Weaning Advice?

J.,

You are already in the process of natural weaning, so why are you setting an artificial calendar date for "completion?" If you are patient, you will find that the middle nursing is likely to disappear, especially if you cuddle and read a book together until he goes to sleep. In a short time, the morning nursing will fade until it is just the night one, and with less demand, you will produce less milk. Finally, there will be hardly any milk at night, and then you can pick a time to say, "We don't do that anymore." You are just a little early on the curve.

I commend you for nursing your son--it is one of the best gifts you can ever give him.

Best wishes,
K.

Not much to add to all this advice except....try yogurt, cheese, broccoli, etc for sources of calcium and D. Also, my son LOVES!!!! vanilla flavored soy milk. He starts yelling and clapping when we approach it at the grocery!! He is a bit over 2 and still has his "ba ba" at night and I think about weaning every night but just can't bear to take it away from him yet 'cause he loves it so. :) Also, right now he's sick w/ chicken pox and so it's providing even more of a comfort.

Wean when you can and try to enjoy it until then, that's what I say!!

Good luck to you!
L.

Hi J.,

Congratulations on giving your son (and yourself) the amazing gift of breastfeeding - the longer you nurse your son, the more the protective affect for you and him (decrease in cancer rates for both mom & baby over the long haul!). I know it might seem like your son is nursing "solely for comfort" but if he's getting ANY milk from you at all, he's still benefitting from the immune factors in your milk, even at 15 months old:

"Some of the immune factors in breastmilk have been shown to increase in concentration as the baby gets older and nurses less, so older babies still receive lots of immune factors. So as a baby starts to nurse less (weaning) and milk supply decreases, the concentration of immunities increases. This isn't age-dependent, but depends on the amount of milk that baby is removing from the breast. [source: Goldman AS et al. 'Immunologic components in human milk during weaning.' Acta Paediatr Scand. 1983 Jan;72(1):133-4.]"
http://www.kellymom.com/nutrition/milk/immunefactors.html

Also, about your son not being too interested in cow's milk, please don't be terribly concerned by this, especially since he's still nursing 3-4 times a day - this is more of a cultural habit (to feel like we "need" to drink cow milk to be healthy) than it is a nutritional necessity:

"Many nursing moms are told that they must introduce cow's milk at a year. Your nursing toddler is already getting the best milk he can get - mother's milk! Breastmilk has a higher fat content than whole cow's milk (needed for baby's brain growth), and all the nutrients of human milk are significantly more bioavailable (easily absorbed) than those of cow's milk because it is species specific (not to mention all the components of mother's milk that are not present in cow's milk).

There is no need for additional milk or (or the equivalent nutrients from other foods) as long as your baby is nursing 3-4 times per day. Cow's milk is really just a convenient source of calcium, protein, fats, vitamin D, etc. - it's not required. There are many people in many parts of the world who do not drink milk and still manage to get all the calcium, protein, fats, vitamin D, etc. that they need."
http://www.kellymom.com/nutrition/solids/toddler-foods.ht...

Now about weaning... :) From your request I can't quite tell how you feel about weaning your son, so I'm not sure how to respond. I'd be supportive of whatever your feelings are, but my suggestions about "how to wean" would probably change depending on your current feelings towards your son's nursing right now. It would help to know things like... Is weaning something you're asking about because you think you're supposed to be done by now? Do you have strong feelings either way, or are you ambivalent about weaning? For example, are you going nuts and can't wait to stop nursing? Or are you fine with continuing to nurse as things are right now? Or do you like nursing still but would be happier if there were only 1 or 2 nursing sessions a day?

However you're feeling, you have lots of options. :) For your physical comfort (lemme tell ya, clogged ducts, breast infections, mastitis? NOT fun - recommend avoiding them!) as well as that of your son's physical and emotional comfort, a gradual weaning plan of some sort that has some flexibility built into it (allowing for a break from the weaning schedule in the event of illness or major life changes) can make weaning a really pleasant, sweet experience for both mom and baby. You can do partial weaning - like eliminating one nursing (for example, night weaning or perhaps you just aren't loving that morning nursing anymore... slowly cutting that out). Or you can gradually shorten the time of each nursing session ("you can nurse for as long as the ABC song") or you can set up something like a special nursing light (that only you can turn off and on) and explain to your son that you guys can only nurse when the light is on (and help him set his expectations - will that be the 3-4 times a day? or are you only going to do it before sleep?). There are *many* other clever ideas out there for gradual weaning from the breastfeeding relationship.

