Teaching Sleep

I second the folks who recommend Weissbluth's "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child". It's wonderful! Also, Weissbluth's pediatrics practice is in Chicago (near Northwestern hospital in the city). He offers sleep consultations for people who aren't patients. I think you can get all the info from the book, but if you really need to talk it out it's nice to know you can make an appointment with the expert himself!

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Hi D.,

My kids are too old for me to remember details (!), but we used Dr. Weissbluth's sleep training methods with our kids and they worked really well. Dr. Weissbluth is a cry-it-out person, so you have to be able to withstand that, and in our case, my husband is a stay-at-home dad and he took one for the team both times. Both times, though, it only took one time for them to adjust and then we were pretty much on a regular schedule.
Hope this helps,
S.
Mom of 6 y.o. and 3 y.o.

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Read "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr. Marc Weisbluth. He is a sleep expert, especially with young children. I thought my daughter was never going to sleep through the night at 9 mos old, and I swear- the first night we put into practice what we read, she slept through the night! My friend, a pediatric nurse, told me months before the baby was even born, that I should read it- and I sure wish I read it when she first told me to--I could've had more sleep, earlier! BTW, I haven't read the book all the way through. I only read the section that pertains to my child, when I'm having difficulties. It's rare now that she gives us a hard time, but when we find that trying different things is just not working- it's time to refer to the book again and see what's going on at that age/stage. Read it--you won't regret it!

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Looks like you got some good responses. I also suggest reading Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. Scheduled naps don't really develop until 12-16 weeks of age.

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Have you read the Weissbluth book, Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Baby?? We found it really helpful. My suggestion (based on the book!), would be to try and put your daughter to sleep even earlier, particularly as she isn't really napping during the day and yawns. We put our 6 month old to sleep between 6-7pm every day and he sleeps 12 hours...and that's with 3 naps a day. It sounds counterintuitive, but the book says that putting them to sleep even earlier, will help them sleep longer. Then you should try and put her down for a nap two hours after she wakes up. She may just be overtired all the time and so can't wind down. There is some "crying it out" involved which we weren't ready to do until our son was 5-6 months old, but it's an individual decision how to handle that. Maybe if you can get her sleeping earlier, she'll be less overtired during the day and then you can work on the naps.

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Hi D.,

You totally CAN get your baby on a sleep schedule. I did it with three! I started when they were born and 2 were sleeping straight through the night at 8 weeks and the last one by 12 weeks. Babies need us moms to guide them! They are BABIES for goodness sake! How can they possibly know what is best for them? They need us to direct them "this is the time to eat..this is the time to sleep...this is how much sleep you need".

I think the reason your baby is having trouble is becaise she is over-tired. At 2 months babies need between 15 and 15-1/2 hours of sleep in a 24 hour period. While they get more and more tired when they miss sleep, babies and children have more trouble overcoming that to fall asleep (think wound up cranky toddler!). Sleep begets sleep. The more sleep they lose, that harder it is to fall asleep.

I would highly recommend the book "Preparation for Parenting" which teaches about scheduling and sleep patterns, but also about the order (eat, wake time, nap). All of these things help baby have a restful, restorative nap and sleep time. It has been such a blessing to us and our family. It will bring order to the chaos and sweet peace into your lives. Let me know if you have any ?'s about how it works. Best wishes to you and congrats on being a new mommy!

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From everything I heard from my pediatrician and friends, babies aren't really ready to sleep train until about 4 months. Sleeping 4-5 hours at night @ 2 months is actually pretty phenomenal!!

Sleep with her bedding so it smells like you. Then see if she sleeps. 15 minutes is a good powere nap. Other issues may be keeping her up

This is a perfect time to begin sleep training.

I highly recommend The Baby Whisperer and The Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems.

There is also a web site that can help with your specific child related issues.

It is a long road to teaching your child to sleep properly, but well worth it if you do it properly. At this age, she really should be taking 3 to 5 naps a day.

I am so grateful to Baby Whisperer as I now have a child who sleeps independantly and needs very little time from me to help her go to sleep.

The focus now for her age is establishing the patterns so that your child can learn what to expect and how to wind down.

I understand many other people have recommended Dr. Weissbluth's book. Although I read it and got a lot of it, I feel that the Baby Whisperer books are a much more gentle approach for any mom who does not wish to allow her child to cry to learn to sleep.

Another similar approach is the Sleep Lady's Good Night Sleep Tight. This also talks to more gentle approaches to learning how to sleep.

