Seeking Moms - Claymont,DE

Naa N, I used to put a Cheerio or Froot Loop in the toilet and tell my son to aim at it. I also rewarded my son with a sticker when he successfully used the toilet. As far as his bowels, many children are afraid feeling like they are losing a part of them. With my son, I would use the toilet and say bye bye poopy, wash my hands and leave the bathroom. My son soon followed suit. Good luck to you.

In my opinion, your son is just not ready. We have 3 sons, 1 daughter and another son due in 18 days. In our experience, the kids will fight you on it until they are ready. We actually didn't use a potty chair. We got the padded seat that fits on the actual toilet seat. We would occassionaly try it, but if they said no we didn't push it. All of the boys were about 3 when they trained and it took all of 2 days to get them potty trained once they were ready. All of our boys started the weekend wearing diapers and ended the weekend done with them except for at night. The more you push your son the more he'll resist. I'm sure he can sense your frustration which in turn will cause him anxiety. We also found that my husband teaching the boys worked better since he could 'go' with them and they could be just like daddy.

Good luck!

I am in the same boat with my 2 1/2 year old daughter. I went to this website www.thepottytrainer.com and purchased her book. I have read it thoroughly and plan to start the process as she outlines it this weekend. best of luck to you!!

I honestly think the less pressure the better when it comes to the potty. He'll do it when he's ready. It's all about control and when he feels like he's losing it he'll do things like poop under the table to get it back. I'd put a diaper back on him, wait a month or two and try again. I wouldn't worry too much about him meeting other kids younger than him that are trained. That might actually be his incentive to do it; and if it isn't, so what. If it doesn't bother him, don't let it bother you.

I am in the same boat!! My daughter (2 1/2 years old) was doing so well with going to the potty and then one Saturday I tried the cold turkey trick and she reverted backwards! She pees in her pants all the time now and does the hiding thing when she poops as well. I am really frustrated with the whole thing and am at my wits end as well. If you get any good tips please share with me! Obviously the cold turkey trick didn't work. She would run and pee in her pants on purpose when we would ask her to go in the house and go potty!! Any help you get please share with me!!!

At this point it comes down to 2 things: he doesn't want to be controlled and why not pee in your diaper rather than the potty? Kids are basically dry right after peeing into a disposable diaper so they really don't have the uncomfortable feeling. It sounds like he's totally capable. You need to take the diapers away (except nights) and put underwear on him. Try to sit him on the potty when you think he needs to go and praise/reward him when he does. If he refuses to sit on the potty you can just let him have accidents and show him what he needs to do everytime he has an accident. My 34 month old son did that for a week before he decided it was easier just to put his pee in the potty. As for poop, you could get him to the potty when you see him going. What worked for my son was letting him run around bare-bottomed. He hated the feel of the poop falling down his leg. Good luck! Just remember that if you decide to take the diapers away it's a major commitment so make sure YOU are ready!!

He is just not ready yet. I have 2 boys (both potty trained) and they didn't show signs of REAL readiness until after age 3. Trust me - if you push now...it will take you about a year to accomplish the training. If you wait a little longer (6 months) - you can likely have in trained with a week or two. You will likely have more luck in the summer as well - much easier to train.

I'm guessing you need to have him trained for pre-school requiements, etc (just a guess). As summer starts - purchase the cool potty seat, use cheerios for "aiming" and PRAISE him everytime he makes an attempt (successful or unsuccessful). Also - do you have other kids around (neighborhood/playgroup) who already use the potty?? If so - let him hang around with them. It helps reinfornce the whole potty concept.

Best of luck!!!!

The best potty trainng tool I found with my girls was to stop using diapers or pull up. use training pants. they don't likefeeling wet, and are more apt to go to the potty. Most children tend to have bowel movements around the same time each day. figure out that time and place him on the potty. If he goes - use the reward system. My kids nevr got candy at home so we potty trained with M & M's. When they went they got to pick out say 4. If they didn't go, they would get 1 if they set there and tried. Pull ups and diapers are the worst because the kids can't feel they are wet.
Mom of two, one now 29, other is 16 and one more year of high school before college.

My first child almost potty trained herself -- except for bowel movements. She would go stand in a corner and think she was hiding .. . finally, we caught her, and I said to my spouse, "Quick! Grab her and put her on the toilet!" He did, It came out in the toilet. He praised her to the hilt. And everything was fine after that . ???

Regarding No 1? The funniest potty training I've ever heard was a friend who lived in the country, pretty far back from the road. She put her sons in oversized T shirts and nothing else during the summers. And they went outside to play. They figured it all out very quickly, and never once peed in the house. . . (she thought that for some wierd reason, they couldn't tell they had to go when they were wearing training pants or undies.) I think that one's a riot for little boys. !!

When he sees younger children using the potty this summer, he may catch on and want to be a BIG BOY, too !

Hi, many times it is not that they don't want to tell you they need to go to the potty. Many times it is that they don't grasp the correlation between the dirty diaper and the potty.

What you can do the next time he does this is take off the dirty diaper and walk him over to the potty and show him where the poop goes by taking the diaper and turning it inside out so that the poop falls into the potty.

This way he will start to put two and two together. Good luck!

