Stress over Baby's Slow Weight Gain, Milk Supply Issues

I would not worry. My baby girl was 4 month yesterday and only weighs 12lbs. The doc said she is healthy as a horse! She eats when she wants to. Sometimes she wants it every 2 hours, other times she goes 6, just when she is hungry she eats. She is also chewing on her hands. It is more than likely early teething and new discovery. They are finding their hands and wanting to do new things! Don't panic and just relax! Enjoy this precious time with your little one!

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Honestly it sounds to me like this has become a major source of stress for you both. I think you need to re-evaluate the situation. If it is really that difficult, maybe you should switch to formula. Nursing is supposed to be an enjoyable and pleasant experience for you both. Not a source of stress and anxiety. Mentally commit to how much longer or what further measures you are willing to take to get the nursing thing worked out. Then, if it works great. And if not, you will know you have done the best you can and it IS ok to use formula. I have two children. I tried to nurse the first and it didn't work out and I totally beat myself up about it. With my second nursing did work out, we nursed for the first year. With these experiences I have realized that nursing isn't always for every one, and we should be grateful that we have alternative solutions for those cases. It is not a sign of failure if nursing doesn't work out. I'm not saying you should give up, I'm just saying don't beat yourself up over this. :) Good luck!

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You are doing a great job, and congratulations for breastfeeding.
My dd almost always reflects my emotions.
When you are nursing when do you switch sides? sometimes watery, mucusy stools are from hindmilk and foremilk imbalance. Nursing from one side at a time can help her get more fatty milk. Or could be a sensitivity so something you are eating.

First though, try to relax, even have a glass of wine and trust yourself and Stella. Do any you need to relax. Sometimes taking fish oils can help your mood too.

Only in rare cases vomiting and diarrhea may be symptoms of metabolic disorders, you could ask a doctor to test for these.

Some things that could help her take the breast patience and persistence. Try other nursing positions, nurse in motion like in a rocking chair, use skin to skin contact. Focusing your attention of touching can comfort both of you, also taking warm baths together.

Try expressing a little milk before you offer so there is milk more immediately. If either of you becomes upset take a break and try again later. You can always feed her with an eye dropper or feeding syringe.

Here's some website to see:
http://www.lowmilksupply.org/
www.kellymom.com
http://www.drjacknewman.com/Breastfeeding-help.asp

I know that's a lot. I hope it helps.

H.

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First you are doing GREAT!!!! Take a couple of breaths and let it come.
I have a couple of things I wanted to share with you about my kids. So that you know you are NOT alone.
My son David had the worse time nursing. No matter how much I tried, it would take 20 - 40 min to get him to latch on each side. I figure he had issues with his jaw. I use to get so upset, and frustrated that he just had so many issues with nursing. But I stuck with it, and he nursed for a year. I have worked with families that chose to switch over to bottles. And this was a good choice for them.
Try putting a drop of lavender oil on your collar, this will help you and the baby relax a little.
With my first child I thought I was the worse mother. I was told that new babies nursed every 2 hours for 5 - 10 min each side. This was 23 years ago. Well, Jessie wanted to nurse every 4 hours for 30 min each side. There was this nurse that told me I was "starving" my child. I died inside. I remember after my attempt to wake her up and feed her, I put her in the bassinet and rolled her down to the nursery and told the nurse there that I was a bad mother and did not deserve to have my baby. The nurse put her arm around me, and told me I was doing great. I then told her I as starving my daughter and she looked at the feeding chart that they had us do. She then told me that my daughter as a little pig and was doing great.

The rule of thumb is that as long as your little one is gaining, it is ok. Some children grow slower than others.

Take your time, and enjoy your little one. Don't worry as much, and if your heart tells you to get her checked then listen to your heart.

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I can totally sympathize with you. I my daughter was born 7 weeks early and weighed 3 lbs. 1 oz. I pumped every 3 hours for the first 4 months! My breastmilk really never came in and I tried everything. I finally ditched the pump, breast fed exclusively, and began going to acupuncture. I had near immediate results in increasing my supply after the acupuncture. If your insurance doesn't cover it, some places offer a discount for certain insurance holders. Unfortunately, she decided to self-ween at 5 months. I was sad, but a little relieved to be rid of the pump and tons of stress over breast feeding.

