Wanting More Children While First Is Still Quite Young

hey i know how u feel my daughter mary is 23 months and we want another little one. I think its better to have children close together then years apart that way they can learn to play together.

2 moms found this helpful

Sidewalk chalk! (one of my favorite warm-weather outdoor things) And, when the pieces get small and stumpy, put them in a little bucket of water to soak, and they get a finger-paint consistency. Great fun! Also, for $10 at Target last week I bought a bubble machine that produces thousands of bubbles in almost no time. My boys (3 and 5) love it, and I imagine that a 10-month old would adore it too. One small bottle of bubbles lasts about 1/2 hour.

Good luck!
J.

2 moms found this helpful

Spacing your children is your own personal decision. Honestly, what others think doesn't matter that much; it's all about you and your husband. I had wanted to get pregnant when my first was 18 months, but unfortunately, it took one whole extra year. My daughter was just over 3 instead of just over 2 when my son was born. After trying that year to get pregnant with no luck (my daughter was conceived after one month of no pills) and no birth control whatsoever, my doctor said that the depoprovera I had been taking the year after her birth was still in my system even though I had been not taking it for one year. She prescribed something that restarted my menstrual cycle and then I took ortho tricyclen for three months and conceived right away. Are you breastfeeding? That sometimes affects your chances of conceiving. Talk to your doctor about personal ways to boost your chances. Hope this helps!

1 mom found this helpful

I am so happy you are getting such positive responses! My daughter will be 20 months on Tuesday and I am due with our 2nd daughter on the 26th. Although I have gotten a lot of "do you think it's a race?" or "you do know what causes that right?" from my extended family, I am very excited for them to be close together. One of my best friends and her sister are 20 months apart and now as adults they are inseperable. I think that children close in age can grow up to be very close (which would have a side affect of making our lives easier by occupying themselves! :) ) Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful

There is nothing wrong about having another child while the first one is young. The reason why I know that is because my children are three years apart. But I have a relative that has kids that are one year apart. So I don't think that there is nothing wrong about it, so if you and your husband are ready for anohter child go with your gut feeling and not worry about what other people think about because its your life and if thats what you want go for it..

1 mom found this helpful

Personal Choice. I know the doctors say wait a year but I personally think that if your body is not ready to get pregnant again...it won't. My first two were 18 months. I hadn't planned to get pregnant when my son was nine months but it worked out great. There are three of us and we are all eighteen months apart. I personally think it is better to have them all grow up together. GO FOR IT!
Our third took three years of trying. Don't know why. I would love a fourth so my little one has a buddy to grow up with but we will have to see.

1 mom found this helpful

i honestly belive you know what is right for your family. plus i am the oldest of five childen in my family and i think it is great that me and my brother are only lke 14 months apart. we have closer bond that i do with my younger siblings who are 7,5,and 4 years younger than me. i also had my kids close in procimity for that very same reason. i like i said you know your family better than anyone on here does and if you think you are ready than i think you should go for it. good luck and i hope i have helped.

1 mom found this helpful

I think it is personal choice as to how close you choose to have your children. My brother and I are 3 years apart and we were best friends growing up. Still to this day we are very close and live over 2 hours apart. I have one child
, but want to wait a few years for another because of how close my brother have been our entire lives. It seems to me, 3 is the "magic number". Many other people I have spoke to on the subjuct have seemed to agree in their own expriences as well.
If you choose to have your children close together, I would just say to make sure you are ready for that and are prepared.

1 mom found this helpful

My girls are about 17 months apart and I love it!!! They are the best of friends and they will always have a strong relationship!!

We tried to get pregnant for 4 months with baby number three and no such luck... Then I found www.babyhopes.com. We got pregnant in the next month!! If you go to the site and scroll down looking on the left side click on ovulation calendar. Enter your info and it will tell you your most fertile days for the next 3 months. It works great, I have many friends that got pregnant from this site!!

1 mom found this helpful

Janie,

I say go for it. If it is what you want. We have six children our first two are 4 yrs apart and then the rest are about 15-18mos apart. They all get along well even the oldest even loves being the big brother and is proud of his family. We have 3 boys and then 3 girls. We didn't plan a single one of them and had only started discussing the second one when we discovered he was already on the way. Sometimes, the best is just to enjoy your husband and not focus so much on it.

Books, going to the park, singing together and doing hand motions, touching nature, and laughing a lot are my advice to things to do.

Wish you the best of luck!!

A.

