Son Needs to Gain More Weight but He Is a Picky Eater. HELP!

I know a LOT of families, in which their son is smaller/skinnier/shorter than their other girl sibling.
"Size" has nothing to do with gender.

If your Pediatrician is not worried, I would not worry.

My son is picky with eating too. But he grows like a weed, is very healthy, and is tall and lanky. He eats, per his body's cues for hunger or fullness. That is healthy and appropriate. Not eating for emotional reasons or issues.

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Your pediatrician knows best so if he's not worried, I wouldn't be worried either. If you still would like some more meat on his bones just for your peace of mind, give him HEALTHY high-calories items such as whole milk, whole yogurt, avocado (loads of good fats), olive oil, sesame oil, etc. Make sure not to feed him junk food b/c then you're just gonna clog his little arteries. and please don't force him to eat or give him ultimatums. If your little guy is already picky about food, you don't want him to associate negative emotions with eating which will make him eat even less or have food issues down the road. Bottom line, offer him high quality nutritious foods and as long as he's in a healthy weight range and dr isn't concerned, relax!

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I don't agree that it's always as simple as "your son is picky because you allow it". Some children have sensory issues that make some textures unbearable. My son would actually throw up trying to eat some foods. It can be really difficult to be the parent of a child that is extremely picky (and difficult to be a child like that too). People don't understand unless they've been there, and it's hard when people just tell you it's your fault.

I don't know whether your son's food issue is sensory or not, but here is some information that might help:

http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/picky-eaters.html

Other than that I highly recommend taking him to see a nutritionist. We did that with our underweight picky-eater son, and it was really helpful. She was very good at coming up with some calorie-dense foods that he liked. One that was especially helpful was Power Bars. He especially likes the Triple Threat- Caramel Peanut Fusion. They are 230 calories, 10g of protein, and 3g of fiber. This is what I'm referring to:

http://www.powerbarstore.com/products/bars/powerbar_tripl...

There are several other brands- just compare labels for calories/ protein.
I liked some of the Odwalla bars, but my son didn't. The Triple Threat were the only ones he'd eat.

My other son, really likes the Clif Bar- Chocolate Brownie
http://www.clifbar.com/food/products_clif_bar/

She also recommended Yoplait Custard Style yogurt- he found it too thick, but he liked the traditional Yoplait which was only something like 10 calories less.

Good luck!! =o)

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You need to leave your daughter out of the equation regarding your son's proper weight. If your pediatrician isn't worried then try to relax. I have four kids and my daughter was the only one that reached the 4yr/40lb mark. The boys were all skinny (used to tease that we'd have to tether them down on a windy day). Go figure. Look at genetics, my dad was a skinny guy as was my brother so I know my sons got their genes from that end of the gene pool while my daughter got her "womanly" curves from my husband's side. If he is getting proper nutrition and growing he's doing well!

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My brother and I were (and still are) extremely skinny as kids. We were not picky at all though so that is a difference. My mom made everything with butter, haha. She laid on the calories and for a while gave us both malted milk shakes daily (very high calories). My brother went through a phase (around age 11) where he drank high calorie shakes from a work-out store. None of these things make us gain any more weight. We just stayed skinny. Luckily I know how to eat healthy now, but boy I do love butter still :) Anyway, I am not sure how to get a picky kid to eat more bc my son is extremely picky. I will make him things he likes anytime if he will eat it. He just discovered he loves homemade bisquits with butter so I have been making these a lot lately. My aunt made a deal with him that if he can find two new foods he likes by the end of the month she will pay him $15. To him this is a ton of money and he is VERY motivated by money. I don't want to bribe my kid to try foods, but my aunt's idea was brilliant! He has tried SO many new foods...he wanted to try zucchini (this is a kid who eats 3 veggies total), green peppers, casseroles (he hates food mixed together), etc. So far he has hated almost everything he has tried but he did find two new foods! Eggrolls (wow, he ate veggies! I could not believe it) at a local restaurant, and chinese noodles (kind of ramen style). These foods are not super healthy or anything but I am SO excited that he has wanted to try things. My aunt is now giving him a new challenge. Anyway, back to when I was a child...the ONLY thing that made me stop being so so skinny was for me to work out and do sports. That gave me some muscle and I stopped looking so freakishly thin. In college I started doing long distance cycling and took weight classes. I finally looked more "normal" for the first time. I wish I had done sports as a young child, but I never did.

My 2 youngest kids are skinny. One is only 5% on the weight table. My son is not even on it.

My kids are not picky eaters though. I offer a lot of dense calories foods for them to eat.