Regarding your daughter's weight. My little girl has NEVER been on the charts. Since she was so early, we see a pediatric dietician in addition to other specialists. She has reassured us that she's got time to catch up. I'd ask your doctor about speaking with a pediatric dietician. In addition to breast milk, I mixed it with a high calorie formula mixture. She's now 7 months and right at 13 lbs. Slow going, but she's worth the wait...or weight!

I'd be happy to recommend my acupuncturist if you're in the Portland area!
K. T.

A., just a little note. I struggled with this in the beginning and ruined my first few weeks enjoying my daughter by having postpartum, stress and no milk with the baby crying the whole time. I was determined to breast feed and in the end (after bloody nipples, no milk and 8 hour feedings) had to go with formula. Of course, from there it was finding something that didn't make her break out or sick. In the end it was rice milk, but she is happy and healthy now and we ended up just having one from the stress. I'm glad things worked out and I'm in awe of your determination. Good luck.

heya :) ... our first was diagnosed with Failure to Thrive : P

two things:

1) mucous in the stool might be related to either a food sensitivity of some sort (watch what you eat and see if you can track down a culprit, and watch if it is timed with the formula) or lactose intolerance (sounds like not if you have her doing better now; breastmilk is high in lactose--lactose builds the brain, and we humans do a lot of brain building!!). (Food sensitivities: I've discovered that bananas cause green horrible baby poops, apples and pears cause gas, and citrus or tomatoes cause diaper rash ... pretty instantly in each case, in my kids ... )

2) We once saw a loss of B-6 after a vaccination. I have Utterly No Idea why that would have been related to the vaccination, but that was the only 'odd' thing going on in her life right then (I had my breastmilk tested and B-6 levels were fine). The ped gave her a shot of B-6 to restore her levels and we didn't have problems after that (but I don't vaccinate 'on schedule,' either). It was at that point that she stopped growing (Failure to Thrive was why he thought to test for B-6) ... the shot fixed it. If your daughter is back on track now, yay :)!, but this might be something to watch for ... dunno if you vaccinate. Oh.... now that I think of it, that vaccination was probably the one when she had the seizure (hence, we don't vaccinate on schedule) ... I wonder if the seizure-activity somehow used up her B-6 or turned off her body's absorption ... anyhow, again, dunno how it might be related, but something to watch for.

You may want to see a gastroenterologist or discuss with your doctor the possibility of a (cow's) milk-protein allergy. It doesn't sound like your milk supply is the only problem here. The mucous in the stool is a concern.

You're doing great. Relax and trust your instincts.

In our home the problem was initially over supply but slow weight gain due to reflux and nursing difficulty. I'm sure lots of folks will comment on ideas to help supply and gaining (sounds like you've got great resources in hand!), but I'm mainly responding because of your comment on PPD.

Many of my friends have experienced the scenario that babies eating (hr to hr, day to do) and weight gain (week to week) has been directly tied to their mood. I experienced the same thing, but was not able to see through the fog of tiredness and frustation that my swings were probably outside of the realm of "normal". My husband, family, and friends were all concerned, but no one was able to get through to me that maybe I was more than just a little blue. I pulled through on my own, but in retrospect I was a lot more depressed than I acknowleged to myself.

With the help of your providers you will most likely figure out weight gain and milk supply issues, but take your feelings of possible depression very seriously and talk to your providers (and family/friends) about them as part of the overall conversation about baby-mama wellbeing. And make sure your lac consultants are working WITH your doc - turned out after about a month of lac consultant lead weigh-ins, nursing consults, etc. that my doc was not actually so concerned with my daughter's weight gain. Knowing that critical piece of information instead of solely listening to the lac RNs (who are great for many other things!) would probably have alleviated some of my stress and depression.

Good luck - keep your community close and TALK about your feelings!

Hi A.. I'm glad your milk supply seems to be better! I am a HUGE fan of breast feeding and feel it is obviously the best for any baby. BUT, I also believe that if it is causing constant stress or isn't providing quite enough nourishment for the baby that supplimenting with formula is OK. My baby was 5lb 11oz at birth and I ended up in emergency surgery 18 hours after she was born. Due to my own health issues (and being unavailable for her first day of life) my daughter had to have formula from the beginning. I did breast feed for about 3 weeks, desperately trying to pump and feed her as much as I could. After 3 weeks I was so exhausted and my milk supply was still not coming in. I finally gave up and she has been on formula even since. She is a happy, healthy 14m old now and has only been sick 2 times since birth. Formula feeding isn't the end of the world and babies are PERFECTLY HEALTHY who are formula fed. I regret that I couldn't BF longer but our time bottle feeding was intimate and sweet and we bonded just fine.