For those daytime naps, make sure she is plenty full of fresh air and exercise. The fresh air knocks them ALL out. You can exercise her well first then outdoors for a walk in the stroller or whatever. Umbroller strollers are easily maneuvered in and out of apartments or holmes so you can keep baby in it for the nap. Don't keep it too quiet in your home. Keep music playing so baby is use to sounds and doesn't wake up. Music is soothing too. Keep the phone on a medium loud ring so as to not startle baby but to get her use to the ringing sound and your voice without disturbing her sleep.

You may want to check out the miracle blanket, and swaddle her. The kidoponomous blanket is good too. Maybe if you swaddle and rock until she is really out, you could then lay her in a boucy/carseat/etc. She'll feel more snug in there. Maybe use some white noise too, the static channel on a walkie talkie does well for this.

If you can't get her sleeping on her own, just try holding her for her naps for a few days. She's probably really overtired. If you can get her well rested, she will be ealier to sleep train.

Ideally you should settle her down for a nap when she's only been up 1 1/2 -2 hours. Probably three naps a day, and a bedtime between 6-8, would be a good routine for her age. I let my little one get too tired, keeping him up too long and it was terrible.

Healthy Sleep Habits would be my vote. Babywise seems to expect too much from babies. Yes, it may be convienent for parents, but babies weren't meant to be convienent. Helathy Sleep Habits keeps the development of the baby in mind. The 4 month mark is the big one, because babies brains aren't developed until then.

Of course every baby is different. I could tell my last wasn't ready for crying it out until over 6 months.

Try babywearing, like a sling. The closeness is awesome and the baby is secure enough to sleep. You can even get stuff done too.

Go get the book 12 Hours Sleep by 12 Weeks Old by Suzy Giordano. It is an amazing book!! My son was sleeping 12 hours a night at 7 weeks and still is at 7 1/2 mos. It is all about feeding schedule and napping. He naps 1 hour in the am and 2 hours in the afternoon. I hope it helps ( :

Yes, you can't and shouldn't train a baby to sleep until 4-5 months old. My second is 6.5 months and he would not sleep by himself until he was 5 months, so he slept on us. I was worried sleeping on us would prevent him from being able to sleep by himself, but no, he just needed to mature to have more of a routine and sleep more deeply. Small babies usually don't sleep deeply much, it's a defense mechanism and is normal.

Definitely try one or two of the books that others have recommended. I do want to mention though, that my oldest son, 10 yrs old now, slept almost just like yours, but woke up every 3 hours at night. His naps were about 20 minutes long, in his crib, while he was an infant. He still doesn't need much sleep, he goes to bed around 10pm and wakes up at 5am, refreshed and ready to go. You might have a child who just needs less sleep. Definitely try some of the methods other people mentioned, but don't get overly frustrated if your daughter still doesn't sleep as much as you thought she would. Kids surprise us that way.

Hi D.,

My daughter wouldn't nap at that age unless I was holding her. She would fall asleep at the breast and I just had to stay there if I wanted her to get naps. It was a tough few months, but soon after she turned 3 months, she went back to sleeping without me holding her. This went on from about 1 mth - 3 mths of age. I've talked with a number of women/friends and this seems to be very common at this age. My daughter also started sleeping through the night for 8-10 hrs at 7 weeks, so I just dealt with the day time issues. Just remember that she needs you. Will she fall asleep in your arms? You could see if a sling works and then you could still get stuff done.

Have you ever tried putting her down for a nap on her stomach? I am well aware that you should always put the child down on her stomach to sleep, because of SIDS, so everyone take it easy... but you can always lay her down on her belly if it is for a nap, when you can be right there watching. All of the pediatricians at the practice I go to have told me this is absolutely fine and it is actually not only good for digestion, but also most babies sleep much better this way. Just keep checking that she's breathing well and her color is good. You can check out the book Happy Sleep Habits, Happy Baby, at least I think that's the title. It outlines sleep periods your baby should have and has been helpful for me. All kids sleep differently, but if she's yawning throughout the day, she is tired and needs her sleep. Also you might want to try letting her cry a bit longer before you comfort her. It might take her a few minutes to settle herself and then pass out. I hope any of this helps you, because you and your little girl need more sleep than you're getting! Good luck!

I am also the mother to a two month old, formula fed, baby girl, and she is a wonderful sleeper. I would read the book "Babywise" - it helped us tremendously!!!! She's on a 3-4 hour eat/play/sleep schedule, so she gets a lot of rest during the day. We put her to bed at 8:00 pm, feed her again around 11:00 pm, and she sleeps through the night until 7:00 am. The book was a godsend to us!

