My daughter has never been a big sleeper, she doesn't take long or frequent naps. And now she doesn't sleep at night, either. Sometimes she'll sleep for 30 minutes to an hour and a half and wake up wide awake. She can go all day, literally 24 hours, without sleeping. She doesn't even seem tired. And now she freaks out when we put her in her crib. She screams, not cries, screams and tears run down her face, and when you pick her up she looks at the crib and then looks at the door, back and forth, like "get me away from that thing!" She did just get her first tooth. She's been eating baby food since she turned four months. All I know is I have to sleep and I know she needs sleep, too. She just doesn't seem to want or need much sleep. Any suggestions?
Have you tried co-sleeping? My son was "allergic" to his crib so we (reluctantly at first) just brought him in bed with us. We ended up getting much better sleep that way. He's very independent (always has been), intelligent, not spoiled, etc. so this has not "ruined" him despite what some might have you think. He's 3 now and sleeps in his own bed (and has for about 6 months) with no problems transitioning.
I think some of the answers are in your profile. You are gone during the day and she may well just be wanting to spend time with you at nite. Also, since you are Breastfeeding, have you eliminated all sources of caffeine, including choclate? Some of the caffeine you consume does go into the breastmilk and can have the same impact on the baby (or even more if she's like me and my kids and hypersensitive to caffeine). Also, you likely need to find out how much your husband is letting her nap during the day and cut back. And, what's the level of activity in your house at nite - are the lites low or are you and your husband fairly energetic and verbal? If so, she may just be stimulated when you are both there and is doing her resting during the day when there's only dad there. I also worked fulltime when my oldest was that age and I would also nurse him at lunch, so while that does give you some good time connecting during the day, it may still not be enough. We found that our son still needed to be in our room at nite - crib beside our bed to sleep at nite.
My (now 6 year old) daughter was very much like yours. She didn't want to sleep in her crib at night, she didn't sleep much during the day either, and I was EXHAUSTED! Now that I've had 2 children, I can look back with 20/20 hindsight and see some of the mistakes I made that made sleeping hard for my daughter and I. I hope it will help, even if your situation might be a little different.
I also nursed both my babies and loved it. Nursing at night made it easier to sleep for both baby and I, and often the kiddos would nurse themselves to sleep and I would leave them in bed with me. Althought that was great when my kids were younger than 3 months, once they got to be 5 and 6 months old, they became convinced that they could only fall asleep by nursing. This started a vicious cycle, wherein baby would wake up every hour to nurse, not because they were hungry but because I was close and it was comforting. When my daughter was almost 9 months old, she woke up one night at 12am and stayed awake until 5:30 am playing. I sat on the couch watching her play and crying because I was beyond exhausted at that point. It suddenly occurred to me that I did not need to be sitting there, she was the baby and I was the mom. So, I put her in her crib and listed to her scream at the top of her lungs for 2 HOURS! She did finally fall asleep, but it was torture for me to listen to it. When she woke up, though, it was like it never happened. She was her usual happy self. She, like your daughter, was horrified at being put into her crib. She would work herself into a frenzy if we put her to bed awake. The best advice I can give you is to start now by putting her to bed awake when it is bedtime. Set a bedtime and stick to it. At her age, she's old enough to cry for a little while, it really won't hurt her. My rule of thumb was to not let them cry for more than 15 minutes. If they were still crying after 15 minutes, I would go in and rub their back, but I didn't pick them up. The next time I would wait 20 minutes before I went back and so on. Within a week, both of my kids got into a very health and much needed sleeping schedule.
I do think there are some babies that do not sleep as much as others, and it seems perfectly normal and healthy. My daughter at 6 months old only took one nap a day, and she also never seemed tired, even when she should have been. Here is a clue to watch for that I figured out from my little girl. She actually got more active as she got more tired. It was almost as though when her body got tired, she started working harder to stay awake. Once I cued into that, it was much easier to tell when she was sleepy. She didn't have the normal tired baby signs like rubbing her eyes or yawning, she just got hyper! LOL
Since I learned from my first baby, my second baby's sleep schedule was so much easier. I wish you the best of luck!
