Sleeping Through the Night - McKinney, TX

Updated on March 30, 2007
T.W. asks from McKinney, TX
29 answers

I am trying to find ways to get my son to sleep through the night, in his own crib. When we try to put him down for the night and turn out the lights, he cries and cries. He could be asleep in our arms, but as soon as we put him down, he starts to cry and does not stop. The other night he cried for 30 mins. straight and this was after his last feeding and diaper change. In the end, we put him in the bassinet and he slept for about 4 1/2 hours. Any suggestions to getting him to sleep in his crib and through the night would be greatly appreciated.

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S.W.

answers from Dallas on

I agree- Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. I read BabyWise and didn't like it (very judgmental of non-breastfeeding moms) and everything is based on feeding schedules. My son has been sleeping through the night since 2 months (he will be 3 months this weekend). This book was a lifesaver!

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E.

answers from Dallas on

You should DEFINITELY buy the book Healthy Sleep, Happy Child. It was such a lifesaver for us. We've used the book for both children (2 and under) and the both nap and sleep like a dream!

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B.M.

answers from Dallas on

Amen on the swaddling! Even if you don't have a "swaddler" blanket, use a regular receiving blanket and wrap him up tight. Babies like to be cuddled. If it helps, start trying to lay him down and just softly rub his eyebrows until he falls asleep. He might cry a little, but it seemed to work for us. I had the same problems with my twins and they now sleep 8pm-8am. There is hope! It might take a while, but just think, when he gets older, you will get plenty of sleep!

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K.W.

answers from Dallas on

Infants don't do change well, and space is not reassuring to them as it is to us because they are not neurologically prepared to deal with it. Swaddling, tightly with the arms to the side, helps them to relax in the snug boundaries they are used to and prevent the reflexes that startle them awake hourly otherwise. There are many blankets on the market that are large enough to help you and swaddlers the work as well. We carry a few in The Nestingplace. Not matter where you get them go to the Happiest Baby on the Block website and read Dr Karps explanation of why we have to start with the swaddle to soothe a baby and help them sleep.

Good Luck to you,
K. @ The Nestingplace

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N.J.

answers from Dallas on

Miracle Blanket from Burdick Baby. I swaddled until my daughter was 6 months old. She still loves to be tucked in tight at 2 years old.

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A.L.

answers from Dallas on

This is what I did with both of my kiddos to transition them from bassinet to crib. Start at nap times. The first couple of days at nap time I would leave them in the bassinet, but put the bassinet in their room. After a couple of days of doing that, put you son down for naps in his crib. He may be fussy at first, but in a couple of days, he'll nap in his crib. At this point, start putting him down for the night in his crib. Again, he may fuss a bit about it but it shouldn't be as bad as before because he's gotten use to the crib.

Also, you might try a night lite or small lamp in his room so it's not quite as dark. If he is use to a lot of noise when he sleeps in the bassinet, it may also help to put a radio or white noise machine in his room. You can always taper off the voulme until it is off, if you don't want him sleeping with music (which could turn into an issue when you travel) at all.

Good Luck!!

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M.K.

answers from Dallas on

I think that it is fine for your little boy to still sleep in his bassinet. My little girl slept in her bassinet until almost 6 months and now she does just fine in her crib.

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A.J.

answers from Dallas on

Well in my very honest opinion there is really not a whole heck of a lot you can do at just 3 months old... I have a 3 year old and a 5 month old, and my 5 month old just began sleeping through the night 2 nights ago. (8:30pm-9:00am no waking)
I am sure I just got lucky! Most kids do wake up at night at least once a week, even the older ones. My daughter will come get in bed with us at least once a week, I count this as "waking up"
With newborns,my pedi told me that the reason they wake at night is beause they are hungry and once they get to a point where their stomach is more mature and can hold a little more and doesn't wake them up telling them they are starving.
My ds seemed to start sleeping through the night once he started solids.
Good luck, its a tough road being a new mom!
A.