1 mom found this helpful

Mine are 9 1/2 months apart due to the fact my daughter came at 28 weeks.. she wasn't planned. .but it's fun them being so close. i hope they will have lots of fun together.they seem to even now at 2 1/2 and 3(boy). i don't think there is anything wrong with having kids close together. there are other boards about close siblings if you want them. where you'll feel right at home. if y ou want it let me know.
as far as to boost your chances. do you know if you are regular? have you tried an ovulation kit? i haven't had time to read the other responses so maybe these have already been given to you.
main thing, relax!:-)

crafts- we do some things i have gotten off the internet and i have also bought some books.. but mine are older.
one thing, ya know those little pop bottles or water bottles. get different types of things like rocks, beads, noodles, pennies, feathers, cotton balls. etc, you get the idea. things that will make different sounds. put them in the empty and label free bottle. with the lid tight! my kids loved using them as different types of 'rattles'. we also got a beach ball and blew it up. tied a string to it and put one of those little hooks that you screw into a wall. and we screwed it into a place where it was away from walls etc.like a ceiling or different level of the ceiling. hard to explain. anyway.. before they could walk i would keep it low enough so when they laid under it they could kick and hit at it. then when they got older i would raise it up. i can't recall at what age i finally took it down. i think 1 1/2 maybe.
that's all i have for now:-)
good luck..
T.

1 mom found this helpful

I have 3 kiddos they are evenly spaced out My oldest Larisa is 6 my next child Taylor is 3 and then we have a new baby who is 3 months i really like ahving the 3 year gap in between them My oldest is super helpful with her siblings and there is not such a huge gap that they arent goin to be close but it is a personal choice I grew up with 8 brothers and sisters and we are all about 15-18 months apart one right after the other :) so it really depends on how much stress you want to give yourself hope this helps :)

1 mom found this helpful

I do understand where you are coming from. Our oldest is now 20 and the three youngest range from 11-7. There is nothing wrong to wanting them close. I'ld space them out about 1-2 yrs apart not more than that. At times the more you want it, the longer it seems to take. My husband and I went through that we our third son. You will get pregnant! Just don't put so much pressure on yourself and husband. Enjoy the time trying and it will happen.

For crafts go to familyfun.com. They have a lot of different crafts and ideas. You can choose the age range for the crafts and other fun things!

Good Luck!!!

K. H.

1 mom found this helpful

Hello :) I think there are pros and cons to having them close, and far apart. And I think you should just do what feels right. My oldest will be 5 in November, and my youngest will be 1 in December. My oldest is SUPER helpful, I don't have to pay a billion dolers in diapers, my oldest will be leaving one school as my youngest enters it, so they won't be so competative. But we were done really! And had to start all over ;) I think you should do what works for you.

About getting pregnant. It took me a year to get pregnant the second time, and I am young! I was told it was the birth control I'd been on. Just relax, and for pete sake, don't mess with fertility drugs (I saw that suggestion). Unless there is a reason for them, leave it be. Sometimes it takes a while, but it will happen. You got pregnate the first time around without help. Unless you want to end up carrying 6 kiddos!!! Those drugs are not for healthy, able bodied women. They are for women who have tried for many many years unsuccesfully.

Good Luck!

1 mom found this helpful

Janie,

I think that if you and your husband both agree on the plan to have your children close together then it is perfect for the family that you are creating! Everyone is different and I have heard from friends that having children close together does create quite good friendships.

On the conception thing, I used an ovulation calendar that charted my cycles from a web site called amazingpregnancy.com . I have recommended it to numerous people who also have had success with it. This web site gives recommendation on all kinds of things and has many neat things to try. I have read articles on everything from the Shettles method to charting cervical mucus. I used the ovulation calendar to determine the best dates to try to conceive for my last two children Joshua 3 years and Jonas 3 weeks and the very first time worked for both of them. Good Luck!

M.

1 mom found this helpful

Hi Janie,

I had my first two about 23 mo apart and I loved it, there were some trying times, but over all I would do it again in a heart beat. My youngest is 4 yrs younger than my middle son and 6 years younger than my oldest, basically he is left to play with himself or the adults cause the older two have each other. Now don't get me wrong they play with him but lets face it playing with a 3 year old isn't much fun....:)
Anyways at 10 mo my son loved to take shaving cream to the sliding glass windows, sometimes we would use whip cream and make funny faces or just draw, it was a hoot. Baking is always fun with kids also.. At least I thought so.
Good Luck

1 mom found this helpful

There is no need to worry about what other people think about having kids close together. There is always pros and cons to either situation. My oldest is 7 years older than my twins. I would have never had them be so far apart but we had difficulty concieving. Then my youngest son is only 20 months younger that his twin sisters. my oldest wishes there was a sibling closer in age to her but she also expresses how she enjoyed the specail alone time she used to have with us. Again, there is always pros and cons. My younger ones love to have eachother to play with and my older one loves to join in. Don;t worry about it taking longer to concieve the second time. It can take up to 6 months to a year and be perfectly normal. Just make sure that you have maped out your cycle and know your optimal conception days. And you have any questions don't hesitate to go to you OBGYN and ask. Good luck with everything and keep up the good hands on work with your little one. Have a great day! K.