Well, I said this to someone else recently, but it is good to know I am not alone! I literally got about 2 hours of sleep last night with my 5 month old. People keep telling me that sleep begets sleep, meaning that if she gets her naps in, she will sleep better at night. But, how do you force a kid to sleep??? (With out the use of sedation:) I am going to try to get her on a rountine, where I try to get her to sleep the same times every day. I think that 2 naps in the day and a good 8-10 hours at night is about what she should be getting. She is fine with her cat napping until about 8 in the evening, and then I have to hold her all night, or she cries, until she finally decides to sleep, which was at 1 am today. Does your little one sleep on her stomach or back? Mine sleeps on her belly, and just about always has, but I am considering changing that(she cant roll yet) and putting some kind of aquarium toy or something. I wish I had some good advice, but really I just wanted to at least tell you that you are not alone! If we find a solution, I will let you know! ~A.~
The book The Baby Whiserer saved my life, I call it my baby Bible. You should look into it.
L.,
My son was not a napper either when he was little. I read a book Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child. I think that was the name, a friend has it now.
A general overview of the book was a daily routine. Not a to the exact minute thing but something somewhat close. Basically it said to not let them sleep past 7am, do a nap around 9am, do another nap around 1pm and a regular bedtime. It also said that if you put a child to bed at 7pm they will sleep until 7 am. That never worked for me, but my little guy was a 6 to 6:30 raiser and a 8pm bedtimer.
I do in-home Childcare and try to stick to this routine and it really works for me.
Another thing I would like to add is that babies don't sleep well until their nervous systems have developed.
I read one of the posts that said sleep begets sleep and I do believe that is true.
My doctor also told me to leave my son in his crib for an hour even if he woke up after 30 minutes.
I know it is not easy, best of luck to you and your husband.
L.
There are many books and etc on this but.... have you tried a cradle swing?
http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2265268
We called it the baby crack swing. (I know that is crude but she became addicted) There are two settings for the seat. One of them you can have where the baby lies down and it rocks them to sleep. I absolutely love this!!!! M little one who nap in it or want to get in it just to relax. You can use this as your last resort but it works :)
Also my baby likes to be carried in a sling- not a baby carrier- As I would walk around with her she would sleep. Eventually they get used to going to sleep at certain times.
Wow--you have a busy little bee! I would say to cut down on naps, but in your case, try cutting them completely of a day or two. Just see if this helps with nighttime sleeping! Good Luck bc you need sleep too!! :)
I dont know what to do about making ur beautiful girl sleep but if u need sleep i would take her to a friends or ur parents(if they live near by) house for a few hours so that u can sleep. i do it sometimes when i need sleep or my hubby and i need some time alone.
My daughter who is 5 years old now was the same way. I tried everything and read all of the books. "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" was the one that my OBGYN recommended. I would sit on the couch and read it over and over while my daughter screamed and cried until she threw up in her bed. This went on for 11 months. Like I said, I tried everything the books said to do. For most babies, these "let them cry" techniques work. But it didn't work for mine. Finally, I figured out that the problem was her ears. She was having ear infections and even though the antibiotics would clear up the infection, the fluid would remain trapped behind the ear drum. When I would lay her down, the pressure caused too much pain. That is why she could not sleep! She could sleep great in a carseat so I sometimes put her in her carseat to sleep even in the house. She got tubes in her ears at age one and immediately started sleeping through the night. This may or may not be your child's issue with sleep. It is worth checking out. I recommend seeing a pediatric ENT if she has a history of ear infections.
maybe something about the room scares her. try putting her crib, or a play pen, in a different room. Give her time to just sit and play with something in the bed, and occupy her for a while, maybe she will just fall asleep, eventually. It may help if she is in the same room you or your husband, just so she knows she is not all by herself. Good luck!
