Son's Haircut???

I let my sister get my son's hair done once when he was about 10 or 11. He never asked for it again. It was the summer, school was out, it was just a phase, it's a thing that was a different thing to do. He's 18 now & has never wanted it done again. I've had bigger battles getting him to keep his hair cut like I want. We make deals. You keep your hair the way I want it & you can do this or that type of deal. In the end, he's your child & it's your decision. You never know how they will be. Best of luck:)

I would let him have the haircut and pay for it, but I would insist that if he wanted the hair color, he would have to pay for it and it would have to be temporary color only.

My sil is a hair dresser and told me once that she had a woman come in with a 5 yr old to have her hair died (that's a whole nuther story). Any way, she refused to do it and said that it would be unethical for her to. The dies are tested on 100+ lb adults when they test for toxicity, not little kids. There's no telling what sort of reaction a small child might have. There's probably a less toxic product out there that you might be able to use, but using real hair dye with all those chemicals would not be a good idea. You might try something like food coloring or one of those rinse out hair colors. Just an idea.

I teach middle school and a lot of our kids have their hair dyed black (even the 6th graders). I am kinds a liberal mom, but I would saw go ahead with the faux hawk and use a temporary dye for the color. You can get this at the grocery store.
BTW congrats on working towards becoming a teacher, it is the best job out there!

I'd let him do the faux hawk and would consider a temp. color, not permanent.

I think a fun hair cut for the summer is fine. But I'd be careful of starting color and high lights. On one hand, it's just hair. But on the other hand it is a slippery slope. My oldest son had asked for this and I said no. Summer mohawk that grows our before school starts, OK, coloring no. He lived with that compromise. And he now has completely normal mainstream hair. We saved the money...and the what's-next.

Personally, I would give him a choice. I would tell him that you will be happy to pay for his haircut, but if he wants to get it colored, then he'll have to pay for it with his own money.

If he can pay for it, let him. Then maybe he'll decide it isn't worth it next time, and he gets to learn that lesson through experience, which is always a valuable thing. That takes the pressure off you, and allowing him to make the decision helps him learn to make great choices.

Good luck!

P.S. Oh, and the black dye wouldn't be permanent. Even if it stuck around for longer than expected, his hair will still grow out of his head blond. My haircut mantra: It WILL grow back. =)

For me, 10 is too young for a color. Maybe you could compromise with some colored spray, or a temp color you can get at the store, but I would NOT allow a full die job at a salon.

I would see about a temporary wash-in color as others have suggested. With your daughter not much younger than your son, she may feel she has a right to get her hair dyed at only 10 years old. Just buzzing off an odd haircut or color before school wouldn't be a good option for a girl.

I personally believe that he is way to young to get his hair colored. Also if he has light hair and dies it a dark color it will never be back to normal again he will have to continue to color it forever. My opinion is that when he is older and can pay for it himself then he can get it done if he still wants to. I would just go with your gut if you are not comfortable with it 100% dont let him do it you are the mom.

What a great question. I suppose your son is at the age now where he wants to be like his "idols" (i.e.-Adam Lambert?) I think self-discovery should not be discouraged, but as a parent you can take some reasonable precautions - like using a dye that is not very permanent? (I'm a guy, I don't know about these technical things). If you resist, the child will just want it more. I say let him do it - it seems harmless, and he may not like it after all.

I have a 12 yr old who started wanting to experiment with his hair at 10. I allowed him to get a faux hawk, and I like it as much as he does. We do not allow him to dye it mainly because he already has dark brown hair. He would like to go blonde!

We have had to talk to him about how people perceive him. For the first time last week he got "the look" and he didn't understand. So we had a talk about how judgmental people can be. He is a great kid, but because of his hair he is perceived as a trouble maker.

If he wants a little color, he can use colored gel in his faux hawk!

that seems way too young for a child to get his hair dyed. I wouldn't be against something VERY temporary, but you're taking a BIG chance with that sandy blonde hair.

and I wouldn't dream of taking my 10 year old to a salon. that seems like a huge waste of money to me. There are probably much better things to spend that money on. JMO.

Why don't you try the do it yourself method. There are several that gradually washes out over a month or so. This way he could dye it and as it gradually comes out you don't see any roots. This way he gets his wish and maybe since there are no roots showing, it will be enough to satisfy his current fashion statement. He's getting to the age where you have to pick and choose your arguments, and since it's summer break this might be one to let ride. Good luck!

