C.M. asks from Cincinnati, OH on October 15, 2011
Trick-or-Treat
Halloween is not that far away. Every year there are always those tween/teens who don't even bother to dress up, yet go around collecting candy. Then there are the kids that don't even say "trick-or-treat". They just look at you like "well, are you going to give me some or what?!?!" look. Not to mention all of the parents with little kids that are so young that they can barely walk, let alone hold their own bag. Oh, and the kid can't even talk yet either! It irks me!!! It is not in the true spirit of Halloween. To me, it makes them look like they are just greedy. Does this bother you too?
Also, I am curious about how you handle the trick-or-treaters that come to your home. Do you give treats to all? Do you withhold treats from those that are not in costume or say "trick-or-treat"?
Hope everyone has a Spooktacular Halloween!!!
So What Happened?™
First off, to clarify, since so many of you seemed to assume the worst, I said "it irks me" (kind of like a little pet peeve) NOT "it totally pisses off!!" I DO give out candy to everyone, and never said I didn't. Actually, I do it twice a year. Our family, (including extended family) all own RVs and will do a Halloween camp-out, at a campground were Saturday night there is trick-or-treating. Between both, we give out candy to probably close 200 kids, maybe even more. One year I actually counted and we had 78 trick-or-treaters come to our house. So obviously, I would not be buying that much candy if I didn't want to hand it out.
More points of clarification... I mentioned those that don't bother to dress up. I do not care how old you are, I would just like to see trick-or-treaters dressed up. It's great seeing teens all dressed up and trick-or-treating. It is the ones that don't even make an attempt at dressing up- no costume, no mask, nothing, heck, I have even seen them come around without a bag, they just put the candy in pockets or hold out their shirts to carry it. Those are the ones the ones that annoy me. Also, I love seeing all babies in costume. There are plenty of families where the little one is all dressed up and out with older siblings, but they do not have a bag and they are not collecting candy. That is fine. I have no problem with that. It is just when the kid can barely walk, let alone speak, and they come up with the parent. The parent then holds out the kids bag because the kid is too little to hold it himself. Really?!?!
I have heard others complain about the same kinds of things as well, so I was curious as to how many people felt the same way. Also, I know of someone who will not hand out candy unless you say "trick-or-treat". I wanted to know if others did things like that. Now I know. :-)
As for being shy, I know all about that. Growing up I was EXTREMELY shy, although not to the same extent, I still am. However, I don't believe that should be an excuse for not saying "trick-or-treat", at least as they get older. It doesn't have to be loud, but they should still be saying it. If they are really that shy, do they even want to go trick-or-treating? I believe that if it is something you really want, you should be willing to do the work. Part of trick-or treating is saying "Trick-or-Treat!!!"
My son was about 8mos on his first Halloween. We did dress him up, but he sat with us as we handed out candy. So everyone got to ooh and aah over him then. His second Halloween, he went trick-or-treating, but only to a handful of neighbors (whom we knew), then he helped hand out candy. Since then, he will trick-or-treat until he is ready to stop and then help hand out candy. When the time comes that he doesn't want to dress up, then he will not be allowed to go trick-or-treating.
Featured Answers
S.T. answers from Washington DC on October 15, 2011
i'm not the halloween police. the 'true spirit of halloween' can't really be quantified. i hand out candy to everyone who shows up (even teenagers not in costume who sneak back several times) and wish them all a happy halloween!
:) khairete
S.
10 moms found this helpful
S.H. answers from St. Louis on October 15, 2011
let's flip this one: my son was a big boy....& looked like a teenager when he was 10. This held true for many of his friends. Don't punish them for something that's out of their hands. Oh, & 2 of his friends were TALL! One of the girls was 5'8 by 11....& one of the boys was 5'10"! I consider age 11 still well-eligible for trickRtreating!
As for the not dressing up, I always discuss this with them & suggest they say that they're dressed up as "an obnoxious teenager"! Always gets laughs!
& I always offer a joke to the older kids.....& a "trickRtreat" to the little ones, always prompting a response! I never, ever withhold candy....
8 moms found this helpful
B.D. answers from Pittsburgh on October 15, 2011
I can find far better things to get bent about. I truly don't care how old the trick or treaters are or how they are dressed. I do appreciate when the teenagers are polite (and they always are). As for the ones that don't talk or choose not to, I assume they are shy and far be it from me to give them more reason to be shy.
