Seeking Other 'Hip' Mamas and Papas Living Alternative Lifestyles

T.,

From a fellow Aquarian, congrats on your baby! I have a daughter who is almost 3.5 & I know all about sleep deprivation! She didn't sleep the night through until almost 2 years. It takes a toll; physically, emotionally, healthwise, etc. Make sure you communicate this with your partner & don't be afraid to ask for help.

As someone stated earlier, if the house doesn't get cleaned, let it be. Try your best, but honestly, don't beat yourself up about it. The nurse at the hospital told my hubby "If you come home from work & your baby has a clean diaper & your wife brushed her teeth, it was a good day." It's true! A newborn takes constant attention.

My family is pretty conventional, but I have lots of friends who aren't & we are totally supportive of differing lifestyles. Please know that lots of us are out there & we're here to support!

If you want to PM me, feel free! Where are you located?

Oh it doesn't matter what walk of life you come from every new mom has been through the new baby experiences. Just try to rest when you can and ask for help. I have a 3 yr old and an 11 mo old and I love love love to sleep. So when those sleepless nights took over my life it was a huge shock! I also ended up having some post partum depression too. In the beginning I felt like I had to do everything myself but when I learned to ask for help my life got a lot easier. Good luck and congratulations on your baby!

T.,

I know how it can be, I have a five month old...I am still going through the sleep deprivation and stress of a new baby!! My advice for you would be to get out of the house and do something, I staied home for the first 2 weeks...and I felt so depressed. But I started taking my daughter to the mall or the park, just places that that helped me not to feel isolated, and that really helped! I know your baby is still very new...and you don't want to take him somewhere where he could get germs. But when you feel like the time is right...fresh air and socialization could really help your outlook.
As far as the sleep goes...it does get much better and fast!! For one, because you get used to less sleep, and also, they start sleeping better after about 2 months (sometimes sooner). My little one is still up about 3x per night, but it used to be just awful, I felt sick everyday because I wasn't getting sleep! And from what I hear, some babies dont sleep through the night for the first year. So just stick it out and know that you are not the only person up at 11, 12, 2, and 4am feeding your baby...there are many of us out there!! Good luck!

E.

Hey T.,
I'm going through sleep deprivation as well...although, I don't have a newboen any longer (he's almost 4)....however, we just relocated here last month (Atl by way of Austin), and I'm stressed....I for sure need some adult conversastion, outside of my beautiful husband. Give me a call or write....where are you located?
____@____.com
M.

I totally can relate to the sleep depervation... I have a 5 month old son that had been sleeping through the night and all of a sudden he's up every hour. I can also relate to needing adult interaction. When my son was born I felt so overwhelmed with all of his needs and while I loved every minute being with him I just needed adult conversation. Evergreen hospital has a great program for new moms. The parent baby classes are wonderful. Its a bunch of new moms going through exactly the same thing you are. You will get the adult interaction that you are looking for and get any questions about baby or parenting answered by the lactation specialist/nurse that runs the class... mostly its just a place to talk to other moms and make new friends. The 0 -3 month class is free so its worth a try. We have been going since my son was 1 month old and it has been a life saver.

My Imani is 9 months old. It is a joy and one of the most difficult things I have ever done. The sleep situation really does get better. It's fine to feel exhausted and overwhelmed, it doesn't mean you don't love him! I know what you mean about wanting to be on top of things, but if the house isn't tidy and you don't have the best food for dinner, it's OK. You can do it tomorrow, but Soloman will never be 12 days old again. Enjoy him as much as you can, just lay around breathing him in. But big person contact is definitely important too! Try bringing him to a coffee shop for an hour while he naps in the stroller. The First Weeks class is also great, it's a drop in class so you can try it out and if it isn't for you not harm done. But it's a great place to ask all those little questions and talk to people who are going through the same thing as you.
http://www.communitybirth.org/classes&events.html
Good luck to you!

It's normal to feel overwhelmed. I have had 3 children, 2 at WWU and 1 in 7th grade. You need to relax and allow your adrenaline to subside. Having a child is such an incredible experience. Your natural endorphins will kick in and you will be just fine. Allow mother nature to work. If you don't feel better in another 2-3 weeks consult a doctor.

I'm an Aquarius and I have 2 Aries. There is a saying, "God doesn't give mothers Aries unless they can handle them." I have 2. They have incredible personalities.

C.

Hi T.,

Welcome to mamasource! Having a new baby has many challenges. :) I feel your pain as I have a now 2 1/2 year old. :) The first year I think was the toughest as I just did not know what to expect all the time. What a joy though! How grateful I am to be a momma. :) We want 3 or four more too. It is wonderful that you are seeking support. Blessings to you and your family and know that you are not alone and with faith can make it through. All the things you mentioned are so common. Just remember your baby reflects who you are and what a gift to give. Just love and love and love and truly God will bless and make all things good and beautiful!

Blessings,

K.S.

Hey T.,
Congrats and welcome to the wonderful world of mothering.
I'm not going through it now, but I've been there. Don't know where you live, I am in Seattle. Sometimes it is just good to have another person come over and hang out with you while you nurse, bring you tea and talk about what the baby is doing today. When my son was little I did this a lot with others. It is a great way to communicate with others who care about who you are and what you are doing with your life. Some of my closest friends came to me this way.
I would love to visit or meet you for tea if you'd like. I am a Leo mom (Leo 1st house, leo rising) of an Aries 13 yr old boy and his Aries dad. Babies have always been a special love of mine, always will be. Only grew one in my body but have many friends i met as infants. Don't know if this makes me "hip" but it makes me happy.
Always try to remember that what you are doing with your baby is sacred time. You are his first and finest introduction to the world. You are the center of his understanding. You are love. This is the hardest and one of the most profound callings.
Best to you and your beloved boys, paula