Should We Adopt a Dog?

Please don't do it until you have come to grips with the idea that yes, it will be a lot more housework, and it's worth it (and if you never reach that conclusion, it's okay). I love dogs. I have 3 (all rescues), and I have worked in animal rescue for 10 years. I am currently the Volunteer Coordinator for a local animal rescue. A dog is a lifetime investment, because if you take in a dog and then resent it or decide to give it away, you will not only send the wrong message to your kids but you will traumatize a living creature. A puppy will pee on your carpet and chew and have a lot of energy - it's what they do. A puppy is a baby, a toddler that will need to be trained and loved and housebroken, etc.

If you want your kids to have the advantage of learning to love animals, volunteer. Get involved with your local shelter or visit petfinder.com and track down a couple of animal rescues in your area. Work some adoption events. You might even offer to foster a puppy for a rescue, to see how it goes and how much work is really involved (some rescues allow a "foster to adopt" option). Then your kids get the experience of being around animals, and if you decide you can't handle a dog in your home (or don't want to), it's only temporary, anyway. Please do not make a commitment until you are ready for it to be permanent. Thank you, and good luck.

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If you adopt a puppy it is for life. If you are not 100% sure you can make that commitment then please do not adopt one. It is really sad when someone gets a puppy and then gets ride of it later on. Yes, the puppy will pee on the carpet at first, it may even poo on it. I do not believe in outside pets. Your puppy should be considered part of the family. If you will not feel that way, then A puppy is not a good choice. Maybe you could try a hamster or mouse. The mess can be controled and their life span is a lot shorted.

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The short answer, from reading your post, is no. Not if you can't come to an agreement that this is what you both want, independent of what the kids want. Because it's great to have a pet for the kids, but no matter what, the parents always get stuck with the care.

Have you told your husband how you feel and what your reasons are? What does he have to say? I agree, having a dog is a major committment and everyone really needs to be on the same page. Have you ever owned dogs yourself or grown up with them?

Granted, our family got a dog for the first time when I was 19. I did not grow up in home with a dog because my father would not allow it but my mother grew up with dogs and missed having one in the worst (we did take in and keep a stray cat when I was 10, who became my best friend and we had him for 16 years). When my mom had an opportunity to get a pug puppy that she had already fallen in love with, she took a stand against my dad and he ended up letting her keep it. He was not happy about it at first but eventually came around and ended up totally falling in love with that dog. There wasn't anything he would not do for that dog and this is not something we could have ever imagined. I don't even think he thought it was possible himself to care so much for a dog, after a lifetime of never owning one.

You are right to be honest with yourself and your feelings - dogs ARE a lot of work and some are easier to take care of than others. There are many breeds out there that were created with different purposes in mind and which one is best for you depends on your lifestyle. Too many times, people do not do their homework, or a puppy is a spur-of-the-moment decision, and they end up with the wrong dog for them, or maybe should never had gotten one in the first place. Then the dog ends up stuck in the bark yard or garage away from it's "pack", or left at a shelter, or worse.

I would keep an open mind and maybe say not right now, but maybe revisit the possibility in 2 or 3 years, when your kids are older and can hopefully handle some responsibilities related to pet care. Research various breeds or consider adopting from a shelter (both purebreds and mixed-breeds can be found there, or through rescue groups). At 10 and 7, they will still benefit from the experience of owning a dog, which does have a lot of positives when everyone is on the same page and willing to make the committment.

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I got my first dog when I was 6 or 7. I've always had a dog as long as I had a place to keep them. We had always started out with a puppy until our last two dogs.

You are depriving your kids, if you don't get a dog. My kids loved our dogs and my grand kids love my current dog. The first words they say when they come to our house is the dogs name. (I personally wish it was "Grandpa", but I understand the pecking order. ;-) )

We rescued our last two dogs (one at a time) from animal shelters when they were about a year old. One was completely house broken and the other almost. (I too hate having pee and poo in my house.) I like house broken dogs much better than a puppy.

We have a dog dish that has a two liter bottle holder for water. Ours is currently a small dog and two liters will last him about 5 days. When we leave for vacation, we leave enough dog food and water for our dog for the time we are going to be gone. The dog uses a doggie door and is just fine and very happy to see us when we get back. Our dog is a breed that doesn't shed, so there is no hair to vacuum. We give him a bath about every 3 weeks to a month and we have no doggy smell in our house.

