To Use or Not to Use the Same Names as Friends/acquaintances

Hi there You name your baby what u want. Who cares what other people think. S.

T.,
I completely understand your situation!! I really think it is quite common. My response is to name your baby WHATEVER you want.
I have two children and both names weren't even on our "list" when we went into the hospital. We came up with their names on the way OUT the door.
In the case with my son, we got the name from some dear friends who came to visit us in the hospital. They had a 3 mo. old and the name just worked for us. The mom wasn't offended, she actually thought it was great that they had helped "inspire" us with the name. ;-)
Go with your gut and consult your husband. It is a decision only you two can make...so go with what is right for the two of you.
If you think that you will offend, then talk to your friends...

Maybe you could talk one on one to your friends who have kids named the same as what you want to name yours. You could tell them you have several names picked out for your baby and one of them happens to be the same name as their child. Ask them how they feel about it. If someone did that to me, I would appreciate it. I think if someone wanted to name their daughter the same first name as mine, I'd be okay. I might be a little uncomfortable if it was the same first and middle name. You might also be able to agree that they'll be called different nicknames. For example, if you both have a daughter named Elizabeth, you could agree that one will be Liz and one will be Beth. Something like that! Hope it helps.

Use whatever name you wish. It is your baby. I think the only difficulty is the same name in an immediate family such as your brother or sister's kids having the same as yours.

Good luck.

We also kept all three of our kid's names a secret. It's more fun.

This issue bothers me. NO ONE OWNS A NAME. You want to name your child John or Jane or whatever,go ahead. It is your choice. And those who become upset about using "their name" are ridiculous!! The name you give a child normally "fits" to them. I can't imagine our boys being named anything else. Their names just fit them so right. Yes, there is a boy named very similiar to our youngest and he was born only a few weeks before ours. Big deal. I've never been one to have the feelings that I am stealing another person's name for the child. Actually, my husband and I agreed to name our boys after people we knew out of respect for them!

So my advice to everyone, is to name your children the names you feel would fit your child. We used the old technique when I was pregnant, of pretending to be upset with the child and saying the full name out loud. If it sounded right, we used it! LOL!!

Best Wishes,

J. Hobbs

Hi T.,
I think you should definitely use the names that you've had picked out and not worry about what your friends think. It's a very important decision, and hopefully your friends will be happy to hear that they get to share their child's name with a couple as great as you:)
Sincerely, B.

If the kids will be in the same class I would not name them the same names. Or if it is a really unusual name then I wouldn't use it if others close to you have used it. I live in a fairly small town and there are other kids in town with the same names as mine but none are close friends or close in age.

Is there naming ettiquite? This is your child. If it has a different spelling (that isn't crazy) you could do that to ease your decision. You have different last name, there are always two kids in school that have the same names. I don't think it is an issue. If you love the name, go for it. Your friends should be honored and excited for you not irritated.
When I had my daughter I named her Maceyn, Macey for short. I still remember someone saying "Oh, so and so was going to name her daughter that when she was born, she has planned on that name forever". Like I had stolen her name. I was like whatever...anyway my point is. Macey and Maci are now in the the same school, they are in the same class and no one is missing any identity or worried about who is named what, they just play together and have fun. So whats in a name?

I suggest you think about your little one (who actually has to live with the name). If your family spends a lot of time with these other families, when (s)he gets older your child my not enjoy having to share his/her name.

My fiance and I just went through that with our 3rd. We ended up with a name that a few of our friends had picked out also. It really depends on how much you like the name. You said you've had the name picked out for a while, then keep it. If it is that imprtant to you then name your kid the same name but maybe change it up a little in the way you spell it. Or you could change part of the name. Our son's name is Brayden and my sister in law is thinking about naming her baby Kaden. I think they are both beautifull names and they are pretty similar. Good Luck!!

T.

Unless you and dad just put a bunch of letters together and call it a name your chances of naming your baby the same as friends is likely. AND what difference does it make?? A name is a way of identifying your child for years to come. If you are not using a family name and have fallen hard on a name of a friend's child......so what?? I work in a local hospital and see a lot of the same names at one time. Unfortunately.......there are names of the time and that's hard to avoid. My daughters came into their names in a way that were unique to them however and it was just our choice.The oldest one has a feminine version of her gpa on her dad's side and the 2nd one my husband gave me 2 names to pick from and by the time the 3rd one made her appearance,I decided a boy wasn't to be so she became the feminine of the boy name I had picked. They are respectively:Robyn, Melissa ( Missy by her choice) and Andrea ( dislike the name Andrea but figured I'd never get the boy I wanted!!!) And believe me as I stated they will make their name want they want. Pick a name you want and don't worry who thinks what. It is simply your choice of what you like in names. And no explaining to anyone if you don't want how you came up with the name!!!!! PS I did finally get my son and he is Dennis ( my last available boy name) and carries my maiden name as his middle name,which is very befitting. Do you remember Dennis Mitchell aka Dennis the Menace??? Concentrate on getting your baby here and it is healthy. Forget the naming business as that isn't the most important.

