Wanting Opinions About Putting My Daughter in Pre-K3 Early...

I say put her in school. My oldest daughter sounds a lot like yours with the exception that she had never been to daycare. I put her in school in September and she turned 3 that following December. She is in a private school that has been wonderful. She will be entering Kindergarten this September and I wouldn't have changed anything. As long as you feel that your daughter can handle herself socially with kids that will be as much as a full year older than her, I think you should do it. The academics don't sound like they will be a problem for her based on your description of her abilities. Good Luck and get your camera ready for the 1st day of Big Girl school.

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I put my daughter in pre-school at three. It was the right thing to do because all of her cousins were going off to school and she was desperate to go also - and she thrived. I will tell you that the school accpeted her conditionally since she was so young and they were afraid there would be issues - but after the first day they changed their stance as there were no issues. There are kids who can handle it and those who can't - you know your daughter best. So I say go for it

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Hi T.,

While your daughter may be ready for the curriculum of 3 year old preschool, consider the age difference. If she is in daycare with same aged kids, remember that she'll be in preschool with kids who may be a full year older than she is. When my son was preschool aged, there was a boy in his class whose mom started him a year late, and he was more than a year older than some of the kids. Find out if the children are just turning 3 for the most part, or closer to turning 4. At this age, a year is a big difference. And while she may be able to recite things, at 2 1/2, kids often don't have the small motor skills needed for things that are in preschool curriculum like holding scissors correctly, buttoning or zipping their own coats and things like that which may be expected.
The other thing to consider is if she misses the school district cutoff, that she would be in preschool for 3 years. My son is now going into 4th grade and is in school and scouts with the same boys that he went through 2 years of preschool with. It may not matter to you, but your daughter would be with a group now who will be a grade ahead in school and would she do 2 years of 3 year old preschool and one year of 4, or the reverse, and would she get bored repeating the same curriculum twice?
Just things to consider. Good luck.

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From my own personal experience...I was the youngest in my class from 2nd grade on (pushed ahead). Academically, it was great. Socially it was great - until I was a teenager. And going into college, I don't think I was as mature as I could have been (a year later). My own son turns 6 on Nov 30, and he is just starting Kindergarten this year. Yes, he could have handled it just FINE last year, but I'm more concerned about how he will be as a teenager, and therefore, we kept him back.

My $.02...

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i totally understand the daycare expenses with 2 kids. i actually got laid off after i had my daughter, so that just was the way it was for us.

i am planning on putting her in a pre-k when she is just about 3 because my son benefited from daycare so much! he surprises me with how much he knows and is very social and polite...

my son is starting kindergarten in a catholic school in 2 weeks (i can't believe it!!)... so we will be putting my daughter in that same place too. Let me tell you that the cost for private school is a FRACTION of the cost of traditional daycare center!!!

the "interview" is just to see if she is ok with the teacher, doing ABCs and basics... if she knows that, there shouldn't be a problem. plus it's so much better for the kids to have a structure rather than open play all day long.

we would have paid 20,000+ per year for full time at a daycare center and private school for 2 kids is approx 6,000 PER YEAR!!!!!

so i say do what you feel is the best situation for you and your children. I feel that i want the values of a religious background for my kids young... so follow your mommy instincts --they are always right!

-L.

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I don't think it could hurt. My children attend a Catholic Pre-K and it is all about colors and numbers for the 3 year olds. My son was never in Daycare, and he did fine - I think your child may have an advantage since she has already been in a school type setting.

I say have her evaluated and go for it!!!

GOOD LUCK!

