"That Time of the Month Help"

I know this a late response and you have had lots of good advice---I just want to pass on a good cleaning idea. Hydrogen Peroxide---very good at getting out blood stains in underwear. Underwear is soooo expensive these days!! Don't use soap first---soak entire garment completely in the HP until stain is completely gone then launder. Just something my Mom passed on to me.

The Always brand pads are super thin and I think are pretty comfortable. I use the "ultra thin with wings" ones and even with post delivery bleeding, never leaked through. I did use the longer overnight ones because I'd just given birth and didn't overflow. Costco carries these in bulk! :)When I started menstrating, I had a moderate period every 2 weeks. Maybe just suggest to her that she change her pad between every two classes at school or something to help her remember to change it before she leaks. Here's a link to an Always Infinity free sample: http://www.always.com/infinity/always_infinity.jsp

I can't imagine NOT using tampons so you might ask her why she feels she's not ready for those. "O.B." brand makes them without dispensers, so you're not having to insert plastic, cardboard, etc. Also, O.B. makes really really small ones for lighter days.

For pads, it's Always all the way, even postpartum!

But I would definitely run this by the ob/gyn--such a heavy flow out the outset doesn't sound like the usual thing.

J. - First of all it's so wierd that we hope not to offend anyone with a very honest and NORMAL thing!
Okay - I was one of those girls who had horribly heavy periods and a LOT of cramps when my period started. I also bled through clothes (thankfully not at school) and did a lot of laundry. Your daughter is old enough to help with laundry. Or at least if there is some leakage she could rinse out the panties and soak them.
Talk with your daughter and find out why she is so dead set against tampons. It could be something so very basic (for some reason girls think that using tampons no longer makes you a virgin, who knew?) or it could just be teenage angst. I would probably not talk to her about it now, since she is in the middle of her first period, but maybe a week or two later. I second the person that said she liked the "sport" tampons. Those things are great. When I was young I did the tampons at night, but set my alarm to wake me up at 2 or 3am to change so I wouldn't leak.
Pads are bulky, I HATE them and never wear them, even at night. But, if she is wearing it to go to bed then she doesn't have to worry about walking :)
Another thing is, mine did not slow down or become less painful until I went on the pill (which I did at 18 and it was GREAT!). That is definetly something to think about.
Good Luck, L.

I had very, very heavy periods--including leaking through pads, needing to change pads in less than every 50. Mine never changed. Later I found out that my mother had heavy periods--not as heavy as mine--but heavy.

So I ask you, do you, or did you have heavy periods? That might be a clue to her future periods. Also see if she starts to have cramps.

And if her future periods continue to be heavy take her in to the doc. They have so many things to help young girls now.

Hi J.:

Usually the more expensive brands have fairly thin , but longer models for the night. One tip for the uncomfortable, bulky pads: Buy your daughter those spandex grandma-undies. I know, they're ugly, but I wore them myself before starting on tampons and then again after giving birth to our daughter, when I couldn't use tampons. Wear them over your regular undies, and it will keep the pads in place better and make it more comfortable. I got that tip from my mom, and it really works. Just give it a try.

Call the advice nurse just to cover your bases. This happened to me when I was 12/13ish. It lasted for a fairly long time and I ended up with severe anemia. So, while nothing may be wrong at all, I'd cover your bases.

My first period was EXTREMELY heavy and lasted a long time. I just couldn't stop the blood and soaked through everything. It took my body a few months to figure it out and normalize. Though I was always a heavy flow-er, it did settle into something more normal. So I'd give it time before getting worried.

By the way, I use Instead, an alternative to tampons and a LOVE them. I'd recommend them to anyone, though she wouldn't be ready for them yet if she isn't ready for tampons.

For what it's worth, I would REALLY hesitate to put her on the pill so young as some have suggested. That's a very invasive and serious intervention for someone so young and something so normal and natural. There is some evidence that there may be adverse effects of long term b.c. use, and if she starts this young she's in for a lot of years of daily hormones.