Use the name you love. You'll be saying it a hundred times a day. You'll be loveing it for years and years. Those friends may come and go but your named child is yours forever. My 1 year old's name is Connal. My husband loved it and I had never heard it. Knowing that everyone will miss spell and miss pronounce it didn't stop us from using it and I'm glad. It is easy for me to sing to him using his name because we love it so much!! Good luck!

A girl I used to work with named her son Christian, which is my oldest son's name. I teased her a tad about it, but I guess I just talked about him to much at work and the name wore off on her! I thought it was cool she named her son the same as mine! Of course I don't work there anymore, and hardly see her. But I thought it was neat.... There are always different spellings, and unless you are or have been best friends for a long time, don't worry about what name you choose! I prolly would never name my kids the same as any of my 3 closet friends since HS have used I know that. But somebody I've just met along the way... why not!

Are you telling your friends the name you picked for the baby if so dont tell anyone the names your thinking of, keep it to yourself of the names ur thinking of naming the baby, only way to not have ur friends steal the names.

How many "Amanda"s did you know growing up? Or "Dave"s? Name your baby what you want! You might not even know these other people in three years.

I have a real good friend and had my daughter first and she turned around and named her daughter the same name. The middle name of course is different and we live in different states now and are kids aren't around each other. However I was upset at first but then i thought what is the big deal. Use the name you want and don't let anyone tell you different. First baby should be what the two of you want that person to grow up to be/called. Good luck and do what you feel is right for you guys. If they are truly good firends they won't mind they may honored. Just my thoughts

I say go for whatever you want! I knew I wanted to name my daughter Emma when my husband and I first got married. We knew 5 of them when we named her. But we never see any of them. Maybe once a year and I still love her name!

If the friend is someone you would see a lot I don't think it would be a good idea to name your child the same as theirs but if you don't socialize much with those people then go for it. My daughter asked her friend if she minded that they use a derivitive of her childs name & she didn't mind at all - she even said they could use the same name. She only sees them occasionaly so it doesn't matter.

I'd name your baby whatever you want to name him/her. Names aren't a "first come, first serve" or "finders-keepers" sort of thing. It's not rude or uncreative, it's what you really want, and it's your baby. I say go for it!

Also, I totally agree about not sharing the name... we never, ever tell our friends the names we are thinking about. We don't want them to steal them. =p It's top-secret stuff. :)

We loved the name Lucus and we were all set on this name then a couple from our church named their little boy that so we switched to Addison which means Son of Adam (my husbands name). Now the new thing is to name your girls that. My poor son is going to go to school and have all these little girls named the same thing. What I am getting at is it shouldn't matter. If you pick a common name then they are more then likely going to run into someone with that name anyway. Needless to say in the end the couple from church quit coming to church and now we really don't talk to them much so Lucus would have worked. Go with your heart.

A good friend of mine used our name (and spelling) from our first daughter...but it was her 4th child - she simply told me what they were planning to do. Quite honestly, I was flattered. We live in different states and I've learned you may not be friends w/everyone forever, but your children are with you forever! You have to do what you want to do - it's your child's name...it's pretty significant!
good luck!

You never know what is in store for the future. You might move away or your friends might move away. If that is the case then it wouldn't matter if your kids had the same name. My advice - name your children what you want to name them and don't worry about anyone else! Good luck! :-)

I think you should name them whatever you want, who cares what anyone else thinks about it. I names my daughter Kaitlin and my son Kaleb, I have found 2 sets of siblings with identical names! Oh well, it's not about them, it's about your baby so who cares?

Hi T.,
I had a daughter 15 years ago and i had planned on a boy. her name was to be Aidan James, but it ended up to be Jordan Cantrell. My boy was born 13 years later and he is Now Aidan James. We had a lady that lived down the street with a daughter 2 years younger than mine, her name was Jordan and she had a boy and named it Aidan James. Just name your baby what you want! It has a meaning to you and your hubby, it will be with you forever and you never want a regret on something so important.
K.