8 moms found this helpful
More Answers
T.K. answers from Dallas on October 15, 2011
Halloween is supposed to be fun, for everyone. Not just the people on your approved list. Who cares if they say trick or treat? What differance does it make so long as they say thank you? If all of you aren't handing out candy out of joy and generosity, just stop. Turn your light off. We wont bother you.
I live in a very family friendly neighborhood. I like all the people around me. 4 yrs ago, I took my son out Trick or Treating when he was 10 mos old. He could barely walk. But he was adorable in his little costume. It was a great opportunity for me to get out and visit with the neighbors I knew and meet the ones I didn't already know. All the ladies hugged him and loved on him and I could see genuine joy in thier faces. He had a blast. He got to see all the differant Haloween decorations on the block up close. Got to pet peoples dogs and got a bunch of hugs and kisses out of the deal. No one was annoyed that he wouldn't be the one eating the candy. In fact, we went really early, got home, turned on our lights and gave that candy out to the next Trick or Treaters. Every year since I have taken him and his little sister out. I look forward to saying hi to some neighbors I only see once in a blue moon. It's a fun family activity, photo op, and memory. Why be saddled with a list of rules and expectations of other trick or treaters? Loosen up. Have some fun. Get into the spirit. Allow everyone the light of your generosity of spirit and loving nature. Not just those that fit your criteria.
17 moms found this helpful
L.U. answers from Seattle on October 15, 2011
I am one of those moms that dresses the baby up. I can't help it! She's so damn cute I just have to share it with everyone. lol I don't have her go to the door, she sits back while her brothers go, but there are always people that want to give her a little something. Or my boys when they were young. I think Tracy's idea of animal crackers is GREAT!
Personally, I hate all the teenagers that come to the door begging too....HOWEVER, I don't want my house egged, so they get A candy. :)
I would never withhold treats from a kid that wont say trick or treat. That's just mean. MOST kids are shy and get scared when they see someone they don't know just staring at them expectently.
Laura
11 moms found this helpful
S.T. answers from Washington DC on October 15, 2011
i'm not the halloween police. the 'true spirit of halloween' can't really be quantified. i hand out candy to everyone who shows up (even teenagers not in costume who sneak back several times) and wish them all a happy halloween!
:) khairete
S.
10 moms found this helpful
C.N. answers from Baton Rouge on October 15, 2011
I hand out candy to anyone who shows up. It's just freaking candy.
10 moms found this helpful
☆.A. answers from Pittsburgh on October 15, 2011
Well, I don't "penalize" the little ones for not being able to form the actual words, and I usually pick up some packs of goldfish crackers for the wee trick-or-treaters.
As for the older (not dressed up ones), truthfully, it doesn't bother me that much. They're out, they're participating, they are just getting to the age where they're goofballs that think on one hand they're too "cool" for Halloween, and young enough to be powerless to the lure of a Reese's Cup!
You have a 4-5 year old boy, right? Once he moves up a little into the radar of goof-ball stage--you'll relate better!
9 moms found this helpful
L.A. answers from Austin on October 15, 2011
I agree with Suz. I give candy because I want to. I do not judge. I love seeing the babies and their proud and excited parents. The teens, I just give them a few pieces, but the little ones, I give handfuls. I love how excited they are.
It is the spirit of it, not an application for employment.
It is kind of like Christmas.. Your child has a meltdown on Christmas Eve.. Do you really not give them their gifts from Santa?
On Halloween, it feels like a bizarre community celebration for the kids and young people. I love participating.
9 moms found this helpful
B.D. answers from Pittsburgh on October 15, 2011
I can find far better things to get bent about. I truly don't care how old the trick or treaters are or how they are dressed. I do appreciate when the teenagers are polite (and they always are). As for the ones that don't talk or choose not to, I assume they are shy and far be it from me to give them more reason to be shy.
8 moms found this helpful
S.H. answers from St. Louis on October 15, 2011
let's flip this one: my son was a big boy....& looked like a teenager when he was 10. This held true for many of his friends. Don't punish them for something that's out of their hands. Oh, & 2 of his friends were TALL! One of the girls was 5'8 by 11....& one of the boys was 5'10"! I consider age 11 still well-eligible for trickRtreating!
As for the not dressing up, I always discuss this with them & suggest they say that they're dressed up as "an obnoxious teenager"! Always gets laughs!
& I always offer a joke to the older kids.....& a "trickRtreat" to the little ones, always prompting a response! I never, ever withhold candy....
8 moms found this helpful
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