My 13 year old has heavy periods too...fortunately she is willing to use tampons. It has been suggested to me that she be put on birth control such as yaz to help regulate and lighten her flow. Maybe you can discuss this with your daughter too.

Always Ultra! I think they have overnight or super flow ones. They are great and very thin.

I would take her to your ob/gyn for a check up. Heavy periods at that age aren't the norm. Couple that with the self-awareness issues, life can' be easy for her right now. Always has a new pad out that is thin but highly absorbent, holding a considerable amount of flow. Overnight pads are available with this same material. Any pad is going to feel awkward because it's different. Tell her to stick it out and try different brands. You can go online to the various companies and they'll send samples. I wish you all well.

Hi...so I read your question and I can't bring myself to even use a tampon...(only once to go swimming)..anyways I thought I could give a suggestion I use the always overnight pads..they are super thin and super absorbent and keep you feeling dry unlike alot of other pads out there!(you can get a huge box at costco or wal-mart for pretty cheap..here is a link the the website http://www.always.com
They have a big variety but if she is having heavy flow I would stick with the overnight pads...that's all I ever use!

when i 1st started getting my periods ( age 9 1/2) they were really heavy but it ran in my family, it was something hereditary and i was so unluckily blessed with them, i wouldnt suggest birth control for her at her age, i know alot of ppl r on it but i have friends that were put on it when they started theirs ( ages 10-13) and now they have alot of probs such as abnormal periods, problems conceiving babies, and a couple have hormornal probs from them. try some diff pads, i use the always ultra thin overnight ones ( super thin cant even really tell ur wearing them) and i also use always infinity overnight ones, they r super thin and hold alot, i rarely have leakage anymore since using those. i feel for ur daughter, im 26 going on 27 and i still remember all my periods from when i 1st started, i use to have loads of laundry too from them, my mom was there for me alot and it helped, she made sure she found everything she could for me to try, alot of the pad companies will send u free samples if u go to their sites, thats how i tried diff ones, good luck and i hope her body starts to normalize soon

My periods have always been extremely heavy, to the point where it interferes with living my life normally. When I have my heavy days (usually only 1 or 2 per cycle, thank God) I have a hard time leaving the house, because I have to change my super-plus tampon AND maxi pad every 30 minutes or so.

When I was a teen I was diagnosed with mennorhagia (severe bleeding) after I was found to be severely anemic. As soon as I went on the pill, my life changed. My periods were light and predictable. Amazing!

Your daughter's body may very well just be trying to "figure things out" right now, but if this continues for more than a couple more months, please take her to the doctor. There's lots that can be done now. Check out the following article...it spells out the treatment options very nicely:

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/140146/possible_...

Hi, Jenn--

I also had heavy and long-lasting periods throughout my life. In the last few years, I started using some fabric pads-- bought them online and, for the life of me, I can't recall the name of them. However, the ones I bought have an upper layer with micro-fleece and the inside layers are made of hemp. I was shocked at how much the hemp can hold and they are much thinner than maxi-pads. Just a thought. It may not be the answer for your daughter's needs, but it is an option.

You may want to check in with your daughter's physician to make sure that your daughter isn't losing too much iron. My periods got so bad and so long that I was just exhausted all the time. As an adult, I did do a lot of tweaking with my diet and just trying to get more healthy and my periods did get better.

Best of luck to you and your daughter.

Hi Jenn,

I would give her a few months to see if it normalizes. Many times it's the body just trying to figure out the right balance. You may want to consider having her take an iron supplement if it continues to be heavy to prevent anemia.

In regards to pads, have considered trying cloth menstrual pads? Fresh Moon pads are super absorbant and made out of hemp and bamboo. They are super nice and comfortable. Because it is cloth, she will feel like she is wearing her underwear and not feel sticky or bulky.

Some women have serious reactions to the chemicals in pads and the body will bleed heavier to flush out toxins or the pH balance can get thrown off and create yeast, bacterial or odor issues due to the disposable pads.