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J.R.

answers from Dallas on

3 months is a little young to expect that he might sleep through the night. At 3 months mine were sleeping anywhere from 6-8 hour stretches and you will find out that even as they get older you will still have sleepless nights (sick, teething, growth spurts etc). Maybe start getting him used to his crib with naps during the day and then move him the crib at night after he is sleeping well in it for his naps. Also keep in mind that when you lay him down the first 3-4 days it is not unusual for them to cry as long as an hour or longer before they fall asleep. As heartbreaking as it is (my husband had to do it with my 2 because I couldn't stand to not pick them up) learning to comfort themselves is a big developmental milestone. Best of luck.

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J.B.

answers from Dallas on

I would read "Baby Wise". It took us about 2 nights to get our 6 month old to start sleeping in his own crib and sleeping through the night.
J. B

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P.J.

answers from Dallas on

T.,

We did the same thing, and ran into the same problem. Babies wake up several times through the night just as adults do. However, we roll over and go right back to sleep because we are aware of our surroundings and usually never realize we awoke in the first place. Because you are allowing your infant to fall asleep on your chest and then placing him in his crib, when he wakes up or is arroused at his next sleep interval, he is not sure where he is and wants to go 'back to mamma' if you will. We let our daughter fall asleep on us for almost a year and would then move her to her crib(it was worth it, but I was exhausted sometimes), but she was getting too big and waking up between 3:00 & 5:00 am every day. We couldn't take it anymore. You are doing the right thing...put him to bed while awake, so he will start to acclamate to his surroundings. The hard part is to let him cry it out until he finally falls asleep. It could take two days or two weeks, but he will finally realize that this is where he sleeps and it won't be as big of a struggle...& it is worth it in the end. They sleep better and usually longer. Good luck!

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T.T.

answers from Dallas on

There might be a couple of reasons he doesn't like the crib. It may feel too open for him or is it under an air vent? My 2nd son HATED the air blowing on him and it would wake him up every time.

He's still young, so give him a little time and try again. My 2nd son was 4-5 months before he would sleep in his crib for any length of time. Remember, in the whole scheme of things another week or even month will not make a difference. They are only that little once and he's too young to spoil.

My son is 2 1/2 now and easy to get down and is a great sleeper and has always been easy.

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J.C.

answers from Dallas on

I have a 2 month old. I follow the baby whisperer - Tracy Hogg's books. She does NOT advocate letting them cry it out and I agree. My baby has been in her crib now for a few weeks and is almost sleeping through the night. She goes to bed at 8:30, but I feed her again around 10 - without waking her. She gets one half of a feeding around 3-4 am, the rest of the time if she wakes up I put her back to sleep. She gets up for good around 8am. Soon I will phase out the last small night feeding.

Also, I wouldn't worry if he sleeps better in his bassinet. Is the problem that you want him out of your room? Try puttinghim to sleep in the bassinet but in his room. Then you can gradually transition him to his crib.

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S.K.

answers from Dallas on

easier said than done but you should probrably let him fall asleep in his crib. meaning, try not to let him fall asleep in your arms. also, you could lay beside the crib & move closer to the door each night. until you are out of the room entirely. i know some babies do cry for what seems like forever. but, the longer you wait the harder it will become.good luck

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M.G.

answers from Dallas on

Hi T.,
I went thru the same story, unfortunately, it got MUCH worse. He would get 3-4 hours straight then start waking up every hour to hour & a half,til 6am, not hungry or uncomfortable, just waking & crying. I'm one of those moms that cant let her child just sit in his crib & cry all night long til they eventually fall asleep, my heart & stomach cant take it. After 2 weeks of this, I physically couldnt handle it anymore. When I called the ped dr, he said, it had become habit for my son & I had to help him break it. I was afraid of his suggestion, "you're gonna have to let him cry it out". I was horrified. But he said to MODIFY it. Lay him down, groggy, NOT asleep, then when he cries, wait 5 min, go in soothe him w/o picking him up or giving him a pacifier, just talk & pat his back or belly ONLY STAYING FOR 30 SECONDS & WALK OUT(even if he's still crying!! Then wait 10min, go in-30sec, wait 15min-30sec, wait 20min etc, etc, etc.
I thought my dr was CRAZY! I just KNEW it wouldnt work with Neil. But much to my surprise, the 1st night, he cried for about 30-35 total, the 2nd night-20min, the 3rd night-11 hours straight hours of sleep! I was so shocked! Now, its still a work in progress, but he usually falls asleep after I first put down after less than 5 min, and if he wakes in the middle of the night he barely cries for a min or 2.
Hope this helps!