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Hi T.
Your daughter sounds like a delight, and congrats on the new baby to come.
Assuming that they are not forcing children to learn but giving them the opportunity to learn, to which your daughter seems to take advantage I write this. My children all of them when given the choice of books or trucks picked books; writing or coloring picked writing; building or pretending picked building; listening to stories or watching TV picked listening. I come from that perspective-- that she is given the choices and this is fun for her. If that is so
What's the problem? Sounds like you know the rules, are working within them by letting them interview her to see if she can handle the work.(if they say she can't don't be offended be thankful because if she can't you don't want her there) Would they do that if she was of age or are they just doing that because she is underage? You don't make that clear, but assuming that it is an underage that is the case, I am in full support of that. You can imagine what would happen if they accepted a young 2 year old who just would not be ready for table/desk time. There whole program would be in jeopardy, and when they asked that person to pull their child out because of it, not only is the child in a mess, you might be left without a place in any facility never mind the best choice. Sounds like your daughter will make the cut really well and that you should just continue to work within the system.
You always have to fight for your gifted children. Sounds like she learns quickly. What a blessing!! It was our preschool teacher who caught before we did that our then youngest was reading. By the time he entered K he was reading the newspaper. I had to fight so he didn't fall for the mediocracy of the system. They actually told me that they had to "make him wait while the others caught up to him" The others never did catch up. Today he is a lawyer for the US government. We ended up sending him to private school where he tested out of 4th grade material going into first, and finished grades 5,6,7 & some of 8th in that year. If you are in my situation write me I have helps for you.
Intelligent children are lots of fun and remember they are the ones that can pick and choose from the myriad of opportunities out there to do exactly what they want to do. Help her choose well, with goals all the way.
God bless you and all you do
K. SAHM married 38 years-- old enough to be your mom. Ask her about stories, I trust she will love sharing -- 4 children - 37 years, 32 years(the lawyer who made us grandparent 3 weeks ago) and twins 18 years headed for college.

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A lot of schools offer a 2 year old program and if they are decent schools they should be able to provide an option for her. I know we have a 3 yr old in the 4 yr old program right now and he is doing fantastic there. The 3 wasn't challenging enough. For the most part it is and teachers should be able to make the projects and activities a little more difficult for your daughter if she needs to be challenged.
Children have changed so much that the curriculum needs to be updated. You should be asking them what they can do to challenge her.

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hi T.;

i think it's wonderful that your daughter is getting so much out of a school enviornment. some kids thrive in these settings.

i thought it was interesting that you made a point of saying you did not want to debate staying home because it is not possible; well that's totally your right, and, even if you were staying home, it sounds like your daughter does very well with school anyway. i am a stay home mom and my son, 3, is in play school 25 hours a week because he needs and thrives on much more stimulation and contact with other children and adults than i could possibly provide here. and i have an 18 mo old as well, so there's no way i could keep him running for 6 hours at a time straight as he would like. so i think you are really doing the right thing.

i would definitely see if your daughter can handle a more challenging program, it sounds like she is very bright, and the more school she learns to acclimate to the better; it's a competitive world out there. it's great if you can encourage her to stretch her mind and other abilities.

good luck!
J.

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Dear T.,

As an owner of a Montessori School I would suggest you check out one in your area. It sounds as if your daughter is very bright for her age. In a Montessori environment children are encouraged to progress as their own level therefore they are not always grouped by age. Children are not pushed nor are they held back. I for instance have some four year old sit in on some kindergarten lessons because they can handle the challenge and need it so they do not become bored. Do some research read about the Montessori Philosophy and I think it might be a good fit for you and your child.

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Hi T.-
I would suggest taking some time to watch the pre-k in action first. Some are great! Meet the teacher she'll have and ask her (or his) opinion. You'll get alot of info about the class from their response. Our experience with pre-k was a good one.
I sent my child early. Daycare was getting boring- well beyond his years in accomplishment. I also decided to send him to kindergarten early thinking it was a good choice. If I had that to do over again, I would have waited. Kids are only little and innocent for such a short time. They may master the proverbial 'ABC's early, but there is so much else to learn while they're so young.
Good luck!

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It sounds to me like your daughter is more than ready for pre-school. She has a good foundation and social skills from being in day care. I think pre-school is great for children. I am a stay at home mom and my daughter is going to start pre-school in two weeks. It's important for them to socialize with other children. Good luck with the school and with the new baby.

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Is there a way that you could do a part-time program? Maybe two to three full days and the rest of the time with a sitter or in day care. I think it's great that you want to provide your daughter with all the tools necessary to help her reach her potential. However she is only two. Right now getting her into a regimented schedule of catholic school on a daily basis may not be the best thing for her. You will also be exposing her to not just three year olds, but four year olds also and she can easily pick up on their habits and behavior which may or maynot be age appropriate.

We put my daughter into Pre-K early, she has an October birthday. She did really well in Pre-K and really enjoyed it. The only thing I wished I changed was giving her an extra Year of Pre-K instead of starting her in Kindergarten when she was 4. She's the youngest in her class and sometimes I wonder if it shows (Some of the kids in her grade are 9 now and she's still 7).

