Thank You Card Etiquette

Scenario #1-Well, you probably should send a card to everyone as everyone individually donated money. But it is probably acceptable to just send a quick thank you instead of a three page letter about all of your activities. Thank you would probably be enough. You could even drop them off at the office with a visit from the baby! saves stamps anyway
#2-Again, thank you is acceptable and in English is fine (my husband's family speak only Spanish) Or if you want to be adventuresome learn how to say that in Arabic and just write that on a piece of paper or put in cards. If you want to save money and have a printer do it on your computer or go to the dollar store. They usually have packs of eight for a dollar.
Have fun and enjoy your baby!

1. I think individual cards are a must. I know it will take a long time but I personally feel that is necessary.

We just threw a wedding shower for someone at work and she gave a group thank you. The difference was that I bought my own gift. I was a bit offended. (I know in the grand scheme of things it should not matter but I took the time to go to the store and you can't take the time to write a card) . Again a group gift is different but I think some people may feel the same way as I do. I think it is even more important since you left the job and would like to have a great last impression in case in the future you need to make any connections should your situation change. PS. Sorry for the vent.

2. I love the previous posters suggestion about writing in English with adding a line of Arabic.

Congrats on your new miracle!

One nice card to be posted is a very good idea or if you have there e-mail addresses send individual e-cards.

I also think sending the card in English (if your husband can not make the time) is a good idea. You can even write in the card how you husband is so busy and felt I needed to thank you before time has slipped away.

S.

Congrats on your new baby! About the office thank you card..just send one card to HR, but mention everyone's name in the card. That way it seems more personal. About your husband's family - there are free online translators, where you type in English what you want to say - click TRANSLATE, and it comes up for you to copy. I have had trouble with the English to Polish though, so you may want to ask your husband to check it before you write out the notes.

#1 - I think it is completely appropriate to send a group thank you card with baby pics.
#2 - I have the same issue but with Polish. I write the cards in English to get them out, but maybe if your husband can teach you how to write "thank you" in Arabic, then you can do the card in English with the thank you in Arabic. Although it's not perfect, I find it's the thought that counts. I have also received cards written only in Japanese and only in Polish where I can't read Polish and I have a 3 yr old command of the Japanese. From my perspective, it is the thought and sentiment behind both the gift and the cards and the actual words are not as important.

Just a thought...do you have a cute picture from the baptism...you could make a thank you card at Walmart or where ever..have your husband write the Arabic words out for you and make one on-line...I wrote all my cards from my kid. This way people get a picture of the baby and a thank you card.

Many would say you need to do individual cards, but my attitude it that for a group gift, a group card is appropriate. They gave one card, so you give one card. I did this with my place of employment, and I think my hubby did the same at his work.

#1 I think if the gift card was sent as a 'group' gift, sending just one note to everyone who contributed is a perfectly reasonable thing to do. Just address it to " The HR Department' or your direct manager and ask them to share it with the rest of the team.

#2 Sorry, but your hubby is TOTALLY dropping the ball here. It took two of you to make the baby and although he is 'busy' - he is not breastfeeding, etc. Just because you are now a SAHM, does not mean you magically have time to do everything, much less learn Arabic! And, unfortunately, even though your new in-laws probably know that you do not know the language and their son does, if the thank you notes are late, it will probably somehow be YOUR fault, just because that's often how in-laws and relations work!!

Insist to your husband that he schedule time on a weekend to do these notes. It is totally his responsibility as much as yours! If he doesn't want to do it on a weekend, set him up at the dining table just before and after dinner with the cards and a list and have him do two or three a night.

Another alternative - if you have a good relationship with your MIL or a sister or aunt in your husband's family, ask THEM for help! Don't criticize your husband to them, but just explain that you would really like the notes to be in the correct language. Most people are happy to help out when there is a baby in the house, especially new grandmas and aunties. Visiting the baby and sharing some tea and snacks with you while you work on these notes might be a great way to build your relationship with the women in the family. They can tell you a little bit about each person who is getting a note, etc.

You should not have to enable your husband about this at all, but at least that way, they'll get done!

Remind him that these are HIS relatives and loved ones too and make sure he knows that you just want his family to be pleased about the birth of your son and you want your new 'little family' to make the right, polite impression to people!! Good luck!