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J.S.

answers from Dallas on

I know it can be frustrating, I went through the same thing with my son. Have you tried elevating the head of the mattress just a litle bit? Have you tried using a sleep positioner and laying him slightly on his side? That seemed to help my son. Has he had issues with gas? Do you have some sort of a noise maker in his room? It might just be to quiet.

We tried for weeks to get our son in his own bed, he would sleep great in his boucer chair but not anywhere else. Finally we got him in his bassinet, and then finally in his bed. He loved to be swaddled so we did that for a while. Finally we tried the sleep positioner and laying him slightly on his side. He didn't sleep through the night until he was 5 months old and on cereal and veggies.

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T.L.

answers from Dallas on

Yep, I was going to say to try swaddling him. My daughter HAD to be swaddled everynight and she loved it. They feel more secure that way. She would not sleep in her bassinet for ANYTHING and when she was three months old, we moved her to her crib and the first night in there she slept for 5 hours!! It was great and all because she was swaddled!!! Also, does he have something to look at?? I swear by the Fisher Price Ocean Wonders Aquarium. I should have owned stock in Energizer for all the D batteries I kept in my house for that thing!! My DD LOVED it. We would turn it on for her every night and it would lull her to sleep within 10 minutes. When she figured it out, she would turn it on by herself. It's funny because I would hear the song going off in the middle of the night and know that she had woken up for a bit, but she would never fully wake up. It would help her go back to sleep. She's 4 now and she still remembers it. Just a suggestion! I would also advise always putting him to sleep while he's awake so he can learn to put himself to sleep. It's a hard habit to break if you only let them fall asleep in your arms. My two cents! Good luck.

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H.D.

answers from Dallas on

I think it is a bit early to expect him to sleep through the night BUT my advice to you is to let him cry it out. I am a first time mom too. My son is 11 mo. He did the same thing. We could rock him to sleep but as soon as we put him in his bed he'd cry. So at 4 mo. we started the Ferber method. I'm sure you can research it online.

The jist of it is to try to teach them to self soothe and get use to their surroundings. This way they don't have to rely on you so much. After the initial hell of this, it was the best thing we ever did. He started sleeping through the night and napping better. After a few weeks when we would put him to bed he'd just roll over and go to sleep. The most important thing is to make sure you put them to bed awake. That way if they wake in the night they are right in the spot they were before and it doesn't startle them.

It's really hard to listen to your baby cry. The first couple nights we sat on the driveway with a beer so we couldn't hear him. The longest he cried was for an hour straight and then it got shorter from there. My friend had her baby the same time as me and always told me how mean I was for doing this but now she tells me she wish she would have done it too. Now that her son is older and she's trying to implement it it takes longer. Her son cried 3 hours the other night. Best to start young.

Basically, you put them to bed awake. Go in their room 5 min. later just so they know you are still there. Then wait 10 min. Then 15 min and so on. Lengthen the space of your visits 5 more minutes each time you go in. Don't pick them up just pat them and talk to them for a few seconds. Consistency is very important with this. If you have a babysitter, teach her. Try to also do it for naps.

Hope this helps and good luck. This may not be for you but it's something different.

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L.S.

answers from Dallas on

I agree that 3 months is entirely too young to expect a child to "sleep through the night". Most do not do so until much older. The fact that he sleeps 4 1/2 hours is great in my opinion. Mine never slept more than 2 hrs straight before the age of 1 so I think you're very lucky. If it were me, I'd keep doing what works -- the bassinet. I would not recommend Babywise (see www.babywise.info for more info), but found Elizabeth Pantley's book No Cry Sleep Solution very helpful. Good luck!

