A.R. asks from Delphi, IN on July 07, 2007
Weaning My Daughter..
I have nursed my daughter since she was born. She is 10 1/2 months old. Nursing is definitely a comfort to her when she is tired. She is a complete mama's girl. I am really nervous about weaning her. First, I don't want to do it if she really isn't ready. I am scared about the engorgement too. I had only planned on nursing for her first year. It is really hard for me to not nurse her sometimes. I have cut down on feedings because she is good with formula from a sippy cup. She has never taken a pacifier and doesn't suck her thumb, which honestly I think is good, but like I said the only thing she has to comfort her when she can't go to sleep or is so upset that she can't calm down is the boob. I know that isn't good and I have been working on it, but she won't calm down and will cry and cry and not stop! I break down and nurse her. I'm not sure what to do. I really don't want to nurse her for a whole lot longer. She needs to learn to calm down on her own and that I can't be around all the time for her. I need a desperate break sometimes!!! Can anyone help me?
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A.D. answers from Huntington on July 28, 2007
Usually they are not ready to give up that vomfort zone until they hit about 12 months. Then once they hit that age you start giving them a bottle with milk in a couple of times a day. In my experience it is the closness that they crave, so as long as you give them this bottle still holding them close to you, then it is a little easier for them to make the adjustment.
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J.V. answers from Fort Wayne on July 08, 2007
If I were you, I would not wean. Your daughter is still a baby! She is not ready to give up her comfort and her excellent source of nourishment. Also, there is NO reason to feel guilty about using the breast as comfort. A 10 month old is too young to comfort their self. They need the parents around to comfort them and hold them, that is how young learn to trust! I know it can feel as though you can never get a break while nursing (I am nursing a 15 month old myself), but take comfort in the excellent start you are giving your baby. Also in the scheme of things, the 12-24 months one nurse their young is a very short time. Take this opportunity to comfort and teach your little one that you are there for them when they are upset, tired, scared and happy. Don't listen to what naysayers tell you, nursing your baby for the first two years is optimal. Your child will not turn out spoiled, just loved and confident.
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J.D. answers from Fort Wayne on July 08, 2007
Hi A., I too had this same problem when my baby boy was about the same age, I was so confused, first I was angry at all the comments my friends and family thought they should make(how long ya gonna do that or just quit already). Second, I know this is my last child and I am a stay at home mom and why should I have to stop nursing if 'I' don't want to. My son is now 16 months old and I still nurse him for his nap and bedtime and a couple night nursings(I am more of a human pacifier). I have come to realize that I don't care what people say or think, I don't whip out my boob anywhere I nurse him in private unless at home. I got a lot of negative comments on here when I posted my problem, some people were helpful too, my only suggestion is do what 'YOU and your baby' want to do as long as you're comfortable. I hope everything goes well for you guys, let me know how things go. =)
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A.H. answers from Indianapolis on July 08, 2007
Is there a reason you need to wean her? I know that the World Health Orginization now recomends breastfeeding until the age of 2. (sorry didn't know if you knew that)
I just weaned my daughter and there are a few ways you can do it. Slowly or just quit cold turkey. We quit cold turkey pretty much and I didn't have any problems with engorgement. it was hard at first but my daughter eventually took the bottle with no problems. We had a rough week when I started putting her to seep without nursing. It took a while just trying to snuggle with her and keep her calm. It was hard for me emotionally but after about a week it was fine. If she is already subbing with formula then the engorgement shouldn't be bad for you.
Good luck :)
A.
A.D. answers from Huntington on July 28, 2007
Usually they are not ready to give up that vomfort zone until they hit about 12 months. Then once they hit that age you start giving them a bottle with milk in a couple of times a day. In my experience it is the closness that they crave, so as long as you give them this bottle still holding them close to you, then it is a little easier for them to make the adjustment.
J.D. answers from Lexington on July 09, 2007
My daughter is 11 1/2 months old and I still nurse her before her afternoon nap and before bed and first thing in the morning and when/if she gets up in the middle of the night. I did the same thing with my son who is now 2 1/2 yrs old. I slowly started giving up feedings at 6 months of age and would give formula instead. with my son I gave him a sippy cup sooner than my daughter but that's only because she just recently decided to accept the sippy cup. I haven't had any problems with engorgement because it's been such a slow process. I was ready to give up the daytime feedings so I would have a little more freedom but I haven't given up the others due to pure laziness. It's just so easy now. I had planned on only doing the night time feedings by now but again laziness strikes and I haven't done it. As for feeling like the human pacifier that's how it felt with my son...my daughter not so much. but with him I would just hold him close and sing to him and rock him..It took a while but it worked. When I knew there wasn't anything wrong he was just tired then I let him cry it out in his bed. It was rough but it was the only thing that worked.
Good Luck...just do what you feel good about and it will all work out
S.C. answers from Fort Wayne on July 07, 2007
I'm also in the process of weaning my daughter. She's almost 5 mos old and has started to gnaw on my nipples while feeding. I'm pretty sure she's getting teeth. I decided that it was time. When she gets really upset, I pass her off to her daddy or whomever else happens to be around at the time. If she's eating, she'll finish her bottle and is fine. If she's not eating, I ask them to give her the paci and pace with her. She loves to be walked around. Normally it works. Also, try a blanket between her hands when you lay her down. It helps my daughter to have something to snuggle with. HTH
D.T. answers from Muncie on July 07, 2007
My little girl is turning a year this August too (the 12th). She weaned on her own at about 5-6 months. She just found everything going on around her more interesting. I didn't have much pain or engorgement. I would recommend if you do to pump until you are comfortable again, don't fully pump yourself empty. As for weaning at bed time, I would offer my daughter the breast until she got drowsy then unlatched her and popped in the pacifier. She now only uses the pacifier for bed, I don't want her to get dependent on it. After a bit just let her lay against your chest in the feeding position but only give her the pacifier. That way she has your scent and your softness to nuzzle but no nursing. I did this and I'm now able to give my girl a couple of kisses hand her the pacifier and lay her in bed and leave her for the night. It's working for naps too. I hope this works for you too.
T.S. answers from Lexington on July 07, 2007
I recently weaned my daughter at 14mos because we are pregnant again.... I found that just taking it a step at a time was best. I started with one feeding and then when she didn't seem to mind that one being gone I would take another one. The hardest one was bedtime, but I just rocked her and would sing a song or something and after the first two days she was fine. She would never take a paci but started after I weaned her, but thats ok....it can go around two. Just remember, you can do whatever you find that works and makes it as stress free for you and the baby. I find now that some days she is so restless that the only thing that helps to get her to sleep is to lay down with her until she is out. Even if you aren't able to get her to be able to calm herself down yet, maybe there is just something else you can do to help with out the boob, like a walk around the house or a song. My daughter found itsy bitsy spider very soothing because you can move you hands and there is something to watch.
Good luck though, you'll figure it out and everything will be fine.
T.
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