I know this is an odd questions and may seem vain so please no rude comments. Back story is I am 5 weeks pregnant and my hubby just left for Iraq for a year. I just had a miscarriage before this pregnancy so I don't want family to know I'm pregnant yet. I really don't want them worrying about me being pregnant with my third while my hubby is gone, plus with the miscarriage I just want to be sure I keep this baby before telling everyone. So the problem is that there is a family baby blessing taking place soon....I will be 11 1/2 weeks by then and I'm worried about a baby pooch showing in a dress or a skirt. Is is safe to wear a girdle for just a couple of hours? I know I won't look huge, big and pregnant but I am a very skinny person and all my dresses and skirts are pretty tight like pencil skirts and stuff. I just don't know how I will look by then. plus my hubby's family is always thinking I'm pregnant and asking if I am so i know if they see a little extra in my tummy the questions will start flying. They live a ways a way so I wasn't worried about them finding out until now. And if I could just wear pants and a cute baggy shirt I wouldn't be worried about it, but I can't. And I thought maybe a girdle would be a better idea then a baggy dress cause for one I'm little and it would drowned me and two with a girdle I can wear it again after I have the baby until I shed all my baby weight. So what do you think? Can I wear one or will it hurt the baby?
I would like to thank everyone for your comments and ideas on how to got about this. I actually looked it up on line too and found some interesting info. I guess doctors say that while you are in your first trimester and your baby & uterus are still so small you can wear spandex shape wear without causing any harm to your baby. As long as you find one that isn't extremely too tight and doesn't have the wires, so just spandex. They say it's fine to smooth things out while you don't have a big round tummy and just want that pooch to lay flat. So I think I will just see how I look by then. If I feel like it's a little too noticeable I'm getting some spandex. :)
Some of you are wondering why I would want to keep it a secret for longer then 3 months? It's because I have two kids and this will be my third child and I will have him/her while my hubby is still in Iraq. I can just hear all the negative words from my in-laws like "Why would you want to get pregnant while he is gone?" "what if there is something wrong with the baby?" "how will you handle all 3 kids by yourself?" or even "I could never do it without my husband...you're crazy." So I thought if I wait until I have my ultra sound at 5months (remember they don't live close so I wasn't worried about having to see them until around then) then I could say "look here is the situation, the baby is healthy, I've been doing this on my own for 5 months...past all the morning sickness and me and family are doing just fine." I feel like this may take away from some of their worrying. And really maybe I won't wait that long but as of right now that is my plan.
Wear a maxi dress, with a hip little cropped cardigan. They are super cute, fashionable, and can hide that tummy! you can wear a belly band underneath to help with the tummy, and it isn't as constricting as a girdle. PLUS, the girdle would just pooch out and you could see the boning in it and be obvious anyways.
Hi,
Target and Forever 21 have some adorable, flowing, empire waist dresses for about the same price as a girdle and you could wear it into the 2nd trimester and post baby. They are in the junior department and cut for tiny people. Both my daughter and I are thin and they look great
Good luck and be well.
j
I would not wear one you may want to get some panty hose and cut the legs off. They will give you some control, but not feel so tight.. To tell you the truth,anything too tight may make you feel ill. I remember I did not know I was pregnant for for a while and even wearing control top panty hose made me nauseous.
Also you may want to find some higher waisted panties to also give you a little more control.. Check out Penney's..
Hi Andrea,
I am moaning at just the *thought* of wearing a girdle at 11.5 weeks... oooh! do you have a uterus of steel or what? (LOL)
On a more serious note, I've had a miscarriage, and totally understand you not wanting to "reveal" too early. However, by 12 weeks (depending on your personal medical issues), my understanding is you are pretty safe, and pretty much going to "show" one way or the other. (I was about there with my 2nd pregnancy, was NOT "showing" but about 3 or 4 women who know me could tell by looking at my face that I was pregnant!!!)
Maybe the baby blessing will be the perfect time to let everyone know, and be open about asking friends and family for support and understanding in NOT making a big deal until you feel like the danger is past?
