Toddler Screams All Day Long!

What I have found to work is to Whisper. when he is screaming respond in a whisper... he will want to hear you and will stop screaming to do so, then in a whisper explain about not screaming. also is it possible that with the new baby and ajustments he is only getting your undivided attention when he is screaming? if it works he will continue the behavior

The best way to let him know that this is unacceptable is to ignore him when he screams. Get on his level and make eye contact and say use your words. If he wants a cup you tell him to say cup if he refuses and screams just walk away. It will make him angry but that is part of the process. So when he is screaming and pointing to something just tell him to use his words and then if he continues to scream just walk away do not give him what he wants. A few times of him not getting what he wants through screaming he will realize that this is not the way he needs to communicate to get what he wants. If he is not communicating well yet then just say show mommy what you want and do not scream. If he screams walk away if not take his hand and let him show you what he wants.
Good luck!!

He is screaming out of frustration. He wants things, but cant communicate, so he screams and this gets your attention. Hey it works!! so why not keep doing it? This will be hard but you must stick to it and his screaming will stop. Tell him ONCE to stop and then ignore him when he screams. He will scream louder for sure. Turn away and continue to ignore him. He will probably jump on you, turn your head and walk away. Soon he will dissolve into tears and at that point cuddle him and tell him to SHOW you what he wants. Take him by the hand and lead him to where he was when he started screaming and tell him to point. Then ask him if he wants the cup, cracker, toy etc. Hand him the cup and repeat cup. Ask him if he can say cup and explain to him that you will NOT EVER give him something if he screams. Stick to it even though its easier at first to give in.

I'm not sure I agree with the ignoring tactic at this age. When they're older, yes, but he is only 19 months, and doesn't know how to communicate yet. That doesn't mean you have to give in to the screams, but you need to teach him how to use his words instead. So if he's screaming because he wants a drink, say to him, "Say 'Milk, please.'" And repeat that over and over until he says it. If he's mad because you said no, teach him to say "I'm upset." And then praise him like crazy for using his words. Good luck.

Ignore his when he screams and don't give in when he does.

Nanc

Hi S.,
I feel your pain. We have been working on this one with our 10 year old for the past 10 years :)
I think it started when my husband yelled at her sometimes as a young child. We have forever been talking about using an inside voice, suggesting stress lowering activities, etc. I have come to accept that perhaps this is just her personality...she is exceptionally bright (best reader and speller in her class), and very self-motivated. It can become a trial to live with her though, and I try to exhibit behavior that she can model from (I try not to yell, and I also let her know that it is unacceptable to behave in such a manner - suggesting she take walks, go to her room for a cool-down, etc.). Luckily your son is young. It sounds like maybe the sibling rivalry is causing him to scream to get attention. Calmly and quietly let him know (every time he screams) that it is not acceptable behavior and that he can talk to you in a normal voice to get what he wants. If you keep your cool, he'll be more likely to. :) Best of luck!
G.

Hi S.. I agree, ignoring the screams is the way to go. One thing though...you mentioned that you have a 2 month old. Obviously you are still adjusting. I remember when I brought my second home. it was really tough. One thing that's good to do is just to assess the amount of time and attention you are giving him. Is the screaming the only time he's getting your full attention? A lot of times kids will resort to any type of attention, even if it's negative attention just to have us looking at them and interacting. It's a lot to juggle a newborn and a toddler, but maybe you could try to get some alone time with him and really just play or read or whatever...then the ignoring of the screams will really have more of an impact. I hope that helps. And hang in there. It's a really big transition, but it will get easier and easier and they will be great friends someday, even though it seems impossible at the moment!! :) God bless.