Sleeping at Daycare - Keokuk,IA

I haven't read all the responses, but I did see one that recommends Weissbluth's "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child." I totally recommend reading that book. Plus, you can blame the need to change her schedule based on that book. He would say that the morning nap should be from 9-10/11. She shouldn't be sleeping later than 11, because that's what throws off her afternoon nap starting so late. Then, her afternoon nap should start at 1pm. She'll wake up earlier and be ready for bed earlier! BUT, remember that she does need to go down earlier--around 7pm would be my guess. Good luck!

No, they absolutely need to be waking her up if it's affecting her sleep at night. My daughter has always had set nap limits, and I've never had a problem with waking her up and having it be a problem. If she was a newborn, I'd say let her sleep, but by 11 months she doesnt need that much nap.

Hi S.,

I am a childcare provider for the past 21 years. Most children under the age of one need a morning nap as well as an afternoon nap. That being said, your little one is sleeping entirely too much during the day. Her morning nap should be somewhere around 30-45 minutes long and her afternoon nap around 1 1/2 to 2 1/2 hours long. My kids usually go down around 9:30 for a short nap (sometimes I only let them sleep 15-30 minutes) and then right back up and into the days' activities. I put all the kids down around 12pm after lunch and we are back up by 2-2:30 which gives us time for an afternoon activity as well as snack.

I would talk to your provider and tell her that you are having difficulty getting your child to bed at night and ask that she please limit her morning nap to 30-45 minutes and then her afternoon nap to no more than 2 hours. It seems to me that your child naps during the times when the provider may be busier with the other children (activities/outdoor play) but your little one SHOULD be involved with those activities on some level. Realistically, by the time a child gets to a year, you should within a month or so be eliminating the morning nap anyway.

I could certainly understand it if your child was 3-4 months, this schedule would seem reasonable, but not at 11 months.

This is just my humble opinion, but a very realistic one, as well. Good luck!

C.

On a side note, I have an issue with "Gamma G's" comments. I have an in-home childcare. Not only do all my children have many, many activities to choose from (puzzles, books, books on tape, sorting toys, lace cards, crayons, scissors, tracing tools, dry erase boards for learning letters/numbers, water play, manipulative play, cooking in a real kitchen, blocks, large motor toys, dollies, trucks, tents, and outside a 20x30 foot sandbox with play equipment, bikes/trikes, balls, sandtoys, trucks, sidewalk chalk, garden, lots of outdoor play) but they also have "real time" with not only children their own age/development stage, but other children, younger and older. We are a real family, learning how to care for one another, every day.

What they ALSO get in my childcare is plenty of one-on-one time with someone who has known them from birth, someone who has held them for every bottle, kissed every boo boo, held them when they are sick, taught them how to use the bathroom, how to share and be a good friend, how to be gentle with a younger sibling and who from day one in my childcare has had time in my lap and arms, with 1000's of kisses and hugs over the course of the time they have spent with me. That, my dear, you CAN'T get at a childcare center with multiple teachers and THAT is ulimately important for a growing child.

Respectfully.

I did home daycare for a couple of years and always followed that same addage: NEVER wake a sleeping baby. That was my rule of thumb for sleeping ones. I would, however, open the door if they were in a quiet bedroom or open the shades on the windows or turn the light on so that the child would wake up sooner on their own. Also, if the parents had any particular requests on this, I would follow their wishes.

I think you have the right idea in approaching your childcare provider with the teamwork approach, that you want to work WITH her to help your daughter get on a predictable schedule and that you are having trouble getting her to sleep at night. Ask if she would please offer your child 2 naps per day (or one if you do one nap at home), and that after 2 hours, that she open the door, turn on the lights, open the shades on the windows, so that your daughter begins to wake up naturally. Your childcare provider won't feel she is waking up your baby, but your daughter will wake up sooner on her own by hearing the noise in the house and the light of the room. Explain that you are having a hard time getting her to sleep at night, and you would like her to sleep less at daycare so that she can have a longer night's sleep at home. I'm sure your childcare provider will understand and be willing to work with you! Just be sure to keep it positive and don't try to "blame" her for your child's sleeping habits - it really is just something that you all need to work on together and agree on the solution!

ps - I have an 11 month old also, and he takes one nap each day for approx 2-3 hours, so it would be resonable to ask that your child have 1 nap each day, maybe after lunch until she wakes up. FYI

