22 answers

Seeking Other Moms with Adult Children That Have Bipolar

I have a 22 year old son with Bipolar. He refuses to accept that and also refuses to take the medication prescribed. Any advice. It is truly exhausting and heart wrenching.

What can I do next?

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Hi T., I have Bipolar disorder and have a daughter who is 32 and has it also. She still refuses to take medication for it. It is so frustrating, but I can relate because it took me years before I would take my medicine. It is hard to admit to the disease, so many people do not understand it. I am still after my daughter to take the medicine, she has to listen someday. Good Luck!
M.

I have bipolar I am 28 and have 4 kids . 2 of them are 3 year old twins I reuses to take the meds because it make very out of it. I just DON't like the feeling of taking them . I GREW OUT OF IT AND LREAN TO LIVE WITH IT AND DEAL WITH IT AND YOU WILL TO. MY MOM,DAD HUSBAND,FRIENDS HAVE THE MEDS AREN'T EVERYTHING. THE MANIC EPISODES WILL GET LESS AND LESS AS HE GET OLDER ! I AM DOING GREAT. MY KIDS ARE GREAT. J.

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Hi T. and all who read this,
There has been remarkable results with Bi-polar, Autism, ADD, ADHD and numerous other maladies by using mangosteen juice. And I don't mean just "any" mangosteen juice, as there are many copycats out there, which is like driving the most expensive car without an engine!!! For those of you who do not want to give their children drugs, this juice is more than worth the try. My son (now 13) was diagnosed with ADD when he was in 1st grade. Well he doesn't suffer from it as bad anymore...because he drinks this juice everyday for the last 2 years and he is drug free. The medications gave him stomach aches and headaches. I congratulate anyone that has "chosen" not to let their diagnosis define their life. BTW, my son also had asthma and has not used his inhalers for almost 2 years. I could go on and on about the benefits of using this juice, but you won't know for yourselves, unless you use it yourself. My whole family drinks it and all I can say is that we wouldn't be without it. Whenever I see something on mamasource about physical or mental maladies I try to get the message of mangosteen to you ladies, I can only lead you to the "water", but I can't make you drink!
If any of you would like more information then please visit this website.....www.freedomfrommeds.com. Listen to Ed's story, Joe's story, check out the company profile and the fact that they give 7% of their profits to children's charities. I am involved with this company because of the integrity of the founders and the fact that this "juice" works! My phone number and email is on that website for those of you that would like more information. All I can say is that it was the best decision I've ever made, to order this juice and continually drink it.

Take care & God Bless,

Rev. Rieley

There is a Dr. in College Station, TX - Dr. David Tharp, off of Southwest Parkway in the office complex across from Eastmark Apartments. He evaluated our nephew for us for bipolar - terrible chemical imbalance. He has a method of helping the brain to right itself by attaching electrodes to the head and measuring the electrical impulses in the brain. It creates a map the brain on the computer. This information can then be used to determine which part of the brain is not functioning properly with electrical impulses and then it can be retrained. They retrain it by allowing the person to watch a move, play a video game, listen to the radio - whatever they like to do that stimulates the brain. Then when the brain electrically fires out of the normal zone, it cuts off the TV/radio whatever. The brain will reprogram itself to fire within the normal range b/c it wants the stimulus. It is an amazing, non-drug, non-invasive treatment that works. Insurance does not pay for it so you might have to take a second job to pay for treatments. They can have 2 treatments/day and Dr. Tharp said that 10 treatments usually shows good results. Our nephew needed multiple times that as no part of his brain was electrically correct. However, his parents opted that they did not want to come to College Station for the treatments even though it was 100% covered by a donation. We may revisit this with them at a later date. Dr. Tharp said bipolar is the hardest and cannot always be cured but that it can be helped greatly with these treatments. We saw with our nephew that the medication they gave him made him a zombie have the time and explosive time bomb the other half. May the Lord bless you in this growth opportunity.

Hi T.,I to am Bi-polar,it is a nightmare,when you are manic you believe you have no boundarys.Drinking and drugs become the self medication of choice.There is not much you can do,other than getting him put into treatment.with the right meds you can live a very wonderful life.I go to the MHMR in New Braunfels and they take very good care of me.tell him life can be good.I wish you all the luck in the world.

