Television Opinions

My son is four and we watch tv a total of maybe a couple of hours a week. Today, we YouTubed a Mister Rogers and watched it together. Other than that, he's been too busy for tv this week. He's got a lot of other interesting things to do.

As for my husband, unless it's an occasional daytime sports game, we both keep our viewing time limited to after Kiddo's in bed. That's about 1-2 hours, average, on an evening. We don't always watch tv either.

I'll share from my experience as a preschool teacher: kids who watch a lot of tv/movies may have more limited scope in pretend play because they want to 'play' what they watched and those characters and stories are very proscribed, so the imagination gets squished because they are often rehasing the tv instead of creating independently. They learn some very interesting/negative behaviors from some of the characters. Young girls try to emulate princesses and it is a bit sexually precocious, in my opinion. They are getting the message earlier that being 'special' is about being pretty, not about being unique or talented, and some age-inappropriate posturing can happen. Likewise, boys are often given limited roles as well; rarely do we see well-rounded male roles. A lot of more violent play comes out of emulating characters who do nothing but fight, even if they are the good guys. Some children, after a weekend of tv, have a bit of a hard time coming back into the classroom and just getting started with play-- they look around and tell me 'I don't know what to do'; they've been constantly entertained for a while by tv and now have to switch gears. They are also exposed to situations that may be too complicated for them to understand, as well as the idea of being made 'whole' by another, which many movies aimed at young girls are based on. The goal is rarely being strong and true in one's self,but in either getting the prince or kicking butt (for boys). Crappy, crappy messages about life.

I think the other problem with tv is that this distraction robs children and parents of the time spent together. The child is not the parent's focus, nor is the parent the child's. TV is a distraction. Much of it is trying to be hip and edgy these days, with quick-cuts and animation that looks just as real as live action. Some of these things are incongruous with how a little person's brain works. Children need more time to focus on a concept than television often gives them. If you compare the relatively more child-respecting pace of Sesame Street "Old School" to the more frantic pace of some shows today, you'll see a pronounced difference. The long shots and slow pacing of Mr Rogers is one of the reasons it is my "go to" show. (It's also substance in an age when much kids programming is like junk food.) Children do not understand sarcasm or some of the more precocious storylines that are aimed at them. I don't believe that many people who make television for children understand early childhood development or actually LIKE kids. Many shows are merely a platform for the merchandise. And adult television can be just confusing.

I understand your position. I watched tv with my mom at home as a kid and didn't develop any serious issues from it. However, it's a whole different world: the technologies of media have changed, the way in which advertising/marketing to children has profoundly changed for the worse, and the topics some shows broach have radically changed from when I was a kid. I also feel like my husband and I know better how to give our son the best chances to succeed in life, and open-ended playtime is a big priority for us.

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We watch to much TV when my spouse is around. That being said I have noticed a huge difference in their attitudes when they have been watching TV and when they haven't. Currently my son is grounded from electronics which includes the TV. He is less hostile, antsy and tonight he voluntarily did an extra credit project. Yes, I think the TV has a serious negative impact.

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My husband watches way too much TV, but not when my kids are around. We both think the kids should be doing other things. TV isn't awful. It has its place, and can be fun for the whole family. We especially like watching TV with our 13 year old. It opens the door to tons of conversations.

However, I think that too much TV squashes the imagination. Many kids complain of being bored because they don't know how to play anymore without electronics. I see that as a problem. One of my favorite things to do is listen to my boys while I'm cooking or cleaning as they create games to play together (they're 7 and 13). That wouldn't happen if the TV was on all the time. I also want them to be active. They need to be playing outside, and they do. I want them to enjoy exploring and they need to get exercise. TV encourages lethargy. In addition, I want them to READ. I'm an English teacher, and reading is very important to me. So often we will all sit around the room, all curled up with our various books. That is so much better than zoning out in front of the TV. TV, along with most things, is fine in moderation, but there are so many other things that a family can do together or individually that are beneficial.

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There is no evidence of a causal relationship between ADHD and television viewing. HOWEVER, there is good evidence that television viewing contributes to obesity, poorer school performance, increased behavioral issues at school, a greater perception among children that the world is a dangerous and scary place, desensitization to violence and (in some children) an increased propensity to violence. Additionally the time DH is spending in front of the tv is time he is not spending reading to the kids or outside playing with them and getting them moving.