I also provide daycare in my home. I usually try to have the older infants take a shorter morning nap, and take their long nap in the afternoon while the toddlers nap. My 11 month old daycare baby has a schedule that looks like this: Nap from 9:30-10:30
play time from 10:00-1:00 or 1:30
Nap from 1:00 -3:30

I try to have them take a shorter in the am, so they will get to play with the other kids. I always aim to have them take their afternoon nap with the big kids, even if that means shortening their morning naps. Why don't you suggest this type of schedule to your sitter. A good daycare provider should work with the parents. She is sleeping way to much during the day, and this is why she is not tired at night! Tell her to wake your son up by 4:00 so she will go to bed at home. If she will not do what you want her to do, find a new sitter!!

Before you fire the day care, I'd check with the pediatrician to see what their thoughts are. 11 months is right around a big developmental surge, and she may either be preparing for a growth spurt or there may be something else going on that the pediatrician would want to address medically.

It doesn't sound like she'll be moving from one class to another (if I'm reading your message correctly). Our daughter transition to a new class with only 1 nap at 10.5 months. She's now 2 and consistently sleeps ~2.5 hours during the day unless she's sick, and she'll sleep much more.

You can request that she be on 1 nap/day or 2 shorter naps - the excuse of never waking a sleeping baby sounds like it's easier on her not to deal with a cranky kid than anything - especially if she has a lot of kids of different ages there without help.

Good luck. If you do make a chance in providers, it's going to be so much easier on your daughter at this age than at a later age.

that seems like a lot of sleep to me. i'd have her health checked out by the pediatrician to rule out any physical ailments. also, not to be paranoid but make sure she doesn't seem groggy when being picked up from daycare b/c that could mean she's being medicated to sleep. i've read enough articles on this happening to know it CAN happen!

I would not like that either. Something is not right. I might find another daycare. I am not saying this to scare you but are you sure she is not giving her something to make her sleep??? You might want to check into this. good luck!

This is an indicator she's not getting enough sleep at night. That is a really late bedtime for a child this age. Try putting her to bed around 7:30-8. She still likely will need the two naps a day they just won't be for as long. Sleep is very good for children and I too wouldn't wake her, it's just an indicator that something else is off. Our 17mo old still takes 2 naps a day and sleeps 7:30-6:30am at night, it really just depends on the child.

In the end you are a customer. If you are asking her to please wake your child after a certain amount of sleep, it should be done without questions asked. By 11 months old, its really not that big of a deal to wake them up after an hour-hour and a half of sleep. The whole "don't wake a sleeping baby" thing is for newborns! Its not as though you're asking her to not allow your daughter to sleep, just not sleep so much. Speaking as someone who has worked at daycares off and on for several years, the request is a common and reasonable.

If she's still not willing to work with you, perhaps its time to find a new care provider. Her unwillingness to work with you says to me (as a parent and a care giver) that she's just trying to make her day easy and letting a kid sleep through much of the day is easy.

I really think you need to put her to bed earlier. An 11 month old should not be up until 10pm. I would start putting her to bed a half hour earlier until you get to 8pm.....I really think this will help the napping.

I am a daycare provider, so this is coming from my angle... I am also a parent, so there may be some of that in here too (didn't read the other posts, so sorry if this is repetitious)

Talk to your provider...for me the best thing I can ask for is open communication. I am not sure of her daily schedule, but I don't think that there is any harm is shortening both naps by about 1/2 hour to 45 mins. It does seem like a lot of sleep to me.

I am not sure that this is necessarily the DC's fault that she sleeps so long. I've noticed that kids get into a routine/habit for a number of reasons. This may be started by her recent cold or just by "habit" at daycare. I have a child that will sleep here for 3 hours a day (if I let her) that won't take a nap to save her life at home.... we are both baffled by that one!

Open communication and a non-accusational tone is all that I can ask for from my parents. In the end, it is your child, so if you'd like to be able to get to sleep at night, I would want to respect that!

good luck!

