Too Soon? Meant to Be?

Jenny-

I too have faced alot of adversity in my last 2 years w/ my family. All I can say for sure is that, God will never give you more then you're capable of handling, whether that be a healthy pregnancy or not - he knows what you're made of - after all, he made you!

Good luck!

S.

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I also had a miscarriage at about 8 weeks back in March 2002. Actually, we had a problem with a condom too - I don't think they make them the way they used to. Anyway, by the time July rolled around, I was pregnant again. I made it through 2 trimesters with no problem. The 3rd trimester, however, the baby decided she wanted to try to come out a little earlier than expected. Starting at 32 weeks, I was in and out of the hospital getting turbutylene shots so stop contractions. I received steroid shots just in case the baby was born before 34 weeks - that is when the lungs are fully formed. My OB managed to keep me going until the 36th week and my youngest daughter was born naturally, although induced, in April 2003. Today she is a beautiful, outgoing, humorous little girl and even though I lost her sibling before her, I don't know what I would have done without her. (I also have a 6 year old girl.) In my heart, I know it was meant to be. I wouldn't have her if I had not lost her sibling. Both of my daughters are the light of my life, but the youngest has always been so much more affectionate and loving with me. She is constantly telling me she loves me, no matter where we may be.

Anyway, you asked if anyone waited less than two months and had a normal pregnancy. I did and the pregnancy helped me deal with my miscarriage. I'm not saying I am totally over it - who can get over the death of a child?, but I was able to accept it and move on. You have your faith to help you get through this. Just believe that everything will work out and just maybe it will.

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Hi!
I worked with someone who had a miscarriage and was pregnant LESS THAN A MONTH later........her baby girl is 5, beautiful and READ BOOKS at 4. Good luck doll!

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I have a friend who became pregnant right away after a miscarriage and her son is now 2 and thriving.
:)

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Hey,

I had a miscarriage last March and was preg. again in June after the doctor told me not to try for a while, I know that's longer than 2 months but we still were not supposed to be trying. Anyway, I waited until October to tell my doc and he was furious that I waited to tell him. He said that it would be much better to tell ASAP so that the mother and the baby are better taken care of. I would also wait until the end of the first trimester to tell because I know that it does hurt to have to "un tell" people. I hope this helps.

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I say, be thrilled! No one knows why most miscarriages happen and therefore, no one can say how best to treat your body afterward. I wish you all the best for an uneventful pregnancy.

Oh, and by the way -- my friend had a miscarriage, then was pregnant the next month and has a beautiful, strong baby boy!

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D. Sedler wrote:
> First thing, stay calm and relax... Be sure that you are entertaining,
> as few feelings of tension and stress as possible. This can have a
> big effect on the strength of the baby in these early stages. Just
> think of how wonderful everything can be with you and your baby. Hope
> for the best and dream about it. This will help more than you think.
> Good luck and I will be praying for you!
>
> My OBGYN told me that after his first child he and his wife didn't
> even make the full month mark before they were trying for their second
> child. So if he thought it was ok to start that early, then it
> probably is. Be sure to enjoy all of this experience.

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Hi J.. I haven't been in your situation and don't know anyone who has, but I would like to share two pieces of advice with you. First, at this point, the most probable cause of any complications in your pregnancy will come from stress... that constant nervousness you feel at every little twinge. I know it's easier said than done, but do your best to relax and not stress out. Obviously, you are a fellow believer in God and the power of prayer. So I second what your paster said that this is in God's hands, and He know best. Any time and effort you spend worrying will not improve your situation, and may make it worse.

And I think you should tell your church family and ask them to keep you in their prayers. Nothing in the universe is more powerful than prayer except for God Himself, so don't withhold any of that power from your situation. And besides, even if by some long shot your worse fears came true, you would need that church family to support you and help you through that time. But with their prayers, I believe you won't have to worry about that again. Just leave this in God's hands. He's the only one that can do anything right now anyway, right?

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Well I know you have probaly spoken to the midwifes by now and they have probably told you that everything is o.k but I thought I would introduce myself and give you a little of my backround.
I too have suffered miscarriages,3 to be exact and really 4 losses all together. I miscarried 2 between 2-3mths., 1 @ 17wks., and then my son had a twin that the Dr. says I lost somewhere around 8-9wks. My point really is that you are not alone in the struggle. I am contemplating having another or atleast trying since my son(Elijah) is now 26mths old. I have been tested for everytrhing known to man and there is nothing physically wrong to indicate why the miscarriages continued to happen. I know all too well what it means when someone says it's just God's will. It still doesn't take your pain away. Hopefully you can ask your Dr. to do an ultrasound earlier to check on the baby or make sure you get you HCG level checked wkly to make sure your level is rising and the baby is doing o.k. I though you might like to know that a complete stranger is praying for you and your baby to be safe and everything to turn out well.
Take care, Shelle'

