Son Yells REALLY Loud

L.,

I completely know what you're going through, and posted a similar thread not too long ago. My little guy just turned 2 and is also going through this screaming stage. It's something I can sort of ignore at home, but it's not so easy to ignore in the middle of the library! It's good to remember that there is a purpose to this behavior - your son is trying to tell you something. That doesn't really help to stop the yelling, but if you know what he wants (such as he's trying to reach something or something's not working right) you can give him words to use instead. For example, he can't get a box to close and starts screaming. You say, "Instead of screaming, say, 'Help please, Mommy.'" While your one year old might not say this back, if you say this consistently, he'll start understanding. When there seems to be no point to the yelling, or you can't figure it out and you need it to stop, try to find a consistent signal to use with him. For me, I say, "Shh! You need to use your quiet voice." I try to say this to him in a quiet tone. If it continues, I snap my fingers close to his face, which seems to "snap" him out of it. If he still doesn't stop, you have to remove him from the situation. If you're at home, put him in bed or his room saying, "Screaming boys go back to bed." Sometimes the alone time and quiet room will help him calm down. I've tried time outs (which I do use for other infractions) but he pretty much screams through the whole deal, negating the purpose of the time out. If you're out and about, just take him away and speak to him calmly. These are just a few of the things I've tried. The best thing is to try to be consistent with what you do. Eventually it will catch on. (I hope!)

This is a tough stage, and it's very hard to keep your voice calm while they're screaming incessantly!! Best of luck to you, and know that this too shall pass (hopefully by the time they're 5???) :)

A. K

1 mom found this helpful

My 15 month does this to. I think my child does it because he wants something. He can talk a little, but not enough to say he wants cheese or milk or a cookie. I am now stuck with if I don't give him a cookie he just keeps screeming, but if I do he stopes but then is leaning if you screem you get what you want! I will be interested to see what others say.

It's getting warmer -- so I send outside voices outside! Weirdly enough, voices often get a little calmer outdoors, as kids focus on nature. Your 1-year old should enjoy the nature break, too.

We have a yeller/screamer too. He turned 2 in December. He is baby#3, and has 3 sisters. Anyway, we taught him sign language to help him express himself. We also really try to reward him when he isn't screaming, and not give attention to the times he is screaming. He does still scream, though we continue to intervene and meet his needs before he screams. He also screams when he is excited, happy, frustrated, and mad. I think it is natural for some kids! Good luck!

My 13 month old daughter likes to shriek & she isn't doing it because she has a need or in anger, she just likes the sound of her voice! I just let her enjoy it, she will outgrow it.

My son just turned one and does the skreatching thing but it seems as if he is just learning the differant pitches with his voice it just seems to be when we are trying to watch tv at night. Good luck to it seems to be happening to alot of us.

A.

If it's constant I would get his hearing checked too... but if it's just an attention thing I think you have some REALLY great suggestions already! Good Luck

have you had his hearing checked? even fluid in his ears can be a cause for him to talk too loud!!!

Does he need or want something when he yells? We taught our son (15 months) some basic sign language: food, milk, and toilet. That has helped immensely, because he can make known what he needs/wants.

Sometimes, he does just scream for the sake of screaming--just the sound of his own voice. Sometimes, he screams when he isn't getting his way. In either event, we ignore it. It will stop. My belief is the more attention (positive or negative) you give this type of behavior the more it will increase.

Think about how frustrating it must be to be a toddler--to know what you want or need, but to not be able to express it. Also, he could be just having fun and experimenting with his voice--all completely normal.

My DD was a screamer/yeller also. We did what you're doing, then began to "pop" her mouth with our hand. Try it first on yourself...it doesn't hurt. It's the same thing as if you're trying to make a "popping" sound. You don't hit it hard, just go for the "pop." If you're successful in making that sound on your child, it will REALLY surprise him. That was what we were after...a non-painful surprise factor. It's also kind of stunning to have your face popped. We didn't have to do the 'Pop' more than maybe twice or 3 times before she'd stop. In fact, she would start to scream, look at us (knowing we'd pop her mouth) and quit screaming. Good luck.

My 12 month old yells, screams, and growls at mommy constantly. I just tell him no. He appears to do it in anger or frustration because he has no other way to communicate. Good luck. I am going to keep my eye on this because its frustrating.

Unfortunately, in my experience, the only way to deter this behavior (especially at only 14 months) is to ignore it (very difficult, I know). If he gets ANY type of reaction to the yelling, there is no reason (in his mind) to stop.

Good luck!

A lot of kids go through a yelling stage. I always found that blowing softly in their face will get them to stop and then saying "use your inside voice please". Don't blow in their face if they have already stopped screaming since the reason to do that is to stop the screaming so he can hear you ask him to use the inside voice. You also might make a game out of whispering to give him an alternitive to the yelling. They do grow out of it for the most part.

If he's doing it because he wants something, don't give him what he wants until he is done screaming, if you do you will never break it. Let him scream it out and tell him calmy that he can have what he wants when he is done screaming.

My son will be 3 in 1 month and he went thru a screaming phase also. I think he was just doing it for the extra attention. I would just enforce everytime that we need to use our inside voices, it didn't always work that well when, but now I only need to say it once and he understands. It did work somewhat whe he was 2. I figured its just a phase and he too will outgrow this, and he did (well, he does occasionaaly still scream when we are in the car, very bad timing and he knows it).

I would just keep doing what your doing and it will work out, otherwise talk to your doctor and they may have some helpfull suggestions for you. He is just trying to express himself and he isn't able to get you to understand like he wants to and I also think they are finding their voice and like the sound of it. Good luck and I hope it gets better for you.

Hi! Its hard to reason with a 14 month old & explain to him why yelling is a no-no. I have been there with my son - but it happened later for him. When he turned 2 he'd yell all the time. I tried what I thought was everything until I tried vinegar. I still told Zachary "No yelling please" firmly and told him if he continued to yell that he would get vinegar on his tongue. He continued... So I took a small baby spoon (one of those plastic/disposable learning spoons what is very tiny) and put apple cider vinegar on it & brought it to his mouth. He gladly took it in, as he had no idea what vinegar was. He found out. It was a great deterrent and it does NOT hurt them. If you gave a child a ton of it, it would probably give them a tummy ache but you hardly need any to get the point acrossed. And they can have water afterward too, of course. Zachary is 30 months old now yelling isn't an issue for us, but recently he has started saying "Oh my God" and we don't want him to, which he thought was funny. So out came the vinegar again, and Zachary has stopped saying OMG too. You can even threaten it in a store - not just at home. But be prepared to either carry vinegar with you or purchase some there, as you need to be consistent & follow through with any "threats." I use time outs for other bad behavior, but I use vinegar for the ones for his mouth. It works wonders. Of course your son in younger, so if you decide to try it, just put a tiny amount on his tongue, enough to taste it & see how it goes. Good luck!

Paitence. I have a daycare and I have a 15 month old who is going through the same stage. Mostly, I try to ignore it, but I am also working with him on some baby sign. Just keep trying.