That is way too much sleep for a child that is almost a year old! That is more like a schedule for a newborn, not your daughter's age. And the "never wake a sleeping baby" sounds like the motto of a person who has no experience in daycare not the other way around. When a child is sick, no I do not wake them as they need the rest, but that much sleep is crazy! She cannot be sleeping very well at night getting 6-7 hours of sleep at daycare. I've been doing daycare in my home and as a private nanny for almost 9 years and here is what I would say a child that age should get:

Get to daycare at 7am and maybe still have a morning nap around 9am for 30min to 1 hour tops. Then wake her and she plays, eats, tires out, etc... Afternoon nap from 12-3pm the latest and wake her. Bedtime around 8pm, no evening nap by this point. She should be giving up the morning nap entirely by 18 months. Then she would just take one regular afternoon nap that would need to be 2-3 hours. I think anything less than 2 hours is not long enough for them, but more than 3 is pushing it if you want a good nights sleep. Eventually when the kids get around 2 years old they take naps here from 1-3pm that last until they go off to pre-k. If they don't actually sleep that is fine, but they have to lay down and rest quietly.

These are just some rough guidlines, but I have watched dozens of kids from newborn to age 8 and this is the norm. Honestly I would probably be looking for a new daycare as it seems this lady is a bit lazy and is going to just let your daughter sleep all day. I do not say that lightly, I usually would be the first to come to a providers defense as I am also one and sometimes parent's expect something that is not realistic. A child that is about a year old should be getting about 3 hours of napping a day, 4 at the absolute most if she is going to have a good night sleep. I do think she needs to be napping longer with you guys based on what you said, but not nearly as much as she naps at daycare. Good luck.

I so agree with Charlotte, home child care providers provide LOTS of love and care. We usually treat the kids we care for like our own, hugs and kisses throughout the day, a variety of activites in a home like setting. For the most part, children do not get this in a large setting. So many people were quick to criticize the daycare owner. You said you "mentioned" the sleep time to her, I suggest you sit down and talk with her about your concerns. If she doesn't know how strongly you feel or know that there is a problem getting her to sleep, she can't work on the issue. I will say though, she should know that having your daughter sleep until 5pm is way too long, and she obviously is missing out on activities. Keep the lines of communication open and your family will have a loving childcare provider for many years.

I would say try to put her to bed way earlier. My 14 month old goes to bed by 7:00 every night and wakes up at 7:00. The later they go to sleep the harder it is for them to go to sleep and 8 1/2 hours of sleep is not enough at night. My oldest daughter took 2- 2 hour naps around 11 months old and slept from 7:30-6:30. Both of my girls are in an in-home daycare. I would have the daycare lady wake her up after 2 hours for both naps and then you may be able to try to ge tthe baby to sleep earlier. I work all day so a 7:00 bedtime works out great. I have a couple of hours to clean or relax with my husband.

I am assuming this is something sort of new, not her regular daily schedule for her whole life, if it is then please move your child to a regular child care center with lots of kids. Your child will stay awake just watching all the activity going on around her. If it is new then here are my thoughts:

Your baby is most likely about to have a growth spurt. All of my 6 grand kids and all the kids at my child care center did this. They will have periods of time of the years where they just can't get enough sleep. Their body is resting up or just storing up the energy needed to grow. Suddenly you'll look at her and she'll be an inch taller when she wakes up, or her feet won't fit in her shoes that she just had on this morning.

It could also be she is still fighting this past illness and her body is repairing itself. When we feel bad as adults we tend to keep going and going when we are sick and then suddenly just keel over and sleep about 10 hours. It's the same thing with the little ones except their time frame is much smaller, they can't go days and days they go hours and hours then crash for a couple of days.

If she were not going to home child care she would have activities with other kids to participate in. I think that is the one draw back of home child care. They just don't have the classroom situation. She may not be getting the mental stimulation she needs and is bored so she sleeps.

At this stage in a regular child care center she would be getting prepared to move up to the toddler room. She would be working towards a single nap time and from a crib to a cot, which is why it's a natural transition at home to move to a toddler bed at the same time.

I would never use home child care for the reason's I've stated above but I KNOW it works better for so many people. I love the energy and sounds of a full child care center with activities going on all around and children's minds just expanding every moment. My center was licensed for 30 (no more than 30 children in the building at any time) but I had over 58 enrolled, some were just weekends and others were different shifts because I was open extended hours.

Talk to your provider and ask her what changes she has seen in your child. Does she thing she is acting ill? Is she acting out of sorts, cranky, irritable? Does she seem clumsy, hands awkward, stumbling? That could mean growth spurt...

Every child is different but yes, that is too much sleeping at her age. She should only be taking a couple hours each time if she needs it. Around that age is when our children went to one longer nap during the day 2.5-3 hours in the afternoon. I would definately explain to the daycare lady that it may be a bit of a whiney fest until the baby gets used to it but she does need to sleep less during the day to sleep more at home. Maybe try explaining that she isn't sleeping well at home with all of the sleeping she is doing at daycare.