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I am a firm believer that God allows everything to happen in our lives for a reason, and I know it's scary, but this baby will be one of the biggest blessings of all. I am the mother of three and they were all born in the last three and a half years. Our two youngest are a year and two and a half weeks apart. They were both very big suprises, but I wouldn't trade them for anything. I never miscarried, so I won't say I know what you're going through, but all three of my pregnancies had complications and my last one I spent two months on bedrest to try to prevent a miscarriage, thank God she was beautifully healthy. I will add you to my prayer list and will pray that God will calm your nerves and give you His peace and that everything will smooth out and be ok. Feel free to e-mail me if you just need to tell somebody what you are feeling (____@____.com), it helps cause sometimes mommies try too hard to hold things in and take care of everything ourselves.

A.

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I just wanted to say I will pray for you and your pregancy. Mostly for God's will to be done, and for you and your family to have the strength to carry that out..
I wish you luck!

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I had a miscarriage in January of 2003 had 1 period in feb. and forund out i was preggo in march. My baby was born at 33 weeks but that was not because of the miscarriage. GOOK LUCK AND CONGRATS.

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The two months is so that your body has time to heal and you can heal emotionally, not because this is a ground rule and you must stick by it or everything will not go well. I agree with your pastor some things are meant to happen, and you better stop stressing about it, that can be the worst thing for a pregnancy. Trust and rest that you are ok and that everything will work out to the best. Don't dwell in what happened with your last pregnancy, but relax and let this one do what it is going to do. I had a friend who within 2 years had 9 miscarriages and went on to have a perfectly normal, adorable baby boy after that, so you really never know. just relax and take good care of yourself, sometimes it is the best thing.

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I too had a miscarriage. I miscarried twins last year and I was about 9 weeks. I had to have a D&C and afterward I had a followup which I'm thinking was about 2 to 4 weeks later. My doctor said that it was fine for my husband and I to begain immediately trying to conceive. we now are pregnant again and I am about 4 months, and even though I try not to worry I too cringe at every little pain or ache. I think that is normal after expereincing a miscarriage. I say to you thank GOD for your pregnancy and just take each day one day at a time because everything is in GOD's hands. Congratulations

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hello my name is K. i work on the mother baby floor at forsyth medical center and i have talked to alot of mothers that have had miscarriages and didnt wait the two months and got pregnet and every thing was ok,im very sorry for you loss its very hard just take it one day at a time and good luck with everything,I agree with your pastor somethings are meant to be. If god wants you to be preganet you will no matter what kind of birth control or any thing,Ive taken care of a mother one day and she was going to have a tubal done and it was her second one so its all in gods hands.

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Dear J.,

I have a dear friend who went through a very similar situation and her son is now 5 years old. I'll pray for y'all!

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My daughter had the same type of thing happen and she has a sweet..grin... healthy little boy..who is now 6 years so what your pastor says is so true its in the hands of the Lord..
The only thing I can say other is just make sure you get right away good prenatal care from a good GYN high risk doctor..and just think good thoughts for all that happens is good when there is faith in the Lord.
Bless you and your sweet family

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I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. I understand your feelings of fearing another disappointment. I'm not sure if it was your first loss, but something that I was told is very common in women our age. Of course when the doctor told me that, I felt he was being cold and insensitive to my feelings since I was horrified and completely devastated. That was back in 2001. Since then I've had 6 pregnancies in total with only one resulting in a beautiful normal baby girl.
All 5 of my miscarriages were in the first trimester. In all of my experiences, it is not a "baby" in medical terms until it reaches 16 weeks gestation. So during the first trimester, the most common reason a pregnancy fails is because biologically something is wrong with the development of the fetus. That does not necessarily mean something is wrong with you. Does that help someone deal with a loss easier? Not sure, it depends on the person. Emotionally, it did not help but I understood medically. All I needed was a caring physician to have faith in me that I could produce a normal pregnancy and support my efforts to do so. That meant more to me than medical statistics. I do still want one more child and I've no plans to stop trying even though I'm 35.
J., I support your efforts in wanting to be a mother again. I understand your emotional pain. You have every right to feel the way that you do. Your pastor is right that it is in god's hands right now. The best you can do is focus on your 20 month old daughter who loves and needs your attention now. She is real and in your life. Focus on the joys of becoming a mother again and adding to your loving family. You'll be amazed at how healing even a 20 month old baby can be for you. I wish you the best. Thoughts and prayers are with you.
~L.

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I got pregnant way less then 2months since my D&C techinally I t was 4 wks. I am now due JAN 22. Everything has been perfect so far. If you want to talk more send me a message.