I would never recommend tampons to any woman. Disposable products are not always sanitary, plus by pushing all those chemicals into the body where you are bleeding, you are allowing a direct access for them to enter her blood stream.

The other issue is that the rayon and other fabrics can create tiny ulcerations along the vaginal wall as well as the plastic applicators. Cell peeling and tiny ulcers have also been associated with tampon use.

Alternatives would be the Diva Cup or the Keeper/Moon Cups. I love the seasponge tampons as they are super easy and comfortable, but they need to be changed very frequently during heavy flow and I find that public bathrooms at schools rarely have a toilet and sink near each other where she can discretely clean it.

The best option though, would be for her to try the All In One's (AIO's) in the 11" size they hold a lot and if she needs more protection there is also a 13" which is a great option for nighttime.

To wash them, simply rinse them in cold water in the sink right after using them. If there is a little staining, spray some Bac Out and/or sprinkle a little oxygen bleach on them and then throw them in the laundry hamper. They can be washed and dried like normal.

www.fresh-moon.com

Sincerely,
A.

Gladrags at http://www.gladrags.com have been good to me, I use the Diva Cup with a pad to make sure of no leakage. They are made here locally in Portland. You can buy 100% organic cotton or just regular cotton if you want & because it is cloth, she will feel like she is wearing her underwear and not feel sticky or bulky. The diva cup doesn't dry you out like tampons. She might try the Sea sponges, they seem like a better fit for a 13 year old. With the glad rags you can choose how much protection & what size for yourself.

Some women have serious reactions to the chemicals in pads and the body will bleed heavier to flush out toxins or the pH balance can get thrown off and create yeast, bacterial or odor issues due to the disposable pads.

I suggest having her take iron when she is on her period to prevent anemmia & maybe look at putting her on the pill to regulate her period if this doesn't stop in 6 months or less.

If you do put her on the pill make sure it is one level hormone not three different levels like Othro Tri-Cyclen, that is the most commonly prescribed. There are hundreds if not thousands of different kinds of pills out there so it might take a bit of time & trial & error to get the right fit if this is a way you need to go.

I got my period in 6th grade right before my 12th birthday. I had heavy periods & lots of cramps until I got on Ortho-cyclen. I stayed on them util I wanted to get pregnant with my daughter. It took a year to get gregnant. I now, after having my daughter don't have to take pills anymore, I am 34 & have been off the pill for 9 years.

Hope this helps.

How about trying the ultrathin ones? I use to love those until I started using the diva cup. I have heavy flow to start then it tappers off. But the Always ultrathin overnights are great and not bulky... i think they even sell junior versions now too.. you might check that out... just a thought :) BEcky

My daughter who is now 21 had very irregular and heavy periods in her teens. She finally went on a low dose birth control pill to regulate her periods at age 16. She uses tampons and mini pads for heavier days. Your daughter may not be ready for these, but it's something to consider if she continues to have heavy bleeding.

J.,
I feel for your daughter. I was 11 when I started and to top it off I was with my dad and the flow was soooo heavy I had no idea what to do. My first couple of months were extremely irregular painful heavy and each one lasted about 2 weeks. I to was terrified at the thought of tampons at the time and resorted to using a lot of pads. Always is the way to go. The store brands don't compare so don't waste your money. Always heavy flow with wings and just change them as often as needed. I would also look into getting her some of the fresh wipes. When you are that heavy with pads you don't feel very clean and that will help her feel more confident and secure. I would also talk to her pediatrician and make sure that they don't have any concerns. They may even want to put her on a low dose birth control to help with the heavy flow. If they want to do that, or you ask them about that, I would ask about
NOR QD it is a progestren only birth control it is safer for growing bodies, its the only oral cont. you can take while nursing. There are very little side affects. The only one I have ever had has been random periods at the beginning. But now my periods are short painless and light all but one or two days. Also unless you are nursing the Nor QD doesn't offer the pregnancy protection so if you are against providing that at any age... not that you have anything to worry about most girls especially ones that come from good family homes, like yours have no intrest in sex....you know that you are truly just helping her to regulate the bleeding not giving her pregnancy protection. I hope that this helped. Keep up the great work. I am dreading this part of parenthood and I know it will be here before I know it. Good luck.
C.

