Weaning My 24-Month Toddler from Breastfeeding

Hi G.,
I weaned my son at 12 1/2 mos., so this may or may not work for you. I had put my son to sleep every night as I breastfed him and it just fit into his nightly routine. So, on the day we knocked out that last feeding for the final time, I had my husband go thru the motions of bedtime. This way, my son did not smell me or see me. We did the same thing when trying to get him to sleep thru the night. My husband went in every single time.
I hope this helps! Best of luck!!

Does your son drink milk? Are you against giving him a night time bottle for awhile? My son transitioned without anything with only a few tough nights. My daughter wouldn't go for it, but was ok having a bottle instead.
K.

Hi,
We just went through this with our two year old. I tried about two months before her birthday, and got lots of tears and screaming so I, too, gave in. I had a lot of anxiety about it and I think she felt that too. So after we went back to nursing, we talked a lot about her upcoming bday and being a big girl and all the things she can do that babies can't (eat food, walk, talk...drink from a cup...etc.) I kept telling her when she turned two there wouldn't be anymore milk. This may have been helpful but I think the thing that really worked was I put a new thing in place of her b/f time at night (stories and songs in the bf chair). But I moved her nursing time to another time (random) in the day. I gave it to her another time and said, "you get boo-boo one time today and it's now..." and then at night when she asked I said, "you already had boo-boo today and you can have it tomorrow again, but now we are doing stories and songs." She was ok with that. Over two weeks she forgot about the daytime one and was used to going to sleep without it and eventually went about five days before she even asked for it. We had one meltdown over boo-boo (it was on her bday party and she was going for her nap and was sooo excited and wound up for the party that she suddenly decided she wanted boo-boo). But those are the only tears we've had. She still talks about it, but I tell her now it hurts mama because she is so big and there is no more milk in there and when mommy has another baby her body will make more milk since only babies drink boo-boo.
All I can really say is go with your gut. I thought I was ready a few months ago, but neither she nor I really were. Once I was really ready to be over it, we did it with no tears. yay!

I am going to make a suggestion to all the moms going through this.

First of all, God bless you all for being able to. I had to give up breast feeding at 3 months. I did not want to but my daughter never properly learned to latch on (1 month early).

Anyway, I wanted to show a little concern about a before bedtime cup of milk. I worked at the dental society and one thing that will always stick with me is baby bottle tooth decay. They have the teeth, so you need to take care of them for them. I would like to suggest introducing water in a cup or bottle, sippy or regular. I agree that it is wonderful that you can still feed naturally, but instead of milk before bed, start substituting water.

Just a thought. Again, God bless you all for what you have been able to give your children. I praise you all for your ability to give so freely to your children.

I nursed my dd until 34 months. She was not happy to give up nursing! We talked about it alot, for a couple of weeks, I did the same routine at bedtime, except added her favorite story, ad lib, from me when all the lights were out. One night she left her room crying and found daddy and he told her the same story and she went to sleep.
It was not easy, for three nights she cried and broke my heart. But I made the decision and couldn't go back or it made it worse for her and prolonged her going to sleep because she held out. it took about an hour, then 1/2 hour and the third night was the worst, I think it was her last big stand. Then On the fourth night, she actually was down in 10 minutes with no crying. It was hard, but now she is used to it and we have a new routine, using dad really helps too.
Good luck!

i JUST weaned my 26 month old (three days ago). it has gone great! the difference i think is that i would do bath, story, BOTTLE then breast and she'd fall asleep. so after the bottle, she's really sleepy, and when she starts going for the boob i just stand up and hold her to my chest while patting her back, and she falls asleep.

i think the most important thing is to decide. once you've decided there's no more, tell him so, and stick to it. the fridge is empty, period.

goos luck! you can do it! (by the way, good for you for nursing till 2! you gave your child a wonderful gift!)

