My 4 year old son has ASD, and SPD, so I am very familier with your stresses. We have to keep my son's hair cut extreemly short, otherwise he claws and scratches at the back of his neck when ever he gets the least little bit hot. Is that why you keep your son's hair cut so short also? Does it grow quickly so that you have to do it that often?? We found that if I can wait 4 or 6 weekes between the hair cuts, it seems to be less stressfull for him. I had been going to cool cuts as well, but found it was just as easy to do them at home. He and my husband get hair cuts at the same time, and since I just shave my husbands head down to a 1/2 all over, and my son has a high and tight, it is super easy!! I sit him down in front of the tv, maybe give him a snack, let him feel the clippers while on with his hand and tell him that they are going to tickle him. As soon as we are done, he gets to go jump in the shower with daddy and wash off all of the hair as quickly as possible. (OH, and I got my clippers at walmart! they were only $19.99, and came with all of the gaurds and a carry case!!)
If you are not comfortable cutting his hair, or if he holds grudges, then ask the hair dresser from Cool Cuts if she makes house calls! (I was concerned at first that my son would be mad at me or scared of me for cutting his hair becuase it is so stressfull for him, but becuase we made it a game, it was a lot easier than I had thought it would be. And he doesnt stay mad or upset for long.) And because he LOVES the shower and taking baths, we get in it as quickly after the hair cut as we can, he takes his mind off of the stress of the hair cut, and I can just grab the vaccuum and clean up the floor and it takes 2 minutes!! It is still a matter of stress for us and he puts up a little bit of a fuss just before we start, but he rebounds quickly when it is all said and done.
I know how stressfull it can be to have a child with the special needs that ours have, so if you would like to ever message me personaly, please feel free to! I know some days, I feel so lost and no other mom understands what I go through daily with my child, and it would be nice to have some one arround that understands, and trade tips with!
Good luck! I look forward to hearing from you!!!