It's never okay for someone, even a busy husband not to acknowledge a gift. And, really it should be in a language they understand. Think about it this way. THEY took the time out of their busy schedules to send you a gift. But, for your husband to not write the notes, it is conveying that his time is much more important than theirs and that he can't be bothered to acknowledge the gift with a couple minutes of his time with a thank you. They will probably see it as a major insult. Tell him to do the right thing.

I would send the group thank you to work, with the pix. As far as the non-english reading/speaking relatives...I would give the husband one more chance, then just do the english thing! better sent than not.

I would not write 30 individual cards, what you suggested was perfect with pictures of the baby, etc.
Can you put the cards in front of your husband and ask him to take 1/2 hour to do the cards? If he's just not going to do them then tell him you will and see what he says?

you need to send individual cards to work - they contributed individually - and that is what you should do if you want to follow etiquette.

as for the baptism - write them in english - no one expects you to be able to write in arabic. good luck.

#1. Group thank you would be fine.

#2. Your husband needs to step up and write the cards. There really is no excuse for him. If he simply cannot bring himself to thank his family properly for their generosity, perhaps ask him to write down something for you so that you can write the cards, using his passage as your guide.

1) a department thank-you card with a pic is perfectly appropriate. You can also do a plate of cookies or something if you don't have a pic, yet.

2) Write in English. Getting the cards out is more important than not at all, and, like you mentioned, someone will be able translate for the Arabic-speaking family. Another thought is to have "thank-you" written in Arabic at the end. It will be a thoughtful addition, and something that you can learn quickly.

Good luck, and congrats on the new family member!

Regarding your two scenarios -

1) I think it is appropriate to send one "universal" thank you to your department. Pictures are always nice. Handwritten is necessary.

2) Write the thank-you, in English, however, on your last line, write something in Arabic (put your husband to work in jotting something down for you - even something about "how important the family is to you... " is a nice gesture, and keep it in YOUR handwriting (it will show you took the effort!) Don't have your husband "translate" the thank you. That's not necessary. Every year, a family member would write their "last line" in Czech" for my mother-in-law, and she always got a kick out of it. It was always just a "cute" line that made her laugh - then she had to translate for us!

Sure, it would be nice for your husband to write them. Realistically, it rarely happens in my household either. Congratulations on your boys! Very fun!

In regards to #1 yes you can send a group thank you with pics etc.As for the second , I would write it in English and then when hubby has a few seconds ask him to write a quick few words in Arabic. If you ask him to do lets say three then usually you get on a roll and do more. You are doing a great job with this and making it personal from you will mean alot :)

Hi,
here are my two cents:

1. hand write a group card and bring it to work with a bowl of candy, muffins, a cake or whatever, that way you will reach more people than just with a card that being hung somewhere.

2. A card in English is better than nothing. They know you do not speak/write Arabic. They will find somebody to translate.

Good luck

1. In my mind, since it was a group gift a group thank you card is appropriate - especially since it was 30 different people! Sending a picture is always a nice touch.

2. Yes, write it in english and grab your husband to jot a note in the finished cards before you send them. His family will know that the card is a thank you, and that is what's really important. They can talk to other family members to decipher the actual text.

For item #1, I think the group card is fine. For #2 - write it in english and have hubby write a line in each basically translating - all he will be doing is writing one line. Other option is to be more insistent with him that the thank yous need to go out. If you address the envelope and do all the other part, sit him down for 10 mins to finish.

Hi mom the thank you card to the HR is great I have done that myself, for the ones that do not speak english have your husband pitch in it will only take 5 min. Also this sound like a good stay at home mom pt job teaching them to speak einglish. Good Luck

It would be perfect to do just 1 thank you gift to your former employees. I would also think it would be appropriate for you to write a thank you note as well, but I'd really try to encourage your husband to participate. By not doing so, you will be setting up yourself to do all thank you cards going forward. It may not seem like a lot, but I have 2 kids and it's a lot. Any help I can get from my husband is great. We now split the thank yous up. He does his famil and friends and I do mine, and any neighborhood thank yous.

Hi K.,

I think it's usually considered "proper" to write individual thank you notes for a group gift. However, most group gifts come from smaller groups, and with a newborn (and a 2.5-yr.-old) I think writing one note to have them post at work would be just fine.

With #2, I think it would be preferable for the thank-yous to be in a language everyone understands, but if there's someone there who can translate (and your really can't get your husband to write the notes), I don't think it's a problem to write them in English.

In today's world, many people are not good about writing thank you notes at all. The fact that you're sending them (and being so thoughtful during the process) counts for a lot.

Best,
R.