Hey, good luck :)
t
I don't think it's vain to want to keep nosy family out of your business until it's your decision to fill them in. I would opt for getting maybe a belly band- it's just a lycra band but that might provide enough of the suck in effect without being uncomfortable. It wouldn't be an issue for your baby unless your talking about sinching your hips and stomach in really tight like a corsette. I have to wear a type of girdle with my pregnancies to keep my hips together-and it's pretty tight and recommended by my dr so it shouldn't be a problem that early :). Also you may not be showing as much as you'd think by that point. technically your baby is still only like two inches long at that point and still nestled neatly in your pelvis. Good luck! hope it all goes well. ***and thank you for your husband's service! I appreciate the freedoms we enjoy because of your direct sacrifice. Thank you***
i wouldnt wear one. i would go and purchase a really nice a line type dress that is fitted up under your chest and then flows away from your body. dont buy a baggy dress, buy an a line type or even a dress out of chiffon that is flowy. there are a ton of ways to hide it. i wore all kinds of clothes and people couldnt even tell i was preggers till almost 6 mos. like you i am thin, so if i had been wearing specific types of clothes you could have seen it earlier
Yes you can! I'm glad you did some research. :)
I too have been in the situation of not wanting people to know about my pregnancies until I was ready to share. With more that the average number of children some of the comments get...uh, interesting. While it's true that it's none of anyone's business, it doesn't make them any less hurtful.
I tend to not show for a while, except for a bloated/poochy look which is just not cute-and then the rumors start flying. Sounds like you understand that!
I have gotten the thumbs up from more than one OB and a midwife on the spandex girdles. You would want to avoid one on that has the boning-type wire in it, but something that is like Spanx is perfectly fine!
Besides, at 12 weeks, baby is roughly 2 1/2 inches long and though your uterus has grown at that point, it is typically just starting to be big enough come up out of your pelvis; the growth you have at that point is your organs shifting around and moving up and bloating-it's not the baby poking out!
Good Luck-I hope you are able to tell people on your own time in your own way, and that they are supportive!
I have always read that it is bad to wear tight clothing and restrict your stomach while you were pregnant. I'm not sure what a few hours would do, but I wouldn't want to chance it. I would definitely ask your doctor about it. If you explained the situation, I'm sure they would be able to give you great medical advice on the matter without judgment. It's better to be safe than sorry! Good luck with your family either way and congratulations!!
Let the inlaws think what they will. It isn't their business. Do not be ashamed of your pregnancy. What will be will be.
No, no - please don't wear a girdle. The musculature around the uterus needs blood flow to feed the baby. Wearing a girdle will seriously restrict it. By 12 weeks you are out of the woods and you should be able to share with the family the day before so that they can all congratulate you the day off. Just so the focus is not shifting from the actual celebration.
Good luck, I am sure you will do what's best. Take care and enjoy your little one growing inside you. I've had my 3 and I don't plan on any more, what a great feeling that used to be. God Bless you.
No.
If anything, you should ask your OB/GYN...
To me you will be nearly 12 weeks and out of the woods, so to speak, so why not share with your family at this blessing??
Seems like the perfect time.
I sense there are some other reasons for not wanting to tell, so instead of hiding it with anything, perhaps you need to address that.
congrats on the baby and don't be afraid to tell the world!
I'm definitely NOT an expert but I would think that a girdle might restrict some blood and or oxygen flow to one or both of you. I don't think I would take the risk. Since you have some time maybe you can just shop around for a while and find some cute longer, flowy top with a tighter maternity skirt so your tummy won't show. Also, by then you will almost have your 1st trimester under your belt (literally) and you may feel more comfortable about telling people. (Or I guess you could just ask your doctor:))
I'm sorry about your miscarriage. I went through that also. Best of luck to you with your pregnancy and thank you to your husband!
As for whether it could hurt the baby, I'm not a medical expert, but I can tell you that my in mother's generation, nearly everyone wore a girdle through pregnancy. My mom was (comically) amazed that she couldn't find me a maternity girdle when I was pregnant. (Why she thought it was her place to get me such a thing to begin with is a whole other story...)
If you're worried about the girdle, why not use a belly band? They're available, and not controversial. I used an elasticized one when I was pregnant for back support, and my Asian friends use long swaths of cloth wrapped around. And if you wear a straight cut sheath dress (still chic, but not curve-hugging) to the baby blessing, that plus a belly band may be camouflage enough to protect your secret a little longer.
I do wonder, though, if you have thought through what will happen when everybody does find out. I can understand, especially after a miscarriage, wanting to make sure this pregnancy has "taken" before letting everybody know. But if you wait much past the 3 month mark, you may inadvertently hurt the feelings of those who would like to celebrate and support you. And believe me, I do know that in some families the line between "supportive" and "meddlesome" is a fine line, or a non-existent one. (See section on girdle above.)
I would not wear a girdlle while pregnant. I would be worried about hurting the baby.
If they are always thinking you are pregnant just respond the way you do when you are not. If you buy an empire waist dress it will be fitted on top and right under your breasts the waist starts so it will hide anything.
just wear loose clothing or something that would not let you show. do not harm your baby just for the sake of what others might think! they will eventually learn you are pregnant anyway... whatever damage may happen to your baby for compressing him will last for the rest your both and even worse, his life. for example, something happens right when his nervous system is being formed. are you willing for your kid to have a brain problem? learning disability, ect
