Toddler Won't Stay in His Own Bed

Is he still getting a nap during the day? It may be time to give up the nap. I know it may seem early, but he will probably sleep better during the night. You can have a "quiet time" during the day instead where you can read books, do a puzzle, or something where he is still and calm. This worked well for us, right about when our daughter was 3. Another idea...put a digital clock in his room and put tape over the minutes numbers and teach him to not come out of his room until the hours number is 7 or whatever time you desire, we did this with our daughter as well, because she is an early riser, and it worked also! Lastly...we don't "force" her to go to sleep if she's not tired at her bedtime, but she does have to be in her bed, so we let her look at books or play with her leappad, as long as she is in bed. She usually falls asleep within a half hour. Hope some of those things help! Good Luck!

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You are doing absolutely right by taking him right back to his bed and not letting him climb in with you (that would only lead to worse problems). One thing that will probably get him staying in his room quickly is if when he comes to get you, you simply take him back without talking to him/hugging/kissing/carrying, etc (anything that gives attention positive or negative). Once he learns that you are going to ignore him and just lead him back to bed, it will be boring to get up. Since he just climbs over the gate, you might consider getting rid of it. That way there is no risk of him getting hurt in the process. Once my son learned we were not going to give him attention, within 2 or 3 days he was staying in his room. He did decide to test us every couple of months for a while, but as long as we were consistant in that we spoke not a word, didn't pick him up...only helped him to climb into bed by offering a hand to hold onto for balance...then he just gave it up and went right to bed. Now he is 4 and when we say bed time, he just runs and climbs in on his own. He will even do that in the middle of the night if something wakes him up. We just say it's not time to get up yet, and he puts himself back to bed and goes back to sleep. I never expected that to happen. LOL Good luck. I know it's frustrating. The first few nights it seemed like as soon as i was at his door, he was climbing out of bed again, but i never showed my frustration and if my DH could tell i was getting too frustrated to not say anything for much longer, he came to my rescue and continued for me.

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We had similar issues (our little girl was getting out and playing while we were still up). I finally put a door-knob cover on the inside of the door and it works perfectly. She did start panicking that she could go potty if she needed to so my husband had the genius idea of putting her little potty in her room. She's happy, we're happy and most of all she's safe and can go potty (which she does most nights). I hope this helps. I know I was wishing she still had a crib for a couple weeks there. ;-)

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S.,

Have you tried moving the gate high enough that he can't climb over, but low enough he can't crawl under? Does he want a drink of water? or had a bad dream? I'd start thinking about the **why** of his nightly visits.

M.

You've got some great responses so far, and I have another one for you. Since your son is climbing over one gate, maybe you could stack a second gate on top of the first gate. My cousin had to do that with her son, and it worked. He wasn't able to climb oiver two gates because they were too high!

Put a gate on your door that may work!!

S.,
When our boys hear,"don't get into _____, stay out of ____", it's like a magnet for them. I would take down the gate. In my opinion he is getting a bad message from this and getting into bed with you is either a comfort for him or an "up yours, I can get through the gate any way." Try keeping it down and softly telling him each night,"Mommy and daddy are right here in our room if you need us. You are safe."

Our youngest has always loved sleeping in his own big boy bed, but our oldest would fall asleep in ours. (My husband worked nights.) I feel that it was a comfort issue and the feeling of safety because daddy wasn't home. Now that my husband works days, both boys stay in their beds and don't even come down to our room.

It takes time, but just have patience.

Cheers.

we had this same problem with my son about that age. We put up a chart and every time he stayed in his bed the WHOLE night he got to put a star on his chart, if he did it 2 nights in a row the first time he got a little something special (we used hotwheels) and then the next time it was 4 days in a row then a suprise, then it was a 7 days and so on until it was to weeks in a row and then he was just doing it and was so proud of himself we got to take the chart down. Good Luck!

I would first suggest takin down the gate as it isn't doing any good. Second, I would continue being consistent with taking him back to bed when he gets up.

I think it is completley normal for a 3 yr old to get up and seek the comfort/attention of their parents. My daughter's imagination started really working around this time and she would hear a noise and become frightened resulting in a visit to our room. I would always reassure her that everything was fine and tuck her back into bed.

This will pass, but I think it is important to really listen to WHY they are getting out of bed. Now my daughter (almost 4) gets out of bed to go potty and on occasion if something is bothering her.

I wouldn't lock my child in their room, even if I could hear her . . . I try to put myself in her place knowing I couldn't get out if I needed my mom or dad.

Take the gate down and keep up on the consistancy. You might also want to try a stuff animal that they are in charge of being a good daddy to and staying in bed with.

Lock your door at night. He might pound on it, or he might just go back to bed. We do that some with our almost 3-year-old, and he usually just goes back to bed. For bed time, we actually have their doorknob turned around so that we can lock them in, as I'm not interested in chasing them back in for two hours every night. We unlock it before we go to bed.

S.:

I don't know if this will help or not but we had the same problem when our son who is almost 2 1/2 moved to his toddler bed about four months ago. We finally ended up getting on of those railings you would put on say a twin bed if they were too small so they wouldn't fall off the high bed. We wedged it under his mattress and it made the one side tilt a little but he can still sleep. This actually solved the problem. What he really wanted was the security of the railing like he had in his crib to snuggle up against at night. Now if he does wake up and comes into us it is usually not before 6:30 in the morning after he has slept almost the whole night through.

J.