N. asks from Addison, IL on April 28, 2008
Social Outings
Any suggestions from other single working mothers out there on how to get back into the dating scene and meet friends. I'm 30 and it seems that like most people the friends I grew up with in highschool didn't turn out to be true friends (they are mutual friends of both myself and my daughters estranged father) so I found it easier to cut them out altogether to avoid the backstabbing that was taking place. I dont want to pay for a friend finder service either it seems to desperate. Going out with coworkers seems to be out of the question now too because the last couple outings have been pretty out there for me, am I just getting to old, to stuffy, lost touch but I just dont enjoy seeing a 19 yr old coworker out at the bar acting 12 tripping all over herself and hitting on men in their sixties for drinks, or other coworkers in their late thirties getting out of control punching their female spouses, drunks at the owners home throwing each other clothed into pools, then stripping down and swimming around half naked in front of coworkers and the owner until 6am. I know I can meet people thru coworkers but how much childish behavior do I stomach in the process. I know there was a time when I acted like this, when I was one of the last people still standing at 6am but it seems that having a child has matured me, and I feel lost as if I moved to another state since cutting ties with my so called friends. Any suggestions?
More Answers
B. answers from Chicago on April 28, 2008
I agree with Michelle- I also had a friend who met another divorcee on eharmony and they are very happy. She also felt the site was excellent at screening potential dates
Beth
B.A. answers from Chicago on April 29, 2008
I met my (now) husband on yahoo.com personals and I recommend online dating. I was highly selective about who I responded to in the first place, and I always got the man's name and basic information before we went out, and would even do background checks with the court system, etc, before dating anyone. On your first date, you can keep it very light and brief, like meeting for mid-day coffee.
As for meeting friends, you could try taking a class from your local community college in something you really enjoy doing, like cooking, or a foreign language, or something fun like that. You could meet men there, too! Good luck!
A.K. answers from Chicago on April 28, 2008
try meetup.com and join groups that you like and possibly will find someone with similar likes to you. There are over 100 in the Chicagoland area and it is free.
M.O. answers from Chicago on April 28, 2008
I have had several friends use eharmony and meet their perfect matches. I am actually standing up in a wedding in May for an eharmony match.
D.N. answers from Chicago on April 28, 2008
Hi--What about joining a health club or maybe a park district event. You will be surprised as to how and when you find someone that will spark your interest. I would be leary of the online dating, a friend of mine has done it and the stories that she has told me are pretty out there. A church outing is a good idea, you can see if there is a group of singles like yourself. Best of luck to you!
A.L. answers from Chicago on July 14, 2008
Hey N., I have a hard time meeting new people as well. I'm married to a great man, but he works tons of hours and we aren't from this area. So, I started a yahoo moms group and have met some nice ladies who are similar to me. If you are interested in joining, you may at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/WillCountyMoms/
Thanks!
N.P. answers from Chicago on April 28, 2008
I am not a very religious person but if you are or maybe even not, maybe finding a local church and becoming involved through them? Also, many of my friends have had a lot of great luck (few even found their spouses) through online dating (eharmony, match) etc. Meetup.com might be a good way to meet some people in your same situation as well. Good luck.
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