I can relate a little to your son; I'm the eldest of a large, tightly knit family and I wouldn't ever want to repeat my adolescence, ever.
My problem was that I craved air to breathe. With all of my sisters and my parents and relatives, everyone was always attentive and everything, it was so difficult just to get a sense of my own identity and figure out what I would do with my life.
I think you sound like a caring, loving parent. It seems like you're doing everything you know how to in order to maintain a positive relationship with your son.
My advice is this; from what I can tell of the story is that your son is readying himself for independence and self-sufficiency. A young man needs his space. Actually, everyone does.
What I hear him saying when he says he'd more likely confide in his friends than in his family, is that he wants to make a positive contribution to the family and he needs to figure out how he'll do that, on his own, as an independent person.
What I do in order to prepare for my eight-year olds eventual development, is to read books geared towards adolescents and young adults. When I do this I'm reminded of the challenges I faced; I can step back and allow the outcome of the small problems and the greater gains. After all, one day he'll be full grown. He'll be a man, hopefully a mature young man with good manners. Respecting the space of others is a critical skill.
All the best,