Each child is different and so is their development. my son is 3 and he isn't even ready to be potty trained, which is partially my fault because I tried to train him before he was ready. However my daughter who is 2 is showing signs of readiness. let your son tell you when he needs to go potty by watching him, watch to see how he acts when he is going potty, He might grab at his privates, start touching his lower back or pulling at his diaper, squat and grunt, or grab his nose and say Pu. It might also help if he is around other kids who are using the potty that are about his age. He will look up to them and want to be like the "big kids".
I've heard that if you take off all your child's clothes and let them run around with nothing on and then take them to the potty if they start going they train faster. However this can be a big mess and your going to want to do it in the summer and outside (if possible where no one can see). Try to distract him when he is on the potty by sitting the potty in front of the TV (when training inside) with his favorite thing to watch. Stay with him to make sure he sits there(inside or outside). and if he goes even a little bit make sure you reward him big (with a cookie, his favorite snack, a sticker, a dance clapping maybe some bubbles just something that makes him feel special) as soon as he is done.
what ever you do don't train on your time table let him tell you, if you try and he isn't ready it will be harder to train him. You might even make him afraid of the potty.

try teaching your son sign language if his isn't speaking it really does help and he will learn to speak the word faster.

I have a 6 yr. old daughter and almost 4 yr. old son and I can tell you that every child is different in regards to potty training. I went through the same thing as you with my daughter. My goal had been to have her potty trained before my son was born - but that didn't exactly happen! What I started doing with her was leaving her without diapers/pullups for short periods of time while we were at home. Little by little I'd increase the amount of time she was without diapers. (we had hardwood floors-not carpet in the house!) Of course she had her "accidents" but at the same time, she realized that doing #1 or 2 in your underwear is alot more uncomfortable than doing it in your diapers/pullups! First we got the peeing part down, then it was getting her to poop on the potty. I think it was scary to her to see what came out into the potty and that's why she was more reluctant to it. Because if you think about it, when children poop in their diapers, they don't see any of it - we lie them down, clean them all up and they don't have anything else to do with it. Going on the potty, they see what came out of them and have to wipe themselves off! Well, I can tell you that I did the same thing with my son, but started earlier and he learned alot quicker than my daughter. By 2, he was completely potty trained! I hope this helps you and I wish you good luck! Most importantly, you have to keep insisting and whatever technique you choose, be consistent!!

I have not had to cross this bridge yet, but from other kids I know and everything I have read, kids need to be ready to potty train and they are all ready at different times. It's like all other developmental milestones, each child reaches them at his/her own pace. Since your son is running away and hiding when it's time to use the potty, it sounds to me like he just isnt' ready yet. Keep encouraging him and showing hime the potty, and soon he'll be ready. Good luck!

I would say he will only train when he is ready...it won't help if you pressure him too much...my 3 yr old still sleeps wets and we started him when he turned 2.

when I was pregnant with my daughter, I talked to my then 2 year old son everyday about the potty. He wanted nothing to do with it. On the day of his third birthday, he came out to the living room, ripped off his diaper, and said "mom, I want to use the potty!" It took until he was almost four to poop in the potty. I had to tell him the poop needed to be with his family, so it was a game when he would flush it down!!! My point is that your son will go when HE is ready, not when you are. This can be frustrating, but please remember, time goes so fast. Before you know it, he will be going on his own. It takes lots of love and patience. I would still remind him about it and praise him ALOT when he goes. Maybe you could offer him his favorite candy after a successful poop on the potty. This worked awhile for me, but in the end, he needed a game to keep him interested. Good luck!!

Hi Naa,

I think the problem is that many parents don't realize that most kids are not ready to be "fully" trained until at least 3 years old. I didn't realize this myself until my daughter, who is now 5. She didn't "pee train" until 3 and "poop train" until 4, but once she did it (without my forcing or nagging) she was done! No pull-ups, no accidents and through-the-night dryness...instantly. Because I did not try to force the issue and let her go at her own speed, she became a pro from Day One!

I only wish I had known this with my son (who is almost 18). With him, I DID force the issue and he was trained at 2. However, he had many problems with accidents and bed-wetting until he was 8! I know now that this was most likely due to his not being ready (but only doing it because I forced him to), along with the anxiety it caused him.

So, my advice would be to be patient with your son and let him go at his own pace. It may be inconvenient for YOU, but it will be much better for HIM in the long-run!

Good luck!

R.

I am having a similar problem. My son just turned 3 and I started potty training about 3 weeks ago. He is completely trained for peeing, but refuses to poop in the potty. I've tried the sit them when its time tactic, and he just sits a few minutes and says he doesn't have to go, and then 5 minutes later I find him smelling of poop. He could care less about having it in his underwear. Every time I take him to the bathroom, dump it on the potty and tell him poopy goes in the potty. He is completely unphased. My daughter NEVER pooped her pants so this is all new to me. I have promised him a basketball game he wants if he goes on the potty, but that still is not inspiration enough apparently. Next I plan to go get a few items and make a potty basket with things that he can only play with when he sits on the potty. I am hoping that with him sitting eventually he will relax and poop and hopefully after that he will be home free! Good luck!

Well, he seems to know when he has to go - which is good, and a starting point. With my son I put him on the potty every hour or so - I just said it's time to go pee. I didn't ASK if he wanted to go, or had to - sometimes they will always say no. Watch him VERY closely - if you see him wandering away grab him and put him on! My son had "accidents" until he was probably three - that's when I noticed him actually stopping to go to the bathroom instead of me telling him to go. Good Luck.

That is normal (the hiding to poop). Realize that he is recognizing the urge to poop and that is a great sign of getting ready for potty training. IMO, he's a little too young still. My son needed to be "3 and potty trained" for his nursery school. Give it a few more months. No harm in waiting a bit. Quit talking to him about HIM going on the potty. Just talk about the toilet in general for a while.
Get him the book and/or DVD Once Upon A Potty (boy version). That got my son very interested in potty training. Good luck!