Sleeping Habits - Makawao, HI

Your son is right. Babies know best where they need to sleep. Here are tons of links to studies done that say co-sleeping is best and why:

http://www.drjaygordon.com/alezav16/default2.asp?tree=541

I am editing my friend's doctoral thesis about attachment parenting now. If only the common mother knew what clinicians know! I'm happy to send you (or anyone) more info if you have a deeper interest.

Best of luck to you and your beautiful son!

2 moms found this helpful

I still sleep with my Daughter... I know it sounds crazy to some... but I love it and so does she... Who made up that sleep alone rule anyways... Probably some Man... I understand that you are a single mom but if you weren't ... you would not be sleeping alone either. :) Just go with it... You don't have anyone else at home to complain about it!

1 mom found this helpful

Hi N...I sent Troy some really good past posts on sleeping issues, that had some really great responses that you may find helpful. My friends little girl used to wake up through out the night also and she used to feed her a yogurt and milk about 30 minutes before bed to fill up her belly and it would help her sleep better. If not all night but at least for 4-5 hours straight. He might still be wanting to get up to eat as he did as a baby. You can try giving him a sippy of milk if he wakes up, rock him for a bit and lay him back in his crib. After a few nights of this he may actually start sleeping again. Hopefully Mamasource will help you find a solution..if not have Troy come get baby in the morning and let you sleep..lol. Good luck..W.

maybe less nap time? also get him outside - he's probably walking real well, take him for long walks so he's tired at bedtime

It sounds like you would both get a lot more sleep if you just took him to bed with you. Several months ago another mother was asking how to get her 3 year old to sleep in her room and not what is known as the family bed. There was a pediatrician, but can't remember the name. Anyway he said that they have found unless i'm not remembering right that children that sleep with the parents are much better adjusted, smart etc. In other countries this is common practice, hopefully someone reading this will be able to tell you about it.

I'd like to see how other single moms respond. When I split up with my first husband, our son was only 8 months and at about a year always wanted to sleep with me. I eventually got a big bed for him and would sleep with him in his room. It stayed this way until he was almost 9 years old and I got my soon-to-be second husband. It only took a week for him to sleep alone.

Down load "The Sleep Sense Program". She talks about 3 different methods to get you child to sleep. I chose the "stay in the room method" and it really worked well. Best of luck!! L.

I had the same problem with my son. He is over 2 now and we have found that he has a VERY hard time with teething. He still has a hard time napping and sleeping when his teeth comes in. We would give him tylenol and Hyland's teething tablets and that helped him with his pain and discomfort.

Hi N.,
A good friend of mine swears by the book healthy sleep habits, happy child by Dr. Marc Weissbluth. Also, The happiest baby on the block by Dr. Harvey Karp is good and an easy read. good luck to you:)

Hi N., I am a Sleep Consultant and Parenting Coach. Most of the time when a child is waking up in the night it is because they are going to bed too late when they are already over-tired. I would be curious to know what his bedtime is and also how he is napping. I would guess that he is not getting enough nap and going to bed after 7:00. If you need more help you can visit my website at www.theindependentchild.com. I hope this helps,
K. Smith

hi. my daughter did that a little earlier then your son at about 9 months. what i did was got her up out of bed and gave her 1/2 a sippy cup with milk and let her lay in my bed for a while (30 mins) then i would tell her ok back to bed you go and put her back to bed. she would fuss for about 5 mins and then go quiet (either sleeping or playing). i also got her attacted to a stuffed animal we got her (piggy). now every night she goes to bed piggy is with her. sometimes she takes bunny to bed but usually only when shes not home (we dont want to risk loosing piggy lol). try to get him attached to a favorite stuffed to. we also just transferred my daughter to a toddler bed (shes 18 months) and she does well in it. my husband and i are separated right now and my daughter acts better with him gone then when hes here (strange huh?) just hang in there and maybe try putting him to bed a little later or earlier. some kids will have trouble sleeping if they are over tired. good luck!

I would suggest co-sleeping. Before I had my son, I saw my brother and sister-in-law co-sleeping with their babies and thought that there was no way I would ever do that. My son slept well in his crib until he was close to 1 year old. Between teething and a few colds, he started waking up in the middle of the night. We started taking him into our bed so we could get enough sleep (I had to leave for work by 6:15am). Now he is 18 mo old and I am addicted to sleeping with him. We will most likely transition him straight into a toddler bed soon instead of back into a crib.

Wow sweetie let him cry for three hours is a lot of crying and it is not working. I suggest a couple of things.

Put his crib in your bedroom, he might have had a few nightmares and woken up alone which can be scary, eventually when he sleeps through the night you can put his bed back into his room gradually.

Also before you go to sleep (night #1) make a big party it is the sleeping all night party where you give him a gift of a sleep all night companion a teddy bear or something very soft and cuddly. Explain to him exactly what you are doing and why in plane but intelligent terms.

