies please tell me where to begin? Do I start with location, budget, or guest? All advice will be of great appreciation. Thank you ladies.

p.s
What do you ladies think is a resonable amount for a wedding? Thank you

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

How sweet!
I'd do: budget, then location, then a guest list.
Then clothing, flowers, food, details, etc.

I definitely wouldn't register though....maybe request the presence instead of presents!?

Good luck!

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S.G.

answers from Boston on

Start with budget because you have to plan with what you can afford. Once you know what you can afford then it will help you determine venue, guest list, etc.

I didn't want a wedding and my husband wanted a large wedding. bleh. He wasn't bending on it until I took him out and showed him how much everything cost. Money talks with him! We compromised on a guest list with 50 people. Our wedding cost $10K and that includes venue (food and booze were inclusive of the venue fee), my dress, flowers for ceremony and reception, string quartet for ceremony, DJ for cocktail hour and reception, limo, my maid of honor's dress and best man's tux (we only had one person standing on each side) and our wedding rings. $10K might sound like a lot, but we worked for a year to pull that money together and it's an incredibly small fee for a wedding. Our honeymoon was another $5K.

Congratulations!

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S.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

Start with the budget. My wedding cost less than $2000, including the dress. We had 25 people attending.

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S.N.

answers from Minneapolis on

I'm sure it will be fabulous no matter what your budget or where you decide to have it ... one thing to consider - from your post you mention that you've been married for 5 years now - so this won't be a wedding but rather a renewal of your wedding vows only with a celebration this time (the party!)

This better represents what is occurring and will ease confusion for people ..... b/c they already think you're married right???! No gifts for a renewal though.... sorry about that one ;)

2 moms found this helpful

V.S.

answers from Charlotte on

Budget always comes first since you have to know how much to spend and what to leave out. Not to mention knowing what venue you can get with your budget.

After that, it's best to choose the location before starting on the guest list. Usually, people base the guest list on the size of the venue and who will be able to attend. From there, you can move on to the finer details such as the dress.

Congratulations!

P.S. I think the beach idea is great.

1 mom found this helpful
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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

Budget - and hit Half Price books or the library. I found a book called 1001 ways to save money and still have a fabulous wedding (or something like that). It was awesome. Enjoy, involve your friends - if some of them have talents, etc. to donate, ask them to make that their gift. I had one friend who was an amazing seamstress - she made my 3 bridesmaids dresses (simple summer dress pattern). Another bought the flowers (daisies for the bmaids, roses for me). It's just lovely when that kind of thing happens. Congrats and have fun!

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R.D.

answers from Kansas City on

Start with the dress! :) Congrats!!
(Well, the dress does have to fit within the budget, so maybe do that and decide how much of the budget you want to spend on the dress.)

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B.H.

answers from Philadelphia on

start with budget. we got married at my dads house and still spent a good bit - but there were a lot of guests and thats what hits ur budget hardest. im a wedding photographer now ( http://honeycuttphotography.shutterfly.com if ur interested!) but even at my wedding i knew the things that would last beyond our wedding day were the photos and video, so we invested in those. food gets eaten, flowers die, the dress is worn once and the tux gets returned, but ur photos and video will last forever!

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C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

Congratulations!!

ALWAYS!! Start with the budget. You need to know how much you can pay and be comfortable with.

My first wedding was in 1989 - I think my parents spent around $25K on it...200 people - the whole schbang! :)

My second wedding was in 1997...WE spent $15K and we only had 40 people at our wedding it was VERY intimate and we did what we wanted to do.

You usually need to plan a year out. So sit down and talk about money...how much can you really afford and what is HIS idea, not just YOUR idea....dream/goal, etc.

Once you have done that:
Location is next - destination wedding - are you paying for guests or what?
Dress - if you are doing a beach wedding - you will need to have a simpler dress - not a fru-fru dress (in my opinion)....
Catering.....if it's a location/destination wedding - they may make it all inclusive...

make a list - ask questions...
do they include a cake?
how many people do you plan on inviting?
Can and does the location have the space for the amount of people you want?
if it is outdoors, do they have a back up plan in case of inclement weather?
since you are already legally married - can you have your own officiant or do you have to use what they provide?
Do they give discounted rates for guests? if so - how many nights does the guest have to stay?
Do they have discounted packages for guests - i.e. - let's say you are going to Disney World and getting renewed there....will your guests want to make a vacation out of it?
If you decide to do a cruise wedding - can your guests afford it? if not - can you pay?
Invitations - even though it's a renewal - you still want people to know and come.....
flowers
brides maids - are you going to have any?
grooms men - again, Same as above....

set a time line to get things done. Talk to the place where you are having it - a catering manager or event planner will be able to help you with the little details as well...

1 mom found this helpful

L.!.

answers from Austin on

I echo the advice to figure out your budget and location before choosing your dress. After all, your dress should be appropriate for your location. For example, if you decide on a simple beach wedding, then a ballgown dress with train won't work in the sand... A church ceremony (with reception elsewhere) may not be the setting for a strapless gown. So figure out your location and then decide how elegant you, your husband and bridal party will dress.

And to mention, even on a tight budget, you can have an elegant wedding. One way is to have an early evening wedding followed by a champagne & dessert reception (and avoid the cost of feeding everyone dinner). Lunch is cheaper than dinner also. And weddings on Sunday morning/afternoon are cheaper than Saturday with an evening dinner reception. Also, people tend not to drink as much alcohol on Sunday morning/afternoon--and paying your your guests' drinks can get expensive.

So, think through your options and pick a dress that fits that scenario... Because you don't want it to look like you don't fit into the setting of your wedding--either because your dress is too fancy or too simple.

1 mom found this helpful

C.B.

answers from Kansas City on

awesome :) i would google "pensacola beach weddings". pensacola is in florida, it is less crowded and touristy, but super gorgeous. sugar white sand and beautiful water, on the gulf of mexico. no one i know who has been to the east or west coast thinks they hold a candle to the gulf, as far as beaches. good luck!

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K.I.

answers from Los Angeles on

I spent roughly $5K on my beach wedding.

That included a week long 4 bedroom beach house rental (right on the beach) , the clothes & dress, the cake, the flowers and the food, NOT the rings. We had a HUGE crab feast and it was spectacular! The man and I went and bought the crabs right off a boat the morning of, man was it delicious! I went with brightly colored (all different colors and patterns) napkins and we had a long table for our guests and a head table for us and we dumped the seafood right down the middle of the table (no plates), everyone had their own butter ramekins and crab crackers and I dumped handfuls of sea salt and seasonings periodically down the table...sprinkled it with cherry heirloom tomatoes and some broken pieces of baguettes, we had small sand castle making buckets for the discarded shell pieces ...we all ate with our hands...it was BEAUTIFUL! I bought one of those huge glass refreshment containers with a spout and filled it with water with orange and lemon and lime slices and we had wine in a wine bucket on a separate refreshment table. I got so many compliments on it, everyone took pictures and more than one person told me it looked like something out of a magazine spread!

~I had a total of 20 people at my lil' wedding. We ate early @ 5p and first (eating seafood with your hands is messy), then cleaned up got dressed, then had the ceremony-as closest to dusk as I could get but the sun sets really late in the summer time, my mom bought a huge roll/spool (sp?) of white thick plastic (thought this was gonna be tacky but it was perfect and we used that as a table cloth and a runner for the pathway of the ceremony,(such easy clean up) then had cake and drinks with all our favorite music playing in the background. We did up the deck in white twinkle lights and candles!

**The only thing we forgot was separate champagne glasses for the toast, darn it!

So EASY and so BEAUTIFUL!

1 mom found this helpful
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