T.L. asks from Wayne, MI on August 04, 2011
Teen Hygiene--is This Normal?
I hope this is just a phase. Is it normal for teens to go days without showering? Is it normal for teens to wear the same clothes for days without washing those clothes? My daughter was over for a visit and I noticed this behavior. She's a very social kid with a boyfriend, so I'm confused by this. She doesn't appear depressed or using drugs. I hope this isn't a bad habit that she's developed. I confronted her about it and it didn't go over well. I offered to wash clothes and even gave her some great smelling shower gel to no avail. Am I just being anal here? This behavior is really bugging me! Help!
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L.A. answers from Austin on August 04, 2011
It can fall into the normal range.. Showering every day is a hassle if she does not want to wash her hair each day.. If she is not very active she may not feel she needs to shower..
It is also not unusual for teens to have favorite clothing that they like to wear so they wear their favorite jeans for many day before being willing to have them washed..
Here is a map of her room or closet..
1. Pile of clothes that have been washed, but not her favorite clothing.. Folded but now covered with books, towels, etc..
2. Pile of clothes she likes ok and has worn 2 or 3 times.. She looks at it holds it up, but does not really want to wear them..
3.Pile of clothing still slightly passable but have worn 4 to 5 day and would make an adult cringe..Easy to wear, looks like what everybody else is wearing.. all broken in..
4. Filthy clothes, probably under the bed (or corner of her closet), that used to be her favorite, but now are too filthy and she does not want to deal with them.. Thus the strange odors in her bedroom or closet..
I am assuming her boyfriend or a female friend will say something if they thinks she has an odor..
If you had a nice talk with her, let it be.. She is old enough to be in charge of her hygiene..
If you are concerned, just keep an eye out for her behaviors, eating well, getting some sleep, can get mildly excited about upcoming events.
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K.I. answers from Oklahoma City on August 04, 2011
Totally normal, ( unless she stinks) also I use to have clothes that I love to wear for days and hated when I have to wash them.
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L.A. answers from Austin on August 04, 2011
It can fall into the normal range.. Showering every day is a hassle if she does not want to wash her hair each day.. If she is not very active she may not feel she needs to shower..
It is also not unusual for teens to have favorite clothing that they like to wear so they wear their favorite jeans for many day before being willing to have them washed..
Here is a map of her room or closet..
1. Pile of clothes that have been washed, but not her favorite clothing.. Folded but now covered with books, towels, etc..
2. Pile of clothes she likes ok and has worn 2 or 3 times.. She looks at it holds it up, but does not really want to wear them..
3.Pile of clothing still slightly passable but have worn 4 to 5 day and would make an adult cringe..Easy to wear, looks like what everybody else is wearing.. all broken in..
4. Filthy clothes, probably under the bed (or corner of her closet), that used to be her favorite, but now are too filthy and she does not want to deal with them.. Thus the strange odors in her bedroom or closet..
I am assuming her boyfriend or a female friend will say something if they thinks she has an odor..
If you had a nice talk with her, let it be.. She is old enough to be in charge of her hygiene..
If you are concerned, just keep an eye out for her behaviors, eating well, getting some sleep, can get mildly excited about upcoming events.
3 moms found this helpful
G.T. answers from Redding on August 04, 2011
Let her be. If she gets stinky one of her peers will let her know. They listen more to their friends than they do their parents at that age. Figure youre saving on laundry and bath soap for now. I'm sure it will come to a screaching halt one day. I remember showering two or three times a day when I was a teen, mostly because I had to re-do my hair, haha. Fun times.
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L.B. answers from Biloxi on August 04, 2011
Had you said your son I would have agreed with you. I have 15 year old boy and he can go a couple days without bathing or changing - but, normally only on days when he knows he is not going anywhere. Like this week - his last three days off before school started and me at work all day - he was a stinky sloth. I make him brush teeth daily tho' - eeewwww.
So it is not unusual - but I tend to remember teen girls being cleaner than boys. However, I don't shampoo my hair every day - depending on what I do, I can skip a day. I also, on weekends, tend to get up Saturday morning, run errands and such and sometimes not shower until Sunday before church (which takes me from Friday am to Sunday am). I wear some clothing twice before I wash it - especially jeans!
So I don't think your daughter is odd. Let her be, but is she smells - make her bathe....that's my rule with my son. LOL
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B.P. answers from New York on August 04, 2011
Who says you have to shower every day and can't wear the same clothes more than once? I don't bathe everyday and I wash my clothes after wearing them SEVERAL times. Does she smell? Does she wear deodorant? Is she offending others besides you? I would leave her alone. I used to hate it when my mom was on me for stupid things like that.
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S.W. answers from Minneapolis on August 04, 2011
I don't think this refusal for hygiene is too uncommon, but I also don't think that it should be viewed as normal. I think I would be concerned about what is going on in your daughter's life that these habits have changed. In my experience, it is partly a rebellion and partly a call for help.
We had this problem with our stepson. He would refuse to wear anything but the same pair of jeans every day. He was having some emotional issues when he came to live with us at 14. He was having to adjust to a new school in a new state. His mother and stepfather had been abusing him. We were in counseling for a year. His mother refused to talk with him for an entire year. So yeah, lots of things were going on.
I resorted to sneaking into his room at night and swiping his jeans and washing them. His father took on the role of insisting on showers.
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M.M. answers from Tampa on August 04, 2011
I still as an adult, do not shower daily - more like 3-4 times a week, more if I'm sweaty or dirty. My daughter is probably going to be like me.
As for clothing, I will wear shirts and bottoms as often as I can - until they are dirty... saves on my having to do a lot of laundry on clothing that isn't really even dirty.
Regular body odor is not offensive to me.
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J.B. answers from Atlanta on August 04, 2011
What's her exact age? I think this can be pretty normal for younger teens. I remember going to drill team camp at 14 and one of my friend's moms begging us to make her shower! She didn't for 4 days of middle GA heat until we forced her into a shower! There were several girls like that and no drugs were involved.
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L.M. answers from New York on August 04, 2011
Yes, I think it falls into the catagory of normal. My girls get involved with other things and sometimes just forget. I don't know girls who wear clothes for more than 2 days, but I know boys who do. I won't worry to much about it. Just casually remind her every once in awhile.
Added: The average teen should not shower every day. I've been advised by a dermotologist that every other is good, or even every 3. Of course, things my vary due to activity levels and temperature conditions
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