Sooo Frusturated Turning Delerious!!!

Hi S.,

I am SO sorry you are going through this. I can only imagine how you feel. When I got pregnant with my son (who is now 19 months old), my husband and I got pregnant on the first try. I am now pregnant with our second, and this time, it took 3 months to conceive. I KNOW 3 months sounds like nothing, but yah, actually, it is! It was killing me that I wasn't getting pregnant right away, especially because I was so successful the first time around. I can only imagine what 6 months feels like! Sure, to someone who isn't trying, 6 months might not seem that long, but when it's you who is constantly being disappointed, that time drags on and on and on..

I have a question for you: have you tried using an ovulation predictor test? That is actually how I got pregnant both times. Some of them can be really expensive, but the ones I used were the CVS brand, for just $17. The package came with 7 tests, and all you have to do is pee on the stick, just like a pregnancy test! (Actually, I never felt comfortable peeing on the stick, so I would pee in a cup and then dip the stick in the cup.) The reason I chose to use the ovulation predictor is because my cycles were never regular. Some months I would get my period after 30 days, sometimes 45 days, sometimes after 60 days! So I knew there was no way I was ovulating on day 14 of my cycle. In fact, I found out that many women don't ovulate around day 14 as many women assume they do. With my son, I ovulated on day 16 (not too far from 14), but with my baby girl, I didn't ovulate until day 21 or 22. So, it's just a suggestion, if you haven't already tried it!

Have you talked to your doctor about this? The previous poster said something about your doctor saying you and your husband are normal, but I couldn't see anything like that in your post...Your doc might be able to help you out by prescribing some sort of medication or something...

Again, I'm sorry you are going through this. I know what it's like when you want nothing more than to be pregnant, and even though you are not, you start over-analyzing each and everything your body does ("Oh, I have to pee a lot, maybe I'm pregnant!" or "My boobs hurt, maybe I'm pregnant!" It really sucks.

All I can say is, until you know/think you are ovulating, try NOT to think about having another baby. Focus on your family and focus on your own personal interests that help make you, YOU. Worrying about it when there is nothing you can do about it (like the approximate 2 weeks from your period until when you might be ovulating) can only bring you more stress/heartache. The people who tell you not to worry about it sound like they are just trying to be supportive because they care about you. I'm sure they don't mean to make your feelings seem invalid. I know you are young, but that doesn't make it any less painful / frustrating for you. Just keep in mind that your youth really is on your side, because if it turns out there is a medical condition that makes it hard for you to get pregnant again, you've got plenty of time to work on the issue. (My mom had me when she was 39 years old! I know that sounds old, but some things are just worth the wait, right?!)

I wish you the best of luck!!

S.-

You HAVE to get the book "Take Charge of Your Fertility". I highly highly reccomend it. I learned soooo much about my body I never realized. It teaches you to pay attention to your body and the signals of ovulation are incredibly obvious! After scoping out some other chat boards on this subject, I realized that everyone was raving about this book. I went to the book store and they said it was "flying off the shelves". We tried for 5 months to get pregnant. The FIRST month after reading that book & watching my body, I was preggers!

Good Luck!
Keep us posted!

Hi S.,
Oh boy do I know how you feel! I am so sorry that you are going through this =(. When we were trying for our last one it took us 9 months to get pregnant. I was so frustrated thinking that there was something wrong. Also my cycle is NOT normal and I kept thinking I was pregnant over and over again. I went through so many disappointments. I felt the same way you do, that I wouldn't feel complete without just one more child. So I prayed that we would be blessed with our last child or that if it wasn't meant to be that I could accept that and move on. I prayed that every day for a couple of months straight. This last pregnancy was the most trying EVER!! I went through a huge miscarriage scare...and then around Christmas time I had to be on bed rest for over 2 months (another scare). Then at delivery time I had to have an emergency c-section!!! I dunno. But on June 13, 2006 we had a beautiful BIG baby boy. Solomon Ace. He was 9lbs. 2oz. and 21in. tall.
Just keep trying and don't give up, ok? I'm sure it will happen when you least expect it to. Good Luck and let me know what happens!! I will be praying for you.
Jennifer

Hi S. --

We also had issues conceiving, so I started tracking my cycles. My issue turned out to be a hormonal imbalance, but by the time the test results were in, I had six months worth of cycles tracked so I could see the "window of opportunity" in my ovulation cycle. I was religious about taking my temp every morning, and disappointed everytime there was a dip, which meant I was about to get my period. But, it also gave me an early indication that I was pregnant. The site I went to and tracked my cycles on was (and is) www.fertilityfriend.com. There's a small fee for the "gold" membership, but totally worth it since you then have access to all the boards (the postings really helped me the most, since nearly every women on that board was going through a similar experience - the frustration of not getting pregnant right away). I highly recommend that website, and wish you good luck in conceiving you next little one. Best wishes!! -T.

