12 answers

Sleep Help! 8 Month Old Still Waking Often

Needing some sleep help! My 8 month old DD is still waking 2-3x/night. I haven't had more than 4 hours of straight sleep in 16 months (had insomnia during pregnancy). I know I'm partially or fully responsible for the problem, as typically when she wakes I nurse her (I'm not really sure if she is hungry, I think I just do it because in the blur of the night I know it'll get her back to sleep). Thus, she's waking in the middle of the night because she's accustomed to eating. How do I get out of this cycle? I can't seem to bear letting her cry. I tried this morning at 5am to let her cry for 20 minutes, but then went in picked her up, soothed her to calm her down, put the pacifier back and she went back to sleep.

Typical night:
6pm - bedtime: I nurse her then put her down awake and put the pacifier in
10:30pm/11pm - she wakes, I try to pat her back and put pacifier back in, but she typically gets too worked up so I nurse and put her back down (awake) (and do diaper chg in dark)
2:30am - I think we may have eliminated this waking in the past week, as I stopped feeding her and just walked her
4am/5am - wakes and I typically just nurse her and put her back down (awake) (and do diaper chg in dark as I've tried not to and end up with wet pj's/bedding in AM)
6am/7am - awakes for day

Naps: are 2-3 a day, each about 45 min long. Every so often she surprises me with a longer nap 1.5-2.5 hours, but that's rare. I try to keep a 9am, 1pm nap schedule (and 4pm if she needs it if earlier naps were earlier than normal), but 2 days a week we're at the gym so she doesn't get a morning nap.

This week she's been stirring/waking at 8:30pm, 9:30pm, etc. Also, I don't "run" to her room when she wakes, I try to giver her a few minutes to see if she'll go back to sleep, but don't want to wait too long otherwise she gets herself too hysterical if crying. I always keep everything dark, don't talk to her, don't make eye contact, etc.

I can talk it up and say "I'm going to let her CIO this week" but then reality hits and I can't bear listening to her cry. Help!

Another Add: I think she was/is dairy sensitive. I eliminated dairy at 8 weeks and colic improved -- over holidays I've been eating sweets (cookies, etc.) that likely have butter in them, and haven't noticed increased crying or discomfort, but maybe the dairy sensitivity has manifested itself into sleep disorders (as one mom response mentions)? Don't know much about the dairy sensitivity issue except what I've read online and from other moms (peditrician not helpful).

What can I do next?

Featured Answers

WOW, 6pm is WAY WAY too early for bedtime!!!!!!!!! I would say at least 8pm if not 9pm especially since she is waking up frequently. I would never put a child to bed that early. When she gets older and has a normal schedule maybe stretching it to 7:30pm but no earlier.

More Answers

Babies are physiologically made to sleep in REM throughout the night in order for brain reparation. All day long they are bombarded with a million new sensations, pictures, words, motions, sounds, movements, etc etc etc etc. During naps they are so PHYSICALLY exhausted so they sleep in DEEP sleep. At night though, their brain puts their body in REM or light sleep. That is the only sleep in which their brains can repair, sort out new information and build new cells. Any noise, even their own breathing, can wake them from this. It's unfortunate but it is how they develop!

Also, babies are more comfortable with mom and or dad because during the day you give them comfort and reassurance. At night, alone in their crib, they don't get that which is why it is so difficult for them to get back to sleep after the inevitable waking.

What we have done is put a toddler bed with one side as a crib (so he can't roll out) pushed against the bed, so the open side is flush with our mattress. He sleeps there next to us. He still wakes and cries but it is so easy to console him and he's back in dream land in the blink of an eye!

Also, we still rock our son to sleep... we got an expensive stroller (we were in Norway at the time and needed something all-terrain lol) which we can lie flat. We lay in some soft blankets, pop him in and wrap him in his fav red blanky and gently roll the stroller back and forth (I play mahjong or check emails while doing this) and when he is asleep we lift him out and put him in bed. This has worked well for the past 17 months! Oh I should also mention we had a sling, Baby Bjorn, which we wore him sometimes if he was fussy.

And also remember, we're all as tired as each other in these stages! It obviously gets better, otherwise no one would have second or third or fourth children...or more lol!

1 mom found this helpful

Sorry, but I don't think it's normal for an 8 month old breastfed baby to have a specific routine. Are you breastfeeding on demand? (ensuring your supply?) Have you considered co sleeping? I couldn't imagine getting up every time my infant woke up. Co sleeping is too easy and my 2nd child switched into his crib at 14 months without a tear in 3 nights. Don't feel discouraged - just learn to read her cues and make sure you are on her schedule. It took the second kid for me to figure out that I needed to go to bed earlier! I wanted that grown up night time time, but it's not cohesive w/ raising an infant.
Hang in there. Soon - she'll be weaning down on naps and hopefully that will help.

In the mean time, Valerian Root (which can be found pretty much anywhere vitamins are sold) is safe in breastfeeding and a natural sleep aid. It doesn't make you drowsy and you will still jump awake when the baby sneezes from the other room, but it just takes the edge off sleeplessness, so that when you are awakened you can settle back into sleep quickly. It saved me and I can't recommend it highly enough. It's used to help reduce stress in the daytime - if that gives you any idea how NOT drowsy it makes you. It won't put you to sleep or keep you asleep - just help you settle quickly.

good luck.

