12 answers

Weaning a 13 Month Old

I have always thought that I would nurse my daughter until she was a year and then slowly wean her to AM and PM feedings only. I would like to be done nursing all together when she is around 15 months old. She is completely against my plan! The way things are going right now I feel like she may be nursing when she is 5!!!

I have been trying to reduce daytime feedings slowly, but she is not having it. Yesterday when I tried to offer a sippy cup of milk instead of nursing she threw a temper tantrum for close to 20 minutes.

She will drink milk and juice from a cup too, but she would prefer to nurse. She will even sit next to me and try to lift up my shirt.

Does anyone have any ideas for me or book suggestions?


What can I do next?

Featured Answers

I am in the same boat any advice you get would be great to hear. It has helped us when my son gets sippy cups for sleep from grandma or daddy.

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Jessica, Something similar happened to me. After months of nursing and bottle feeding with expressed milk, my son decided he would only nurse. We did what our pediatrician recommended, and as painful as it was, it did work. My husband gave our son the bottle. He didn't want it and really cried. But finally he took the bottle after 20 minutes. He was hungry. I nearly ruined it by coming into the room to see if I could help -- that made matters worse -- I was what he wanted. Can you have your husband bottle/sippy cup feed her when he is home?

1 mom found this helpful

She's use to the nipple, so I can see why she turns her nose up o the sippy cup. At this age, she is already established her stubborn side, so it might be best if you give her no other option but the cup or bottle. If you give in to her each time, she wins. The kids can't control us. When I was trying to get my daughter to drink from the cup, it was hard. I kept putting it infront of her and she had no other options. There was no more bottle. She went for 2.5 days before actually drinking it. I was concerned and asked the pediatrician about this and she said it was fine as long as she was eating her food. Which she was. It was so hard to get through those days, but we did and she never had a bottle from that day on. Best of luck to you!

1 mom found this helpful

Hi Jessica, I weaned my daughter at just past 12 months and she was the same way- although we were down to just pm nursing. We eliminated am first- I would just go get her and give her breakfast. The pm one was harder. She rebelled like your little one, and tried pulling up my shirt, etc. She even threw the sippy cup! We finally had to go "cold turkey." She wanted to nurse, and I offered her the cup (which went flying), so I put her to bed. She slept fine. The next night she tried again, but didn't throw the cup. By night 3 she was fine and starting to enjoy the milk. I found that it really helped to warm the milk up, so she wasn't going from nice and warm breastmilk to straight from the fridge milk! Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful

Just my opinion, but if she is that insistent she is probably not ready to stop yet. Children have a sucking need, and nursing is incredibly comforting to them, plus it is still wonderfully good for her and helps her immune system. It is only in recent history in the Western world that we seem to have this idea that they should only nurse until they are one. My son nursed until he was 29 months and I let him wean himself. Like many things with children, it is different for every child, but there will be a point when they grow out of it, and in my opinion it is better to let them do it on their own time table.

My son decided he was ready about the time we got him a big boy bed. At that point he was only wanting to nurse at bed time anyway, and once the routine changed, he didn't want it anymore.

Here is some more good info if you are interested:

Gradually she wills start to eat and drink more table foods and move away from nursing. It just goes much more smoothly if you let them do it when they are ready.

1 mom found this helpful

Neither one of my children has been on board with my plans. Some children wean themselves between one and two. Mine certainly don't. My 18 month old is still very adamant. With my son, I weaned him at 18 months and on the advice of the pediatrician, just went cold turkey. She suggested that any child that was really attached to nursing was not going to understand why it was o.k. some of the time and not others. Granted, with my son I was working and quit pumping at one year, so by then, he was just 2-3 times a day. I went on a business trip for 2 days, and when I was back, just told him the milk was all gone. He cried for 1-2 days, and then we were done. My daughter is 18 mo and still asking frequently. I do tell her no sometimes, and she gets very upset, but her favorite times I going to leave until last and try cold turkey when I've had enough!