Sorry, I'm not trying to be a formula advocate or anything. I guess I'm just saying that if BF doesn't work out as long or as well as you wanted it's not the end of the world and your baby will not be sickly or deprived in some way if you have to give formula too. I do hope it all works out though!

I have lived this problem. We dipped down to the first percentile on the growth chart. We had medical test to make certain all was well. she was labeled failure to thrive a gut wrenching term to me. She was happy and healthly just gained slowly. Her doctor knew i was doing a good job and this was just how she was going to be. To this day she is underweight with a very high metabolism. I could feed her all day and she still doesn't gain well. Just relax. If you stress aboutit she will feel your stress. They may suggest you bottle feed after nursing so you know how many ounces she is getting at a feeding . All is well don't let the scale and her weigh ins stress you out. Just concentrate on keeping her happy and healthly. all will be well.
M.

Hi A.. Glad to hear things have gotten better for you, but just in case, I thought I'd give you our story... When he was three days old, we took our son back to the hospital as he was jaundiced and there was blood in his urine. It was then that I realized my milk hadn't come in yet and he was starving, poor thing. The nurses at the hospital suggested I supplement with formula through a syringe and hose taped to my breast so as not to give him "nipple confusion". In the end, my milk supply was always low and we ended up giving my son 2 ounces of formula in a bottle after every feeding, which he got used to and we got used to. I also tried pumping, drinking mother's milk, etc., but my milk supply never came up to what it was supposed to be. I suspect that my son never suckled hard enough, as when other mothers talk about the pain of breast feeding, I have no idea what they're on about (I never felt any pain whatsoever). Anyway, "nipple confusion" is thought by many (including myself) to be a bit of a myth, so I wouldn't worry about giving your daughter formula some of the time and breast milk when you can. My son is now 20 months old, happy, healthy and in the 75th percentile where weight is concerned. Good luck!

Hi A., It sounds like you are doing better now than when you originally wrote you email. It sounds like you situation isn't permenant, so you would only need supplimental milk for a little while. Hopefully you won't need suppliments at all!

I was going to mention that you can get breast milk from the Milk Bank. The nearest one on the West Coast is in Denver. www.bestfedbabies.org It's a pay if you can situation. Other cities (portland) are attempting to set up milk banks, too.

Our baby lost 28% of her body weight in the first couple of weeks after she was born. She's doing great now, constantly in the 50-75th body size percentile. There's hope!

Thank you for writing your update. It's heartening to know that things have improved for you.

I have not had a similar experience, but wanted to give you some encouraging words. I would suggest going to formula. Formula has lots of nutrients that your little one needs, just like the breastmilk. I agree with the Lactose intolerant. I would do some research on that.
My little girl who is almost one, had a lot of ear infections and was on milk based formula. We switched her to soy formula and no more ear infections.
Kids are like puzzles, you have to be patient to see what works.
As far as her weight, as long as she is happy, active, making progress like rolling over, eye contact, sounds, etc. she is fine. I have a friend who has two really petite girls. I think her two year old finally weighs 20 lbs. They are both healthy, just smaller.
Keep up the excellent work! You are a great mom!!

Have you heard about the book "Mother Food" by Hilary Jacobson? It is a very thorough book of food and herbs that increase (or decrease) milk supply. There are also sections on colic, weightloss, and low milk supply, among others.

Definitely worth having if you are committed to breastfeeding.

My son had some trouble at about 2 weeks with a cold. He was stuffed up and had trouble nursing for a couple of weeks. In fact, he had so many colds his first fall/winter that he learned to sit up very early because we had to keep him upright to try to get the crud to drain out. He slept in a swing or carseat often and when feling a little better, his bassinette was raised on one end for the drainage and for reflux.

So, keep doing what you are doing and keep your little one healthy. But, definitely look into the "Mother Food" book. Well worth it.

My daughter was slow in gaining weight, also. She is still tiny and considered small for gestational age. She is now 3. We went through many weight checks between scheduled check-ups, but the most important thing to look at, development. If she is developing and meeting milestones, not lethargic and wanting to sleep more than "normal," then chances are, she is getting what she needs when she needs it.

D.

Good for you for getting a massage. Taking care of your self is a BIG part of the equation.

