8 answers

Sleep Problems - Saint Charles, MO - Mom with 2 kids

My daughter is almost 4 and wakes up every night and come into our room. My husband and I are too tired to fight with her about this anymore. We have tried taking her back to her room. She also will not go to sleep unless one of us is laying with her. She always was a good sleeper until we moved when she was 2 1/2 and they got worse when she sister was born 3 months later. Any suggestions on how my husband and I can start getting a good night sleep?

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I know that this might sound strange...but I am a single mother of a little boy who is 3. And to keep him in his room at night I have put a child gate across his door. I put it upside down because he knows how to unlock it. It works good for me and it keeps him in his room. Before I used it I had to sit in his room at night till he went to sleep to keep him in his room plus i am worried he might get into things at night. Just an idea.

GOOD LUCK!!

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Here are a few ideas that didn't help my four year old stay in his room and sleep but that might help your daughter :-)
-Make a trip to the store to pick out a sleeping friend like a stuffed animal or blanket. It will make your daughter feel she has more control
-Let your daughter sleep with a photo of you or someone else they feel safe with.
-Make a ritual bedtime routine and don't deviate from it. Like brush teeth, go potty, read a book, (prayers?), then daughter goes to sleep and mom has adult time
-Tell her that she doesn't have to go to sleep, just stay in her room through the night. Explain that you feel tired and want your rest for tomorrow, but she can do what she wishes as long as she stays in her room. When the next day arrives, get her up at her normal time. she will be cranky, but she may get that going to sleep is a privilege, not a punishment. It works better if the night you implement this you have something planned the next day that she would enjoy. She might be too young for this technique, I am not sure.
-When she awakes, go to her instead. Lay with her in her bed or on the floor. When she is asleep you can slip back to your room. This way she knows you aren't giving in. THis worked for me, until I was so exhuasted from getting up and down (I have three kids)I would sleep more soundly. My son would awake, not make a sound and slip into my bed. I never even knew he was next to me until the next morning!
-Let her pick out a flashlight to make her feel safe. The drawback: 4 year olds like to play with them instead of sleeping. But if you do this when something fun is planned the next day, and she oversleeps, she might feel it is important to sleep but feel safe if she awakes with a flashlight.
-Give her something that smells like you. Like a shirt you have had for a long time. I have also tried body pillows in his bed so he would feel as if someone is laying by him. This worked for me for a while.

Maybe being four is just scary given new comprehension of ideas and learning new concepts. I think my four year old tests me to see what he can get away with and this is one thing that he can control. when he sleeps. So, good luck, and if this sparks any ideas please send them my way. You are not alone. :-) B.

I see you work. Find out from the person who is caring for her during the day if she is taking naps. I would find out what time and how long. They maybe putting her down in the afternoon and letting her sleep for several hours. This is what was happening with my son when he was this age. Maybe they can not let her sleep so long in the afternoon, or put her down earlier like noon or something. Some sitters let the kids sleep as long as they want and they are sleeping all afternoon!

This will not be easy trust me I know I have been there with 2 of my children. But you just have too put your foot down or it will not end and if you do eventually she will stop and you will be so glad that you did. Start a nightly ritual with her whether it be reading her a book, telling her a verbal story or singing her a song whatever it is do it every night then tell her when it is over that you will be leaving at first you might try I will stay with you for 5 minutes and then take away a minute every night or every other night, then when they are all gone you just have to leave her in there and keep putting he back when she gets up, children are smart she will figure it out after a while that you are not messing around and it is getting her no where and she will give up! Good luck!

I know that this might sound strange...but I am a single mother of a little boy who is 3. And to keep him in his room at night I have put a child gate across his door. I put it upside down because he knows how to unlock it. It works good for me and it keeps him in his room. Before I used it I had to sit in his room at night till he went to sleep to keep him in his room plus i am worried he might get into things at night. Just an idea.

GOOD LUCK!!

My 4 year old son started getting up in the middle of the night about a year ago. At first it was so frustrating because I had a new baby that was sleeping through the night but my son wasn't. He would scream until one of us would come in sometimes he would go back to sleep and other times he would get in bed with us. Now he still gets up most nights but he knows he just gets up and comes to our bed, no more waking to the screaming. Although this is not the ideal situation I think it is just a phase. My mom said all three of us went through this. She said at one point she and my dad had all three of us in their full size bed. She also said that she would even get up go to the sofa to get away from us and a couple hours all of us were on the sofa with her. At least we have a king size bed.LOL

I am going throught he very same thing with my 4 year old daughter. We take her back to her bed every time she comes in but i was loosing a lot of sleep. Her step mom came up with a sticker chatr for her(they had the same problem with her there as well) and so far that has helped a ton. for every 10 stars she gets, she gets a treat....be it a toy, piece of candy, new outfit, or an extra scoope of ice cream. (we are currently working up to 20 stars for a treat.)
she still has a night every now and then that she is up, but not nightly anymore.
Good Luck!

I know this isn't the "best" solution, but it worked for our son. We put a tv and dvd player in his room to watch at bedtime. We recorded and played episodes of Nogin for him and he was out like a light. We've had no sleep problems since.

I'm kinda going through the same thing. Our 4 year old isn't wanting to sleep without us either. We are finding that if we give our daughter a warm bath with a lavender scented soap that it seems to calm her down and makes her sleep better. we also make sure her blanket is warm by sticking it in the dryer for just a few mins each night. its working pretty well for us.

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