I've had big dogs (collie size) and little dogs (12" at the shoulder). I like little dogs much better. They don't eat as much and can come sit on your lap. Little dogs don't overwhelm your kids or knock them over accidently. Little dogs don't eat as much and are much easier to take to the vet on that rare occasion when it is necessary. I feed my little dog table scraps and supplement with dog food. Last year my little dog finished off just one 10 lb bag of dog food. It cost me about $3 (for the year!). If you can't afford $3 for a year, you shouldn't get a dog. I have a friend with a big dog. She buys her dog the fancy namebrand dog food and spends as much or more to feed her big dog than my wife and I spend to feed ourselves. But spending that kind of money for dog food is her personal choice, but its not necessary.

If that solves your reasons for NOT having a dog that's fine, if not then examine your real reasons and tell your husband what they are.

Good luck to you and yours. (BTW, getting a year old, housebroken dog is a nice compromise.)

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Agreed. Don't do it unless you are 100% committed. Dogs can be trained not to pee and all that stuff you are worried about but it takes time and work. And you will likely be the one who has to do it as mom. So if you are not willing then don't do it. It wouldn't be fair to the dog. Also know that if you rescue a dog versus getting a puppy, they might have some sort of "issue" that could be a little harder to work with.

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We are sort of in a similar situation. However we have a cat so we get the pet bonding experience.
But both my husband and daughter really want a dog. My daughter has wanted one since she knew what they were!
You have pointed out very good concerns regarding dog ownership. You and hubby need to have a heart to heart, very honest discussion about this.
I am very lucky because my husband has not pushed getting a dog because he KNOWS I will be the one who does most of the work. Even my 7 yr old daughter has mentioned that she knows that I'll do most of the work (this was said very innocently during our discussion of what it takes to have a dog...and she realized she wouldn't be able to handle it all.)
I have slowly gotten used to the idea of getting a dog. I think we will get one a the end of this or next school year when my daughter will be home everyday from school. That way she will be able to play and do all the doggie things.
Good luck

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Your question gives me mixed feelings. I have always had a dog, right now I have 2. I personally couldn't imagine not having one. I do agree with your husband that you are depriving your kids of the wonderful experience of having a dog to love.
However they are a lot of work. But so are kids. You love your kids and you end up loving your dog so the work is worth it.
A puppy is a lot more work than a mature dog. I would suggest looking on Petfinder.com or a shelter for a rescue dog, maybe about 1 1/2 yr old. One that is already housebrokenand, out of the puppy whining and chewing stage. A shelter dog is so grateful for a home and you get to save a life. But they are also a good choice because you can know what you are getting, since an older dogs temperament is more defined than a tiny pup.

Now you will have to have a heart to heart talk with you hubby and tell him you expect him to help care for the dog. If you don't think he will help, then maybe you shouldn't get a dog because I feel having a dog for a pet and companion is a big deal, not to be taken lightly. There is nothing like the feeling of love for a dog and the love a dog returns to you is 7 fold.

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If you don't want one don't get one. I gave in and we got a puppy a cavalier king charles. Every morning like clock work weather I wanted to or not the dog started crying to go out any where from 6:30am to 8am including w/e. Didn't matter if it was raining, snowing, hot, etc. My husband and I split the dog walking he did it Mon-Fri and I had to do the Mon-Fri early morning walks. We could never stay out late because we had to go home to feed the dog or walk the dog. If we were out too late I spent my time wondering if she would hold it or would I have to come home and pick up poop and pee. The vet bills in the first year were about $600.00 and the grooming was another issue. This went on for two years until we moved and the dog could not come with us. I am so thankful that the dog is gone I will not get a dog again until my children are old enough to walk and feed the dog themselves. Think really hard about this because once the dog is there it's impossible to get rid of.

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I'm sure you've gotten lots of excellent advice. The one question I think needs to be asked is: who is going to do the work? If your DH wants the dog, but YOU will be taking care of it, that's not okay..... If he wants the dog, then he needs to willing to help feed it, walk it, pick up poop (or pay to have a service do it--it costs but if you have the $ it may be worth it!), take the dog to the vet (no fun!), order dog license, take them to obedience classes (actually all members of the family should practice with the dog, so the dogs knows its "low on the totem pole"), bathe the dog, play with the dog, etc.