1 mom found this helpful

I think it's great you want more kids while you first child is still young. My husband and I have a 14 month old daughter and are due with a second daughter in early October. We found out we were pregnant with baby #2 when our first daughter was 9 months old! Good luck! :)

1 mom found this helpful

Its one personal choice as to how far apart one wants their kids. I wanted mine 2 yrs apart, but it didnt happen at first. I know for experience that trying to get pregnant takes a lot longer then trying not to get pregnant!! lol This is how I know. My oldest is 7, 8 in October, my next one, who I wanted 2 yr younger, is 2, 3 next month. Then we decided we liked that gap and were going to wait a few yrs before #3 which will be 1 next month (yep 24 months apart). Well, we thought our little family is complete, after all 1 handsome boy and 2 beautiful daughters was just about perfect, so we were done. Apparently, we are not done though, all that trying to not get pregnant has seemingly gotten us pregnant with #4, due in March, making the last 2 18 months apart!! LOL So relax, enjoy what you have now, and when its meant to happen, it will, trust me it will happen, though maybe not when you want it to. You just need to have faith and trust. Good Luck (and have lots of fun ;) lol)

1 mom found this helpful

Go ahead! Have more sooner. I am the youngest of 9 and the closest is 4 years older than me. I know what you mean by not really knowing your siblings. My only brother is 22 years older than I and he doesn't know me at all. Not suprising.
We had twins and then 18 months later had another boy. We were young, and believe that they are better for it, and so are we. We will probably be around 45 when they are all out of the house and still be young enough to enjoy our grandkids (?) and/or also our mid-life together!

No child is too young to learn anything! Whatever your hands find to do, start teaching, or at least explaining the process to your child. They will reap benefits later!
Blessings!

1 mom found this helpful

my kids are not quite 2 years apart. there are good and bad to having them close together. I was reading something that talked about when kids are 2 or less years apart, it's very similar to having twins. your always busy, their developmentally stages are very close, their likes/dislikes very similar. reason being, I guess, is because often #2 surges ahead to be like #1. But they play together so nicely and they actually help each other. I do think that as they get into teen years, we'll see some stiff competitiveness b/t them, but that can also breed closness.

sometimes just the stress of "trying" can cause you to "misfire". You may not even think you're stressed, but subconsciously you're being worried that it's not happening is helping to thwart it's success. i wouldn't worry about trying to get them to be close together, just have "fun" (ya know what i mean) and it'll happen. You're body has done it once, with no problems, so the 2nd will happen.

1 mom found this helpful

Hello,
I have 3 biological children (the 1st was an oops, the rest were planned at 13-18 months apart. We got 14 and 18 months). When the youngest was born, I had 3 under 3. It was great! Was it hard at times? You bet. Was it worth it? Without a doubt. I only went thru the bottles, once. I went thru diapers, once. I went thru potty training, once. When it was done, it was done. It wasn't like I had to store the bottles, potty chair, crib, etc and then dig it out again and again. We have 6 adopted kids. The youngest is the only one we got as an infant. But 4 out of the 6 are within 26 months of each other. Did I and will I have teens all at the same time? Yes. Was it easy? Yes. No in and out of rules, resetting rules, driver's ed basically once etc. Dating basically once. It was and is great! We are a close knit family. I even have 9 grandkids, the oldest is 6 years old, the youngest is 13 months (our daughter has 4 of them, the oldest and youngest with 2 in between). (one son has 2 that are only 10 months apart :) So as cousins, they are very close too.
Sorry about rambling but I hope it helps!
In the end, God will determine the spacing. It'll happen in HIS time.
Have your little one stringing (big)wooden beads. He can make his own "necklace" that he can take apart and put together again. Works on his fine motor skills.
Good luck and God's Blessings

1 mom found this helpful

Hi Cara. Most doctors say to wait at least 2 years before having another child because of the effects on the woman's body giving birth does to it. If you're ready to have another child, then I say go for it. If you're having problems with conceiving this time, possibly try fertility drugs or see a specialist that can assist with that. As for keeping your son busy, I'd say just get down on the floor with him and let him explore and play with him. If he can sit up well enough, even get him a kiddie pool, my 21 month old loves his! He gets mad at me when I take him out of it. Keep up with the activities that you're already doing, that's great of you to do that with your son. Other ideas is to let him help you "cook" in the kitchen, sit him in his highchair and let him "help" you with things. Hope this helps.

1 mom found this helpful