I would read Healthy sleep habits happy child i think the author/dr. is weissbluth. or one of t. brazeltons sleep books. i think you might want to try to get her to bed clser to seven maybe 8 30 is too late. then i would try to put her down for her first nap at about 10 have a similiar routine for naps as you would bed probably shortened i.e read her a book or sing her a song, whatever it is do the same thing each time you put her down for a nap. you also may need to let her fuss for a short time as she may be trying to fall asleep and you go in and then she's up. i am sure she's overtired and once she falls into a schedule you will both be much happier. good luck, not sleeping is not fun!

AMEN to Laura!! You can train your child!! My daughter was sleeping through the night at 8 wks. and my son by 5 wks!! Both took two naps, each around 1 1/2 hours, each day until around a year/1 1/2, when they both went down to one 1 1/2 to 3 hour naps, depending on the days activities! Does your child like to be snuggled? The only reason I ask is b/c our 1st did not care where she slept, how she slept, when she slept, as long as she slept. Our son on the other hand was a different story. We soon found out that when he was snuggled in a blanket in your arms he slept great, but the instant he was out he woke up. So, it is not easy to keep a child wrapped in a blanket in their crib is it? No! But you can wrap them tight in their car seat(not buckled) and snuggle rolled blankets or burb cloths around them and put that in the crib! Our son slept at nigt and for naps like this for the first 1 1/2 months, then eventually he was fine without the wrapping and slept in his crib w/o the seat. It is perfectly fine to do, so said both my children's docs when they were little.(My daughter has had really bad allergies since born and she had to sleep many nights in her car seat, just so she could be elevated and breath)Put them on your schedule! It is possible. Also, with our son we had to go to just plain bottled water. Our daughter was on tap water with formula, but our son, for what ever reason did well with regular bottled water, that after purchased we filled up at the water station in the front of our store. My dentist said that nursery water was not that needed as in the only difference was the amount of flouride. I hope some of this might help. Alos, when letting them cry try 15 mins. instead of just 5. Usually around the 10 mark they stop.

I didn't have the nap trouble you are having, but I did use the book called the Baby Whisperer for our son's sleep routine and it can start as early as 8 weeks. We used it at 4 months but I would have tried sooner had I read the book sooner. I read the earlier you start the easier it is for the baby to get into a routine. There is a website www.babywhisperer.com but the book is a good read and has lots of information on all aspects of baby isuses. There is also a companion book worth having as well for more detailed information. good luck! -Judy

Have you tried wearing her in a sling during the day? I wonder if she would nod off with your movements?

Another vote for Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Dr. Marc Weissbluth. I instituted the techniques around 6 months and wish I would have started earlier!

I highly recommend "Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child" by Dr. Mark Weissbluth. My infant was the same way and 3 friends recommended this book. I "sleep-trained" my 6 month old to nap as he cat-napped all day long. He slept through the night from 6 weeks but he would get overtired during the day and cry continuously b/c he was simply overtired during the day. If you follow his advice, I guarantee it will work! I do recall though that 2 months old is too little to sleep train. I believe he said 4 months is the earliest due to their immature nervous systems. Good luck!! It worked and my now 5 year old will still take a nap if I make him lay down - the same infant that didn't sleep during the day until he was 6 months old. :)

You really can't teach a baby to sleep until 4-5 months old. Before that you just have to go by their pattern...

I agree with Mom G. you can't really get a baby to sleep in a pattern just yet. Actually it sounds like your baby has a very interesting pattern, just not the one that everyone else thinks the baby should have.

Hi D.,

My two sisters and I all used a book called, Baby Wise. It is an awesome, easy-to-read book that breaks down exactly what new mom's can do to get their babies on a sleeping schedule. The methods from the book worked like a charm for all seven of our kids. It may seem hard at first, especially hearing her cry, but after six weeks, she will be trained and you both will be much happier.

L.

Hi D.:

I highly recommend "Babywise." This book is a quick read and has made my life so much easier! You have to use your best judgement with some of it, but the key is the pattern to your day. It teaches you to never feed your child to sleep (and if you are doing that, it's not too late to fix it now). The pattern goes ... wake up and eat then play then sleep. Always associate playing and then sleeping. Your ped it right - whatever you find to help you teach your baby be sure you are 100% consistent and stick with it. Best of luck!!