1 mom found this helpful

I hate to say this, but if you can't listen to her cry at all, then you are just going to keep getting up in the middle of the night. She is old enough that she doesn't need ANY night feedings, unless she has special nutritional needs or is a nutritional risk.

I bought the Ferber Sleep Solutions book to help me through this TWICE. It has a time table where you go back in after each few minutes (it tells you exactly how long to wait). You soothe your baby with a back rub or a few soft words, then go back out. You teach your baby that you are there, but it is time to sleep. The times get longer and she will learn to get herself to sleep. There is nothing cruel about this, and these sleep skills are invaluable as children get older. It is SO important to know how to relax yourself and drift off. My kids are champs at it. Keep naps to two a day, no more and nothing too close to bedtime. (4 is too late, sorry) 6 is too early for bedtime, stretch it 15 minutes each day until it is 7:30 or 8.

I don't mean to sound like a know it all, but if you knew what I went through with this, you'd understand! haha! Good luck to you. Get this book, trust me, your will get your life back!

1 mom found this helpful

You've received a lot of great info. And it could be one of many things. She's nearing a growth spurt AND working on her large motor skills (something they practice on during their sleep, causing wakeups). She may not be eating enough during the day. She may be doing it out of habit. Sometimes, the baby stuff sucks :( But hopefully, with help from the others you can start to figure out solutions.

My son was a premie with a ton of health/develomental issues, so I try not to use him as an example. He also didn't start sleeping thru the night until 28mos old, or start napping longer than 8-12mins until 22mos.

My son never did well with a strict schedule, but around that age he seemed to do best with the 1-2-3 method. Wake up and 1 hour later go down for a nap. Wake up and 2hrs later go down for a nap. Wake up and 3hrs go down for the night. No hard set times, just an approximate. I also know a several moms who found that their babies just did better by going to bed later (once they started putting their babies down for the night around 8-9pm, their babies slept until 7-9am).

Good luck!

Babies this age wake. Still.
Normal.
Especially when hitting growth-spurts or changes in development.
I always, nursed on-demand.... my kids had ginormous appetites.... and grew like weeds. They woke often too.

Babies... still wake at this age. Normal.

Or try white noise, or a sleep sack....

Also make sure you are producing enough milk... otherwise, even if at breast... a baby will not be getting adequate intake.... to match their growing.... and they will be HUNGRY. NO matter what time of day or night.
That happened to several friends of mine.

my 7 month old has been waking up every 2 hours too and I nurse him and put him back to bed, just so that I can get back to sleep too. I know he's not hungry though. He has been in a pack n play in my bedroom so I have to keep him quiet so he doesn't keep my husband awake who has to get up at 5am. I just moved him to his own bed so that I could let him cry and teach him to go back to sleep on his own without having to nurse. I know you said you can't do it, but it is very effective. And you don't just let them cry and cry. When he wakes up and cries, I don't ignore him, I go in and pat him, maybe pick him up but i don't feed him and if he cries when i leave i let him cry for a bit before i go back in. I will feed him once in the middle of the night. I also put a lullaby cd in his room that plays very quietly all night long and that has really helped. I also dont' put him to bed til 8-9 (he naps usually at 5 or 6pm) and he sleeps til 8 or 9 too which is great for me since I don't go to bed early.

I have an 8 month old and I will nurse him often during the day, put him to bed between 8-9pm and he'll sleep through the night, sometimes for 12 hours. If he has a night where he wakes often, I'll nurse him and put him to bed, if he cries or wakes again soon, I'll let him cry for a little bit, then nurse him again. I allow him to cry a little bit longer each time before going in again. I only have isolated incidence of him crying a lot. Also, I can't eat any dairy or he'll be up for sure. Good luck!!

Has she been sleeping through the night before this and this is a new thing? The reason I ask is maybe she's teething or going through a growth spurt. My daughter turned 9 months yesterday and at about 7 months all of a sudden she was getting up every couple hours, when prior to that she was sleeping all night long. We realized she was getting her two bottom teeth. I did nurse her on demand, mainly it helped get us both back to sleep and within a few weeks everything was back to normal. Someone actually suggested that I NOT nurse her every time b/c if she was going through the night without eating she probably wasn't hungry, so you could try that. To be honest I nursed anyway b/c it comforted her, but she never really nursed very long so I think the person was right, she wasn't hungry just needed comfort and probably was in pain from the teeth.

I never could do the cry it out thing either, when she cries I feel she needs me. Not sure if this helps, but if it has just started maybe it is temporary and she's either getting some teeth or going through a growth spurt and it won't last. It seems like it will last forever, but it won't. Hang in there...hope this helps!

Required Fields

Our records show that we already have a Mamapedia or Mamasource account created for you under the email address you entered.

Please enter your Mamapedia or Mamasource password to continue signing in.

Required Fields

, you’re almost done...

Since this is the first time you are logging in to Mamapedia with Facebook Connect, please provide the following information so you can participate in the Mamapedia community.

As a member, you’ll receive optional email newsletters and community updates sent to you from Mamapedia, and your email address will never be shared with third parties.

By clicking "Continue to Mamapedia", I agree to the Mamapedia Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy.