Seeking Advise - Foley,MN

I agree with what the other moms have said about quality of shoes, that makes a big difference but let me offer another perspective also.

It sounds to me that your daughter has some sensory texture sensitivities. Many kids have this with seams, fabrics etc... I know one mom who's daughter has to wear her socks inside out because the seam at the toe bothers her. I know another boy who will only wear elastic waistband athletic pants, no bluejeans because of how they feel. Sometimes this even carries over into light sensitivity and food texture sensitivities.

I would perhaps look at the root cause of the sensitivity. It could be a nutritional deficiency. I'm a nurse who practices nutrition and lifestyle medicine and when I see kids with sensitivities I usually put them on an Omega 3 fish oil, preferably a cod liver oil. I can recommend a kid friendly brand. I also put them on a 5 strain probiotic.

When kids are sensitive, one of the reasons could be that they are not getting enough essential fats to give that myalin sheeth in the brain enough to insulate the nerves. So to them, it sort of feels raw or like they are on their last nerve ya know? Think PMS just about texture all the time, that would be tough wouldn't it?

The probiotic strengthens their gut to aid their bodies in getting rid of toxins. Some kids are sensitive because they carry a significant toxic load. Some kids have a harder time detoxing on a daily basis and that sort of turns the volume up on everything too.

Another thing you might consider doing is reducing the sugar in her diet and reducing the amount of wheat she eats. Both of those things can really impact behaviors and feelings.

Hope that helps, let me know if I can help in any way.

1 mom found this helpful

I have been reading these mamasource posts long enough to tell you that the responses you have so far telling you that you are not alone are the tip of the iceberg. It seems that this is a fairly common problem--the sensitivity issue. I remember my aunt dealing with it with my cousin. I hope some of the suggestions here will help you deal with it. I just want to add something from my experience that may seem a bit far-out to you (it did to me), but I can absolutely attest that it works.

Cranial Sacral Therapy works with adjusting the structures of the cranium to allow the many, many nerve pathways involved there to be freed up to work correctly. At least I think it's something like that. All I truly know is that when the therapist had adjusted my 9-month-old baby she was able to sleep peacefully for the first time ever in her entire life. So I had her adjust my 2-yr-old. That little girl almost overnight exchanged her whiny, clingy, frequently screaming attitudes in for inquisitive, focused exploration and happy family interaction. I am inclined to believe that a lot of the time our children are oversensitive because they already have sensory overload from the discomfort that they constantly live in. If this interests you, you may want to look at this website www.cranialmethods.com

She sounds like one of my kids. I buy their shoes a size to big and turn their socks wrong side out. Their little feet are used to being pretty free in the summer and they have a hard time adjusting back to tennis shoes. The seam along the toes on the socks makes them all crazy. I wish they made seamless socks!

I feel for you. My son has always had very sensitive feet so I've had to be careful on the shoes I've purchased for him. I have to admit that there is a difference between the higher priced shoes and the less expensive ones. Until this year, we have always had to purchase all leather shoes for him. Also, we had to be extra careful on how high the back of the shoe hit his achilles tendon or it would hurt. It will be hard in the beginning because you'll really need to experiment and try on lots of shoes. She may not even know which ones are best ones and you might have errors but the good thing is that once you find a brand (or brands) that work with her type of foot, then you can keep going back to that one each time you need new shoes. I would really recommend that you try a place that specializes in fitting children. Also try to find someone who is more experienced. Stride Rite is also a great place.

Have you tried a podiatrist? It seems her feet hurt her. They might be super sensitive. Buy well cushioned shoes. My daughter broke her clavicle and I had no idea. I thought it was nothing. I found out years later, wish I had listened to her. From that time on, I vowed I would be at the doctor's office every time they complained of pain. That might have been extreme, but you never know.

They are a bit expensive but I buy all tennis shoes from Stride Rite. They measure the feet for the perfect fit. Of course both of my girls have wide feet so it is hard to find shoes anywhere but Stride Rite.

I agree with the others that it sounds like sensory issues. Is she this way with her clothing too? Does she have issues with food textures, etc.? You might want to consult an occupational therapist to have her evaluated. Another issue could be a medical condition with the heel itself. Does her heel ever hurt when she is barefoot or just with the shoes? There is a fairly common heel condition that kids develop while growing (it's called "Sever's Disease" although it's not a disease) and that might be another explanation if it's also happening while barefoot or if it's a new development. They grow out of it, but it can cause discomfort off and on over time. In the meantime, I have two boys with sensory issues, and I have issues with socks myself. It is really hard to find 100% cotton socks, but that is what I try to do. Both New Balance and Stride Rite make wide tennis shoes which might relieve some pressure on her heel. Stride Rite will size her feet for you too.