Perhaps he can record his programs and watch them after the kids are in bed?

We are not big tv watchers. We did not have a tv until DS was about 3-1/2. Now (he is 5) he sees about 30 minutes a week of either Discovery nature videos or Jean Michel Cousteau ocean videos. He does not watch by himself.

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I think maybe it depends on the kid and what kind of programs he/she is watching. Also, is the child sitting in front of the screen like a zombie, or is he/she talking about the show- what they think might happen next, how might a problem be solved. Even if it's sports they're watching, and the kids are bonding with dad, I think there's something good in it.

When I was a kid I spent a few hours watching Saturday morning cartoons- it was when all the best cartoons were on (couldn't miss the Smurfs- lol).
I also used to watch tv @ 8pm with my brother and my parents most nights and watch shows like Emergency!, CHiPs, Dukes of Hazard, Little House on the Prarie, the Cosby Show, etc (I'm not dating myself here, am I?)
Anyway, despite it all, I somehow still managed to get into college and get A's and B's ;)
Do I think TV can be bad? Absolutely! But I think so long as they aren't watching too much and aren't watching things that aren't age-appropriate, and are still getting outside to play and use their imaginations, IMHO, it's fine.

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I think TV is a terrible habit. I personally love to watch it, it's how I relax in the evening but I don't want my daughter to have that habit. My neice and nephew who watch a lot of tv are always complaining about "being bored" even when there are tons of kids around if there isn't a tv show or video game to do. That is a problem! TV also trains your attention span. The constant switching, excitement, etc. It's just not good to be inundated by it. Then of course you are bored when you just have real life. Real life is really slow compared with that.

When I was a kid we watched tv, a show after school and maybe one in the evening. But we went out to play, we played school or did puzzles or played games or whatever without tv. If your kids aren't doing that, then it's a problem I think. They are just missing out on so much. Their little sponge brains are soaking up marketing and who knows what messages when they could be out exploring the world and learning and moving their bodies.

And if they are watching the type of shows that your husband is interested in, that could be another problem altogether.

So I don't think it's as simple as they will get ADHD from tv, who knows if they will. Since it's not an issue here I've never really looked into that aspect. But the connections their brains are making will be different and really they will be missing out on a lot. If they are watching tv, it is time they are not doing something. TV is totally passive, no input from them, just sitting there taking it in. There are plenty of studies, I believe that correlate length of time in front of screen with overweight. The worst thing that could happen I think would be they would be overweight, unhealthy, boring individuals who don't know how to amuse themselves, can only imitate in play what they see on the screen and are mega consumers because of all the marketing that is being thrust upon them.

So as to how much we watch in front of the kids? Very little. She can watch 1 show per day (usually a 30 minute show with no commercials or a video). We do not have it on in front of her at all.

I think everyone has to find the moderation they are comfortable with but I don't plopping the kids in front of the tv or having it on constantly as background noise is benign. Put on music, or NPR if they are old enough or a book on tape or something if you need background noise.

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I think it depends more on what they are watching. If I could go back and do it again I would not let my son watch anything violent. No fighting in cartoons, no superheros fighting to save the world, or anything of the sort. I think anything more violent than Tom & Jerry or the coyote and roadrunner is too violent.

I think sports and outdoor shows are fine. Educational shows are okay too, but sometimes you have to be careful about what exactly are they teaching your kids. There are often underlying messages in kids shows and you have to be sure the television isn't teaching your child something you disagree with.

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It's not going to give them ADHD, nor is it going to make them go blind (like they told people in the 60s). But it is going to get them used to sedentary activities, help them develop the habit your husband has (sitting and being entertained), and give them the expectation that it's up to someone else (or someTHING else) to keep them occupied. There is no conversation going on, no interaction, no creativity, no physical activity. It does not develop gross motor skills or fine motor skills. Then they like to graduate to video games, which gives them fine motor skills with their thumbs, and not much else. It also exposes them to a ridiculous number of commercials which can give kids a serious case of the "gimmes" - Gimme this, gimme that. That's why pediatricians don't like it.

It would be far better to find a family program or movie you can all enjoy together and talk about afterwards. Nature shows (if not too graphic), history shows (depending on the age of the kids), movie classics are all good choices.

And I think if your husband saw what he was doing as "parenting" instead of "babysitting", he might make other choices.

