16 answers

Wanting Another Baby at 40 Yrs Old

I lost an unexpected pregnancy last year at age 39. Since that time Ive been trying to decide whether or not to actually have a 3rd baby. Im worried about having another miscarriage. Ive been told by my doctor that Im not TOO old to get pregnant again, especially since I got pregnant before without even trying ! I wanted to know if there were any other "older" moms out there that could offer some advice and let me know what its like having a baby at an older age.

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So What Happened?™

I just wanted to thank everyone for their encouragement !! It means alot to know there are other women out there who know what Im going through! Hubby supports me, whatever my decision is. I guess my concerns are with the chances of chromosomal problems and going through another miscarriage that scares me. We've endured alot of loss this past 12 months. After losing the baby, my god mother died 10 days later. My mom past away this 3/1/07. Of course every OB you go to has different advice too. One OB told me that the chances of anything being wrong with another pregnancy are slim to none. Another OB told me that I have an increased risk of another miscarriage just because Im OLD ! Did any of you ladies go to OB's or did you go to high risk doctors?

May you all be blessed !
A. R

Featured Answers

Hi A.. I'm 39 and just had my last child three years ago. It was the best thing I've ever done, and I'd really love to have another baby. My only problem is that I'm not in a relationship, so having another baby is kind of impossible for me. But it seems that you are with a wonderful man, and if you want to have another child, by all means you should do whatever you think will make you happy.

1 mom found this helpful

More Answers

Hi A.,

In my opinion children are a blessing at any age. My feeling is it's really up to you.(Personal preference) Age is just a number. You can be a good Mom at 25 just as easily as being a good Mom at 40+. What neat is that you have an advantage...you've had other children, you have experience! :o) I had my last baby at 37. Actually, I was surprised with twins. Yes, I don't have as much energy as I once did. That could be from having other young children as well. :o) What might help you in making a decision is weighing the pros and cons. How does your hubby feel about it? Your other kids? Whatever you decide will be the right thing for you. My advice: Don't let others influence you by saying you're too old. Best of Luck!

1 mom found this helpful

Hi A.. I'm 39 and just had my last child three years ago. It was the best thing I've ever done, and I'd really love to have another baby. My only problem is that I'm not in a relationship, so having another baby is kind of impossible for me. But it seems that you are with a wonderful man, and if you want to have another child, by all means you should do whatever you think will make you happy.

1 mom found this helpful

Hi A.,

Well, I'm 36, my children are 16,11, and 4,and I'm prego with my 4th. Unexpected also, but very welcome. If your doctors are giving you the go ahead and you feel in heart all is good, I'd say go for it.

Hope this helps.

God bless and good luck,

L.

A. -
I'm very sorry for your loss.
I had my daughter when I was 38, she is 2 1/2 now. At this stage of my life, I am amazed at how differently I view things, and the patience that I have. I enjoy every minute, every second that I spend with my daughter. What they say is so true, they grow so fast! I think if you and your husband decide to take the plunge, you will enjoy it more than ever! and I am sure that your son and daughter will also be excited and will be a great source of support. You are young, trust me, alot of women are waiting till your age to have their first! Whatever you do, good luck.

A.- I will be 40 in 3 mos. I have a 12 1/2 and 10 yo, both girls. I had a mc 4 years ago, and was just blessed with our little boy last Sept. To say the least I was in shock when we found out, but I wouldn't change any of it now. Yes, it is a bit rougher at the night time feedings, but when isn't it? I am not in my 20's anymore, and may not have as much energy, but I have a lot more experience under my belt as well. The girls help out some, especially since my hubby is out of town every other week, but we do just fine, and my little man is the love of my life- everyone says he will keep us young! lol. I say if you want one, and your Dr says go ahead- then why not! I had no complications, and he is just perfect, so happy and smiling all the time. He just lights up the room! I wish you the best, and can totally relate to your story!
Take care, W.

Hi A.,
As I was reading your post, I felt like I was reading about my own situation. I had a miscarriage last July and my husband and I decided to keep trying for another baby until this past January (I have two boys, 5 1/2 and 3). We thought that maybe I might be getting too old (I will be 38 in October). Unfortunately, in my heart I still really want another child. I also work part-time and my two boys keep me really busy, but I feel like I would find the time to love another child. It was helpful to read all of the other responses you received. I wish you good luck with your decision!

Hi A.,

I'm 47,I have grandchildren and find it very tiring when I babysit my toddler grandchildren, the running around , changing diapers and when I keep them overnight and they get up in the middle of the night, it throws my whole day off. But that something u will have to decide, because everyone is different, when I was younger I could watch ten children with no problem. My daughter just moved out with her 2yr old and I enjoy the peace & quiet. I helped her with him when he was teething or when he was sick, and I told her I don't miss those kinds of days, I had five children , but I had my last ones at 28, they were twins and I enjoyed them, but three yrs after having them I got divorced, then I met my 2 husband, I was 31 he was 40, I wanted to have a least 1 more with him, but he didn't want any more, he said I don't want to be old and have to go to a father & daughter dance, so now we just enjoy our grandchildren. You didn't say how old yr husband is and how he feels about having another child. Good luck in yr decision.

Hi A., I'm sorry to hear about your miscarriage last year.
I had my first baby a couple days before my 40th birthday. And I have to say that the pregnancy for me was not a problem, nor the first year. The second year (current) has been a bit more challenging when it comes to my energy. Although I think I have a lot of energy, I am completely tired to do anything else in the evening after I take him to bed. Is that normal? I'm not sure since I didn't have any children when I was younger. But I LOVE IT! Sometimes I think that being older you tend to be more aware of your children and appreciate them more, but that may only apply to me.
Good luck with reaching your decision!

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