And yes, having a puppy almost certainly means some wear and tear on the house, even if you crate the dog. I think of it like kids--kids do cause wear & tear on the house, just in a slightly different manner. And the parents may have different feelings towards the kid(s) than the dogs...

If the dog is going to be crated (and I do believe in crate training), how much time is that going to be? If the dog is going to be in the crate while you're away from home, and you're gone from home A LOT (not saying you are--just hypothetical), then that is not fair to the dog, particularly a puppy.

I love dogs, and so does my DH, and when we got the dogs, it was with the understanding that I would be the "primary caregiver" to them. We do have a fence backyard, so I don't have to walk them (though I really should...). But for the rest, I'm pretty much in charge & I do the work. I agreed to that, and DH helps when I need/ask for help. Sometimes I do get frustrated with it (mostly when it's a lack of time), but I love them, and to me its worth it.

Adopt a medium to small dog and set limits and boundaries. i.e......cage in the mud or laundry room when you are away so that it doesn't tear up furniture and/or pee or poop all over everywhere. Use gates (the kind you use to keep kids safe/out of specific areas) if you have to. ONLY let the animal in other parts of the house ONCE the dog is potty trained.

Make SURE the kids are involved in the training and the care and clean up. Sign up for a dog obedience class and let the older child be a part of the class. Kids need to understand that animals are NOT just about fun, but include alot of time, effort and expense.

If you think the kids are too young to be that involved w/ the dog, care, walking, etc., then WAIT until they are a little older. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain. IN THE MEANTIME, research different types of dogs- INCLUDE the kids on this......and figure out which one will work best for your family, the environment, etc. Again, they need to know that something like this works BEST if you "do your homework" rather than jump into something and not know what you're getting into.

If they REALLY want a dog (not just your husband) then they will really get into the research, etc., especially the 7 year old. You'll be able to make a much better decision if you take your time. If they aren't interested in looking into the types of dogs, their personalities, etc., then why do you/your husband think they would be interested in caring for one? - Your ? to him.

You could offer to take care of someone's child friendly dog for a few days as a trial run.

Is he going to do all the animal caretaking? Because if he is wanting one, then I'm going to suggest that he do the work. Plus you could really teach your kids some huge responsibility lessons here. You can talk about it with your entire family and talk about who will pick up the extra work. A 4 year old can help vacuum and dust and feed and water. And the 7 year old can do all of that and then some. I would really talk about it with your entire family and make sure they know that you don't and why. Maybe the kids and your hubby will step up and tell you what they will do.
That being said, don't do it if you aren't going to invest time, love, and energy into it. My husband trains dogs as his second job. There is nothing more frustrating for him than people who don't make the effort with their dogs.
One more thing, if you decide to get one, make sure you know what you're getting into. If you're going to rescue one or buy one, you will want to know as much about the dog as possible. And unless you're family is good at training, please please please take them to puppy classes! It would help the dog and your family!!

Why not get a cat? It's still a family pet, and much more self effecient than a dog! Our family has one of each, a dog & a cat. I'm with you on the having to board or find a babysitter thing for a dog. To me, dogs do take away your freedom. With a cat, they have a litter box...no need to let them out several times a day & then have to pick up their poo from the yard! No making time for walks. If you want to leave, you put out a self feeder/waterer that'll last a week! And, our cat is very affectionate...will rub on your legs, hop up into our laps, lick our hands/fingers, etc. I just find a cat easier to care for. And, it's a good compromise. The family gets a pet, and the kids will learn responsiblity by taking turns feeding the cat, and possibly helping with litter box duty! (That's the worst part of owning a cat-but not as bad as picking up dog doodie in the yard!) Lol.

I grew up with a family dog & cat as well, but now that i'm the grown-up & see how much work being a dog owner actually is, i prefer being a cat owner. :) But i did love both of my pets as a child very much! I don't think kids will differentiate between having a cat or a dog...as long as it's a furry pet. (P.S. and, if you get a short haired cat, very minimal shedding...i never see cat hair allover my house!)