Some other great links on weaning your breastfed baby:
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/weaning/weaning-partial.html
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/weaning/how_weaning_happens.html

Personally, we went through several stages of weaning. At one point I night weaned her gradually with the help of my husband (maybe 14-18 months old?), and then over time I remember saying to myself "I still enjoy nursing when it is 3 times a day or less" so I think we made a rule to only nurse in one, specific, special chair that I chose to go sit in (although I did try to be respectful of her wanting to nurse and would try to make her needs and mine coincide - otherwise I played the Big Distraction Game! like "want a snack? let's play chase" etc.). And finally I remember being somewhat surprised when my daughter actually weaned completely because it was such a gradual process that she eventually was nursing only once every other day (or skipping a few days in between) and only for a very short minute or two... so the last time she nursed, I wasn't aware that would be The Last Time! I was pregant with my 2nd child at the time and she was almost not quite 2.5 yrs old. And now she's almost 4 yrs old (already!) and it feels like ages ago that she ever nursed... Ahh, treasure the time because it really, truly flies!

Best of luck to you, and again, it's so wonderful to hear of a mom/baby pair who has had such a successful breastfeeding relationship. I hope weaning is a pleasant experience for you both!

The advice that I've read sounds good. The only thing that I would add while weaning your son, would be a 2nd stage formula. This type of formula is designed for 1-2 year olds so they can receive the calcium they need; especially if they don't like cows milk.

Good Luck to you.

Wow! I have to say that your "about me" sounds like me almost to the 'T'!! I am 27 years old SAHM with a 16 month old that I weaned at 15 1/2 months. I am the mother of my son and my 4 year old jack russell (he was the baby first!). I also married my highschool sweetheart (married 7 years in July) and have been with him for 12 years!! Crazy!

Anyway, about the weaning. I was in a very similar situation as you not so long ago. My son just LOVED to nurse. Here's what I suggest: take away one of those feedings per week -- it will only take a few times for him to realize what's going on. Do you rock your son to sleep or put him in the crib awake?? Either way, he will fight you the first couple of times, but if you really want to be done, then you have to be strong. Offer him his cup with whatever drink he prefers in it and if he's thirsty he'll drink, if he's not, he won't. Good luck and congratulations for making it this far!!

Hi J., My son was just over 15 months when he was weened. I was in the same boat as you. I started to cut the morning feedind by simply putting him in his highchair for breakfast. After doing that he wouldn't ask for me to nurse. Then I cut the before nap by cuddling on the rocking chair in his room. I faced him away from me to help resist the temptation. After that one I did the same thing before bed. It might take a couple weeks but keep trying and be persistant. My son is now 22 months and just started likeing milk. I get calcium fortified apple juice and he eats pretty good. Hang in there it will all work out. Please feel free to e-mail me if you have any questions!!!

C.

My friend weaned her two and a half year old daughter over a weeks time. She did it very gently. First she wrote simple book about her daughters relationship with her "B's" as she calls them. It talked of how they have grown up together and how they have nurished her and soothed her. Then it went on to talk about how some day her "B's" might not taste too good, but how it would be alright because she would still have mommy to sooth nourish and comfort her. And that mommy would always be there for her no matter what.

So they read the book for a week, every day. They talked about it and when she fed my friend would ask her daughter if they taste bad? She would say "No they taste goooooood." Then after a week my friend put on some natural oil, I forget what kind, but you can use anything that is digestible that you know doesn't taste good. When her daughter went to nerse she stopped looked funny and said I try the other one. That one too was not good and they talked about it and that was that. No more breast feeding.

I think she tried some other times that day, when she would normally do so, like if she was upset or before a nap. Every time they would have that oil on them and taste bad though, so I guess it took a full day of experimenting before she realized they were not good anymore.

Seemed like a good idea to me if you can do that.
Just a suggestion. I forget what kind of oil she used, but you can aska physician what they might suggest.