Limiting the amount of TV also makes kids learn to make good choices - they evaluate programs to choose the best ones for themselves (within parental limits, of course). Life is about making choices so it's a vital skill to learn.

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1) What does your Husband watch when the kids are around?
2) Are the kids also, just sitting there vegetating watching tv with Daddy? Thus, having to watch what he watches, even if it is not kid appropriate???????????
3) Even if your Husband is watching TV, the kids CAN play/go outside/do other things in the room. Of course, Husband watching TV... is he SUPERVISING the kids????

4) How old are your kids???
5) Too much television is not ideal.... but what is more NOT ideal.. is if your kids are watching the shows your Husband is watching... because that may not be kid appropriate at all.

6) Can't your Husband play with the kids? Do "Daddy" things with them??? Any kid needs that. Interaction with their Dad. Since he IS home.

7) Sure, tv is a way to unwind for many people. But, if the person is in a stupor about it while watching... then well, that is not really unwinding. That to me is- Boredom. Or the person just not wanting to do anything else. Thus, tv is an excuse.

I watched tv as a kid too, like you said.
But not hours of it and we also played and with our parent and went outside. We were not cooped up all day, watching tv. Only tv.
So, that is the difference.

My kids watch tv. Kid appropriate stuff.
But not hours of it.
Nor all day.
They are allowed to watch it. Then we turn it off. And just tell them, its time for other stuff. They don't argue about it.
And, kids also need to be.... prompted to do other things. Guided. If you just leave them alone, with no guidance, then well, they will just sit there watching TV... JUST like Daddy. And that's all.

Just turn off the tv.
Since you don't want them to do only that, and only that with Daddy.
And not for hours.
The tv is babysitting them. Not Daddy.

When my Hubby is home with the kids, he plays with them. They also watch some tv, but it is not the majority of it. Or, while he is working/studying at home... the kids are in the same room as he, and they have activities they do, 'with' Daddy but being in the same room. Or they go outside. Our yard is fenced in, and safe.
My Husband only watches tv, per the shows he wants to watch. Not just sitting there watching every single show one after another all day. Once his show is over, he turns it off and does other stuff.

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We watch tv all the time and we are all ok!

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we have the tv on all day, I can't stand it being quiet. However, we rarely are just sitting down watching it. I let her watch about 15 minutes while I make my lunch in the mornings before work, and she watches a half an hour or so while I make dinner, however. Other than that, it's usually mythbusters or how it's made on the science channel, (or the awesome days they show the states or the presidents on the history channel) so she barely pays attention.

If they just sit in front of the tv, that's bad. If they're up running around and playing while it's on, not so bad. In my opinion, of course.

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All the experts advise 0 hours of TV for children under two years old. None.
Yes I think too much tv for children who are 3 and up DOES influence their behavior. I'd say mine watch more than an hour sometimes but less on some days, so an average of 1 hour. Mine didnt watch anything but educational stuff (Mickey Mouse Club, Blues Clues, WordWorld, Dirtgirlworld, Superwhy etc). NO fighting superheros, no Batman, Power Rangers Bionacles etc etc. Now my husband likes to watch fishing shows and outdoors shows with my six year old.

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I disagree with parents that say it depends what they are watching. The point of limited TV is to get them doing other things and using their imagination. Not sure if they will get ADD from watching too much, but they will come to rely on TV to entertain them and eventually will get too lazy to entertain themselves when it is not on. My kids on most days watch 1 hour a day, but then there are days they will watch three.

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If it were up to me the TV would be gone completely, but my husband and kids love to watch it. I let the kids watch about a total of 2 hours of TV a day. One hour in the AM before I'm awake they watch G rated cartoons and then again during wind down time before we get ready for bed they might watch it for 30 mins to an hour. I try really hard to keep it off during the day because to me it's just extra noise that I don't need to compete with!

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I personally think it can make them lose their attn span. My kids watch too much tv and I can see some of this happening. I also see my 8 yr old's attitude changing. he is using some phrases, etc that he sees on tv. My kids are very well behaved so I don't like to cut them off too much but hindsight, truly 1-2 hours a day is plenty. I also think they learn to be lazy. I try to let them watch so much then make them 'play' with the tv off or go outside. I don't think we watched as much tv when we were kids. There wasn't as much on, we played outside more, etc Good luck

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Personally, I HATE the television. I don't mind watching DVDs or movies on HBO, but I rarely ever watch network TV because of all the commericals. I really think commercials are bad for people, especially children, because you subconsciously start to think that you need the latest cool product (and children are taught that they need to have that cool toy in order to be happy). So we have it off as much as possible.