Two months maybe a little young to try and get her on a regular nap schedule, at that age it is usually you on their schedule! I have three children and none of them would nap in their cribs until about 6-7 months old. You could try taking her for a walk in the stroller or a ride in the car, the kids usually fall asleep at that age when you are out. Sounds like you have a great bedtime routine going and be very thankful she sleeps that late in the morning, although it maybe difficult to get her for a morning nap if she sleeps till then but then you can try to put her for a nap around 12:30. If she will sleep in the bouncy or swing leave her be. At this age anything goes so just hang in there!

I had this exact same problem. I know how frustrating it is. We found out our baby had acid reflux and he was actually in pain so getting on medication helped and soy formula also helped. We still had trouble until he was about 4 months old. But it does get better. We started doing the nighttime routine and it really works now that he's 6 mos old. He's still not a great napper but he sleeps very well at night now. When they are that young they should only be awake for 2 hours before napping. Maybe you could try to pay attention to the time span between the short naps and just constantly put her in her crib when it hits that 2 hour mark. If that still doesn't work I promise it will get better with time.

Hi D.,
I've heard that you need to let a baby have his/her own sleep schedule until 4 months old. It was longer for my twins since they were born almost 10 weeks early. Now, some moms may say that they had their babies trained before this, I am just telling you when my twins' pediatrician told us to start. I am glad I followed her advice and didn't stress out about it. I just went with the flow and tried to be patient. A baby definitely changes the flow of a person's routine: )

Oh... and my babies often took a nap in their bouncy seats. The vibration from the chairs soothed them. The bouncy seats were lifesavers! (Ours were from Fischer Price.)

Good luck,

J.

Hi D.- I have a three month old and for naps you have to put them to sleep. I've read that babies don't fall asleep on their own until after 4 months of age. We have a routine for naptime - close curtains, turn on soft music, change diaper, read a story and then I rock him until he's just on the cusp of falling asleep (and we reserve the pacifier for naptimes and middle of the night awakenings). I put him in his crib and he usually wakes briefly realizing he isn't in my arms anymore but then (usually) falls back asleep. He only naps in his crib for 45 minutes. Once I got an 1.5 hour out of him. I've heard it gets better in terms of how long they nap for.

My guy didn't like his crib during the day either. It's something he's had to get used to. You can try putting her for a nap in her bouncy seat in the nursery so she gets used to napping in there. On days when he really won't settle for anything I resort to using his bouncy seat or the swing. Even then, I have to settle him to a point where he's relaxed and sleepy before putting him down in those. Have you tried white noise? We use a white noise sound machine in the nursery and on those days he won't go down - the bouncy seat is on the counter with the stove fan on high.

There are a couple of good books that i'm sure others can recommend. I can't think of the titles right now.

Good luck!

A child that young needs some help falling asleep. It is not until 3-4 months that they can begin to do some self soothing. I believe at that age they should be getting 15-16 hours of sleep. I have success with my 4 1/2 month old doing hour and a half wakeful times, then putting down for a nap. So he is awake for an hour and a half, then I walk him in a dark room with white noise, sing to him, pat his back, use a paci, sometimes the rocking chair...if you hit him at the right time he is usually pretty quick/easy to put to sleep. If not....it takes forever. But a 2 month old is not usually on a schedule like that. You just have to follow her cues. When she starts to act sleepy...less active, staring into space, yawning, start trying to put her to sleep. At that age I always found it hard to get them to sleep in a crib/bassinett, so I usually put them either in their carseat (with the buckles pulled out/aside and a blanket laid in it) or the swing. Something that keeps them at a 45 degree angle. Alot of young babies have trouble with reflux cause the sphincter isn't fully developed yet so that incline helps keep that from waking them up. Alot of times when they are that young, swaddling also helps (the swaddleme blanket is a life saver) or often I would just let them sleep on my chest/shoulder just so they would get some sleep/stay asleep.

A good balanced approach on sleep is Dr. Weissbluth's Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. At this age their brain development doesn't allow a schedule, but it would still help you and help you to recognize her cycles a little better. Most 2 month olds aren't going to be able to fall asleep all by themselves in a crib. They need a little soothing. Sucking, wrapping, singing, repetitive motion, white noise...something.

Do some research on Babywise before you buy it (I think just googling it would be sufficient for you to see the opinions out there). My hospital took the time to specifically recommend against using this method because when some people have followed it too stringently it resulted in failure to thrive for some infants. I was actually given a handout by my hospital about this, so that has made me very wary of this book. I think the American Academy of Pediatrics has issued some kind of warning about it.

I would agree with the posters who recommended Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child.