I see nothing wrong with using the same names. If at all possible though, change up the spelling to make it unique for your child. Like for a girl, Siera or Ciara maybe. My sons name is Landon, but another boy at his daycare is Landan. So be creative, and don't share your choices with anyone! When I was little growing up, I wanted to name my son Devin Tyler, well my older sister name her son that name. You can't trust anyone with the name of your choice! Good Luck!

I agree about not telling anyone the names until after the birth.
I'd go with the name that you like. You never know if you'll move, they'll move, etc. If they were your friends, it shouldn't matter. I'm sure you'll laugh about it later.

Someone I worked with loved my sons name and asked me if I minded if she used the same name. My son is a year old and she is pregnant now. I have to say that it bothered me. I don't know why but it did. I told her I didn't mind, but what do you say. My husband and I thought long and hard to find a name that you don't hear very often. But in the end it is your baby and you have to be happy with the name and not worry about what other people think.

T.,
My parent's best friends gave their daughter the same name and I have. We grew up as C. sue and C. diane, it worked for us and we still refer to each other that way. I think there must have been 25 C.'s in my graduation class (anyone female born in the 50's I think had a pretty good chance at being named 'C.')and 2 of my best friends through school had that name. I think my parents were honored to have their friends choose a name they liked and it never bother us growing up. Go for it and name you child whatever name you and your husband want.
C.

I would name your child what you want. When I was pregnant, I was going to name her Ashley. But at that time there were a zillion Ashley's and I didn't want her to be one of the crowd. So I ended up naming her a name that no one else had and I got compliments all the time. Do what you feel is right, but in my case, I just wanted her to be original. And to this day, I have only heard one other person named her same name. Some people will probably think you copied, and that's their opinion.

Please look at the initials of each name---Andy Nathan Thomas becomes ANT. Then the name should be shouted from the back door. Also be warned a cute corruption of his first name could stay with him the rest of his life. In my sons case William became Wilky. Good Luck

I say choose a name that you love, and if anyone else has chosen that name well so be it. My name is S., and I have had plenty of friends named S., as it is a very common name. There was not one time I thought it was odd to have a friend with the same name. And the same goes for my hubby, his name is Daniel. And just this year our oldest son, Kaleb, met a new friend in school with his name, only spelled Caleb instead. He actually thought it was really cool that he and his friend had the same name. So pick your name and don't worry so much if someone else has chosen it, and if you want it to be unique you can always change the spelling so that it won't be exactly the same(don't go over board on the spelling though lol, your child will still have to learn how to spell his or her name, and you don't want that to be a difficult task). Our oldest childs middle name is Mikel(pronounced like Michael). So have fun with it and congrats on your pregnancy!

I think it kind of depends on your list. You can't "reserve" 10 boy names and 10 girl names and expect no one to use any of the names your "thinking about".

I think it would be TOTALLY different if you had decided on a specific name for a girl and one for a boy and they took that. But you can't make an entire list and expect to hold all those names. By just throwing names out there doesn't mean others can't use those names.

Plus, I would not let your friends see the list anymore OR better yet...decide on a name and tell everyone we are naming our child this...if someone thinks about using it just kindly say...you know we have chosen that name and it might be akward for our kids to have the exact same name since we are friends.

Its your baby and your family...name them what ever YOU want. Truth is my name is K. and my mom named me that because she didnt know any one who had named their kiddo that- until I got to school and there were 7 K.'s in my class.just because your friends named their child a name doesnt mean its off limits. Its your baby and a name is something they will have all their lives. Dont opt for something else just beacuse some one else really liked that name also - just means some one else agrees thats a great name! Congrats on your first baby! you are going to love every minute of it!

My next door neighbor was pregnant the same time I was (she was due 2 months before me). We had discussed names, and I told her our "top pick"...we knew we were having a boy, they were going to be "surprised" at the birth. Well, imagine my surprise when a couple months later there was a "welcome home" sign across her garage with MY BABY BOY'S NAME emblazoned for all to see!!!! Seriously. The first AND middle name. She stole them both. Of course we had to pick a new name, which luckily we have now decided fits our son much better than the first choice would have! If we have a third I will keep the name TOP SECRET!!!!

Anyway, had we not lived next door, we would have probably gone ahead and used the name. If the kids won't be seeing each other every day who cares? But, if you do want to use a name that a friend already has, I think it would be nice to tell them...they will probably be flattered thinking that you like the same name!