When he wakes up go to him immediately and remind him of the cuddly sleeping bear and how your baby is waking him up. Calm him down without picking him up and go back to sleep. Repeat steady for as many times as you have to (don't let your baby cry so long) but increase the times in between going there (5 mn - 10 mn - 15 mn- 30 mn)

When he sleeps in longer stretches reward him big time like pick him up and give him a big kiss tell him you are so happy he slept that long. The put him back down and give him his sleep bear and tell him you want to see how much longer he can seep yet!!!!

Even if he gives you a short hour, make a big deal again when he wakes up.

I know this sounds like a lot of work, but remember you did not learn how to ride on a two wheel bike overnight a new behavior takes a little time but big rewards.

Hope this helps

Hi N.
Go to www.youngliving.com and order the Roman Chamomile essential oil. Apply it to your son's feet before bed and have him inhale some of the oil too from your palm's.
It has a very relaxing effect and is safe for little one's. I have seen great results with it in children with the same problem as your son's. Try it for at least two weeks!

Good luck, and you can email me with any questions.

C. Tanaka, DC
www.naturallifechiro.com

N.,

My son having asthma (when sick and not sick) had the bad habit of always sleeping with us in our bed.

Although he just turned 4 this week, I thought of something about 6 months ago. You know all those stuffed animals that just sit there, get played with every couple months and then sit there again. Well my son has a tall tiger stuffed animal, he's about my sons height, so now my son has a bed buddy. Sometimes he trades off with brownie (a tall brown dog with big brown ears). He hugs them as he previously did us.

Eventually, I'm weaning him off the bed buddy. I don't see anything wrong with the bed buddy as they are still small and there is plenty of time to build their self confidence and get them usto being independent. In fact, my son is very independent, at 2 years old he was potty trained, at 2 he also dressed himself, at 3 he started choosing his own clothes and laying out his outfit and also showering by himself (Of course, I overlook him for cleanliness) and get this he even washes behind his ears.

Good luck.

We have older kids now, and we still listen to thier night time needs. Kids go through so many changes all the time and our philosophy is that one day they wont want or need us anymore, and the time is flying by, So we give them what they need now. I used to stay up at night alot and got cranky, so now my husband who can sleep anywhere will tend to them when they wake in the night, which still happens. Sleep choices are individual choices, some parents have their kids cry it out and learn to self soothe, That is just not our style. Figure out what your style is, what works for you. My sister in law let her kids cry it out for hours and they turned out just fine. But I cannot and will not do that. It is all a personal choice.

Hi N..

I like the idea that the others had about giving your son a sippy cup with milk in it.

I also wanted to suggest that creating a ritual of what you will do with your son every time he wakes up will create a sense of comfort for him. Whether it be giving him milk and a cuddle before putting him back to bed or whether it be rocking him for a few minutes or reading him a story. His desire is to be in bed with you, so he is looking for comfort. He may be looking for something else too (if he is hungry). And if having him sleep with you doesn't work for you, then finding another way to give him the comfort he needs in a routine way will help him to feel safe and to know that you are there for him.

I wouldn't suggest trying a bunch of different things. Choose one that you like and just do that. Talk to him about what you are doing ahead of time (he isn't too young to understand you) and then follow through. Then do the same exact thing every night. It may take three hours the first night, but every night it should get shorter and shorter until it is no longer happening.

Talk to him the whole time. Let him know he's safe and that you are there with him.

Then I would suggest getting some help (like the other mother said) for the morning time for a little while. Cuz you are gonna need sleep until he gets the hang of it. If that's not an option perhaps you napping is. Whatever works until you both are sleeping through the night again.

The best of luck!!!

Think about getting this book and trying this method. I used it for both my boys and have had friends use it with equal success. http://www.babycenter.com/0_the-ferber-method-demystified...

I say keep it up (let him cry)...eventually, it will take him less and less time to fall asleep. My daughter (17 months) used to do that too. Sometimes I thought that she was getting her nap time confused with her night sleeping. She did eventually grow out of that. Now, she wakes up early morning (4am) and I bring her into my bed to sleep for another 2-3 hours. Yes, I know that's not the best thing to do. My expierence with her, is that unless I bring her into my bed to go back to sleep. She will WAKE UP at that early time....no thank you! Stay strong, I know how hard it is to hear your child cry. I have let my daughter cry for a while in her crib, just to find out that she actually had a poopy diaper. Talk about guilt!!!! I just check on her really quick, and then I'm out the door. I'm in there for maybe 1 minute tops!
Good luck, it will eventually end.

Try reading "No Cry Sleep Solution" by Pantley

Try giving your son a warm bath or some warm milk. It works for my daughter who is 19 months old. If he does not eat well for dinner, his little tummy may need something to carry him through the night.

He might be hungrey, do you feed him ceral with his dinner, something that keeps his belly full, you know lets look at what your missing here, he is only 14 months old, 14 months,,, a timy baby, ctying for 3 hrs long, 3 hrs long, there is nothing wrong for him to sleep with mom & dad you can break him of it later, besides couldnt you use a good night sleep like three days in a row.. how sad my husband just said 3 hrs