I weaned my son at 21 months and he did not want to stop either. Someone suggested that I put bandaids on my nipples at the times he was used to nursing and explain to him that my nipples are soar and hurt when I nurse him so I need bandaids to protect them. He was very sympathetic and even when he was tired and was falling asleep or waking up and wanting the reassurance of breastfeeding, he would see and feel the bandaids and remember. We transitioned to cuddling instead so he didn't feel abandoned and he was fine with that alone within a couple days. I wore the bandaids for about a week and then didn't need them anymore. Good luck!

J.

I weaned my son at night when he was 22 months old (he just turned 2 today and still nurses in the am when he wakes) I had my mom and my husband alternate putting him down for 1.5 weeks. I told him I had to go out to the store, take a shower- whatever. They had a milk substitute for him to sip while they read a story. We opt for rice milk or hemp milk , but whatever your choice, have it offered to replace your milk.

This worked for us. I utilized a lactation consultant who made these recommendations and they worked! Good luck!

Hi G.. This is hard and I feel for you. I weaned my first at 18 months and my second at age three because she fought me on it the entire time. I applaud you for sticking it out for this long because kids actually have the need to suckle for brain development until age four and most people don't last past six months. I went to a silicone nipple on a small bottle filled with water and gave it to my kids in their beds overnight (water only since juice rots the enamel on their teeth). I always laid down with them when I nursed at night and then transferred them to their cribs so my routine was different than yours. I still laid down and cut down the time of nursing over a months time so that it wasn't cold turkey for the child. Nursing provides a child with much more than sustenance when you nurse only at night and they are giving up comfort and an intimate tie with you and since you work full time, this is really important one and one time with you and only you. Good Luck. You sound like a great mom.

My sure fire way...worked with both kids...was to really run them around and tire them out.
They were so tired they fell right to sleep. We did for 3 nights in a row and that and Was it
Regardless of the stratagy, you will need to work through any "rough patches" for a few night, so prepare yourself!
Good luck...

G.,

Congrats for nursing for this long. I am in the same exact boat that you are. My son will be two in Sept, but he is still nursing 4 times a day. I had got him down to 3 times, but then he got his first molars and I gave in and nursed after nap (which had been the first to go). I know that he is using me as a pacifier and when he is teething all he wants is my breasts. He is teething right now and he was literally at my breasts for almost a total of 4 hours today. I will be using some of the strategies that the other mommies recommended. I really need my son to fall asleep on his own and he is going to fight it. You sound like a wonderful mom and you are giving your son such a great start. Hang in there and thanks for asking the question that was on my mind tonight. :)

Hi G.,

My daughter is 22 months and I can't image her going to sleep without breast feeding! I've read the other mommy's replies and now have some ideas of how to wean our little one. Thank you for asking the question!

I wanted to say, don't feel bad for "giving in". I think it's important to remember that it's a relationship between two people, even though our children are small. If your son is that upset, then maybe it's not time to wean or another approach is needed. Or perhaps he feels that you are not completely ready, either. But I commend you for listening to your son's needs, and don't feel badly for taking a break and not forcing the issue.

Our daughter goes to sleep easily with our babysitter (at least that's what she tells us!), so I would guess that if someone else can help put your son to sleep, that might be a good solution.

Good luck! I know we should wean soon, too. I was hoping to just make it to one year, but I honestly don't think I'M ready to wean yet even at 22 months!

H.

I haven't tried this yet, but my son is nursing at 25 months and we are thinking about weaning too, and I read that this method sometimes works. Sit with him on your lap at bedtime and tell him you're going to count to 100 and then he can nurse. Cuddle him and count softly, and the idea is that over time they'll fall asleep while you count.

Another idea that might work is rewarding him somehow for getting in bed without nursing. My son always had to fall asleep nursing, but I was really ready to just tuck him in and say goodnight. So we started bringing him a raisin (his favorite) as a reward for staying there quietly for 1 minute, then we stretched it out longer and longer until he fell asleep waiting for the next raisin. He still asks for a treat sometimes when he goes to bed, but for the most part he cooperates and goes right to sleep. Turning it into a game with a reward made the transition much less stressful for him.

