Started with Piano but Wants Violin Now

The most IMPORTANT part of playing an instrument is that the person who is playing should enjoy it.

The root of music (or any of the arts) is self-expression. It's communication. Individual communication. So the first ingredient is the LOVE of that communication.

Stop pushing him to play an instrument! And if he chooses to play violin, then let him play violin. If after a month he hates it, let him choose something else.

How do we find out what we love if we don't try new things? There are many instruments in the world. Maybe he will love guitar, or flute. Maybe he will love bass or oboe.

Above all, music is art. And love is the main ingredient.

you = piano

your son = violin

allow him the freedom to explore the beautiful world of music through his own interests. Please do not force him into pursuing your dropped dreams.

Our son chose the baritone....& we had zero connection with it! Totally came out of left field! End result: he's happy, he is one with his instrument....& the Band Director knows he can rely upon our son to be prepared & at the ready. Our son completely found his niche all on his own....& I hope your son has that freedom, too. Peace.

I think you are making this about you, and not him, and worrying about it way too much.

I mean, I understand the love of music. I took piano lessons starting at 7 years old, and then later was in band (clarinet, then saxophone) through high school. I would like to start my daughter on piano when she turns 7 also. But you almost sound like you expect your child to be a professional musician at some point, and to be a concert pianist at that. But this is not about you - it's about him, and what he is interested in, and what he enjoys. He's not asking to quit piano - he's asking to learn violin too. He wants to try something new and that's never a bad thing.

And why does it have to be Suzuki anyhow? Why not just allow him to take violin and piano at the same time? My cousin's son is a music major in college now and can play 7 or 8 different instruments - and never took a Suzuki lesson in his life.

If you love piano so much, you can still take lessons yourself - they do have them for adults too, you know. It's never too late. Then maybe you can accompany your son as he plays his violin.

I'm sorry, JS, but you likely won't like my advice. I'll give it anyway and hope that you will at least consider it.

Your son is too young to take piano. That is one reason he is not interested in it. His little fingers are too small, not strong enough, and he has the focus of a 5 year old - NOT the focus of a child old enough to play the piano. The better age to start piano is at 7 years old.

Just because the teachers are Julliard graduates doesn't mean that your son should be taking piano this young. From your description, he shows NO signs of being a great pianist in the making. It really sounds like you want to turn him into a concert pianist.

Another issue - Suzuki violin and cello are good programs. However, Suzuki piano is NOT. I am a musician and pianist. Suzuki piano teaches rote playing and most of the students can't really read music. Their hand placement on the keyboard usually looks terrible. It's about as bad as the old John Thompson. Yes, that's my opinion. I've worked with many teaching methods. Give a Suzuki piano kid a new piece of music that's relatively easy, and they can't sight read it. That's not a good way to teach piano.

Unless your son shows amazing talent, you need to ratchet YOUR dream down and let him be a kid. If he wants to start violin and you are willing to rent one, fine. But put your dreams of Carnegie Hall aside. If a child doesn't actually want to spend an hour a day practicing, (and btw, my own son with perfect pitch was one of them and I accepted that) they won't become a great instrumentalist. (However, my son sings and that's good enough for me!)

To keep him interested, switch to violin. Re-introduce the piano when he's around 8. If he still doesn't like it, forget about it. Torturing him now as a 5 year old isn't going to make him like it any more when he's 10.

Dawn

I think you are loading way too much of your own experiences on your son. He will have to travel his own journey and learn from his own choices. That said...
It's really not fair to expect a child of this age to 'lock into' one instrument for several years.... they can barely pick out an ice cream flavor to eat for dessert, let alone choose one single thing to commit to for several years.

One thing to consider would be to find other Suzuki parents to talk to, or to find a private violin class which would give him a 'start' and let him try it out without the long-term commitment. Could you do this and keep piano in the mix?

I'll be looking to see other people's answers, but just from reading your post, maybe it would be fun for you to get some refresher lessons and go back to piano?

If you are so passionate about the piano, It may be time for you to try to embrace it and learn it for yourself and not so much to live out your life's fantasies through your kid.

I took years of piano lessons. I was never good, not even mediocre. It wasn't something I was ever really interested in. I actually wanted to learn how to play the conga's. I don't think I would have been good at that either because I have absolutely no rhythm in my hands.

So now I'm in my 40's and really interested in learning how to play the saxophone. I have lots of breathe and love the sound of that particular horn. I'm planning on owning one by Christmas and learning to master it over the next year. It takes 1000 hours of consistency to master anything. I am finally going to make the time to learn.

The things I learned from piano (reading music) will be helpful. I'm actually functionally illiterate at the piano. I can read the music, show you the notes it is played in with the music in front of me but can't actually play it like it's written. I'm alright with it though.

I just think the point in trying music or dance or something else is having that experience and learning about other people and yourself in the process.

Your little one will have many experiences but he needs to be passionate about what he wants to do and then he will practice without any external motivation from you.

Cut him some slack and yourself too. Why not take some time to learn the piano for yourself since you seem passionate about it. Give yourself time and practice. Since you have a piano in your home any way. Don't let it go to waste. Dreams can come true even for us adults. Make your piano playing dream your own reality.

Hi J S. I am a piano teacher and I strongly suggest that if he wants to quit piano and take up the violin, then you should let him.

The violin is a wonderful instrument! Even though you love the piano, I believe you need to support your son in learning the violin.

I have been playing the piano for 26 years. I started when I was 7 and now that I am 33, I am going to take violin lessons. Mabey you could take piano lessons and learn to accompany your son as he plays the violin! :)

I think he's a young boy who wants to try new things. I also thing it's unrealistic to thing long-term when it comes to your son playing a musical instrument. Let him explore and learn. It's supposed to be fun. Once he is older, he will figure out what he wants to play, and what he doesn't.

It's never to late to play music, either. My father is 65 and has been taking piano lessons for the past 10 years. He's quite good. Also, my brother started playing when he was 14 years old, and went on to compete. So, if he decides he wants to do it, he will.

Since you have a piano now, unused, why don't you start taking classes? It could be something you and your son could do together. He will also enjoy his instrument more, and practice with you as well.

I love the piano too. My daughters both started lessons at age 5. My oldest wanted to play violin in 3rd grade so I let her take the lessons her school offered. I was glad when she gave up the violin though.
My girls did not have a choice in learning to play the piano. We had one and I wanted them to play. I did allow my oldest to give up lessons in 8th grade however:)
My oldest started with the Suzuki Method of piano. This was a big mistake IMO. I understand that Suzuki violin is great but not so much for the piano. My youngest daughter started with a more traditional method (She learned to read music from day 1 of lessons). She is almost as good as her older sister although she has only had lessons for 1/2 as long.
I never had any expectations that my daughters would go to Julliard but I did want them to have a life long skill. The problem with Suzuki was that they only play classical music. My daughters are into theatre and also wanted to play show tunes ect. PM me if you want more detail. I have lots of feedback to offer re: Suzuki.
EDIT- If I asked my daughter's if they wanted to learn algebra they would say "no way" but I still make them. I also made them go to religious education which they also did not want to do. I don't think you should leave a decision like this up to a 5 yo.

Don't push your dreams and desires onto your son. He played piano because you bought one and at that age, he had no idea that there were so many instruments to choose from.

Let him play violin if that's what he wants. Like the other poster said, if you like piano so much, take classes yourself and then you can accompany your son on the violin. And don't ask your son to make a decision about when he'll want to change instruments. He's only four - he doesn't yet understand the concept of time.

I think you're asking a 4 year old to make a lifetime decision - he isn't equipped to do that just yet.