Weaning - Tampa,FL

Hey, that is a loss, so normal , very normal to feel that way, and good for realizing it.
A great Vit B will help alot, and maybe a good nutritional check up will help you too. That is so a lack of nutrients doesn't make you feel worse-
best,k

Of course you're not crazy! I weaned my daughter at about 18 months. It was the right time for both of us. But because she had been on whole milk for some time, I wasn't working at the time, and she weaned slowly, I had given up pumping several months earlier. And as you expected you would feel, I was joyous to give it up. But there were two big differences between my situation and yours. First, when I stopped pumping she was still nursing. And second, she weaned at a time that was mutually desirable for both of us. I think if you had stopped pumping while still nursing, you would be mourning the loss of nursing more and not the pumping. I suspect this sadness you feel is more tied to the fact that in some way, subconsciously, you were still associating the pumping with nursing. So you probably didn't fully work through your emotions associated with his weaning. And now you are forced to face that reality. For a mom that enjoys nursing, or nurses for an extended period of time, it can be difficult to let go of. Breastfeeding is one thing that, literally, no one else in the whole world can give to your child. So whether it is a bonding time or simply utilitarian, it is very natural to feel a strong sense of loss when that period in your child's life ends. And yes, your emotions are likely compounded by the expectation that he will be your last child. I still plan to have another someday (hopefully!). But many of my friends who have "finished" having children say it is harder to give up breastfeeding with the last one.

It's hard as a mom when unexpected emotions creep up on us. We have so many things on our plate to deal with that we don't leave room for the unexpected and we often don't give ourselves permission to work through them. Your relief will come with time, perhaps much more slowly than you anticipated. I am sorry you feel like you are missing out on that celebratory, elated feeling of being done though. But then again, you may be surprised again and feel some of it when you actually put your pump away for the last time. If you are like me, you may tend to mourn losses when you anticipate them, making the actual loss somewhat easier when it finally comes.

Cut yourself some slack. Your emotional state may have surprised you, but as you can see from all the responses, it really isn't that surprising! Hang in there and try to focus on the new, fun aspects of your son's development.

im so sorry but im the mother of 5 adult children and i feel that you should not be nursing that long. even your son knew it was time to start growing up a little. even if you dont have any more children you have been blessed with 2. you are lucky honey some people dont even have one. good luck GOD BLESS J.

I would suggest you think about all the ways you can bond with your child now and treasure those. You still have so many special ways to connect, but you will have to let go little by little. You can probably snuggle with him, kiss him, hold his hand, carry him around, etc. My son is 9 years hold and I can still do the snuggling and the carrying, but he doesn't like kisses and will only hold my hand on the rare occasion. The snuggling will soon be something he doesn't want anymore and he's almost too big to carry.

Just wanted to say thank you for your post. I'm currently experiencing the same emotions/struggles! My daughter is 13 months and it is time to wean. We're down to one/day and I'm holding onto to that feeding I think more than she is some days!

Thank you to all of the mother's that have responded as well. Your insite is very much appreciated. It's great to put this in perspective and to know that these feelings of sadness are "normal".

It's totally normal to feel this way. My son is 3 and I still get teary eyed at him not breastfeeding any more. He had to be weaned because I got pregnant again and my milk supply dried up. Some times, he still tries but he says he doesn't remember even breastfeeding and he was weaned a few months back.

I love breastfeeding. I absolutely know how you feel. I would love to let him start again but since he doesn't remember and he has all those teeth; granted he had those teeth when I was still breastfeeding; but if he really doesn't remember, then I can't risk my daughters food.

I know exactly what you're going through. My daughter weaned herself off of me when she was 13 months old and my milk supply decreased. I thought I was going to be relieved, but I was so sad just like you. I still think of days when I breastfed her and it brings me to tears sometimes. I think it's because we're realizing our children are growing up. You are not crazy for feeling that way. Believe me, you're going to feel that way when your child transitions to a bigger bed, when he starts school, all the milestones that show he's becoming his own person. But breastfeeding, I think, is the hardest to deal with, because this child was dependent on you and the bond that you shared is changed, but there will be other bonding there to share with your beautiful children.