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S.N.

answers from Dallas on

T.,

Honestly, I think 3 months is a bit early to expect your son to sleep through the night. His tiny tummy still needs to be fed often. Having sais that, here are a couple of books I would recommend: "The Baby Sleep Book" by Dr. Sears and "The No-Cry Sleep Solution" 'by Elizabeth Pantley. I only recommend these because I am against letting my baby cry-it-out alone. These books are also good about exlpaining baby's sleep cycles and comparing them to that of adults. Good luck. This too shall pass.

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T.G.

answers from Dallas on

Hi! I'm sure you are doing a great job! It can be frustrating at times though. The thing about babies is that they can't be reasoned with (LOL) and they aren't logical. I got lots of help from books. It's important to find the few books that you agree with though.

I got my son to sleep through the night (9pm to 7:45am) at 11 weeks old by using techniques in the book called On Becoming Babywise. The main idea is that you never let the baby fall asleep while feeding, that way he won't use it as a device to fall asleep. There is a pattern to follow during the day - feedtime, then waketime/playtime, then sleeptime, then back to feeding again when it's time. During any middle-of-the-night feedings (which should be dropped by the time he is 3 months old) you feed and then put him right back down. A three month old gets enough food during the day (if his eating habits are healthy) to not need a feeding at night. The routine of getting a feeding at night might be why he wakes up - he might not necessarily be hungry.

I completely stopped giving any bottle or water or anything through the night after my son slept through at 11 weeks, and my doctor agreed. At about 16 weeks old I had to start letting my son cry it out - once for almost an hour, but after 2 nights and then 2 more nights 4 days later, he finally went back to sleeping through the night. Teething is when they wake up during the night a lot, so I always listen to his cry, if it's whiney and not very loud, I know he will get himself back to sleep so I quietly peek in to check on him, but don't go in unless it lasts more than 30 mins. If his cry is harder and persistantly loud, I check him, see if there is lots of drool, and consider giving him some pain relief (Tylenol) for his teething.

Another good thing is something called Gripe Water (I bought it online). It tastes like black liquorice, and giving him a little of that from the dropper soothes his tummy or helps hiccups or gas.

Another very important thing is to have a routine before bed that doesn't change much. That way he knows what to expect, and he finds comfort in that.

Good luck!

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V.S.

answers from Dallas on

My son, who is 3 now, did the same thing when he was a baby. I remember going insane because I felt like I had tried everything under the sun and nothing was working.
What seemed to work and I didn't start this until he is 15 months old, is a bedtime routine and his poohbear. A hour before bedtime, we would settle things down around the house (turning lights out and keeping things quite) and I would get him ready for his bath. During his bath, I used a all natural lavender bathwash (which I wouldn't use if yours has skin issues) and I'd sing to him.
After his bath, I'd keep the light low and I would lotion his whole body. My husband and I found this Poohbear that play soft music for 20 to 30 minutes which saved my life!! I put him in bed with his poohbear turned on, I also left a small lightnight on so if he did wake up in the middle of the night he would know where he was. I told him goodnight and I would leave. Don't back in there unless he is "really" crying. I felt horrible for letting him cry, I would sit at his door and cry but I knew if I went in there then he would rely on me to comfort him and he needed to learn to comfort himself.
It took me two nights to get him to learn to put himself to sleep. The first night he cried for an hour, second night for 20 mins. After he learned to put himself to sleep, when he woke up in the middle of the night, he would turn on poohbear and fall asleep on his own!

I feel that the bed time routine helps get his head into bedtime mode. Poohbear helps so much because it was something he could do to comfort himself back to sleep. I felt like a new women getting 6 to 8 hours of continues sleep!

Good luck girl!