You don't say who will be home with the dog. It sounds like you will be the one to take care of it. If you are not willing to do that, do not get the dog. Your kids aren't deprived if they don't have a pet. If your husband wants to clean up after the dog, feed him, walk him, then get the dog. BUT make your husband do the work. Do not do it when no one else will. If you can't agree, don't get a pet.

There are compromises if you are willing to do the work. We just got a pup, our other dog is 2. our kitchen is tile, so right now the puppy isn't aloud anywhere other than the kitchen without strict supervision. I set a timer and the kids help take him out every day, the kids help feed him ect. as well. both dogs are taken to a specific part of the yard to do their business, and for the most part even our older dog who is allowed to run the yard will only "go" in that section, so cleanup is no big deal. And we haven't had any issues with furniture since our first dog was a pup, and the new pup is tiny and couldn't get up on anything if it wanted to. just takes time to get them trained, but if you can get through those first few months, you can get a lifelong family pet that you can take on your trips, or leave home and not have to worry about.

Hi - I have 4 children and NO pets. My husband has always grown up with a dog and I am not an animal person at all. He would like to get a dog but the expense and all the "extras" that having one comes with is a little much for us at this time. BUT......

should you only be on the fence not on one side or the other (like I am :) there is a place out there that you can basically be a trainer for a special needs dog. You give it a home to live in and you don't have the cost of anything. The company pays for the food for the dog, the shots and vet visits and also will keep your dog if you go on vacation w/o the expense of boarding them. This might be an alternative as it will give you a feel of how it will go and help someone else out in the meantime w/o all the expenses.

Let me know if you need more information and I will find out as there are a couple people that I know that do this.

What about a cat? They are much more self sufficient(can go away for day or weekend) and a lot less work. Fish are also good for that but you can't cuddle a fish ;). We have had two dogs and we are signed off of that program for life! I am personally done with pets(for the reasons you mentioned), although we do have a cat. Is he willing to do the work???

I know my husband would love to have a puppy. We moved into a home that is ready for a dog (the previous owners left a large kennel in the backyard and a working invisible fence with a collar). However, I'm currently pregnant with our second child, our first child is only 4 years old, and my husband works a demanding job. I've already told him that we'll get a puppy someday, but now is not the time in our lives to add another responsibility on me. I would end up being the one to take care of it, and I won't have the time after the baby is born. We'll wait until the kids are a little older. Have you told your husband the reasons why you don't want a dog? You might just have to give him an ultimatum. If he wants a dog, then it will be his and the kids' responsibility. You will not train it, take it for walks, feed it, etc. We have a cat, and she's my responsibility because I was the one who chose her years ago. My husband helps with litter because I'm pregnant, but other than that, I pretty much take care of feeding her and boarding her when we're on vacations. Cats are more independent, but they still take training and time when they're kittens. Would a cat be a better choice for your family?

i have had dogs and cats and would suggest a cat instead. they are quiter. and can be left the weekend with plenty of food and no boarding. as long as there is plenty of food and water they will be fine. a dog has to go to the bathroom outside unless you can get a small one that can travel with you. I would suggest a cat instead even though I like dogs better.

That's a tough one. You could get a breed that does not shed to ease some of the housework. If you get a puppy, then yes, I think it is inevitable that some things in the house are going to get chewed, and it's always a pain to find someone to look after the dog when you are away from home. Dogs can be just as much work as kids, especially puppies, so you all have to be really committed to caring for the dog and training it so it will be a positive addition to your family. Dogs can bring alot of joy and companionship, your kids will most likely love the dog and it will be a great playmate for them. As much as I hate the dog hair and dog smell that come with my dog, I would not give her up for the world, she is a great addition to our family. However, I grew up with dogs. It is a little concerning that you are the one that doesn't want one, as I have found that no matter how much the other members of the household swear they are going to help, and it's really fun at first, like many things, this responsibility will probably fall on you. So if you feel strongly about it, I would fight against it as much as you can. There's nothing worse than getting a pet and then having to get rid of it because it didn't work out, that hurts everyone, including the dog. Good luck!

I'd start out with fish. I bet you will have to clean the tank too and feed them. We started with fish to give the kids some responsibility. I do it most of the time. My husband will clean out the tank with the kids. I'm allergic to fish. But I like them anyways.