It was not that long ago that i started mine...i was a late starter and i had the same problem. I know it is hard to think about putting your "baby" on Birth control but Yaz worked great with me and other then that i love the tampax sport tampons i was much like your daughter and i hated tampons, but i tried that one and it is the most comfortable thing ever. But really just be supportive, it is a hard time for a young girl and feeling awkward is not easy.

Always Infinity. I wear the overnights the whole week.

I would talk to her obgyn. If the heavy periods continue, the pill could help little them up and take away any cramping.

I totally understand what your daughter is going through. I had somewhat of the same problem when I got my first period.

I am going to agree with almost all of the responses. First I agree with the Always brand of pads. They are the only ones that I can wear and I only wear them at night. They are perfect. They are thin and not bulky at all. They have all different sizes.

I also want to agree with the responses that suggest birth control. I had to beg my mom when I was about 15 to get put on birth control. I was having such heavy periods that I was going through a super plus tampon and a pad with in about an hour and a half.
When I started on the birth control my periods almost immediately started getting lighter.
It may be hard for your daughter at such a young age to understand that but if she's not willing to try tampons I think that trying to get her on some kind of BC will help her out greatly.

I really hope all of this helps you. Good luck to you and your daughter.

S.

Feel for both of you.

I was 9 when I started, and used pads for the first two. Since then tampons all the way. (I'm a one tampon an hour girl for at least the first day...and always have been. So they were NOT small.) The great thing about hymens though, is that they pull back to let the menstrual flow flooowwwww. So it's really not that big of a deal.

2 tips: Don't Depress the Plunger until you nearly lose your grip & Vaseline.

1) You don't plunge as you're inserting. You know that. I know that. The pictures on the box are obvious if you know that. But just starting out, I didn't know that. I thought you inserted the little tip maybe an inch and then pushed the plunger. That hurts. It was a couple of months before I found out how you're REALLY supposed to do it. Works a lot better if you do it that way!!! It's amazing to me that many of the girls I've met (college age and older!) who complain about tampons are actually doing it the wrong way. Well, not amazing that they're complaining. amazing that no one has set them straight. I guess we're just so conditioned to accept pain...we put up with a lot.

2) A dab of vaseline on the tip (or KY, what have you, but I used vaseline as a kid). It doesn't affect absorbtion that much, and it makes it waaay easier to insert. This works for cardboard exposed tips AND on the plastic ones.

Hi Jenn,
My daughter started on the 4th day of Jr High. She also has heavy flow and since has only been irregular one month so we can predict it pretty well. I wasn't allowed to use tampons , but bought them anyway because I couldn't stand the pads way back in the 70's.
For my daughter I did buy the slender tampons and just leave them upstairs. She sometimes has used them but most of the time she used maxi pads without the wings. They are hard to find try target though. I do have a friend whos daughter has had to go on the pill to help with heavy flow.If it is really heavy you might want to ask about that though if you are like me that sounds like an awful idea.We have lots of overflow laundry too and zout helps.
D.

J.,

I know it would be uncomfortable at first, but if her monthly stays heavy (it does for some), you may want to try he Always brand for size 14-plus. I am a larger woman, and they help provide more coverage area without the bulk. She would be covered end-to-end probably, but it may be worth a try.

If her monthly stays heavy and uncomfortable, you may have to have a serious conversation with her and the doctor about ways of controlling it...unfortunately that would most likely be the "pill"...and that adds another area of discretion and privacy to your converstaions that she may not be ready for...your call.

Good luck and God bless,
T.

Hey Jenn,I know this is a late reply.But i have to let you know about this period panty called adira.Its a perfect product, if you or your daughter have staining issues during periods.Its cotton and comfy,and rash-free.Give it a shot.