I initially had some serious struggles with breastfeeding. I got upset, my son got upset, and we quickly got into a vicious circle. It became very apparent that my state of mind had the biggest impact on feedings. If I was anxious, my son would struggle to latch on and have a hard time staying on. My anxiety also impacted how quickly my milk would let down.

My recommendation to you is to do what you can to take care of yourself. Get a massage, take a bath, have a friend come for a visit….etc…..and don’t forget to breathe. It will all work out.

Good luck!

P.S. Did they get to the bottom of the issues with the vomiting and diarehea? If not, I would continue to pursue the cause of that. This may be contributing to the issue.

Did they ever diagnose the cause of the blood and mucus in her diarrhea? I suggest you take your daughter to Children's Hospital and get to the bottom of this. It's not you! There seems to be an underlying health issue affecting your daughter and you need to find out what it is and treat it. Keep nursing and hang in there! Good luck!

A. - I know you've had a lot of responses already, so I'll keep it short!

My sister has had three children, all barely hanging on the growth chart after 9 weeks old. They are now 6, 4, and 1 and are healthy little kids - still tiny, but healthy! One thing to consider is that the growth chart most commonly used includes a lot of formula fed babies who weigh a lot more during the first year (on average) than breastfed babies. Your body and babies body adjust to each other every day when exclusively nursing. Hormones and the nutrients in the milk change all the time depending on what baby needs. Don't worry!

And remember - it takes tiny kids like yours and huge kids like mine to even make an average on a growth chart!!
js

I wish more women had a good social network of friends to help with issues like this. It seems like a large amount of breast-feeding moms have similar experiences brought on by the medical community.

So long as the vomiting and bloody stool situation was cleared up it sounds like your daughter is fine.

My son was born at 7lb 14oz (totally normal) and he's now about 6" shorter than all of his friends (he's 5). That means that he just doesn't grow as fast as the "normal" child.

Also, my friends baby always was chewing on his hand. It doesn't have much to do with being hungry. That's like saying a child that needs a pacifier is always hungry. Infants are oral and use it to learn about their environment.

It sounds like you're doing great. Keep with the breast-feeding. DO NOT suppliment or your milk supply will to down for real. Feed her every 10 minutes if she needs it, it will increase your milk. Most of all.. RELAX! :)

Hi A.,
My name is B., and I am raising my neice, who was born premature at 5 lb, 10 oz. She is not just over 17 months old, and weighs 20 lbs. Kira was breastfed for the first 3 weeks of her life, but even in the Hospital didn't take enough at a time to do the trick. They started to suplement on the second day with formula. Kira and her birth Mom had such trouble breastfeeding that eventually it felt to the mom that Kira didn't like her, and that added to the post partum depression she was feeling. Anxiety over doing everything right for this beautiful new baby, anxiety over her not eating, feelings of being useless because she didn't know what she was doing wrong. It all added up. The Birth Mother is a special Adult, but I think that what she went through is pretty typical of any new mother, as least it was for me many years ago.
Kiras was put on Pedia sure instead of Formula around 4 months old I think-it's hard to remember now. She is doing better, but still not making any gains in weight percentiles. The bottle is always available to her, so she can eat anytime she wants, which seems wrong to me, as grazing is known to be an issue with overwieght kids, but obviously, she's not overweight-far from it.
I try to remember that not all kids are alike, infact they are all different. And what works for one may not work at all for another.(My first two were normal in every way so this one is quite a challenge to me) She did not crawl until she was 12 mos. and didn't walk until 15 mos. and now I'm worried about her speech not progressing. Anyway, kids come in all shapes and sizes, and just because your seems really small, does not mean she's about to die, rather she will be a cute little petite thing that all the boys love to protect when she gets older. (My first two are teens now). Work closely with your pediatrician, and if you don't feel like your getting what you need from them, find another. Keep fighting for her, you are her champion, and will be always!

Good days and happy kids to you,
B. K

My daughter is 4 months old and weighs 10pounds 2 oz. The doctor said she was perfect. She is about the 50% for weight but that is considered average. Just relax if your baby was loosing weight then you would want to be concerned. Just know that she will eat when she is hungry. Some days they eat like there is no tomorrow other days you are lucky to get them to eat 6-8 ounces. Just tell yourself that she is okay and you can get through this! I will say a little prayer for you. Take care and good luck.
When I thought I was going through postpartum depression I had to remind myself on a daily basis that "This too shall pass".
Best Wishes,
Cori

Hi A.,

I was in a similar situation. We actually had to supplement with a tube and boy was that fun. It took about 3 months of pumping, fenugreek and lots of stress. My daughter had lost quite a bit of weight due to not getting enough milk from me. I worked with the lactation consultants and kept supplementing with some formula and a bottle (the tube syringe thing just wasn't giving my daughter enough) and then at 4 months I went cold turkey on just nursing and I'm happy to say I happily and successfully nursed my daughter to 29 months!! It was so stressful and scary and I was always worried that she wasn't getting enough but it finally worked out. I also took the prescription drug - Reglan but you have to be careful about depression when taking this drug.