At 13 months old, you should still be able to distract her with something else (a toy? A favorite food? A book?) if she starts to throw a tantrum because you will not nurse her. Try getting away from the concept of drinks altogether if that is what is setting her off. She'll eventually drink from a cup when she is thirsty, if she is already doing it. Letting her throw a tantrum for any lengthy amount of time and then giving in to her by nursing her will only reinforce that tantrums get her what she wants and will also encourage her to keep it up longer next time. That was the advice our doc gave us in general for that age, and it was definitely correct with my daughter.

I did not have a problem weaning my daughter - she loved nursing, but was ok when we weaned because I was able to distract her from the usual nursing routine (the hardest were before bed and when I got home from work) and she'd become engrossed in some other activity we'd do together (reading, I believe) which distracted her. She weaned when she got frustrated with my milk supply being so low b/c we'd gotten to 1x/day and she just stopped. I know I had it easy, though.

My mother had a hard time with my brother and what she did was, as a previous poster mentioned - she let my dad put him to bed and deal with him when he was upset because he wanted to nurse. The change of routine and deviation from what was expected was what finally led to successful weaning.

Good luck! I know this is a hard thing to do, but your daughter's still young enough that it should be easier to do it now than if you wait.

my daughter, will be three this month. She nursed until she was 2yrs and a couple weeks. she would never take a bottle, i was very successful with her. We have 3 children. the other 2 were not successful. I was stressed with the thought that I must be doing something wrong since she was still nursing.
during the day, i would encourage her to drink out of her sippy. which she had been doing since she was 6 months. Her daddy came to my rescue. He started putting her to bed. It was tough. We gave her a sippy of water to go to bed with. She cried at first, but with Daddy putting her to bed.... and not me, it worked.
I am very happy that my bond with my little girl is very very strong. NOBODY can take that away. She was very healthy while she nursed, which we are blessed.

Try having daddy or someone else put her to bed. 13 months isnt that bad. Look at me, my little girl was a few weeks over 2. good luck.

Unfortunately due to medications I have to take I was never able to breastfeed, however I do believe that weaning is weaning whether it is froma bottle or breast. They tell you to get your kids off of the bottle by a year so, I will say I let my son have his until he was 18 months, and ecided to go cold turkey, it was sheer hell for about twop days, buit hen on the third it was like he never had a bottle at all. I did the same thing with his binky a few months later, and it went the same way..hell for a couple of days, and then it was fine. I t is really hard, because you feel bad that they feel bad, and there is some letting go for both of you in this process..which is hard...really hard. Also, some kids hate sippy cups, and like the ones with the straws better...is she eating a lot of solid food yet? Anyhow, I hope this helps, and good luck, it will all work itself out.

I am in the same boat any advice you get would be great to hear. It has helped us when my son gets sippy cups for sleep from grandma or daddy.

I had a very similiar situation when my youngest was about the same age. I also tried to wean a little after a year, and my daughter would have nothing to do with the weaning process. At about 15 months, I just told her that Mommoy was all out of milk. That was all there was to it. She tried to nurse several times over the next few days, I just kept telling her my milk was all gone. She may to to young, right now nusing is such a huge part if her life. Wait a couple of months and she will be able to understand more, and try again. Good luck!! They are only little once, cherish this time to snuggle.

Again, this is a moment where you as a parent are in charge and set the boundaries. Yes, she will probably throw a tantrum for 2-5 days that will break your heart. Then she'll learn cause and effect in that "throwing a tantrum does not let me get my way" and she'll be fine.

Oh Jessica,
I tried weaning my daughter at about the same age as yours and I ended up nursing until she was close to 21 months. I must confess that I didn't try very hard to wean her until she made the 18 month mark, then I felt that I was tired and it was time to stop. I started gradually eliminating dinner nursing and cut the night-time last. I would say "no more," and offer her a sippy cup. It hurt to see her so confused and sad, but each day it got a little easier. I went from very, very, gradual weaning to cold turkey. Do whatever you feel comfortable with and know that it will not go on forever. Good luck!

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