Hope this doesn't sound rude, but ask daddy what they do during the day to make sure she is being stimulated enough during the day. Not being left in the swing, crib, seat by herself for long periods. If you are the one that gets up with her during the night, she might want that time with you. Some kids do need more sleep than others, I have many sleep issues of my own with my son, so I feel for ya and good luck!
Couple things people either agree w/ me about or hate!!!:
0. Set her bedtime 30 min to an hour before it normally is. My boys are now 4 and 6 yrs old. To this day, they sleep one hour longer in the morning..and more sound thru the night, if I make them go to bed 30 min before I normally do! Weird!
1. To transition my first son into his bed, I took my mattress and put it on the floor beside his bed. Then used the book requested...go in after 2 min, then 5 min, then 10 min, so on, to reassure them. That way, you're not constantly getting up out of bed...your right there!!
2. Bring a chair next to her bed. Start or finish your night time ROUTINE w/ some books. She can sit in her bed and you can sit in the chair. Then she'll associate positive things w/ her bed.
3. If there is a particular 'Mommy' scent like a perfume or something, wear it everyday and spray some on the side of the mattress or pillow(not where she's huffing toxic fumes all night!!) She'll connect w/ the scent and not feel so alone in her room.
4. I HATE to say this to someone I don't know...but make sure your husband isn't using the crib too much during the day so it's easier for him. I know a 2 yr old behaving the same way towards her carseat after the mother gets her back from 'dad's weekend'. She flails and freaks out at the mere sight of her carseat. It seems they strap her in there when she's too much of a handful. If your daughter is spending too much time in there alone during hours she could be cuddling or playing and socializing, the crib is not going to be a relaxing place!! Sorry to have 'asked or accused that'...I have no idea what the dad does during the day from reading your personal profile!! Pls don't be mad! Just trying to help!!
5. MY BIGGIE!!...My boys' cribs were next to their windows. I put about 10 pacifiers on the windowsill. Everytime they woke up in the night(as soon as they could pull up)I would go in there, pull them up to standing and walk them over to the windowsill...make their hand pick up the pacifier and stick it in their own mouth. Two wks of doing this and they pull up to get their own!!! No more getting up every two hours!!!! Yippee!!!!
I was super lucky. Both of my kids take after their mother and sleep like logs. Both were sleeping through the night by 3 months, and I'm currently working towards my daughter (4 months) getting on a nap routine. My savior was the book Sleeping Through the Night by Dr. Jodi Mindell. I have several friends that used the techniques in the book and she literally addresses any and all hiccups that could happen. Good Luck. The good news is that this too shall pass...hang in there!
The best thing anyone did for me when i had my daughter is give me the book, "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child." It has been a life saver with my daughter. I'd suggest buying it and seeing what it says. It has been SO helpful for us!
http://www.amazon.com/Healthy-Sleep-Habits-Happy-Child/dp...
My daughter has a lot of trouble sleeping but has some medical issues. My doctor told me to use melatonin. It is an herbal supplement and helps relax and put them to sleep. She gets it and is asleep withing 15-20 min of taking it and almost always sleeps through the night. But I would ask your pediatrician about it first. You can get it at any health foods store in liquid form.
Oh Mama!
Have you spoke to your pede? I too am a first time mom. My mom, who is now 79 years young - raised 8 children. She POUNDED it into my head that - from birth - set a schedule. Do you give her a bath and a bottle before bed? That helps. SHe may be hyper a bit after the bath, but a bottle and a warm blanket, wrapped up in your arms may help to get her off to sleep real quick. I make sure his days and nights are pretty much consistant. He is OUT LIKE A LIGHT every night b/w 8 and 8:30 like a clock. But it is all consistancy. I never, ever, put him in the crib before he is asleep. He freaks! My boy will be one on Tuesday!!!!