Good luck and hang in there. It's a hard place to be. So many times I almost gave up and just went to formula but I kept trying and it worked out for me and it was soo right to nurse as long as I could after fighting the battle for so long to nurse.

Deb

A.,
My son and daughter were slow gainers. They are twins. My son (2 yrs 5 months) just barely made the 3rd percentile at his 2 year appointment. I spent a LOT of time worrying about it. We went to a nutritionist had various tests done and what it came down to is that he is a small eater and has a very high metabolism. Much of it is genetics (I was very small at their age--oh to have that metabolism now!). We did discover that my son had reflux. WE got him on Pepcid which was helpful in taming the crying and back arching during feeding. You might ask your doctor about that. I wonder what the docs are saying about the diarrhea etc? She may have a stomach bug or something that is keeping her from gaining. But ultimately, the best thing you can do is relax, trust your docs and try to do best by her. My kids, while they are small, are bright and lively. I wouldn't trade it. It was kind of fun having them small for longer. You only get that once. Best to you!
D.

I don't have any concrete answers. Every child and situation is different and especially stressful this early in the child's life. My older daughter, now 4 1/2, would latch on and immediately fall asleep - from the time she was born until she was over three weeks old. She continued to lose weight all that time, and did not get back up to birthweight until 5 weeks old.

I remember how scary it was and how afraid I was. I had a home nurse that came to us twice a week to weigh her and to help me with different techniques (such as a special nipple to put over yours that makes sucking a bit easier) or a small "straw" thingy that I put pumped breastmilk in and then slipped into her mouth while nursing her (to get extra calories in her tummy...)

My milk supply did drop and I never could get it back. My nurse found herbs that helped most people get more milk, but it my case it didn't help. You could try them as well (Fenugreek and Brewer's Yeast). I had to supplement with formula, and it made me very sad as I had wanted to breastfeed exclusively. However, I came to realize that although breastfeeding is the best option, the most important thing is to get her fed and growing. I continued to breastfeed as much as I could.

She always was slow to gain weight.. At one point she was in the 95%tile for height, but only the 5%tile for weight. However, she is healthy and fine now and actually starting to gain more weight than she should.

I guess the only advice to give you is
1) don't be too hard on yourself. You obviously love your little girl and are taking the best care of her.
2) trust your instincts more than the doctors. If you don't feel she is getting what she needs, keep pushing until you are satisfied
3) know that even if she continues to have problems - there are further medical assistances that can be provided and eventually you will get her to grow and thrive.

I wish you peace. God Bless

Way to go!! Keep trying to bring down your stress level and anxiety. Even if it's not causing physical issues, it's clearly causing psychological ones. One more thing you can try to help your supply is to wear your baby and keep her in contact with you as much as possible. I don't know why it works, but I've heard it to be very helpful. We had eating issues around 9 months, but we were able to get through it and my daughter continues to breastfeed at least 10 times daily! :) If you're not connected to any other mamas, check out a group on meetup.com. The Eastside Attachment Parenting group might be good for you especially since many of the moms breastfeed and can at least offer support! The address is meetup.com/eastsideap

I had trouble nursing both my children. Both children were born over 10 lbs. My sound 10lbs 6oz did not come home for 10 days and although I pumped, I didn't pump enough. I started nursing when he came home he nursed a lot every 45 min some times and I finally had to regularly supplement--with 8 oz. And I was still exhausted. Exhausted. And defeated.

And he was a big baby at four months, but I was too tired to do any more and I gave in and used the bottle. He took too bottles at every feeding. At six months he was 20 pounds--he looked liked a year old. Very tall, when he stood up.

My daughter was 10 lbs 0oz at birth. And she came home right a way. She was a hungry baby and very active. And breast fed. At 5 months she only weighed 13 lbs but I fed her whenever she wanted to eat and she was on a schedule. So the doc put her on rice pablum earlier than normal. She gained some weight-but just moved faster. Eventually she put herself on a vegan diet. She stopped nursing a nine months. She has always been tall, fit, thin, and eats-eats and-eats.

