I.L. asks from Southfield, MI on October 29, 2009
Struggling to Be "Mommy" While on Bed Rest
I am 27wks weeks pregnant with my third child. Due to already going into pre-term labor and having two previous pre-term babies I have been put on bed rest for the remainder of my pregnancy. When I only had one child I seemed to be able to accomplish this with little problems. However, now with 2 children I am finding it hard to comply. Help...I need some advice from those of you out there that have gone through this. Obviously my first priority is to protect my unborn child, but how can I accomplish that while still being "mommy" to my other kids? What is realistic? I'm sure my hormones are making me more emotional about this then normal. I guess I'm just looking for some encouragment and any advice that you can give. Thank you!
H.H. answers from Atlanta on October 29, 2009
I have no other children and so I don't know how to advise you, but on this site there are so many women who are in the same boat as you are. I bet they'd have so much advise to offer.
Take care and all the best with you new precious bundle.
1 mom found this helpful
A.H. answers from Detroit on October 29, 2009
Yikes~ I had a hard time being on bed rest for a less than a week's time in the hospital, but I am sure being at home with kids is so much more harder.
Are the other two children old enough to help out or to 'make a game' of anything? (My guy loves to turn things into a game, so that's why I ask)>
I am going to leave the rest of this one up to those with more than one child as I can relate only a smidgen. But I would say hang in there the best that you can, try to stay positive as hard as it is and rest. (Kids pick up our emotions and moods so easily- if you are in a good state of mind, maybe things for them will go easier too... like having them help out with small things they can do.)
Be safe and best of luck!
L.W. answers from Detroit on October 31, 2009
Hi I.-I have been there twice (once with an 8 month old and this last time with a 5 and 6 year old), and my pregnancies were the toughest things I have ever had to go through. When I am pregnant, I am completely useless almost the whole 9 months! It is a very emotional and lonely time because even when a fabulous huband/father is taking on everything you used to do...it keeps the family very busy/just trying to get through stuff....and you end up feeling so 'alone' with time ticking by soooooooo slowly. My advice is to let your husband take over, tell him often how much you appreciate it, and make sure you have a time of day each day that is just yours/your childrens' (ie 25 min of story time with a great old fashioned story book). Hang in there because it is only 13 more weeks and before you know it you will have an amazing little blessing and the greatest gift you could EVER give your other two. Try to keep yourself busy---knit, watch tv, read good books, write some old friends, and absolutely ASK friends to come visit! You will get through it day by day, week by week, and it will soon be a distant memory :)
Very best to you!
K.M. answers from Detroit on October 30, 2009
I hear you I have been there trying to save a baby from miscarrage trying to be a mommy to four. I don't know how old your oldest is. But you may need to sit him down and explain somewhat of whats going on and let him know you need lots of help till baby comes. Most of the help needs to be with him helping you with his young brother. Getting you things when asked maybe once in a while helping you out with maybe fetching a glass a water for baby and mom. Maybe he can bring you diapers and wipes and help the little guy get up on the bed or cotch so you can change him. When you get up to fix them food or for yourself I would get everything you need out than sit on a bar stool or at the kitchen table and make there meal than have the bigger brother help put stuff away and have him clean up either use paper plates or maybe have him put the dishes on the counter by the sink so when daddy gets home he can clean it up. If you have to cook on the stove do the same thing but sit on the stool by the stove with all the ingrediants. Maybe ask friend or relative to come help you if they can. You are a good mom and don't feel bad for asking for help right now not only does your hubby need to be on bored but your oldest and friends and family. Believe me they will help. Your are I am sure doing fine you just feel like your not. Also explain to the oldest if you close your eyes he needs to help a little more with the little brother. You will be suprised they feel so big whenyou ask and they love to help out. Good luck and I will keep you in our prayers. Oh ya one more thing have him bring like a game or books so you can read have him rub your back or shoulders for you that will make them feel good too have the little one do it too. They will ove to help mommy and baby feel good.
S.M. answers from Saginaw on October 30, 2009
Hello I., Sorry to hear that you are going through this. What we do for our children, huh? I have not dealt with this exact issue, but had many major surgeries while my 3 children were very young. Have everything you need within reach of were you are laying. Diapers, wipes, reading books for the kids, none perishable snacks like muffins, dry cereal. Have your hubby pack you lunches before leaving for work. Google some old fashion games that you can talk your kids through like red light, green light to keep them busy. The more you can burn off their energy, the better behaved they will be for you. Assign them as your "big helpers". If you can swing the cost, hire a baby-sitter who can come after school to assist with taking the kids for walks, or to the park. That way the kids have something to look forward to and you can use the time to listen to relaxation CD's. LOL Hope this helps. Congrats!!