I'd say if you think she's ready for it, go for it, but maybe keep it in your mind and hers that she's not necessarily going to go to Kindergarten in 2 years, and do another round of Pre-K or a Kindergarten Prep class. Good Luck and Congratulations on the pregnancy!

I would say that the schools understand that children that age can have accidents. My son started prek when he was three, I sent an extra outfit to school in a large ziplock baggy just in case. When he had an accident they would just change his clothes and return the other outfit to me and I would send them another set of extras.

I say do it. Why not? If they accept her into the program, then they think she can handle it. It's only pre-school - not first grade. Also, putting her in early does not mean that she is going to kindergarden early (although, if she is doing really well, they may give you that option).

I think that there is nothing wrong with putting a child into a learning environment early. If it's too much, you can pull her out and put her back into day care.

My daughter is a little over two and she is starting pre school in a few weeks (a 2 YO program). Good luck and don't stress - you can always pull her out if it's not working.

When we sent my son to pre-school last yr he wasn't expected to be totally potty trained. But he had to be started as they were not changing diapers. But we had to send him to school with extra clothes for accidents. Talk to the school and see what they recommend. Ask if it doesn't work out can you withdraw her from the program and get your $$$ back.

I think that it is a matter of whether or not you think that your daughter will enjoy her time in the school. In my opinion, that is the most important thing. I appreciate that you are looking for others opinions to guide you decision ( I did exactly the same thing), but you know your daughter and your family best so, really, I think that you should just follow your instincts. A.

I own and teach the Pre-K program in Pompton Lakes. I am very affordable in you wanted to put your children in my school.
My website is www.littleachieverschilddevelopmentcenter.com and my phone number is ###-###-####.

Best of luck to you.

M. Santoro
Director/Owner/Teacher
Little Achievers

My daughter is a November 26th child and she never suffered through school. The only thing that was aggrevating to her when she was little, was, "how come they are turning 5 and I am turning 4? She couldn't get a handle on the calendar. Aside from that, you know your child. Is she mature enough? Does she have any anxiety during periods of seperation? You know her best, you are her mom. If she is mature enough, send her. If not, then don't. Good luck. Oh and my kids went to a Christian preschool. I definitely would recommend it for your child. B.

T.,

I definitely am against putting a child into preschool early, but that's just my opinion. We institutionalize our children so young...there is not need to push it. I understand that you need to do something with her since you work and go to school, but daycare is such a better choice in my opinion. Let her be a kid, she doesn't need all of the early learning. Even Kindergarten teacher will tell you that in September it is obvious who has had preschool, but by January they all catch up (the one's who didn't). That tells me that they don't need preschool. I don't send my kids and they do just fine in school.

That's my two cents.

D.

Just something to consider -- not sure where you live, or if your children will be going to public school; but in NY state, a child my be 5 before Dec 1st to be eligible to enroll in Kindergarten.

Good luck!!! I remember the days of 2 in day care and it is a strain on any budget

I have to agree with Kristin and Donna.

Our children will spend so much time in school from K through 12. Then they may choose to go further after that. Putting them in school prior to that is just too much. One year of pre-K is probably a good idea to get them ready for the routine and the setting and the whole idea of the change.

But children learn through play and socialization. Let them enjoy being a kid. Let them play with blocks and dolls, puzzles and cars, games and puppets! Most daycare settings will give them that and more.

Hi T.,

You sound bright and your daughter sounds brighter.
Trust yourself and do it.

At 2 1/2, the focus should be on play, with any academics mixed in just for fun. A good day-care facility with kids grouped by age will have enough structure and enough play time to keep you daughter thriving. I didn't get a clear picture of her current daycare, but it sounds like they're doing a great job keeping her challenged and learning. IMO, an all-day preschool at this age is just unnecessary. We want our kids to think school is FUN as long as possible. Keep in mind too, with a December birthday, you're looking at 3 years of preschool if you start now. Many kids get just 1 year of preschool, and they are way ahead of the kids who didn't get any preK at all.

On the other hand, if you're not happy with your current daycare, and you really really like this preschool, then I would suggest you closely monitor her at-home behavior to make sure the school setting isn't too overwhelming. You'll know pretty quickly if it isn't working out. Trust your gut and good luck!