It is tough having a baby who gains weight slowly. You always feel like there is more you should do. Or at least I did. my daughter is almost 2 and still low on the size charts. Some kids will always be at the bottom and that's ok. The chart is made of avg so not everyone can be in the middle.
In the meantime continue feeding her and try not to stress. Stress could reduce your milk supply. The dr may have suggestions of how to supplement. I basically breastfed on demand to feel like she was getting enough food. They will tell you when they are hungry or full.

I have had slow weight gain issues with my son since he was born. I use to think it was me. He is almost 2 and a half now. And I have figured out it is him. He has the metabolism that I dream of. Now he eats and eats and eats, but doesn't gain a pound. He is my skinny Minnie.

As far as the Fenugreek, try taking Blessed Thistle as well. It is something to do with the combo. I also ate Oatmeal like it was going out of style. And once in a while I would throw in a beer in between feedings. I did everything I could. And I actually did it twice, with each of my boyz.

You probably are exactly right . . . stress will kick your tush and she will sense it more than anyone else! Relax, this is the best time of your life, until tomorrow. I know that is easier said, but it's really the truth! These moments only come around once in a lifetime, enjoy them!!

HiAmber,
My daughter was very very small too. She did not gain weight very well at all. I worried too, as all mothers do. I was grateful for the dr. who told me not to worry. She is eating and babies will eat when hungry. My daughter also nursed really poorly. It took me two whole months before she finally latched on properly. That was after five visits to the hospital and lot of tears. Today she has finally gained some weight. She is now four and a half and finally hit forty pounds. She is also super tall though too. I recently found a pair of jeans for her to wear without using the things on the sides to make them smaller.. I know how hard it is and being stressed does make it harder, but you do what is best. Try and relax and enjoy nursing her. She will feel you calm down and it will make her calm too. Best luck to you momma. Sorry if I have typos, my son is trying to help!
B.

It sounds like you already know what to do. Yes, your anxiety can affect your milk supply and your daughters willingness to nurse.
I have 5 month old twins, and my girl twin wasn't quite 5# when we brought them home. She didn't have very strong nursing reflexes and was very tired. We were told to supplement with a breastmilk bottle after every feeding. She did not need the supplement... It took a little bit to build up my milk supply, but when it came in she turned her nursing habbits around (to say the least).
Are you exclusively breastfeeding? Or do you supplement with formula?
I recommend continuing to nurse ON DEMAND. When she acts hungry, take some deep calming breaths and go about it in as noncelant (sp?) a manner as possible. It's also possible that she is going through another growthspurt, they are pretty constant right now, I know.
When the twins go thru their spurts I feel like I don't have enough milk to keep up, but really it just takes a few days for "the girls" to get the idea and increase the supply.

I hope this helps! Good luck and you are a WONDERFUL MOM for trying as hard as you have. Remember ANY amount of breastmilk will benefit your baby.

Congratulations!

A.,

Sounds like you have received lots of advice. I have another avenue to add to what has been said and that is nutritional supplementation. What we get from our food is just not enough to sustain good health anymore with the low nutrient value even in organic food and the toxins that come our way in food, air and water. The other huge factor as was mentioned is stress! It depletes our body nutritionally. This all effects weight gain and milk supply. We have seen significant results as we have helped people with the Reliv nutritional products including mom's milk supplies increasing and children with failure to thrive having an increase in appetite and putting on weight. We educated people about these products (and business to those interested in impacting others health) and let you decide if it is for you. Let me know if you want more information. M.

Hang in there, A.. I too suffered from low milk supply, pumped after every daytime feeding for 6-8 weeks, took medication and finally after what seemed like forever (about 2 months) I was able to develop the breastfeeding relationship with my son that I wanted. Although some of those days were the longest, hardest days where I was so discouraged and often wanted to stop breastfeeding and just go to formula.

Think carefully if you are considering using formula (as one person suggested) as the BF system is based on supply and demand. My experience was to have my son nurse more frequently and then pump afterwards. You may not get much when you pump but the goal is to "empty" your breast. The more often the milk from your breasts is drained, the more milk you will produce. See Dr. Jack Newman's website for more information http://www.drjacknewman.com/default.asp

And as you mentioned, try not to stress. Try to relax. Maybe take a few deep breaths before you start nursing and continue the deep, relaxed breathing while you nurse in a quiet place with your baby.

