I don't have an answer for you but I have the EXACT same story as you. I didn't go to 9 lac. cons. but other than that, I tried EVERYTHING and I mean EVERYTHING with my first son. I completely exhausted myself and put on 10 lbs trying to eat all the right foods and make sure I was getting enough. After 3 months I hated that pump! I finally was so beyond exhaustion and frustration I went to formula. My son was such a happy baby after completely on formula and always having a full tummy and I was less stressed once I accepted it. With my 2nd son I was hoping that I would be able to know more from the get-go and be more successful, which I wasn't. And then I had my 3rd and it happened again. Each time I was less stressed out but I tried breast feeding. For some reason my body just would not produce enough milk for my kids to gain weight, barely enough to maintain their weight w/o supplement. So I feel for you and completely understand your stress and frustration. Just do what is best for you and baby. My kids are completely happy and healthy after using formula for a year. Another bonus is that my husband got to help out for the middle of the night feedings :) Best of luck to you and it sounds like you are a wonderful mother to do SO much to try to give your baby the best!