I' going through the same thing, but I think we have been trying for about a year now. I stopped taking the birth control patch when it was on the news saying how unsafe it was and i think that was about a year ago now. I always syke myself out every month buy thinking that i am preganat and getting my hopes up but so far I've been let down. I do have one son who is 3 and he was an accident, a wonderful one but an accident. My husband and I are high school sweethearts since the age of 16. We were together for 10 years before our son came along and we never used any protection, now I am afraid that it is going to be another ten years and it is really upsetting. The only thing I can say is maybe the time in your life just isn't right. My husband and I found out we were pregnant the day that we signed papers for our first house together. I guess god new that we were ready to start a family and made it happen. Now if I just new what was standing in our way this time we would be fine. Lots of luck to you and if you want to talk you can email me at ____@____.com

Oh my god, that is sooo weird. You sound JUST like my husband and I. I am 23 and have a 2.5 year old and a 6 week old son. When my daughter was about 20 months we started trying to get pregnant. My daughter wasn't planned so we figured as soon as we started trying it would happen. NOPE! Every single month I would hope and hope but it didn't happen. My period was late for a few months, and when it would come i would cry and think something was wrong with me, because like you, I was soo young, why couldn't i get pregnant. I though something maybe happened during delivery of my daughter and it screwed me up inside. I was a wreck too! Finally after about 9 months of trying, I FINALLY got pregant. Honestly I think the more I stressed and worried the harder it was. Especially around that time of the month waiting to see whether a period started. Just relax, I guess it just takes time. It WILL happen for you. Don't feel bad because you want another one, it just means your a great mom! If you need someone to talk to, message me! GOOD LUCK!!!!!

it seems in my experience that the harder you try, the less likely you are to get prego. with everyone i know when they were calculating ovulation, counting fertile days, looking for physical signs, etc it took forever and it wasn't until they quit obsessing and just had fun being careless without "trying" thats when it happened. myself included. we tried for 9 months, i was charting every detail, elevating my hips after sex, trying everything and then i said 'forget this' because it was so upsetting and the next month it happened. i know its easier said than done, and i'm sure it has to do with stress. don't freak out, it will happen when it's supposed to. you're young and have plenty of time. good luck!!

Even though you've heard it a thousand times...RELAX!!! That is the best thing you can do. Good Luck, and God Bless!

I hate fertility issues with both my son and my daughter. I am only 24 and normally am below average weight, but I have PCOS, polycystic ovarian syndrom, which is usually characterized by excessive hair and being extremely overweight it was why it took me sooo long to get diagnosed. I don't ovulate correctly, and sometimes when I do the egg is already too mature or not old enough. I took clomid and some other drugs to get pregnant both times, but it took longer with my first born then with my second because I bought an electronic ovulation detector and had positive results after two cycles, they are about 200, or at least the one I bought was but it was completely worth it.

I had the same problem when I was trying to conceive my second child. We were going on almost a year with no success. Guess what? We went away for a long weekend (without any children) and just had fun without worrying about conceiving and we got pregnant. Maybe you should take a break and get away for some time. You might be surprised how much stress plays a role in trying to conceive. Both of my chilren were vacation babies and I think that is why. The book Taking Charge of your Fertility is a great book but it also can take the fun and connection out of your relationship when you are so busy worrying about taking your temp, is this peak cycle etc...So my advice, relax go away and have some fun....

First of all I must say that I had a miscarriage a few years ago and I lost twins! My little sister called me last week and told me she is expecting twins! I was so excited for her I was shaking and I called everyone I could think of. Later that night I thought of my loss, but I would never think of putting my loss ahead of her joy. You need to relax and readjust your thinking honey. This is making you bitter, In God's time he will give you the desires of your heart but not til he sees it is the right time. Now I am not perfect and don't think I haven't thought "why her and not me?" I have. But God knows why and now I can find joy in spoiling my nephews! Try praying about it and tell God how you feel and try to be happy not envious of others and see what happens!! I hope this helps and please let me know if you need to talk more, I would love to!

hate to sound like your friend, but if your Dr. stated to you that both you and your husband and ok and you already have a child then it just may be the stress?! this may be hard to do TAKE IT OFF YOUR MIND focus on your child do things that keep you busy. you will be suprise what stress can do to your body!

Hi S.. I know how you feel. My hubby and I have been trying for two years. It is very frustrating every month that goes by and nothing. My husband and I want one more child and I know that I won't be happy until it happens. My son is going to be six this July. Have you talked to your doctor about it? Don't wait two years like I did. Go and let your doc know about it and how it is making you feel. I put it off because I figured I was just overreacting to it. I went and the ob-gyn did an exam and a type of test to check to see that everything with me is functioning ok. They also checked my husband. Now he is going to start me on some meds to help increases my production of eggs. I know this is difficult. I am here if you need someone to talk to anytime.