Separation Issues

I went threw the same thing with my daughter, what seem to help us was i wore a shirt and put my perfume on it, i would give it to her all the time so she could smell my scent and know that i was close. i also use to call and check on her quit a bit, (which im sure you do as well.) you could even have her pick the shirt out for you to wear and her to keep with her. i hope this helps in some way for you, let me know how it turns out or if it even helps for you.

K.

I thougt I was reading about myself when I read your note. I also went through a divorce when my daughter was 18 months old. We too remained very civil and even continued to do things together just to reassure our daughter. She still had some seperation issues and does to this day(she is 8 now) but she is doing great all things considered. It was hard when she was so little and couldn't understand what was going on. Just keep reassuring her and let her go from room to room with you if it makes her feel better. I would keep away from carrying her but there is nothing wrong with her being around you. Eventually she may even get bored with whatever you are doing and walk away on her own. Hang in there - it will get better. And good for you for being able to remain on good terms with her dad for her sake.... she will appreciate that when she gets older.

Hi. I am 28 years old with 4 children going through a divorce. What my husband and I are doing with our 3 children is he will have them one evening during the week, which lately they have been staying all night, and every other weekend. I find that it works really well. And on top of it, on the weekends that he has them, I use that as my time to pamper myself or go out with the girls, or go shopping. I feel like it really helps.

My son who is now 24 months was like that too. I think it's just a stage they go through.Now he just waves bye to me but he used to be like that as well. Don't worry about it too much. I'm sorry you are going through a divorce.

I am not going through a divorce but have a son the same age who is having complete issues with seperation from me when i use a sitter. I worked nights part time and stayed home with him through the day so he hasn't had much exposure. I am also feeling guilty about leaving him because I need to go back to work and am struggling with putting him in daycare. I have a friend with a similiar story as your and it seemed that time did ride out out the seperation issues. Kids at this age seem to be very clingy... it seems as if it isn't just that she is going with daddy but having trouble with one of you out of ehr sight. I think you are doing the right thing by both of you spending as much time with her as you can cause I have step sons who are 5 1/2 and we only get to see them every wed and every other weekend and then on holidays and such. when they don't see us for a week (except if they are playing a sport and we get a visit) when they do come after that whole week without us they still soetimes cry and say they miss their mom ( almost always at night when they are tired) but then they seems to be fine after a few minutes. I think it is a learning experience and a time game as far as seperation anxiety... but as far as doing the right things.... it sounds to me like you guys are doing everything possible to make the transition as easy as possible for your daughter and that she is having normal kid (especially at 18 months) seperation issues.

I've read that separation anxiety is at it's highest around 18 months. Laminating a picture of you and leaving it with her might help. Sorry I don't have much advice but wanted you to know what you are experiencing isn't uncommon and might not be related to the divorce.