I don't understand why some folks are freaking out. You have given no indication that this is a character issue. It sounds like he's at the age where he wants to look tough and is trying to experiment with his image.

His hair will grow back whether you use permanent or temporary hair dye. Provided you aren't having other character issues or new, scary friends, this is a "no big deal" category. I think it's a good thing that he isn't sneaking around to get this done.

Do the haircut since you are comfortable with that and have him pay for the hair color or have him do semi-permanent at home. You are the Mom and can set boundaries here. It's ok if he is a making a big hair mistake. It's summer... and he is handing you an opportunity to allow him to practice making decisions and dealing with the results of his decision.

Also this is a good time to prep him with the "how you look affects how people treat you" talk- unless you prefer him to pick that up on his own. He may get funny looks or be followed around stores as if he is a troublemaker.

If your daughter decides to press you soon- since big brother is pushing it, have clear modesty boundaries. For instance, I don't let my daughter show her tummy in swimsuits or clothing. Are you OK with ear piercing? (I'm Latina so we pierce while infant) She can chose the colors and styles as long as it meets our modesty guideline. My daughter is very bohemian chic, but that's what she likes and she's covered. With boundaries, these are safe areas to allow kids to practice decisionmaking and exert their independence.

My 10 yr old son just dyed his hair. We were "conservative" but it is dyed. He also wanted the hair cut, which my husband was against. The dying was the compromise. My son is happy w/the change and we are happy w/the cut. Hope that helps!

I don't remember how old my daughter was when she wanted to dye her hair burgandy - and it wasn't during the summer. I thought about it and let her do it. I decided it is best to 'pick your battles' and this one seemed so minor. My mom almost had a coronary - but I told her that there were bigger things to worry about than what color her hair was. Thinking about it, she was probably in the 7th grade at the time. My point is - you have to consider where your comfort level is and maybe ask him why he wants to do this - see if you can determine if there's any underlying reasons or if this is just something he wants to do because maybe other kids he knows are doing it (which is a lot of what motivates tweens & preteens, along with teenagers). Keep the lines of communication open and especially if you decide to not let him color his hair - explain to him why without sounding too preachy or I'm the adult, that's why kind of attitude. Good luck!

We did my sons hair electric blue the last day of school in the first grade. It was great. It was a semi permanent, but because he was toe head blond it took much longer than three weeks to wash out.

I woud let him do it if and use a temporary dye.
You could also get colored gels for him to use instead, although the reds and blacks may seep into the hair strands, at the end of summer you can just buzz it off.

Wow, it seems so young. Is this considered a fad right now? Maybe you could set the rules in advance before you go to the salon so that there are no surprises. For example, that you will have a say in the color of his hair, only for the summer, etc. And that he has to pay for the color. He could do chores for money and save to do this since this is something that is not a necessity. Good luck!

i am with the meet him in the middle camp. a haircut that you can remedy come fall is one thing. a hair color is another story. as someone who is addicted to dying her hair just to avoid grey hair, i'd say don't start him on it now at such an early age! the dyes are meant for adult hair and might really damage his hair, even the temporary stuff.

Having the same discussion with my 11 year old. Last summer all of his friends were getting high lites and he wanted them too. I bought the kit and he chickened out. Luckily he has dark hair so he has not asked to dye it. There are several ways to look at it, it is only hair and will grow. Be glad he doesn't want a tattoo or piercing. I would agree to dark brown and be thankful he did not want blue. Good luck, we will be doing the hawk too, you are not alone.

When my sons were young now 25 and 20 they wanted their hair bleached blond... It was the thing back then and all kids were doing it. I look back at their pictures now and think oh my gosh what was wrong with me. They aloved it though. It was summer then too and they had short haircuts so it didn't last long each time. Don't they make a rinse that will last only several washings 8-10 or something like that, so if it is not what you all like it will not last long ? Good luck.

I don't mean to be offensive but I don't understand why you would consider dying your 10 year olds hair, temporary or not. I just don't get it. I would reluctantly say yes to the mohawk even though I think they look ridiculous but absolutely not to dyeing his hair. Are you trying to avoid a confrontation and that's why you aren't "totally against it"?