One more thing--be careful with the Crocs. My boys and I love them too, but there are a few things to watch out for. They are VERY slippery when wet. They become like ice skates. I have a pulled hamstring right now from slipping on wet Crocs. Also, there is possible litigation developing from kids wearing Crocs getting their feet caught in moving escalators. We use our Crocs as slippers or something quick to put on to get the mail, etc., but not as regular shoes.

Gap kids has nice thick girls socks that really cushion the feet. Nike Air shoes from kids foot locker have good arch support and a cusion at the back. Schuler shoes locations have foot doctors there once a week that could evaluate her feet and give you suggestions too. The service is free. Call your nearest locatin to find out when the docs are at that particular store. Stride rite has good shoes for kids too.

L.-
My kids LOVE to wear the rubber shoes, Crocs. They have the strap in the back to help keep them on, and they can be thrown in the washer or washed in the sink and they are clean. They have all different kinds you can buy, and with winter coming up, they have the ones with the fuzzy insides. They also come in so many different styles and colors. Have you tried tights on her, instead of socks?? maybe those would be thin enough? My son also complained of his socks hurting him after wearing sandals all summer, thankfully he got used to them, but he still strips them off the second he gets in the door. Good luck to you!!!

Totally my son! What we have done that works, sort of...

--buy small quantities of a variety of socks. We found Hanes fit loosely, which he doesn't like, until they're too small, and then the seam doesn't fit right. We've gone through about 4 brands, but let me tell you, it's totally worth it to find something he LIKES and will WEAR on his own without a fight!

--My son wears shoes that are literally about 4 sizes too big. I've found that, particularly with athletic shoes, "little kid" shoes have rounded backs. When you get up into bigger kid shoes (out of toddler sizes, or even into 6-7-8 sizes in bigger kid shoes), you start getting shoes that fit like adult shoes--with two bumps on the back and a dip that is kinda supposed to fit your Achilles heel. My son HATES that. I refuse to buy him skater shoes, so we have found somewhat-geeky looking white "walking" shoes, but for little kids! (They were cheaper, too.)

--Finally...I have found that a lot of his issue is about things feeling stiff and not worn in enough. So...when he is distracted, I try to get those things on him that he doesn't like. I also usually take a look at the item, and wonder to myself if it would bother ME (my MIL buys a lot of stuff for him that's very cheap--he doesn't like the way those types of pants fit--and neither would I...so they get put in rummage). If I think he SHOULD reasonably be able to wear it (cotton socks that fit), I wait for the "right" time. For him, that's times when he's sooo excited to be doing what he's doing (we're heading to the fair to see a rodeo...grandma and grandpa are coming...) that he's more eager to BE dressed than he is to throw a fit about it. Also, he is so in love with his grandparents that sometimes THEY can get him to wear things I can't. In this way, we have introduced new items, or items I've already bought that I want him to be able to wear. Sometimes things just don't work, and that's frustrating (esp when it's shoes I spent a good amount of money on!!!) but probably 75% of the time I can eventually convince him to wear what I want him to.

Good luck!

You may want to hit stride rite. They are expensive but we have had the same issue and stride rite shoe people have helped.

It sounds like a sensory thing....some people just don't like socks and shoes. My husband and my son are the same way. You just have to search and search for shoes and socks that they can wear and don't bother them. My son likes his crocs and his BiCal grippers...but his other shoes he takes off the second he thinks he can get away with it. He hates slippers, can't stand to wear socks...just like my husband. If he could (husband) he would live in flip flops. He likes them because he can get them on and off easily...on when he HAS to have shoes on and off every other second of the day. I feel your pain...it is a long hard process to find socks and shoes they will wear. I, however, love shoes and socks...I wear them from the moment I get up until I get into bed. I hope you are able to find socks and shoes she will be comfortable in.

i have a hard time switching to shoes at the end of the summer, too.
the sock thing... i had a coworker who HAD to wear her socks inside-out because the seam just drove her nuts!!!!

Any chance you have her in the wrong shoe size? I have found alot of the shoes from places like Target, WalMart, Kohl's,sometimes even mall shops etc. are often ill-fitting, not so well made (heel area curved into the back of the ankle too much, too narrow, too wide, the arch in the wrong place or not enough arch at all)and their size charts unreliable.

Take her to a store where her feet can be properly sized and the shoes are well crafted. All she needs is one really well-made pair of all purpose shoes. I know it's pricey, but Nordstroms is known for the shoes and shoe sizing. Or try a store that specializes in orthopedic/comfort shoes. Considering her feet and their formation, getting them properly sized is important, and worth the investment.

I would call her doctor's office to see if they have any suggestions. You may also want to take her to a podiatrist, a specialist in problems of the feet. It may be that she has a mal-formation of the feet or that her shoes just don't fit right. My brother was a podiatrist, now deceased, and he always either went shoe shopping with us or checked the fit of my kids shoes. He also had fits whenever I wore high heels but you just can't take my high heels away from me; even though I know they are not good for my feet.