Thumb Sucking 5 Year Old

Hi M.,

I have a 5 year old son who sucks his thumb. I have no issues with it. I have always liked that he has a built in way to comfort himself. He is very tall for his age though and when he was three, people were guessing him to be in the 1st and 2nd grade. To spare him funny looks, I made a rule when he turned four that he is only allowed to suck his thumb in OUR house and car. That seemed to help. He used to suck his thumb whenever he wasnt talking and now he mainly does it when he is tired or really comfy (family movie night or when we cuddle).

To be clear, I didn't tell him WHY I made the rule. I don't want him to be self-concious about his height. As far as he knows it's better to suck your thumb in your own comfortable places.

Hope that helped a little bit. Good Luck.

My daughter is 4 and she sucks her fingers. At her last dental visit the dentist said that she was sucking so hard that she was altering the roof of her mouth and would need an appliance to reshape it as well as braces. She said that it was still early enough that if she would stop the appliance may be avoided. So here is what we did. My daughter has wanted a fish for about a year now so I told her that if she WANTED to stop sucking her fingers she could get a fish. If she didn't suck for a week then we would get the fish tank then after another week we would get stuff to go in the tank after another week we would get a plant and fill it with water. After a full 4 weeks of not sucking we would get the fish. We agreed that the only time she could suck her fingers was when she was in bed. Glad to report she got her fish this week. The first 4 days were the hardest. She did get really upset in the car but I always told her that it was her choice she could suck but that it would take longer to get the fish. We made lots of trips to the pet store to let her look and keep her encouraged. After the first week she no longer complained about wanting to suck her fingers. Also durring the times she was most likely to want to suck her fingers I gave her gum. She had a pack of gum next to her car seat and one by her chair when she watched TV. She went through alot of gum at first but now doesn't chew much at all. Sorry this was so long but I am very proud of how she did. But it was always her choice. I know she still sucks in her sleep but the rest of the time she no longer sucks so in time maybe we will try to stop the night time sucking. Good luck.

We need to get our daughter to stop sucking her thumb because it had changed the shape of her teeth and was causing major problems with her speech and bite. I bought a product called "Stop The Bite" by Hoof at Wal-Mart. It is in the nail care isle and costs less than $3.00. We set a goal of six weeks and if she stopped sucking her thumb by then she got to get a manicure. You can still use the six months/ear piercing, but give her a short term goal reward as well. And I agree, give her back the stuffed animal. Don't nag her or punish her for set backs. That advice came from our dentist. Think of how hard it is for you to break a habit. You might try doing this with her. Find a bad habit of yours and try to break it while she tries to break hers. You can encourage and support each other. And you can celebrate together when you both succeed. Best of luck to you both.
P. S. My daughter stopped sucking her thumb almost immediately after we applied the product and today she is healthy, happy and has beautiful nails.

Hello M.,

This is one of those situations where decreasing the pressure to make her stop will very likely help her to stop! As you noted, trying to make her stop by taking away her favorite animal only made her suck her thumb more. This is probably a self-soothing behavior, and taking away her toy was probably somewhat upsetting. She will grow out of the thumb-sucking as she learns other ways to regulate and sooth herself. Lessening the pressure, whether it is by punishment or reward, will probably be helpful. Good luck!

Our daughter also wanted to have her ears pierced and we used it as an incentive to stop sucking her thumb. But we waited until SHE wanted to stop sucking her thumb. That way we knew we wouldn't be taking away something that she really needed. She was in 4th grade and was getting embarrassed. The pierced ears was a perfect incentive. Once she could go a week without sucking her thumb, she got her ears pierced. I think it was a good time too for the piercing as she was old enough to do all the cleaning herself.

I sucked my thumb until I was about 12, yep 12! All my friends knew I sucked my thumb and I was never emabarassed about it, it was very comforting and made me feel safe. My mom never tried to get me to stop.

She did take me to the orthodontist who said my teeth would most likely be fine (you can fix those anyway). That was her only concern.

Now that I have girls I know I want them to feel safe and secure. My eldest had a binkie until she was 2 1/2 and carried a blanket for just as long. She still HAS to have a blaket in the car. My youngest loves to carry around socks (she is nine months old and will be carrying socks until she decides she does not need them) I think making it a big deal causes children to hang on to it longer.

My daughter sucked her thumb and we got her to stop when she was about 3 or so. The dentist gave us 3 months or he told her he'd have to put an appliance in her mouth. We got a book called "Harold's Hideway Thumb". We had her help think of ways to keep her thumb out of her mouth - put a string/ribbon on it, a glove, etc. Nighttime was the hardest, since she didn't realize she was doing it. We also got some liquid to put on the thumb, I think it was called "Thumb", ask a pharmacist if you can't find it. We told her how awful it was - and she was too afraid of what it might taste like that she didn't put her thumb in her mouth. It did take about 3 months. She also had a stuffed animal that we let her keep. Maybe let her have the stuffed animal- just put a glove on her hand, or ace bandage on the elbow like someone else mentioned. Good luck.

I agree with Vera.

Lessen the pressure. Give her back the favorite stuffed animal and see if the thumb sucking decreases. Next time she visits the dentist, see if there is an issue with her palette. Chances are there isn't.

I have a just turned five year old who sucks her right hand pointer finger, turning her hand upside down to do it. She has done this before she was born. We also have an ultrasound photo of her doing this. I only recently found the photo again, and it sure explained this to me, so to speak.

