Seeking Moms with Learning Differences and Depression

Hi,
I have 3 children ages 17, 6 and 2. My first child comes from a previous marriage, so I know the feelings of stress and being overwhelmed. I also moved into a new neighbor three years ago. That being said, all mothers get overwhelmed and stressed out. The more honest you are with friends and family the more support they will give you. My husband had a hard time admitting I was depressed. I did what I was suppose to do to feel better, such as take time for myself, have friends, and exercise. For me, I needed more then that. I was sitting in my Dr.s office, and saw an ad for Cymbalta, which is an anti-depressant. It listed the exact way I was feeling. I have been taking Cymbalta for two years now, and the results are fabulous. I have a whole new lease on life. There were some side effects that lasted several weeks, but it was well worth it. Anti-depressants are not for everyone, however, if you do not taken then currently, and you have tried many other ways to help your emotional well being, then you should speak to your dr. I am much more happier, relaxed and have loads more patience. I use to be so overwhelmed by school, shopping, activities and play dates. Now I feel more confident in general and I can handle so much more. I do make a point not to over schedule our lives. It is also important to be firm with the children. If you say no, stick with it. They will continue to whine and wear you down, if they know they can eventually make you give in. Choose your battles. I had to realize that my children did not think like me. They do not see the blankets, pillows, and chairs all over the livingroom and more work or a mess, they see it as an awesome fort to hide in, surrounded by water and dragons...(well if it was a boy) lol...
Hang in there. Talk to people that will support you!
It took me 4 long, miserable years to figure out what was going on with my life.
Feel free to email me if you need someone to talk to.

HI C.,
I WAS ALWAYS DEPRESSED TOO AFTER MY LAST CHILD BIRTH. AFTER MY GRANDMOTHER PASSED, THAT WAS THE LAST STRAW FOR ME. I HAD A MILD BREAK DOWN AND HAD NO CHOICE TO GO AWAY FOR 2 WEEKS. YOU DONT WANT IT TO GET TO THAT POINT.
ANYWAY, I FOUND THIS GREAT THERAPY CLASS. ITS CALLED DBT. DIALECTICAL BEHAVIORAL THERAPY. IT TEACHED YOU HOW TO THINK AND REACT TO THINGS DIFFERENTLY. ITS ONLY ONCE A WEEK. AND IT WORKS. I WILL GIVE YOU THE NAME AND NUMBER. JUST EMAIL ME AT ____@____.com
CHRIS H

I wish I could advise you on this one but, I'm going through the same thing and I only have one little one at home. When I start reaching my end with her, I either go in the other room for a few minutes or I ask my husband to watch her.

Well I can definetly see where you are coming from. I to am very depressed and i have never done anyting about it. At time s it eats me up inside and makes me feel horrible. There are many times when my I have nearly no patients and I can't deal with anything. I have thought about asking for some medication but they all have side effects. Growing up they said i had depression and had me on all kinds of antidepressants and then they said i had ADD and put me on meds for that which i think made matters worse. I haven't taken any of these drugs for almost three years. I know i am depressed and should be on something but it is hard after all that i have been through.

How old are your children?

With my kids I find its best to be upfront with them, i get horrible migraignes and when i get them NOTHING helps, and I found telling them whats going on in terms they can understand makes the day easier, when I tell them I have a headache and noise and light hurt my head and make me grouchy they are more understanding and well behaved than when im just grouchy and dont explain whats going on.

They now understand when I say I have a migraine what goes along with it especially my oldest and shell try to get the younger two do play quietly with her, or watch a movie which is a huge help!

I know that it is overwhelming when your kids have temper tantrums but your only making the problem worse. When they start that up tell them that I said no and leave the room. Go to another part of the house. Some place where you can hear them but not really have to watch them. If you stop giving in the tantrums will stop. The more you give in the more they are going to happen. Because they know that all I have to do is "this" and I get my way anyway. Just ignore them when they act that way. You may want to show them a smart mommy, but I think a strong one is a good thing for them to see too.

i do have to ask why having ADD & learning difficulties make you depressed. i think if you focus lesss on what is wrong & more on your good points you will feel better.
My husband is bi-polar & has learning difficulities but once he relaxed about his illness he now feels & acts better. Kids sense parents moods so if your stressed they are more like to act up.. they throw a temper tantrum have them go in rooms till calm. What do you enjoy doing? Me i read & play games to relax.