21 answers

Still Wetting Her Pants...

I am the mother of 2 beautiful girls- 5 & 7. Father and I are still married and do our best to parent as a team. our dilema is that our 7yo still wets herself. She was alittle sluggish to potty train, but finally had it by 4yr. She even stayed dry most of the nights during the week. She starting regressing about 4 months before her 6th birthday. She was wetting the bed more, then she started having "accidents" during the day. She started kindergarten off really well, but by the end of the year was needing a change of clothes at least once a week - or I could tell she had been wet and her clothes had dried again. In first grade we talked to every teacher she had and the school nurse-- made special arrangments for her to sit closest to the bathroom, be able to get up at any time without having to wait for permission, and be first in line when class went as a whole. By the end of the year none of that mattered - same problem.

The pediatrician suggested a voiding cyctogram. I used to be a pediatric nurse and could not rationalize putting my daughter through the trauma of being catheterized at the age of 7yr -- she would remember EVERYTHING! So we did not have the test-- which may have been inconclusive anyway.

I was a bedwetter until I was 11yr, and stilll had the occassional "accident" when I got older into high school. I have even done it as an adult!! (under the affects of certain medications and I have sleep apnea)
But I find myself losing patience with her more and more because I think when I try to talk with her about it that she just tells me things that she thinks I want to hear.
She trys to tel me how hard she is trying to stop wetting during the day, but I cannot seem to understand having to change clothes 3 times a day!

Now 2nd grade will be starting soon and I cannot bear to send her another school year having to run to the nurse to change clothes almost everyday. Any suggestions from anyone??

1 mom found this helpful

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Featured Answers

I personally have emergency visits to the bathroom when I drink soda. See if that helps. Talk to and find out if anything is stressing her out. Or if she dosnt want to sit on the potty cause its dirty. Good luck.

Have you tried taking her to the pediatrician? There is medication that helps this. You might try that. It worked for a good friend of mine.

More Answers

There is a huge underlying emotional issue here that needs to be cleared up in order for this to stop. I recommend calling The Institue of Healing Arts and setting up a phone consultation as soon as possible. It's painless, and trauma free for your little one, and really really works. www.InstituteofHealingArts.info
They are very adept at working with children.

1 mom found this helpful

My daughter is much younger than yours, so while I can sympathize, I don't know if my advice will be helpful or not. We've been slow to potty train too. With my girl I think it's partly a matter of her needing reminding, and partly a matter of her not liking it when I'm the one telling her to do it. She's a very spirited girl.

Anyway, the thing that helped with both issues was setting a timer. I'd set it for every two hours or ninety minutes or whatever. Then she'd have the reminder and it wasn't a battle of wills between us, because it wasn't me telling her to go.

Apparently, I'm not the only one with this idea, because they make potty watches. Here's one on line:

http://www.onestepahead.com/catalog/product.jsp?productId...

Now, that one says "Potty Watch" on it, so she might not want to wear it to school. But maybe you could find something similar somewhere else?

I too have a child the same age that was bed wetting. The doctor sent her to a specialist, they recommended medication. I read the side effects and decided there had to be a better way. I found on the internet the following link: http://www.bedwettingstore.com/

We started the program in January 08 and during the first 12 weeks, she did not use one single pull up. We bought the simple alarm with random sounds and nothing else. I put a sleeping bag right next to my bed, had two sets of sheets and change of pjs right there so when the accidents happened (they do at first) it was not a big deal. I will have to say that it is hard at first, because we were both getting up by an alarm, and she was tired, and somewhat scared by the alarm. The first 4 days she begged me to stop using it, but I remained calm and encouraged her. The alarm comes with a booklet, and on line support. Towards the end of the school year, the bedwetting started again, it might have been the stress of school ending etc. we tried the alarm using the system above; sleeping mat next to me extra clothes, sheets etc, and within 4 days the bedwetting stopped. Throughout the process I discussed with my daughter how stress can impact one's body, so we talked about the ending of school and possible concerns, we also revisited the issue of deep sleep and training the brain to wake up to go to the bathroom etc. If you and your daughter are ready I recommend this alarm. hope this helps.

Hi Jennifer,

I too was a bed-wetter and accidents during the day until early elementary. I know I was dragged to the pediatrician, etc...

Probably like your daughter, I couldn't explain it and I think the pediatrician gave my mom some great advice:

Basically, I think he told her that some kids just have this issue and their bladder may not be as "mature" as other kids my age. He recommended that my mom wake me on each night (I can't remember the exact schedule) but it was probably once or twice so my body got in the habit of waking up... which it did and I started waking up on my own during the night to go to the bathroom.

So this got me thinking, couldn't you use this idea at school, as well? I know I would have accidents from waiting until the last possible second to run to the bathroom...and by that time, it was too late!

So maybe a discussion with her teacher to have her take a bathroom break every few hours. I mean, maybe it could be something as simple as the teacher tapping her on the shoulder as a reminder so she wouldn't be singled out?

Best wishes and good luck!

I have addresseed the same issue with my pediatrician. My daughter is 5 and still wets the bed at night and has an occasional accident during the day. He says it is really only a social concern. He mentioned a medication that makes them produce less urine at night...sounds scary to me. It sounds to me that you are more concerned about the school part. I teach and have had a couple of kids who had to wear pull ups (as high up as third grade!). Have you threatened with that? My daughter just doesn't want to stop what she is doing to go potty - she's afraid she'll miss something. I would remind her that I want a dry day and how proud I'd be and that seemed to work. I bought reusable "pull ups" for night time from one step ahead (online). Don't know if any of that helps but just know I may be in the same boat...we start kindergarten in a few weeks...

also...our nurse has a place to keep a change of clothes for the child...they don't even know until they need them...that would eliminate you having to run up there

I have no idea if this will help at all, but I came across this article on the internet. http://www.emofree.com/Children/dog-phobia-bedwetting-fel...
Have you tried just one session with a professional counselor? It definitely wouldn't hurt and may end up helping. If it was my daughter I wouldn't hesitate and I would actually let her see the therapist alone since you would likely find out more than if you were in the room since she is "telling you what you want to hear". I have a small bladder myself and have always had to get up frequently at night to void. She's probably MAJORLY stressed about this whether she expresses it or not. Wishing you the utmost best at finding a solution.

Have you tried taking her to the pediatrician? There is medication that helps this. You might try that. It worked for a good friend of mine.

Since you must know something about what she is feeling, you should not be blaming her for her incontinence. It could be involuntary bladder contractions or something neurological or cystitis from inadequate emptying, etc. Maybe just a pill could control the problem. Why don't you try a urologist for testing to get to the bottom of this (excuse the pun). If left untreated, you run the risk of some emotional problems or low self esteem; you wouldn't want your child to be ashamed of something she has no control over or to feel she is "different". In a child's case, cystoscopies can be done with sedation. Let the doctor know your concerns about discomfort and just give her lots of support and understanding and reassurance throughout the testing. Since you had the similar problem, you can't think this bedwetting is deliberate. Best of luck to your family.
Linda C. (fellow nurse)

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