G.

Dear T.,

My son was diagnosed as bi-polar in the 5th grade. He is now 17 and is an A-B honor roll kid. At the worst he was hospitalized for violence and suicidal thoughts. When he was in the 5th grade I couldn't deal with his violence and attitude, so he went to live with his father for a year. That was the turning point for him. He was able to see what life as an adult without proper medicine looked like. His father self-medicates with caffeine and alcohol.

My son chose to not let the diagnosis define who he is. It will always be a part of him, but it doesn't have to control him. It is a choice. Recovery is a choice. You can put all the options out there - but like all illness, the patient choses how the illness will affect him.

NAMI has support groups in all big cities and can direct you to one in your area. You can chat with me privately at
____@____.com

My prayers are with your family,
K.

Have you tired calling NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness? They are dedicated to improving the lives of those affected by mental illness including bipolar disorder. The NAMI can offer support and education for families. The local NAMI number is ###-###-#### or you can visit www.nami-sat.org. I hope this will help,good luck. I will be praying for your son.

As I'm sure you know, Bipolar is not something that people "grow out of". In most cases the episodes get worse with age. There is a great book, "The Unique Mind". It is written by a Ph.D whom also is Bipolar. It would be a great book to pass on to your son, no explanation needed - the book will tell the story for you. I passed it along to my adult brother who refused to accept his diagnoses and was tearing our family apart. He later admitted, he could not believe how much he related to the author, her turmoil,her experiences and struggles.
Good Luck, it is a tough long road and I wish you patience through the journey.

T., Don't despair so much that you lose yourself. Kathy that wrote about NAMI sounds like a good resource. I am a 67 yo mom and grandmother with a 43 yo daughter, 44 yo step-daughter, 26 & 24 yo step-grandsons, 23 yo step-granddaughter and a 15 yo grandson who are ALL bipolar. My daughter and grandson take their meds and she is a very productive member of society and he is in high school and doing better than we ever expected. They've both been hospitalized numerous times but do well in spite of the obstacales presented by the illness. My step-daughter and her 3 kids, however, are a different story. She takes all her medicine at once and overdoses on anything she can find. She manufactures illnesses for the docs to treat and lives on pain pills. She started on drugs (illegal) before she was diagnosed and now lives on welfare. Her kids: the oldest refuses to admit he's bipolar and dropped out of H.S. then got his GED and did a year of Jr. College, dropped out and works part-time as a convenience store clerk and was/is heavily into illegal drugs. His younger brother joined the Army but got kicked out for illegal drugs, is working part-time at Starbucks and refuses to take meds for bipolar. The younger sister lies and steals and has had 6 jobs in the last 2 years and takes as many pain meds as she can get both legally and illegally.
She was fired for stealing from 2 of her 6 jobs.
You may want to let your son know what's in store for him unless he takes his meds and works with the docs to get the right ones for him - it's trial and error and takes time.
My daughter is still paying off bills that she ran up during her manic phases before she was diagnosed. This bad stuff is nearly all preventable. You can't MAKE your son take his meds or be responsible for him - that said, you also need to curb the natural instinct to help by bailing him out of trouble. That was hardest for me. " Mom, can I borrow $50 until next payday." Of course I'd do it and not get paid back so I was enabling her to let her illness run her. I finally got brave enough to stop and risked losing her love and she finally got help. It was not pretty nor easy but now I'm so thankful. That all took place about 8 years ago and it changed everything in our relationship and in her and her son's life. I can't stop my husband from being an enabler for his grandkids but that's another story. Good luck and I hope your son finds a way to accept his illness and get help. I hope you find support and some peace, too.

I live with Bipolar in my house. He is of legal age so it is hard. However, there is an organization for support called NAMI. They provide support through lectures and groups. This for people with mental disorders and their families. It is an awesome group, very supportive for all. He may not go but it also cam help you. Your right it is extremely exhausting, exspensive, and heartwrenching. You need support too!! My prayers are with you.

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