Breakfast always has bacon, sausage or eggs with ham and cheese, with whole grain breads or cereals or pancakes.
I make steaks, mashed potatoes with sour cream and butter, Caesar salad. They love Korean meats, like kalbi and bulgogi.
Lunches are pastas: Mac & Cheese, raviolis, bread and butter, salami, fresh fruit, chocolate chip cookies....

We eat a lot of fresh fruit and veggies.

If your kids are active, doing well academically, sleeping well, I do not recommend making them 'finishing their plates.' My parents made us do that and I hated it. Some foods are just gross to me b/c of that approach.

Some people's metabolisms are just higher and they burn through it faster. Also, is there anyone on either side of your families that are built thin and wiry?

Your son is picky because you allow it. You need to make him eat. Keep offering foods and tell him he must eat a little or he can't go play ect. One or two bites and he will eventually learn to like the foods. Mac & cheese will help to fill him up and out. Milk shakes will help too.

My 2 oldest were picky eaters, learned from their dad. After we divorced I made them eat what I put in front of them. A couple of nights they almost fell asleep at the table because they didn't want what I had made. But this mean Mom made them and today they eat almost anything. Summer is a great time to start this, you don't need to worry about him getting enough sleep for the school the next day.

My youngest is a skinny kid, he's 20 and wears a 30-32 size jeans, and he's about 6' 2" . This kid eats everything and anything and in large quanties. Some people are just skinny--lucky them.

One more thought muscle weighs more than fat. How muscular is he? Does he get enough exercise? You may find that if he spends more time outside playing and getting some exercise and building some muscle he will weigh more.

One of my sons is very skinny. When he was around he got to the point where he hardly wanted to eat, so I started buying Boost for him in order to "boost" his appetite. It worked, and now he has a very healthy appetite. But, at 21, he's still terribly skinny, and he eats well now. He just burns it all off. I've had problems off and on too with being underweight so I guess genes play a role.

One more thing. You can't force a picky eater to try anything. I'm a picky eater so I know. Just give him options. Actually, the more you try to force him, the more he'll resist, I think.

Read "How to get your child to eat (but not too much)" for useful ideas and a reality check.

Does your son like smoothies? I add higher amounts of good fats to smoothies by adding avocados. The avocados won't alter the flavor if you're using other strongly flavored fruits like strawberries and bananas and will add some good fats. DS even likes just avocado smoothies (just milk- you can use whole milk- avocados, and a little bit of sugar).

I wouldn't go to high calorie shakes from the grocery store. They are full of emulsifiers which are hard to digest and sugars which are empty calories. I would go to a comprehensive and proven full spectrum supplement that is highly absorbable, is used world-wide and approved by physicians in feeding stations working even with very compromised kids. It was developed by the renowned food scientist who helped develop ProSoBee and Enfamil formulas. This is a product designed for children, no junk in it, no drugs, and manufactured in the US under near-pharmaceutical grade conditions. It comes with a money-back guarantee and free consultation. If you want more info, let me know. But stay away from the pre-packaged shakes from the stores, even the health food stores.

I was underweight and had to see an endocrinologist. I had serious food aversions, *extremely picky* eater,and as an 11 yr old, i had the bone scan of an 8 year old.

My Dr. told me if i didn't eat, I would be fed through an iv weekly. That helped me decide to eat, but i still struggled. One thing that was suggested, was the Carnation cereal bars and shakes. They come in powders and are pretty much like a chocolate milk shake. I still hated them, but choked them down. Also, be sure that he isn't getting full on things like milk and drinks during the day. All I ever did was snack on bread and milk, so I wasn't starving at meal times and could be more picky. Make sure the food options you give him are healthy and full of protein and carbs for absorption. And, make sure he's taking a multi-vitamin daily.

What does he like to eat? Feed him those things. If he likes ice cream he can have one every day. He might be in a growth spurt and crave foods that help him to grow. If he doesn't like sugar or milk you will have to learn to cook things that do not contain those ingredients. Does he like meat. Beef and lamb can help him to gain weight. So can fatty fishes like Salmon and Tuna.

One of my grandsons wouldn't eat vegetables. Then he agreed to eat just four he liked and so that's what we gave him until his tastes widened. He also would eat granola for breakfast and dinner unless we had a dinner he liked.

Everyone is different. I have a super skinny 12 year old. You should see her in a bathing suit, she looks like she has an eating disorder as she's very tall so she looks like an older teen w/no boobs, bones showing etc. She's always been thin, her Dad and I were the same as kids. I hated it as a teenager, flat chested, skinny legs but you wouldn't see me complaining about my body after about 20 years old! We all have different body types and sometimes the kids who are most ackward at a younger age turn out to be the most beautiful later on, just ask any super model what she looked like as a tween, usually not conventionally pretty. Unless there is a medical problem try not to worry, he'll fill out as he matures.