One last thing, keep in mind that growth charts are based on formula fed babies. Ask your doctor to use a growth chart for BF babies. Formula fed babies tend to eat 1/3 more per day than BF babies. Also Dr. Jack Newman, breastfeeding expert, discusses slow weight gain here: http://www.drjacknewman.com/Breastfeeding-help.asp
See the Slow Weight Gain Following Early Good Weight Gain

Good luck!

I'm glad to hear that things are going better. I really feel for you, because I went through something similar. My little guy was a really erratic eater, and as a first time mom, I got totally stressed out about it. My supply dropped, and I started doing all sorts of stuff to try to increase my supply--pumping, supplements, tea, you name it. Nothing really worked, and I finally got so stressed that my let-down reflex stopped and I was taking oxytocin nasal spray. I was depressed and constantly weepy. To make a long story short, when my son was 12 weeks, I started exclusively pumping and giving him breastmilk through the bottle. At first i had to supplement a bit with formula, but after a week or so, I was pumping enough. My mood improved dramatically and My let-down reflex returned as well! I ended up pumping for the next 7 months--not always an easy task! The moral of the story? I am convinced that my problems were at least 90% caused by stress and anxiety. My son is now 18 months and still an erratic eater. Sometimes he eats great, and sometimes hardly at all. I am now expecting my second, and I am really hoping that I am able to take things in stride. I would love nothing more that to have a normal breastfeeding relationship. Looking back, I believe that if I could have dealt with my anxiety, I could have saved myself many hours of pumping! My advice--do everything you can to manage your stress and anxiety--they are your biggest enemies! Btw, breastfed babies do go through weight plateaus.

She was sick. She didn't feel good. You are worried. Anxiety is the biggest curtailer to milk production. Watch what you're eating. She may have a food sensitivity that is being passed thru in your milk. Are you consuming a healthy amount of dairy? How about foods that cause gas? Acidic fruits or vegetables? Garlic or other spices? When you nurse, get comfortable. Pour yourself a glass of water, even a small glass of wine. Relax and your milk will release. Take your time to nurse her. Tickle her under her chin if she starts to drowse off so she nurses you down. Only eating a little bit will lower your body's expectation of need. Use a warm bucky pillow for her stomach to keep her calm after feeding, it's soothing (or a hot water bottle, not hot but warm wrapped in a receiving blanket), prop it up against her stomach. For right now, she's in charge of your daily clock. Feed her on demand, when ever she appears to be hungry, at least every 2-3 hrs. How many wet diapers does she have during a day? As long as she's gaining weight, I wouldn't worry too much. She'll hit a growth spurt and catch up and you'll be concerned about her being in the 95% for her weight. When she goes thru the growth spurt, she eat and sleep, sleep and eat for about a two week period and then none of her clothes will fit the same way. If she continues to have mucuousy stools, could be she has an infection. Your dr will probably want a stool culture when you bring her in. So be sure to collect it to take to the appt. Best of luck!! and enjoy her, it goes by much, much too fast.

RELAX.... I'm glad you got a massage.(partially because I am an LMT and think everyone should get more.) The stress is probably your biggest culprit. I have two girls and a third on the way. Both my girls were slow weight gainers and barely made 16 pounds by age 1and 20 pounds by age 2. They are now 6 and 3 years old and on the smaller side, but not tiny. They are healthy. I have had pediatricians really stress over the weight gain and I have had pediatricians who have been very calm and realize everybody grows at their own rate. Of course I liked the second better. I know it can be very hard when you are in the thick of it, but this too will pass and better for you and your baby if you can not worry and let her go at her own pace. Babies will eat when they are hungry. Good luck. Namaste

I am so sorry you are having a tough time. I have been there and it is REALLY stresfull! I have two kids and nursing was just fine with my daughter but I had all the same problems you are having when my son was born. Turns out he was lactose intolerant. If I would eat any milk, cheese, or any other dairy he would have problems. Once I stopped eating dairy (it actually takes about 10 days to be completely out of your system) my son thrived!!

Do some research on lactose sensativity and try taking dairy out of your diet!! I really hope this works for you. (Be careful though...it is amazing all the things that have lactose in them...you have to read labels carefully.)

THe good news is that at about 18 months my son completly grew out of his sensativity and he has no problem with dairy now.

Good Luck!!