I feel for you, it just breaks your heart when they cry like that for milk! Good luck!

I've gone through the weaning process with four of my kids, 3 were older than your son 1 was younger (but she pretty much quit in her own). We have used mant tactics, all gradual. I usually start reducing the amount of time during the session by singing a song or counting (you pick the song or how high). My second daughter wanted some contorl so I counted to 10 she picked whether in English or Spanish. Over several weeks I went from very slow to about a one minute session. To finaly give that up we went to the toy store and picked out a present, not too big but enough to be meaningful. We had it wrapped and then talked about a weaning party. We set a date and talked about how she was growing up and getting bigger and wouldn't need nur-nurs anymore. On the day we made a cake, played big girl games, looked at her baby pictures and she got her present (a Unicorn puppet) which at 6 1/2 she still refers to fondly as her "I'm a weaned" present. Each child got a weaning party and it helped cement the idea for them. We still ahd requests later but it seemed to work. They were all closer to 3 though. I also told them we could have as many snuggles as they wanted.
H.

Hi G.,
I nursed my son until 26 mos. I think it is awesome that you nursed him for so long!!! To wean my son at night I had to employ my husbands help. If your husband is available try having him run through the bedtime routine instead of you. It took about a month of my husband filling in for me before I could put him down without him asking to nurse. Good luck!
S.

You may have to resort to another person to put your son to bed. He can't expect daddy-o to feed him breastmilk for instance. Once he realizes he won't get anywhere, the crying should subside. When he sees he can go to sleep without the breast, when he does see you, it should become easier and don't give in once he's slept without it!!! Pick a day that he's really tired from play and sleep will come easy.

I weaned my daughter from nighttime nursing (the last to go) when she was 14 months old and just like ur son, she would cry until she got to nurse! I believe it was more for comfort than anything else. Since my parents were willing to help and stay with us during this time, I let her sleep between grandma and grandpa in their room for a few days. She was excited about the new arrangement and though she initially would ask for mommy to nurse, they would distract her and put her to sleep. By the 5th night, she had forgotten what nursing was!
I plan to use a pacifier with my son this time around!

I saw that a few others mentioned daddy. I recommended having him do the bedtime routine. Tell your son that its a big boy activiity that only boys get to to do. Not having you around and thinking he gets to be the big boy with daddy worked for my son. Good luck!

Hi G.,
My daughter was about the same age as your son when I decided it was time to let the before bed nursing go. We did it gradually by reducing the time -- the first week I stopped at 20 minutes, the second at 15 minutes, the third at 10 minutes, etc. Eventually we just let it go. This seemed to work well for us.

Good luck, B.

One has to make up their mind before they can convince a child that is what is going to happen. When you give in, you are teaching him that if he keeps screaming and being upset, you will give in. It was so difficult for me to take my oldest off his last bed time bottle on his 2nd birthday. Doctors said "2 years old off the bottle" back in the 1960's. So I sat with him while he drank a glass of milk before he went to bed. That way he had the milk he was used to and I felt better. What about giving him a tippee cup of milk before he goes to bed so he can have his milk. Yes, it is not breast feeding but it is time for him to grow up because this is your decision for him.
F.

Dear G.,
Weaning can be really tough. My daughter weaned herself way before I was ready and then there was my son who loved the boobie. We planned to nurse until he was 18 months and take it from there. I had to go into the hospital when he was 15 months and the medication they gave me prior to my operation would have harmed him if I nursed so it was a matter of safety that I didn't cave in. He wasn't really very happy about it and for a couple of days, I couldn't even hold him because he would try to yank my shirt up. My husband and daughter were a huge help with keeping him distracted. I was in the hospital for four days so by the time I got home, he was over it and we could go back to cuddling. It was as if he'd completely forgotten about the breast issue.
I know it's hard, but you're already down to only night time nursing so if you're committed to weaning, just stick with it. And don't give in because you'll just have to start all over again. I know of someone who put band-aids on her nipples and said her boobies had owies and that worked for her.
Best of wishes!