That is a LOT of sleep for an 11month old. If she's not sick anymore, could she be going through a growth spurt? How has she behaved with them in the past?

Especially if you're having trouble at night as a result, I would ask the daycare person to wake her up gently. That doesn't sound right to me, but she may be going through something. I would ask that they keep a close eye on her to make sure that she's behaving normally after they do wake her up. That may be indicative of something else, if she's not.

Every daycare I have worked at the afternoon naptime is around 12-230. Where I am at now (and my 8 month old daughter) Infants nap morning 9-1030ish and 12-230/300ish. She probably wouldn't be up until 10 pm if her afternoon nap wasn't so late. An infant that age should be weaning off her morning nap...more like 30-60 minutes. At her year check you might want to consult her dr about her sleep schedule. You could call around to some centers/homes and get an idea of their day to see what other people/centers do. I don't believe she is using her naps to catch up...her naps are interfering with her night sleep. Good luck!

All I can say is wow....I have been doing daycare for 17 years and that is a goofy schedule! At the age of 11-12 months I am usually trying to ween the morning nap...A schedule is very important for a child....I would set a schedule at home and tell her this is what you are doing and would like her to be on the same at daycare.If she is unwilling to do so check around maybe this isn't the place for you! I love when I have parents that want to keep the kids on a schedule...(believe it or not there are alot of those who don't want or don't keep schedules very good!)..My nap schedule is morning nap 9-10 after noon nap 12:30 -3:00 most kids don't sleep the full hour in the morning at this age and most times get about 1/2 hour....Then when you are ready to take it away you are down to one nap in the afternoon...Most daycares I know run this schedule. If you get on a good one, she should go to bed between 8-9pm...Good luck!!

Well, first of all, my babies have always slept better at daycare, so I wouldn't worry too much about why she's sleeping better there. That said, if it is effecting her nighttime sleep, then you should absolutely tell your daycare provider to limit daytime naps. At that age, with two naps/day, I would tell her to limit them to no more than 2 hours each. Sounds like your daycare provider, while undoubtedly thinking she is doing what is best for the kids, might be a little stubborn and unlikely to follow your instructions. If you find that to be the case, maybe time to think about what qualities in daycare are important to you (and how the provider does at meeting your other expectations).

.

If you are not putting her to bed until 10pm and she gets up at 6:30, the nap time sounds about right to me. At that age, my kids went to bed by 8pm, were up around 6-7am and still took about 3 hours worth of nap during the day. Seems like she is using one nap to catch up on what she is not getting at night and the other nap time is pretty typical. If you want to get her on a schedule to get her down earlier, you will probably just need to start getting her down earlier and she will naturally change up her napping routine. If you try to have her skip a nap or wake up too early from her nap, she may then be overtired at night time and still have a tough time going on. I would suggest moving her bed time up earlier and earlier maybe by 15 minute increments every few days or each week.

She shouldn't be napping that much at her age, but I also don't think she is getting enough sleep at night. Talk to the daycare provider about limiting her nap time. Shorter morning nap, maybe 9:00-10:00am and a longer afternoon, maybe 1:00-3:00pm. Then put her down earlier at night. Somewhere between 7-8pm. If your provider won't work with you, it's time to find someone new.

Does your daycare provider have a specific time that she puts the young ones down to sleep every day or do they fall asleep whereever they are? Sounds like from the varying schedule that it's pretty much the daycare provider going through her day and then when/if the little ones fall asleep, she carries them off to sleep for as long as they can. I would want a little bit more consistent schedule for the baby. I am not a "strict scheduler" as some moms are, but even with my kids there was a basic structure to their naptimes and approximately what time I took them up to their room to lay down. I think I would work with her to come up with a schedule for your daughter's naps. I know she has other kids to care for so I wouldn't expect that she could have your daughter down at precisely 8:00 every morning but I think giving her an idea such as (a 2 hour nap in the morning sometime from 7-10:30 and then another 2 hour nap in the afternoon sometime from 1:30 -4:00) should be possible for her to adhere to.

Good luck,
K.

You should read "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr. Weissbluth. The fact that she is taking long naps should actually be fine, and shouldn't be interfering with her night sleep. But she should be on a schedule. Anyway, check out the book, it should help you a lot.