I am a mother to three beautiful children. They are ages 9, 7, and 3. My three year old turns four this month. I breastfeed them all. The first one, I breastfeed her for 18 months. The second one, I breastfeed him for 11 months. The third child, I breastfeed him for 24 months.

I went threw a huge roller coaster ride of emotions when it was time for each one of them to stop.
I cried alot and I would tell my husband how they didn't need me anymore.

He would giggle and say that it is fine and that I am their M. and they will always need me.
And he was right. ( but let's not ever tell him that he was right )! LOL. = )

This is just a phase in the life of mommyhood. This too shall pass and everything will be fine.

Merry Christmas and God bless you and your family.

These are normal weaning emotions, Mama. This too shall pass. Grieve the loss if needed.

Ok I just totally cried reading your post! My daughter weaned over a year ago and i am still sad over it! it is such a special time in their life and so nurturing so of course as mothers we mourn the loss of that stage. Its totally normal! good news is that now our little ones really turn into silly, charming, sweet little people that give us more and more joy. :-)

You're not crazy for feeling that way! I went through the same thing a few months back. I kept waiting for my daughter to wean herself but it never happened. She was 20 months when I stopped breastfeeding (and my son had just turned 4). I was a wreck for a few days! I felt like my baby wasn't a baby anymore and that my son was suddenly a boy! We are done having children so I think my sadness was due in part to knowing that there will be no more babies. Luckily I felt better within about a week and now that my daughter will be 2 in a few days I don't have time to even think back about it. I'm too busy chasing 2 little ones around! Just give it time. You may get over this feeling quickly or it may take a while but I promise that feeling of relief will come!

L., I have had two episodes of my daughter not nursing for a few days (due to seperation) and both times we thought that would be the end of it, but no. She goes right back to it. And inside, I am relieved. As much as I think I want to be done, in the face of it, I am glad when she still wants to do it. It could be many things, one of which is the knowledge that she will be my only child (well, that is the plan!). So I think it is perfectly natural to be sad about this phase passing. Best of everything to you and I hope you feel better about it all real soon.

I know exactly how you feel! I have two girls, 3 and 4, and I nursed them each for 14 months. At the end I could not wait to be done with it once and for all since I had only a four month break inbetween the two births. When I finally put an end to it I felt a huge sense of relief - FOR ABOUT A MINUTE! I had had my tubes tied with my 2nd c-section as we knew we only wanted two kids, so I definitely knew it was a forever kind of over. I had never realized that I would miss it or how much - like they say, you just don't know until it's gone.

Now sometimes I can't wait for them to get a little bit older and at least wipe themselves when they go to the bathroom - but I'm sure, in some twisted way, when that's gone I'll miss it, too!

This probably didn't help how you're feeling, but at least you know that you are not alone!

T.
http://hubpages.com/profile/_lilyrose/lily+rose

Hi L.. You are not crazy. Breastfeeding is a bonding experience for both of you. I nursed mine for quite a long time, and even though I was more than ready when I weaned my second, I still cried. Even the pumping (which I know is a chore) symbolizes something for you-- maybe it means having a little baby, maybe it means nurturing that baby, maybe it's the pride and joy of being able to grow this robust, healthy little kid with something your body produces.

By the way, please ignore the responses of older ladies who tell you you nursed too long. Our knowledge has come a long way from the advice they got when they had their kids. I certainly hope she didn't mean to make you feel bad. :)

Whatever it is you are mourning, it's a natural process. If you are finding it difficult to give up, be kind to yourself and do it on your own timetable. You certainly aren't harming him by giving him some extra breastmilk even after he's weaned.

And, BTW, Congratulations on a full year of nursing! You are one of the minority. Good for you. :)

Sorry you're feeling as you are but it is normal. I nursed till my daughter was 4 and now that she's 7 I still miss it sometimes. It's a wonderful bond that mother and child share and so sadly missed out on by so many that think artificial breast milk is better. If he weaned himself sadly there is nothing you can do but cherish your time with your son as a little one and know that it's awesome that you nursed!!! You did the absolute best thing you can for your son and just keep reminding yourself of that. The nursing will be finished but you can still spend special moments cuddling or gentle time alone.
Good for you!!!!