It is a way to self-comfort, and will lead into other ways to do so. Without pressuring her on our part, we've noticed a VERY slight decrease in frequency over time.

Peer pressure will eventually cause my daughter, and your daughter, to cease doing so.

Our dentist isn't worried, and is keep a hawk's eye on her palette which is unaffected.

If it goes on long enough (when she has her adult teeth) our plan with the dentist is to put into the roof of her mouth a thumb sucking device, which makes it uncomfortable and breaks the habit then without pressure.

The only time we don't let our daughter suck her finger is at the table.

I have a 5-year-old who sucks her thumb, too. When she was 4, I told her she'd have to stop sucking it during the day when she turned 5, that she could only suck her thumb in bed at night. She accepted this, and actually looks forward to going to bed so she can suck her thumb! Talk about killing two birds with one stone. I still see her doing it during the day from time to time, and just remind her that she has to wait until bedtime, and she takes her thumb out. She grumbles once in a while, but most of the time she's okay with the rule.

Good Luck M.!

Our daughter is 20 yrs old and getting married in December and she still sucks her thumb....with her ratty torn up baby blanket ???? Amazingly, she has beautiful straight teeth.
When she was younger we used a OTC liguid and "oainted" it on her thumb. I think it was for stopping nail biting. Anyway it tasted awful, so she stopped sucking. I put the blanket away (should have tossed it) and she found it months later and starting sucking again....??? I've since found out that many "adults" have this habit and other than dental problems, it's not really a big deal. We used to tease her that she would walk down the wedding aisle sucking her thumb.....we must of jinxed ourselves, her wedding is in December.

Be careful with bribes, they usually cause anxiety which will make your child want to suck more.

Good Luck!

thumb sucking is a self soothing mechanism that babies use but as they get older it just becomes a habit... My advice is a little hard but it is prolly necessary at this age. It is kinda like when a kid touches the stove, well it is hot and it hurt so they learn that if they touch it, it will burn and cause pain therefore they do not continue to do it, Hopefully! Well there is a product that is called "Thumb" funny name right? lol Well it is for that very same thing. My mom actually used it for me when I was a child to stop me from bitint my nails. Basically you are going to "Paint her nails" with it, Pretend on the other ones but just use it for her thumbs. When she sticks it in her mouth it will taste HORRIBLE and after a few times she will learn that everytime she sucks her thumb it will not be as enjoyable as it used to be. Some moms even use this for gettin the baby off the breast. I hope that it does not have the cayenne pepper it used to have cause that can burn a bit. So you may want to dilute it but it is safe and you can find it at walgreens in the Baby section. Hope this helps!

Best of Luck!
S.
*New Twin Mommmy*

My mom used ear piercing to get my sister (who was in 3rd grade) to stop sucking her thumb, and it worked! She made me stop biting my nails to get mine done. Good luck!

That may work,let her know only big girls get there ears done so she can come to realize BIG girls don't suck on there thumbs.I have never had this issue so I'm tad lucky id say,all my boys ever wanted was blanket or toy ,well good luck

Okay...some Moms are going to say this is torture but this is how we got my son to stop when he was 5 years old (the thumbsucking was altering the shape of his mouth).

It took 3 days (we did it over a weekend). We wrapped ACE bandages around both elbows. It would not allow him to bend his arms to get his thumb into his mouth. Everytime he had the urge he couldn't do it. After three days we took them off and if he went to put his thumb back in his mouth we would tell him he would have to wear the bandages again. He never sucked again.

He still twiddles his ear (he used to do this while sucking) as a sleepy time soothing thing.

We gave him a big reward after he went a week without sucking (I think it was a video game he wanted).

Good luck. Sometimes you can't reason them out of it or even bribe them, sometimes they need a very physical reminder not to do it.

I haven't had any thumbsuckers, but I would think if you place a motivation in front of her, it is going to heighten her need and awareness of sucking her thumb, and also her sense of failure when she does forget herself and do it. Perhaps it would work during the day, but at night she really does not have an awareness that she is doing it.

Personally, I would make a rule that she can't do it outside of the house, offer gentle reminders when she does, and just let it go.

M.,
My parents had told me they would get me a bike if I would quit (I was 5 at the time). That thumb was out and that bike was mine, maybe the ear piercing might work, good luck!

Give back the animal! My step daughter has sucked her thumb since birth and she is nine!! Not completely all our fault she still does it, but taking the animal takes away another comfort for her and that won't help. When my daughter was about 5 we talked about being a big girl and how big girls don't suck their thumb.I wouldn't let her suck her thumb during the day and i would send her to her room if she did. Then we "practiced" not sucking our thumbs at night. So at first we started with a couple nights a week of "practice" and then it was every other night. Eventually she wanted to "practice" on her own. Then a family member told her to do it all the time and hence the 9 yr old that sucks her thumb. Be consistant and maybe give a sticker for not sucking her thumb and don't let anyone let her suck her thumb! And go in when she is sleeping and pull her thumb out! Good luck~ I was a thumb sucker and my mother made me quit at 6!

Let her stop when she's ready to stop. I sucked my thumb until I was 8 and I have a 7 year old who sucks her thumb (my other 2 have never sucked their thumbs). Over the las year it has gotten less and less and now she only does it when she's sleeping. It's a form of self soothing and it's comforting to those kids who do it. I'm strongly against forcefully taking this away from a child.