But we do watch family movies together, and I let them watch cartoons (on DVD from the library). I don't think there is anything wrong with watching TV in moderation. If I were you, though, I would definitely have a talk with my husband about spending more time with the kids that doesn't involve the television. My parents (especially my mother) both have always had major addictions to television (probably one of the reasons I hate it so much), and when it becomes the only thing your family does together, then it's not good. Families need to balance watching TV with other activities, like going outside and playing. I understand that your husband is tired from work, but his children still need him. My husband's memories of his father are mostly of him being at work all day, then ignoring the kids when he was at home by escaping into the television. Your husband needs to make sure he's spending lots of quality time with his kids, and maybe wait until they are in bed before he starts watching TV (or at least have it off for a few hours so he can focus on the children). Just my opinion. :-)

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My husband isn't much of a TV guy... for one, he isn't into watching sports, and he doesn't get mindlessly hooked on regular shows, either- hes a very hands on guy who talks just as much as I do and has different priorities than the TV-THANK GOODNESS:)... also, we decided to not have TV service. (we just have netflix on one TV, and our four kids will go DAYS AND DAYS without watching anything).

There are factors involved here... but even though we don't have TV service I also don't think that TV time is a big deal. I take it as a problem with being sedentary. I watched a lot of TV growing up, but I also spent a heck of a lot of time outside. If they still are as active as you think they would be without TV, then the TV isn't the problem...

...well, then there's the programs and commercials you may allow them to watch (one of the reasons we don't have TV- too much trash) that could be harmful in a different way, but that is another subject

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I didn't set a specific time limit on it, I just made sure that she got a balance of tv and other activities.

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My kids watch a lot of TV - definitely more than they recommend! - but they are also healthy, active, and smart. We do have the TV on a lot when they're home, but they do a lot of other things too. Also, we ONLY watch the kid channels with them, or occasionally a DVD. The only exception is that once in awhile, my husband has sports on (and then the kids aren't really paying attention at all). My dad used to watch the news for hours when he'd come over to visit, & that really bothered me. I really think young kids should not have a lot of exposure to "adult" programming... even the news.

I second Dana's post. And I would worry that they are just sitting around all weekend not being active or using their imaginations. I have a 2 1/2 year old and she watches a movie maybe once a month if that.

I think if you are a family that has the tv on all the time it's a good thing to have something like legos, or a puzzle, or coloring books handy so the kids are distracted by doing something with their hands. That way they arent completely zoned into the tv.

My daughter watches TV when she wakes up and gets ready for school, when she gets home and eats her snack, and sometimes during dinner.

When there is no school, she'll watch a lot more.

My daughter does not have any learning disabilities or mental illnesses. She's artistic, imaginative, curious, head of her private school class (and is the youngest!), has the normal spates of talking back-asserting independence-not listening, and very sweet and outgoing. She's petite in build but has noticeable muscle tone, loves to read the books she can (like Suess and #1 reading books), loves riding her bike, etc...

I think it is what you allow your child to watch coupled with how much time you spend with them per day that is when issues occur with too much tv and video games.

Sometimes we just need the TV to keep our sanity, and I think it's okay as long as it's not excessive. My husband also tends to put the TV on more than I would like, but he's also been working all day and needs his decompression time too. I tend to put it on when I am cooking or washing the dishes. My 4 year old son knows he can watch one show when he gets up, and basically one show either before or after a meal. He knows that when the show is over he needs to turn off the TV. We are careful about WHAT is on the TV. Usually it is Nick Jr, Sprout, PBS, etc. I think that is VERY important!

My daughter watches a lot of tv when she is home. Most of it is educational, but I do limit the "junk" to close to only an hour. I think it should be the parent's prerogative. If you can't see it having a negative impact on your kids, then let them enjoy their childhood

My twins watch a bunch of TV and you wouldn't be able to tell it, they are smart, skinny as can be, athletic, love to go outside and run around and ride bikes. My son watches TV as well and yes he has ADHD, BUT and a big BUT I have adult ADD and his biological father has ADHD so he was doomed to get it (we are not together anymore and he isn't my twins' dad). ADHD isn't caused by kids watching too much TV, or eating too much sugar.