We got our dog from a rescue. I didn't want a puppy because I didn't want it crying at night or worrying about it while the kids are at school. We got a beagle mix who was already 1 year old. She's a great dog for our family however, she has accidents on the carpet. I have to clean and scrub a lot. It's bad enough the kids make a mess but add the dog and dog hair and it's extra cleaning. I have allergies so the dog isn't allowed in my bedroom at all. It's working out ok. I still find myself taking the dog outside, feeding and giving baths. So yes, think long and hard about it. Or stand your ground when you get the dog. Make them do 75% of the work.

try fostering a dog first... call an adoption place and tell them you want to foster... foster for a while.. see how it goes.. try to get a dog thats a few months old... not a real puppy.... like 4 or 6 mo. old is better...they are usually house trained.. try to get one that doesn't shed or doesn't shed a lot... this will help too... make a calander... with cleaning up poop... like kid 7 year old cleans up on monday night.. and kids 4 year old cleans up on tues.. and put dad on it too.. like he cleans on wed.. make sure they stick to it.. you may fall in love.. or you may not.. just foster.. then let you hubby know what... will we do with dog when we go away???? maybe the pet place has some dog sitters.. i leave mine with my friends.. actulally they come over here to watch the dog... and it works find.. good lcuk.... i love my dog..

Having a dog is a big responsibility, but, it can and usually is worth it. What kind of dog is your husband wanting to get? I grew up with big lazy dogs, (golden retrievers, Newfoundlands, German shepherds) which are the best in my opinion because they don't need to be exercised as much. I always thought that long haired dogs were hard work to keep up with, but we have a Jack Russel (not a lazy dog) now, and he is much worse, in my opinion, but the cat is the worst for hair.

Anyway, I suggest that if you want to give having a dog "a try", then I would recommend an older one. Many times older dogs will lose their people to old age and need a home to live in the rest of their days. These rescue dogs are good loving animals that just need someone to care for them. The bonuses are that they are already house broken, they usually don't make a lot of messes and they don't have nearly as much energy as a puppy. Its not very pc to say, but with a rescue dog, you can give them a try and if you can't handle it, or it doesn't work out, you can almost always take them back. With a puppy, its much harder to get them readopted because they have grown out of the cute and cuddly stage most of the time. Adult dogs can be left alone during the day, and even overnight if needed, especially if you have a dog door, so you don't have to be tied down and you can still have your freedom.

I hope this helps you make a decision. I have also read that kids who grow up with pets are less likely to be allergic to them because their bodies build up immunities as they grow up. Oh, and having a pet is such a wonderful experience that every child should get to have.

Babysit a dog for a weekend to see what it is like. GO the animal shelter and see if you can volunteer. This will help you all prepare and also make every thing "real". It is easy to want a dog but when you have to take care of it that is when reality hits.

If you aren't on board, don't do it! You may wind up resenting your dog and your husband when you assume the extra responsibilities that come with a dog you didn't want in the first place! If you decide to go with it, I would suggest a smaller breed dog as opposed to a larger breed- smaller dog usually equals smaller mess, less hair, less food and vet expense...sometimes less activity depending on the breed you choose. Good luck!

After going through the progression of fish to hamsters to a dog (we always have had cats), I can tell you that a dog is a huge commitment and, while we are attached to and committed to our dog, I would not get a dog again.

He has destroyed our wood floors which can only be fixed by refinishing. He doesn't even shed much but his hair is a constant, the floors are dirty due to his going in and out. We have to plan our vacations based on getting him into the kennel. He is obnoxious to guests (I know, training, but I am obviously not commanding enough to get obedience from this one.) He was a horrible puppy as far as biting and learning his place in the family. He is not a barker, if he were, that would put me right over the edge. I think great dogs are either extremely mellow, or very well trained, and the training is a project that I think most don't have or make time for.

If you decide to get one, really really research breeds and be honest with yourself about your time and energy level. Do you truly like your friends' dogs? Are you thinking, gosh I would take that dog home in a minute. You should kind of feel that way if you think that you want a dog.

Cats are the easiest of all pets, but still affectionate and cuddly (usually!) A pair of kittens would be a great option to consider, but some people just aren't cat fans I know.

Keep asking dog owners what they like and don't like about having a dog, and decide if it's really for you.