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S.L.

answers from Dallas on

I never read any of the books, at 9 weeks my son starting sleeping through the night, we did the in and out of his room patting him on the back, telling him he was okay and he did cry, but not more than 10 min. it took 2 nights and all was great, we did the same with our daughter also. They never slept with us, and they have always loved their beds and had no problems putting them to bed, they loved their sleep, and were always happy rested kids!!

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M.F.

answers from Dallas on

If he's sleeping in the bassinet and not the crib, maybe you could put the bassinet in his room. That's what we did when we transitioned our son to his crib. I know there are weight requirements on those things, but you shouldn't have to worry until he's rolling over. Another thought might be if the bassinet basket part detaches from the legs, set the basket in the crib until he's used to that environment. I have several friends who did this with kids who would only sleep in a bouncy seat (because of reflux).

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K.L.

answers from Dallas on

Well, I, personally, don't think 3 months is too early to sleep through the night because my oldest did it. He's now 2 1/2. My youngest is almost 4 months, and he is NOT sleeping through the night. He goes 6 hours max before waking. My pediatrician said he should be doing 8-10 hour stretches by now, but not so. We did move him to his crib about 2-3 weeks ago. He's doing okay in there...took some adjusting. I do agree that putting them in their bed when drowsy, but not asleep is best. My youngest is learning to go to sleep in his crib.

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J.I.

answers from Dallas on

It may be to early for your son. Try reading the book Baby Wise. We modified it some but it worked great for us. My son is 4 moths and sleeps from 9:00 pm - 6:30 am when his dad wakes him up to get ready to go. However, we were just a the doctors on Monday and she said her three month old is not sleeping through the night yet. Also, a side note, at this age they consider sleeping through the night to be 5 hour stretches. As parents we think it should be more. Good luck and just go with the flow. He will let you know when he is ready.

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A.M.

answers from Dallas on

There is a book out there called Baby Wise. It is the greatest ever in teaching you how to get your child to sleep through the night in their own crib and making feeding schedules. I recommend this book to any new mother.

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D.D.

answers from Dallas on

Nathaniel may like the cozy feeling of the bassinet as opposed to the openness of the crib. Look into the Snuggle Nest Cosleeper (available at Babies R Us). http://www.toysrus.com/search/index.jsp?kwCatId=&kw=s...
While it is intended for cosleeping in your bed, we use it in our 3 month old's crib to give him that cozy feeling. It also has a little light built in which is great! We took out the incline pillow and we position him on his side using the sleep positioners included (he doesn't like being on his back). We wrap a blanket over the snuggle nest and tuck it in around and under the snuggle nest bed. This keeps the blanket on them (like swaddling), but doesn't confine their limbs. My son hates his arms being tied down in swaddling and they say you shouldn't swaddle after a month because their legs need to come up for their hips to develop properly. Swaddling too much past a month or so can lead to hip dysplasia.

Also, avoid babywise for now and recognize that 3 months probably is too early to be sleeping through the night. They need to eat more often with their small tummies and being on a liquid diet. And he very well may need the closeness of his mommy. Can't blame him. It wasn't until recent times that humans developed cribs and baby monitors so that babies would sleep away from their mommies.

The crib may also just be an unfamiliar place to him if you are just now starting him in it. Start putting him in it for short amounts of time during the day - maybe to stare at the Fisher Price crib aquarium and gradually let him get used to spending a few minutes at a time in there. As he gets more comfortable, he will eventually nap in the crib (falling asleep while watching the Fisher Price crib aquarium) and maybe put him in his crib the first leg of the night. Then bring him into your room in the bassinet after that if he needs it. Gradually, as he grows and sleeps longer, he will stay in his crib longer and you won't have to bring him to your room in the bassinet.

Finally, read this page for some more great ideas and realistic expectations: http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T070300.asp

Good luck!

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S.P.

answers from Dallas on

We used Baby Wise and loved it! Of course I modified it some because some can be a little harsh. My son slept 5-6 hour stretches at 7 weeks and at 11 weeks he slept through the night (10-6). I completely recommend it. Just keep in mind you will need to modify it a little to adjust to what works for you guys best. Good luck!

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